by R. E. Butler
Their home was packed. Males and females milled around the kitchen and family room, spilling out onto the porch and large backyard. Jason excused himself and went out the back door. Logan was speaking to Cades about the young wolves who had helped with the clearing. Jenna’s thoughts were suddenly consumed with the heady scent of red meat. Almost without realizing it, she walked away from Logan, through the kitchen, and out onto the back porch, where Jason now manned four grills.
Logan snagged her hand with an annoyed sound. She licked her lips as she watched Jason turn over several steaks with tongs.
“You guys hungry? There’s tons of food inside, too.” Jason said, picking up a plate. “How rare do you want it, Jenna?”
“Really rare,” she said.
Jason lifted a steak and placed it on the plate, handing it to her. Logan led her back into the house and sat down on the couch in the family room, pulling her into his lap. He handed her a fork and knife, but she ignored them, picking the hot steak up in her fingers and taking a bite.
“Oh, yum,” she said with a satisfied groan.
“Hey, guys,” a tall, dark-skinned man said, coming into the room.
Logan said, “Jenna, this is my friend Teller. Teller, this is my mate, Jenna.”
Teller greeted Jenna. She said hello absently, taking another bite of steak. As she chewed, she cast her eyes up at the tall man warily. Is he going to steal my food? Frowning at the sudden strange thought, she shook it away and concentrated on the steak while Logan and Teller talked about locating Jasper.
“I have her gown from the hospital. It’s sealed up in a bag with the iron shackles they used, too. Come by tomorrow and I’ll give them to you.”
“Sounds good,” Teller said. “Shouldn’t be too hard to find them from the stuff that you have.”
“I appreciate your help.”
Teller nodded. “It’s what I do.”
Jenna was frustrated. The steak was far too cooked for her liking. She had specifically said rare, and this was practically well-done. Climbing from Logan’s lap, she stormed through the house.
Jason looked surprised when she tossed the steak into the nearby trash can and asked for another one.
“I said rare, and that was way too done.”
Jason gave her a strange look, and she tensed. She had the weirdest feeling that he was sizing her up. She felt Logan come behind her and settle his hand on her shoulder. Feeling claustrophobic, she shook it off.
Even though he looked over her head at Logan, Jason turned the handle of the tongs over to her and gestured towards the grills. Selecting an uncooked thick steak from a tray, she placed it on an empty section of one grill. She was aware that silence had settled on the deck around them, but she didn’t care. She was starving and the only thing she could think about was having a delicious, juicy steak, not the dried-out piece of shoe-leather that Jason had tried to pass off to her. Alpha indeed! He needed his eyes checked.
Satisfied with the steak, she pulled it from the grill and set it on a clean plate, leaving the tongs hanging from a handle on one grill and storming into the kitchen. Her thoughts tumbled quickly in her mind, feeling foreign but also right.
Eat. Eat quickly before someone steals it. Guard it. Watch your back.
She pressed her back into a corner of the kitchen so she could make sure that no one snuck up on her and stole her food. After assuring herself that no one had designs on her meal, she took a bite of steak. Hot juice splashed on her tongue as she chewed on the delectable chunk, swallowing and snatching another piece between her teeth. She’d never tasted anything so perfect in her life.
A snarl escaped her lips when a shadow passed over her. She pressed tighter into the corner.
“Jenna? What’s going on?” Logan asked.
“I wanted a rare steak.” She put the steak on the plate and scowled at him.
Logan moved closer and lowered his voice. “Okay, but that’s no reason to be rude to my alpha in front of the entire pack. You embarrassed me, Jenna. I would never act like that in front of your family.”
A small part of her understood that her actions had been wrong, but the larger part of her was snarling in hunger, and she could only repeat herself.
“I said rare, Logan. Rare! See? This is what I wanted.”
“Jenna, that’s not rare, it’s raw!” Logan’s shocked voice made Jenna look at the plate again. Her fingers moved through the juice on the plate, which was very red. Blood red. Delicious, something whispered inside her. Her stomach heaved at the thought of consuming raw meat, and she dropped the plate, slapped her hand over her mouth, and raced for the bathroom.
Kneeling in from of the toilet, she threw up, crying out at the intensity of it. Someone gathered her hair away from her face while she choked and vomited, and she knew it was Logan, offering comfort even though he had to think she was nuts. She knew now that the steak had been raw, and even though it had tasted delicious to her, her mind couldn’t get over the rawness of it. She shouldn’t want to eat raw steak, that wasn’t normal.
A cool, wet cloth wiped across her mouth when she was finished being sick, and she flushed the toilet, leaning back against the wall with a soft sob. Her stomach hurt, her throat burned, and shame filled her.
“Logan, what’s wrong with me?” She started to shiver uncontrollably.
“I don’t know, baby. Do you want me to take you home?”
She shook her head. “You need to shift and hunt, and we’re supposed to announce our mating.”
“The only thing that matters to me is you. If you’re not feeling right, then I’ll take you home. I can shift and run around in the backyard and you can rest. It’s fine, I swear.”
Get a hold of yourself, Jenna!
She pushed up from the floor and stood with trembling knees, leaning against the counter. Looking into the mirror, she took in a quick breath, sure that she’d seen her silver eyes turn amber for a brief moment. Shaking her head, she turned on the faucet and splashed cold water on her face, rinsing out her mouth. Logan opened a medicine cabinet and handed her a bottle of mouthwash, which she used until her mouth felt clean.
When she’d turned off the water and dried her face and hands, she felt an overwhelming sense of sorrow settle on her, and she threw herself into Logan’s arms and hugged him tight.
“I’m so sorry, Logan. I don’t know what’s the matter with me. I’ll apologize to Jason and whoever else you want me to.” She chewed on her lip, her hands fisting in the back of his shirt. “I feel like my brain’s been taken over by someone else. You know I actually thought that Teller might steal my steak? How crazy is that?”
Logan, who had been rocking her back and forth gently, went very still, and she looked up at him, noticing how confused and worried he looked. If Logan was worried, and he was a big, strong wolf, then she should probably be worried, too.
“You must think I’m nuts.”
Fear hit her hard. Would Logan leave her? Would the pack reject their mating because she’d clearly lost her marbles?
No! She fought against the irrational emotions that were rolling through her like the tide. They were truemates, bonded together by blood, and Logan wouldn’t abandon her, even if she was having some kind of emotional meltdown.
“Of course I don’t, baby. But you have to talk to me.” He pushed her away gently and cupped her face with his large, warm hands. “I’m right here, Jenna. You can trust me.”
“I know I can,” she said, gripping his wrists with her hands and holding on. He felt like a lifeline, like the only sane thing in her whole world. “I can’t explain it, really. I just don’t feel like myself.”
“Then we’ll leave. Nothing about tonight changes what we are. You’re my truemate and I’m yours. I’ll shift at home and you can rest. I don’t mind. You have to let me take care of you, Jenna.”
She worried her bottom lip with her teeth. He was so sincere. No matter what other strange emotions she was feeling, she knew without a doubt that
Logan cared about her and would never walk away from her. She felt selfish for letting such strange emotions cloud her thoughts and alter her behavior. It was a special night, and she didn’t want to let him down.
Forcing the emotions away, she willed herself to calm down. This was their mating night, and after he went hunting with his pack, he would take her home and they would make love. She wanted this night to go on as planned.
Squaring her shoulders, she wiped away any traces of the strange emotions from her face and plastered a smile on her lips.
“I’m ready to be yours, Logan. I don’t want to go home yet. I want you to hunt and then come back to me and take me home.”
The frown on his face, complete with drawn brows, told her that he didn’t really believe she was fine, but she continued to smile, hoping he would believe her. She would feel terrible if he left with her now after she’d clearly caused a scene and embarrassed him.
“It’s just a few hours, Logan.” She reached up and cupped his face, stroking her thumb across the bow of his mouth. “I’m fine now, I swear.”
Liar, liar.
His eyes narrowed, but she remained smiling like an idiot, and after a few tense moments, he brushed his lips against hers with a sigh. “If you start to feel badly again, let me know and I’ll take you home. You’re the most important thing to me, Jenna, you have to know that.”
“I do.” She reached past him and opened the bathroom door.
He led her out of the bathroom and back into the kitchen, where only the top-ranked and their mates remained. A blush heated Jenna’s cheeks as she remembered her harsh words to Jason. If she could just figure out what was causing her to act so strangely.
The group looked at her, and when she met their eyes she didn’t see recrimination or displeasure, only concern. These were good people and she’d acted like a bull in a china shop.
Clearing her throat, she said, “I’m sorry for snapping at you, Jason, and for my behavior. It was inappropriate and disrespectful, and I have no excuse for it.”
“Apology accepted and entirely forgiven, Jenna. If you’re not feeling well, we can postpone the announcement until the next full moon.”
“No, I’d like to do it tonight.” She looked up at Logan as he stood next to her, one arm around her protectively. He smiled at her, but his eyes were tight with worry.
“Okay. Let’s head out, the pack is waiting,” Jason said.
“Jenna,” Logan said, as the group moved out of the kitchen and out on the porch.
Pressing her fingertip to his lips she said, “I’m fine, Logan. I want to be your mate tonight.”
“You already are. This announcement doesn’t change anything about us. I can just take you home and we can be alone.”
Irritation flashed through her, but she tamped it down. “Please,” was all she said and he shook his head with a sigh and held open the back door.
The walk to the full moon meeting place didn’t take more than a few minutes, as they followed the well-worn path. The pack surrounded the clearing where the bonfire burned brightly. It was laid with enough wood to last through the night.
Jason and Cades stepped over a ring of rocks around the bonfire. The pack grew quiet. Jason motioned for them to come forward; Logan took her hand and they walked to the edge of the stones and then turned to face each other. She knew that if she was also a wolf, they would have a real bonding ceremony and she would be inducted into the pack as a member. But as she was a fairy, they were simply recognizing her as Logan’s mate and an honorary member of the pack.
“It is not written anywhere that wolves can only find their truemates within the breed. When a wolf finds a truemate, that mate is accepted into the pack as a treasured member, to be protected and revered. If any were to go against the mate, to drive the mate away or cause the mate harm, the wrath of the alphas would come down on them without mercy. Wolf mates are sacred, and to be treated with the utmost respect.”
Jenna was looking at Jason as he spoke, but she could feel Logan watching her, could almost taste his worry for her. It was making her antsy. She shifted her weight from one foot to the other, and pain shot up her leg, like an electric jolt. She winced automatically and Logan’s hand tightened against hers. Glancing down, she didn’t see anything wrong, but her right knee began to throb and ache.
Her ears buzzed and she was aware that Jason was talking, but she couldn’t hear him clearly. She looked at him and saw his mouth moving but only caught snatches of his words. He was asking the pack about her. She heard howling, distant and echoing, and then Logan pulled her into his arms and kissed her. More howling occurred and she struggled to hear, but it felt as if her ears were plugged up.
When the kiss was over, Logan pulled off his shirt, handed it to her and continued to undress. She shook her head, wondering what would cause her to go suddenly deaf, when another jolt shook her left leg. The throbbing in her right knee moved both up and down, to surround her ankle like a shackle and to cup her hip like a hot hand. As quickly as her right leg was throbbing, her left leg began to throb and ache, as the little jolts and pains moved up her body.
Her eyes watered as the pain moved upwards, touching each of her ribs one by one, making them feel as if they were being squeezed in a vise. Logan kissed her, oblivious to her pain as he got ready to shift, and slipped down to the ground. Her fingers curled like claws, painful and rigid, as Logan’s huge body shifted into his wolf form: a large, dark gray wolf.
He nuzzled her knee and gazed up at her, his head cocked to the side as if studying her.
Her ears began to clear some and she heard Cades ask if she was ready to go back to the house.
Through gritted teeth, Jenna managed, “Have a good hunt, Logan,” and turned to follow Cades.
Logan barked at her but she didn’t turn back, trudging after Cades with every ounce of willpower she had. If she could just make it back to the house, she could sit down and figure out why her bones felt like they were trying to jump out of her skin. Her gums ached and a headache formed between her eyes as her vision dimmed and then brightened suddenly. She could see things so clearly and sharply, but in strange colors.
Why hadn’t she let Logan take her home? She needed him now and he was off hunting and wouldn’t be back for hours.
She managed to make it into the kitchen before her spine made several snapping sounds and she fell to the floor, screaming.
Just as Cades and the other mates rushed to her aid, Jenna’s hearing cleared and sharpened intensely.
“Jenna?” Cades said, putting her hand on Jenna’s skin.
“Stop screaming!” Jenna howled, slapping her hands over her ears. Her skin was sensitive, prickling like needles were being driven into her flesh. Her bones throbbed and her muscles twitched.
“Is she shifting?” Shyne asked, in a voice that was still too loud. In the strange mixed colors of her vision, Jenna could see that Shyne, Karly, and Cades were kneeling around her.
Cades looked up and shouted, “Get Logan, now!”
Jenna moaned as the sound intensified in her ears.
“Help me,” Jenna choked out, sobs shaking her body as her limbs twitched and her eyes rolled back in her head.
“We’ve got you. Let’s get you to the couch, sweetie,” Cades said, and Jenna felt hands sliding under her arms and she was lifted up. The three women helped pull her over to the couch, apologizing as each step made her body jar painfully. Easing her down onto the couch, Cades knelt in front of her and picked up her hand. “Logan’s on his way, just hold on.”
Karly came into the family room with a cool, wet cloth and pressed it lightly to Jenna’s forehead. Shyne paced nearby, wringing her hands.
Jenna curled into herself, leaning against the arm of the couch for support, her muscles twitching as throbbing pain coursed through her body. When would this nightmare end?
She had no concept of time as the three women moved around her, replacing the wet cloth, offering her cool drinks and food
, speaking in low tones so they wouldn’t hurt her sensitive ears.
She wished she hadn’t sent Logan away. She wanted him by her side, because even in the haze of her pain she knew that he would help her. As her hands clenched against her will, her knuckles cracking loudly, she closed her eyes and prayed he would get to her soon.
Chapter 8
Logan watched Jenna turn away with his clothes in her hands, her shoulders hunched and her movements stiff. Something was definitely wrong with her. He barked sharply, but she didn’t turn around to look at him. Was she angry with him?
He’d been so surprised by her behavior at Jason’s home. It had embarrassed him when she snapped at his alpha about his cooking skills, but he shouldn’t have shamed her like that. Clearly she wasn’t feeling like herself, and she’d needed his support, not his annoyance.
He watched her until she disappeared into the trees, following the other mates and the she-wolves who were going to watch them while the others hunted. If she needed him, she would call for him, wouldn’t she? He just wasn’t sure, and the indecision tore at him.
Michael barked at him, and Logan turned away and padded over to where he, Jason, and Linus were waiting. Before Bo had mated the she-wolf Reika, Bo had hunted with them as well, but now he hunted with his wife. Their small group headed deeper into the woods to find something to hunt. The wolves’ territory was filled with plenty to hunt, from field mice and rabbits to deer, and in the hotter summer months, there was a stream with fish that were fun to chase.
He tried to focus his thoughts on the hunt, to support his friends and do what the wolf in him wanted to do every full moon — let loose and chase prey — but he couldn’t stop thinking about Jenna. The further away from her he got, the worse he felt, and even his wolf, who had been anxious for a good hunt, wanted to go back to their mate.
He stopped and barked to his friends, just as a low, warning howl came in the distance. It was the sound of a she-wolf calling for help! Without a glance back at his friends, Logan bolted towards the howling she-wolf, regret filling his mind. Had something happened to Jenna? Was she okay? He would never get over abandoning her when he’d known in his heart that something was wrong.