by Michele Lee
She heard a car pull in the driveway and Mace ran to the front door with Marisol trailing behind him. It was Nate and by the look of his face as he stormed up the pathway only told her brunch didn’t go so well. “Nate?” He walked up to her with tortured eyes and immediately grabbed her into his arms burying his face into her neck looking for comfort. Putting her arms around him she asked the million dollar question, “What happened at the brunch, Nate?”
Pulling himself out of her arms he put his hands through his hair. “Marisol I need a drink first. Let’s go inside and have some wine.” The instant Marisol poured the wine and they were relaxed on her old comfy sofa, Nate pulled his tie off and unbuttoned his two top buttons of his shirt then looked directly at her feeling broken and torn. Giving him space and time to calm down she waited until he was ready to open up to her. After his third glass of wine he finally spoke. “Today my family had a big announcement; my brother Jeffrey has decided to run for office since one of the candidates has dropped out due to some scandal with an underage boy, so they asked to run in his place with the major platform being family values – funny huh? Then the topic of same sex marriage was discussed but of course no debate at our dinner table since we are all on the same page – right…? So now I’m faced with my life style being a threat to my brother’s political career.”
“Oh my God Nate, there has to be a way around this. You are not your brother, he can have all the beliefs he wants and try to implement them however he sees fit but you are not him and he shouldn’t be accountable for your way of life just because it’s different from what he stands for. You are your own person.”
“Marisol, I love you but sometimes sweetie you picture the world in rose colors and fairies. Unfortunately politics don’t work that way. He can’t stand for family values and against same sex marriages then parade a gay brother who wants to marry his gay lover. We live in the south sweetie, they will crucify him and he’ll look just as bad as the last guy fooling around with boys.”
“I’m so sorry Nate. I think I’ll go open up another bottle of wine.” Joining him with another glass of wine and refilling his glass she looked at him as he stared at the ceiling. “Nate, what are you thinking?”
“Do you think you have a future with Marco?” he asked never moving his eyes from the view of the ceiling.
“What do you mean? I, we are just fooling around sort of. I know he is going back to Texas and a part of me still wants revenge. Why do you ask?”
“Marry me, we always said by the time you turn thirty if you were still single we would marry.” That is true, they made that pack three years ago when they were both down in the dumps and of course a few pitchers of margaritas later.
“Nate, are you serious right now? What good is that going to do you? It’s not going to change the fact that you are gay nor can you hide forever. Plus I still have a year and a half before I’m thirty.” She grinned sarcastically.
Sitting up enthusiastically like his revelation is going to solve all their problems. “Marisol, think about it we both love each other. I would take care of you and you would be financially set for life. We could both have affairs outside the marriage no one would be the wiser. I can also give you the children you so deserve, we would have the perfect marriage. At least think about?”
“Do you hear yourself? It’s the wine I’m sure. Tomorrow you are going to be fully embarrassed at your proposal; you are just feeling desperate at the moment due to the bomb that was dropped on you today.”
Dropping his head back on the sofa he brought his arm over his eyes trying to cover himself from all the outside pressure. “Promise me you will think about it.”
“Yes, I promise.” She gulped the last of her wine and refilled it. She rested her head against the sofa and drifted off and Marco quickly appeared in her dream escaping her reality taking her to pure ecstasy. It felt so good she didn’t want it to end.
****♥****
Chapter Ten
“Marisol, wake up.” She could hear Marco’s voice but she couldn’t catch up to him. He kept running away from her.
“Marco, stop running don’t do this to me again. Come back. Please come back.” She could feel some one nudging her, why would some one nudge her while he is getting away. “No, stop and leave me alone he is getting away.”
“Marisol, it’s me open up your eyes. I’m not going anywhere babe – I’m right here.”
Slowly she opened up her eyes trying to focus. Adjusting her vision she found Marco standing over her with a frightful look. What’s going on? Feeling dizzy and loopy she rubbed her temples to concentration.
“Hey, you okay? Let me get you some water.” A worried Marco escaped to the kitchen to fetch her water and whatever headache medicine he could find.
“Marco, what are you doing here?” Shaking her head to clear her mind, her memory now coming back to her - damn her dream felt so real. It left her feeling exposed. Sitting up, she asked “Where is Nate?”
Returning back to her side he gave her water and two Tylenol he found in her cabinet. “Here take these and here is some cold water to wash them down. I also let Mace out back.”
Doing as he commanded she looked up at him and saw concern all over his face. “What are you doing here?” she asked again.
Rubbing his forehead as he paced from one end of the sofa to the other before he decided to sit down on her coffee table facing her directly he answered her with hesitation, “Well, I was at the ranch when my phone buzzed with a text. Hoping it was from you but unfortunately it came from Nate.” Pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose he continued, “His message stated that you agreed to marry him and needs me to back off. What’s going on here?”
He sounded so distraught; she wondered if she imagined it? Would he really care if she married Nate? “He drank quite a bit this evening.” Looking over to the other side of the sofa which was now clearly empty - Nate left without waking her. “Oh no, he drove. He was drinking. I have to call him to make sure he made it home safe. He never drinks and drives.”
“Marisol is it true?”
Grabbing her phone from the end table she looked up at him as if he had two heads. “No and yes, he did ask me to marry him but that was just Nate feeling down in the dumps he will be embarrassed in the morning. So no, I didn’t say yes.” Taking her phone she called Nate and left him a message since it went straight to voicemail, demanding he call her as soon as he gets her message. Marco just stared at his feet wondering what to make of all this bullshit and then the words she cried out in her sleep caught him off guard.
“I’m sorry; he bothered you with his nonsense. It’s quite funny and I hope after his morning hangover he will find humor in it.” She spoke nonchalantly like it was no big deal. He looked up at her trying to figure out what the hell is going on. Knowing he wasn’t going to get the answers he wanted. She shifted uncomfortably under his speculative stare and damning Nate for the awkwardness he caused. What was he thinking by sending him that text?
Letting out a heavy sigh, he planted his hand on her knee. “Are you going to be okay? I have to get back to the ranch I left Cisco there with my uncle which could be pretty scary.”
“O-oh, yeah I’m fine just a minor headache nothing a good night sleep can’t cure.”
“Okay, well make sure you lock up and don’t forget Mace is out back.” Rising from the coffee table he looked at her one last time before descending to the door.
Her nerves got the best of her when she abruptly jumped up from the sofa and on impulse or from too much wine she shouted out what she ached to know all these years. “Marco, why did you leave with no word or explanation twelve years ago?” He froze in his spot without turning around. “Was I so meaningless to you to just cast me to the side like an old pair of shoes? The other day you said I wasn’t to blame but you never said who was or why.” The tension rose along with the silence and she feared he wasn’t going to respond. She could see his back muscles and shoulders tense up.
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“Marisol, you are the one who lived with the famous Officer William Braxton surely he could have provided you all the details you needed.” His voice just poured out all his venom which only confused her more.
“Are you saying my father knew why you left? Please turn around and look at me.” She pleaded as her shoulders sagged and her chin lifted as she awaited his response.
He turned around to face her slowly and uncertain with his thoughts causing havoc in his head, he seemed taken aback. “You really don’t know do you?”
“How would I know if I already told you your family shut me out? Any explaining should have come from you. I waited for you for hours in the shed I was worried and scared. I was devastated when you never showed up that day or the day after or the day after that and then the days turned into years.” She stared down at her hands and took a deep breath.
Still glued to his spot he didn’t know how to fix this. He wanted her to know the truth but he also wanted her to hear it from her father. He didn’t want to turn her against the only family she has left. A week ago he would have loved nothing better but now knowing he still loves her he just can’t find it in his heart to hurt her again. “I am so sorry that I hurt you. It wasn’t what I wanted for either of us, I was put into a situation that I needed to protect my family and the only way to do so was by leaving.”
“That makes no sense. Even so, if you would of came to me with whatever it was I would of left with you. I would have gone to hell and back with you. Why did you shut me out?”
“Marisol – if I could have found a way back then to take you with me trust me I would have done so. These past twelve years has been a living hell without you in my life.” He looked defeated as he spun around and silently walked out into the brisk evening air.
She felt lost not knowing what to make out of what just happened. He was angry then distant. Did he really miss her? Did he really have no choice but to leave without her? If so, then why? She still didn’t have all the answers but she knew in heart her father does. Ugh, the men in her life are so complicated - she just can’t seem to figure any of them out.
****♥****
Dragging herself into work after a restless night in bed trying to analyze all that transpired this weekend. First, a night of unforgettable passionate love making, and then a proposal from her best friend who is gay following up with a perplexed Marco showing up because of Nate’s crazy text message looking totally out of sorts and then lastly, she finally gained the courage to ask the questions that haunted her for years. She felt so confused by Marco’s visit last night; he is a pure mystery to her. One moment he looked like he desired her, then he showed traces of concern for her and then he shifted to being aloof and distant. With his constant display of emotions she feels caught in the eye of a tornado – whirling away into a state of dizziness. Then his responses to her questions left her mystified and distressed. There was no commitment between them just great sex and she needed to remember that and keep her feelings in check. She was losing control and the walls she securely built around her were beginning to crumble.
“Good morning Marisol.” Sally’s cheerful voice jolted her out of her thoughts.
“Good morning Sally. How was your weekend?”
“It was busy as usual how about you? Oh, before I forget Mr. Johnson asked for you to stop by his office as soon as you got in.” Sally has a habit of doing fifty things at the same time you need a road map just to keep up with her.
“Okay, thanks we’ll catch up afterwards.” Dropping her bags on her chair in her office Marisol rushed over to see what Mr. Johnson needed so early on a Monday morning and then she remembered the missed call on her phone from him and her nervousness kicked in. Knocking lightly on his door she slowly entered. “Good morning, Mr. Johnson, you wanted to see me?”
Rising from his seat he greeted her. “Good morning, yes come in please take a seat.” She closed the door and they both sat down. She was trying to gage his mood but he was unreadable as usual. “Marisol, the Superintendent called me early Saturday morning and was quite irate. Apparently he received a complaint from the Prescott’s, they informed him you went and harassed Mrs. Prescott at their shop regarding Savannah’s death accusing family members of being an accomplice. Please tell me that this is all some kind of misunderstanding.”
Marisol felt the blood drain from her face and her heart pumping heavily unable to comprehend why Mrs. Prescott would put a complaint about her and going straight to the top no less. “Look, I did go visit Mrs. Prescott at their shop to see how she was holding up.” Taking a deep breath before she plunge in full force. “I did happen to ask her questions around Savannah’s behavior before her death, and I may have suggested that I felt it may not have been a suicide that maybe her nephews knew something about it.” Squeezing her eyes shut waiting her fate.
“Marisol, tell me you did not take it upon yourself to accuse or make assumptions when you have no proof or right for that matter. The police investigation has already declared it a suicide. What in the world were you thinking?” Even in his leveled voice he could not conceal his anger.
“I know I let my impulse get the best of me. In my heart I know there is more to this story and I am going to get to the bottom of it.”
He was livid and shot up from his seat and shouted, “Are you not listening, you will do no such thing. If I hear you ask another teacher or child questions about Savannah you will be fired. Mrs. Prescott was devastated and it caused a big family uproar. Mr. Prescott wanted you fired he threatened to go to the news media. When I received the call from the Superintendent he was outraged and demanded I suspend you immediately. The school board can not receive anymore negative press and your behavior was out of line. The police department did a full investigation and the case is closed.”
Sitting there she was in shell-shock on how this got so out of hand. “I meant no harm. I spoke to her from one mother to another. I too lost a child and I just wanted to reach out to her. My baby girl died of SIDS, in my heart I will never know why her or how it could have happened under my watch and I just feel I owed Mrs. Prescott my thoughts of her daughter. She didn’t commit suicide and when I get these inklings I’m always right. She has a right to know how her daughter died.”
“Do you hear yourself? Has anything I said registered?” He walked to the other side of his office and looked back at her. “You will follow my instructions and you will have no contact what so ever with any of their family members. I am not going to suspend you but you will take this week off and this discussion is now over.”
****♥****
Pulling into her driveway she just sat in her jeep feeling so humiliated wondering how her orderly life got so out of control. Her life lost all gravity and it began to spiral out of its normalcy. Finding the strength to walk inside she could hear Mace with his unconditional love for her trying to break through the door just to get sight of her.
After she had her pity party and slept her morning away with Mace by her side she decided to clear the air with Nate and call him. Before she could say hi, he immediately greeted her. “Hey Babes, still love me?” Oh he knows just how to pull on her heart strings.
“Hey Nate so glad to hear you are still alive. You never called me back you had me worried so no I’m not loving you much today.”
“I’m sorry; I needed time to get over myself.”
“Nate, why did you send Marco that text? What in the hell were you thinking? He showed up at my house last night and I was totally caught off guard.”
“Well, I won’t apologize for sending it. Here is the thing my love, either he is going to step up and be the man he should be to you and make a fucking commitment or he is going to put his tail between his ass and move on. I won’t have him play you, you are not strings on his guitar to pull and make music when he sees fit. And if it’s the latter, then my offer will still stand and I will give you the moon and the stars. What we have may be unconventional but I will shower you with l
ove and do everything I possibly can to make you happy. It’s all in your hands.”
“Nate, I don’t know what to say.” Her voice cracked as the tears poured down her face. Once again she was lost for words.
“Look, you know I have always been here for you and if Marco does turn out to be the White Knight then great. I will be happy because you deserve to be happy. You know I want you to have your happily ever after. Now back to mwah, I’m leaving in the morning for my trip, I’ll definitely check in with you during the week.” Hearing Mace in the back ground he asked, “Is that Mace’s bark? What are you doing home?”
“Well, I was asked to take a mandatory vacation. Oh Nate, I royally screwed up this time. I don’t know what is wrong with me.”
“What happened? Don’t tell me this involves Savannah?”
“BINGO…. I went to see her mom and tried to convince her it wasn’t suicide and kind of accused her nephews of maybe knowing something.”
“No, tell me you did not do that? Marisol, you need to keep that impulsion of yours in check.”
“I know. I never felt as humiliated as I did today. I couldn’t even tell Sally, I was so embarrassed. It came straight from the superintendent.”
“I hate to leave you like this. Do you want me to cancel my trip?”
“Are you insane? You and Lucas deserve this time especially now. You took two steps forward and now 10 steps back. Poor Lucas.”
After giving a heavy sigh Nate felt his chest tightened and had to shake it off so he can breathe properly. “I haven’t shared much of Sunday’s discussions yet. I want us to have a relaxed vacation first.”
“Well don’t keep him in the dark; he will want to share your pain with you. You owe him that, the good the bad and the indifference. Isn’t that what love is all about sharing it all.”
“Okay, I have to go you are taking me to the deep end and I don’t have my life vest on.”
“Drama Queen. I’ll call you later and… Nate?”