by Robyn Grady
Unfortunately she could do little about the physical effects of her pregnancy…the appetite, the nausea, the chronic fatigue, which this week had been merciless. At the boutique, she took naps in the back room, telling Tracey that a bug was responsible for her lack of energy. From the worried slant of Tracey’s brows, she knew her assistant wasn’t convinced.
When the time was right Eden would tell her friend. She needed to tell the father of her baby the good news first, but she wasn’t ready for that confrontation yet.
When the home test had proved positive, she’d had her GP confirm the result. But she’d suffered some bleeding this last week, the twelfth gestational week, and a scan had been scheduled in a couple of days to give her the all-clear. When she saw her baby—knew that he or she was truly safe—then, and only then, would she let Devlin know he would soon be a father. What bad luck that she and Devlin should happen to be at the same hotel on the same night.
Unless…
‘You didn’t answer my question,’ she said as he stopped before a bench and set her carefully down to sit. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Meeting a friend for dinner in the ground-floor restaurant. You?’
‘Art exhibition,’ she replied, thinking he sounded sincere. That he hadn’t followed her and mustn’t know anything about her secret. But then why would he? She and Sabrina were the only ones who knew he was the father and Sabrina would never betray her trust. She’d promised not to tell.
Lowering down beside her, he quizzed her eyes. ‘This exhibition must be important to drag yourself out when you’re at death’s door.’
‘Zack Perry, the artist, is a good friend.’
He cocked a curious brow. ‘I see.’
‘And I’m not on death’s door. I’m simply—’
‘I know, I know. You’re tired.’ But he looked as convinced by her excuse as Tracey had been this past week. ‘Would you like some water?’
‘I would like to go home.’
She went to stand but his hand on her shoulder eased her back down.
‘Sit for a while before you go rushing off.’
‘I’m not sick,’ she insisted. Not in the way he thought.
He slid a sizzling glance down her dress and legs then back up. Damn the man, she was instantly on fire.
One dark eyebrow lifted. ‘I must say, you don’t look as though you’re fading away.’
She tucked her chin in. Was her weight gain that obvious? Devlin, on the other hand, looked in prime condition—mouth-watering in pressed dark trousers, a casual custom-made jacket and open-necked shirt. He looked so good, smelled so fine, heaven help her, she had to fight the urge to snuggle back into those wholly masculine arms.
‘How’s your foot?’
His question broke her trance and she cleared her throat.
‘Better, thanks.’ And, now he was here, she had to ask. ‘I see you were in Monaco.’
His eyes narrowed on hers.
Yes, that’s right, her eyes said back. I saw the photograph of you with your arm around Miss Mammary of Monte Carlo. From his perceptive grin he’d also guessed the photo had turned her green.
‘I dropped in for a couple of days,’ he explained.
Her own smile was tight. ‘Those short stints seem to suit you.’
His mouth hooked up higher, then, angling more towards her, he rested his arm along the back of the bench. ‘Have you done any globe-trotting recently?’
‘I postponed a trip to LA,’ she admitted.
Not only did the thought of jet lag make her shudder, no matter how much her doctor assured her, she wouldn’t fly while she was pregnant. She wondered what Devlin’s opinion on the subject would be.
But he didn’t appear to have anything remotely cautious on his mind. His gaze was roaming her face as if he were remembering the feel of her skin, the way she’d arched longingly beneath him and quivered whenever his warm, giving mouth had trailed down her neck.
‘Did you book in for those climbing lessons?’ he asked as his deliberate gaze skimmed her jaw.
She inhaled, determined to contain her dangerous thoughts, even if he wasn’t. ‘I’ve put them on hold too.’
Permanent hold. She was responsible for another life. She had to look after herself so she could look after her baby. Would Devlin change any aspect of his lifestyle when he found out that he was going to be a dad? Would he feel the mantle of responsibility as intensely as she did?
An image flashed to mind—Devlin stuck in the millennium’s worst blizzard atop some distant godforsaken mountain.
Squirming, she curled some hair behind her ear.
What if he wanted to tone down his adventures for the sake of his unborn child? Didn’t he deserve the opportunity to make that kind of decision earlier rather than later? Maybe she should find the courage to tell him now before the scan.
Maybe he would thank her.
Willing her heartbeat to slow, she dropped her gaze. She didn’t want to see his reaction if it wasn’t good.
‘Devlin, I need to tell you—’
‘Don’t worry.’ His arm slid away from the bench’s back railing.
Her gaze lifted to study his implacable expression. ‘Don’t worry about what?’
‘I’m not keeping you out here to take advantage of the situation.’
Her brows lifted. Devlin had climbed back on the dating pony mere days after they’d said goodbye again. On the island, he’d taken his best shot, hoping to keep her in his bed. But clearly he wouldn’t be gutted if he never saw her again.
No matter how much her heart begged her to offer him her lips and claim the kiss she’d been dreaming of, it would mean little to him other than a means to an end. A way to extend the affair. As she’d made it clear before, she couldn’t bring herself to be anyone’s mistress. Not even Devlin Stone’s. Her mind was set and nothing would sway her.
‘I’m not worried, Devlin.’ Not about that.
‘Good,’ he said emphatically. ‘Because the more I think about it, the more I realise you were right. We connected on the island, connected in a big way. But it couldn’t last for ever.’
‘No.’ It most certainly couldn’t.
His smile almost reached his eyes. ‘Even if I have to admit now that I still want you.’ His shoulder rolled back. ‘We are compatible that way.’
Despite her mindset, she found her wan smile matched his. ‘Yes.’ They definitely were.
But wait. Had he moved closer? Her skin was beginning to heat again in a dreadfully pleasant way, and her already full breasts were growing heavier by the second.
As their eyes locked more he seemed to read her thoughts and reassured her in that rumbling sexy drawl that never failed to entice, ‘Relax, Eden. Just because I want to hold you, doesn’t mean I will.’
‘You have no intention of kissing me?’
His lidded gaze skimmed her lips and his speculation turned into a sexy smile. ‘I didn’t until a second ago.’
She hated herself for doing nothing when his hand scooped around her neck and brought her close. Worse, she submitted when he captured her mouth with his. She surrendered totally and she couldn’t deny the reason why. A subversive part of her was celebrating, and as it rejoiced the ache of want and wonder only grew.
Accepting his kiss now felt like the most natural and needful thing she’d ever done.
His thumb circled behind her ear and as his breathing deepened her lips parted more. Her nerve-endings burned with awareness when his other hand cupped her jaw, his hot fingers fanning over her temple, through her hair as a powerful, wonderful pressure built low in her belly.
This was how she was born to feel. He was who she was born to love.
When he softly broke the kiss, his lips stayed close to brush back and forth over hers. She felt his grin, the rumble in his chest.
‘Eden, love, you could make a man give up his religion.’
A mighty wave of emotion picked her up then flung her back down.
&n
bsp; This was madness. She must tell him now, this minute. Maybe here, away from everything and everyone, a miracle would happen. A thunderbolt might streak out of the night sky and hit him with the concrete knowledge that he was, in fact, in love with her and, on top of that, he was thrilled by the news that they would soon be parents together.
Miracles did happen, right?
She filled her lungs and prayed the right words would come. ‘Devlin, please listen to me carefully. I need to tell you something important.’
The consuming fire in his eyes flickered and dimmed before he drew away. ‘I know the rules. I didn’t break them.’ He grinned crookedly. ‘Only bent them a little. We’re agreed. We want different things. That won’t change.’
She shook her head. He was on the wrong track. ‘Sometimes things aren’t so black and white.’
His gaze intensified. ‘Are you saying you want me to kiss you again?’
‘I’m saying…Devlin, I’m pregnant.’
He blinked once, slowly. ‘Pregnant. With…a baby?’
Her smile was lame. ‘I certainly hope so.’
‘My baby.’
She nodded.
The confusion on his face gradually changed to a fearsome darkness. Eyes blazing, he shoved to his feet. ‘And you hadn’t thought to pick up the phone and do something totally off the wall like let me know?’
Eden bit her lip. So much for the news going down well.
She reached for him, to calm him and balance herself. ‘Devlin, I wanted to be sure.’
‘As far as I know you’re either pregnant or you’re not.’
It wasn’t that simple.
‘The tests are positive. I have all the symptoms.’
But there was more. She needed to tell him about her concerns and the scan set for Saturday. She’d been worried, but alongside the constant churn of anxiety came a profound sense of purpose. This baby was meant to be, and, no matter how Devlin took the news, as long as her child was healthy, that blessing would be more than enough.
He clapped his outer thighs and declared, ‘Well, this changes everything.’
Her dread turned to the barest shimmer of hope. ‘What do you mean?’
‘It changes you and me.’
Eden chanced a tiny smile. Did he mean he didn’t need to contain his feelings any more? Was that thunderbolt about to strike? Given the fact he hadn’t done anything jerk-worthy like say the baby couldn’t be his or I’m not ready for this, she was more than willing to listen.
She dropped her chin. ‘This changes us how?’
He sat down, scrubbed his jaw and scrubbed it again. ‘I think we need to…’ He blew out a quick breath. ‘Well, I think we should probably get married.’
Her heart seemed to stop at the same time a frightening numbness consumed her body.
He’d asked her to marry him. She’d fantasised about a proposal since their first date three years ago. But in her daydreams he’d looked confident, happy, laughing with joy and relief when she cried out, Yes, of course I’ll marry you!
He didn’t look happy now. His mouth was tight, his jaw too, and a sheen of perspiration had broken on his hairline. And what kind of a proposal was that anyway?
I think we should probably get married.
As an afterthought he took her hand. ‘Next month. What do you think?’
Her short laugh was devoid of humour. ‘I think you’d rather paint fences standing on one leg for the rest of your life than marry me.’
He dropped her hand. ‘Eden, I’m serious.’
‘So am I.’
He shot to his feet again, his braced stance almost threatening. She’d never seen him so agitated. ‘Isn’t this what you wanted? A diamond ring. A white dress. We’ll buy them tomorrow. We’ll get married and—’
‘Regret it for the rest of our lives.’
His eyes turned to cool, glittering stone. ‘We’re good together. We could make a marriage work.’
He made it sound as if he’d be chained in a quarry for the rest of his days. Worse, he couldn’t see how his I’ll-sacrifice-myself-for-the-sake-of-our-child reaction hurt her.
He’d been right. They were black and white. He shunned the idea of settling down while she looked forward to it. When would she learn she could never win Devlin’s heart? He was unattainable.
Unwinnable.
Devlin had said his mother should have seen the writing on the wall. Deep down, in a dark place he couldn’t bear to look, didn’t he pray that she would see the same warning and take heed now? If they married, he would grow to resent it, resent her, and possibly even their child. She couldn’t have that. She simply couldn’t.
She swallowed against a lump of throbbing emotion. ‘You care about me, Devlin?’
His nostrils flared. ‘Of course I do.’
If she needed to beg, she would.
‘Then, please,’ please, ‘don’t ask me again. Let this go.’
She dragged herself to her feet and headed for the exit. His hand on her arm urged her back around.
His chin kicked up. ‘You’re carrying my child. A child needs his father.’
‘I would never stop you from seeing the baby. He’ll know we both love him. He doesn’t need to grow up knowing that—’
She dropped her head as the raw, inescapable truth hit her squarely in the chest and a sob almost escaped. Devlin didn’t love her, and if he didn’t now he never would, married or not.
‘I would never be unfaithful,’ he promised, getting to his feet, ‘if that’s what’s worrying you.’
A tear slid down her cheek. ‘And that’s supposed to be a consolation?’
‘For God’s sake,’ he growled before he inhaled and gathered himself. ‘Eden, what do you want from me?’
‘The only thing you can’t give.’
His pupils dilated as if an idea had struck. He brought her close. ‘Eden, I—’
Heat blazed in her cheeks and she tore free. ‘Don’t you dare lie to me.’ Don’t dare tell me that you love me now. ‘I deserve better than that.’
His face hardened to a deathly calm. ‘Think of our child.’
‘I am.’ She was also thinking about another child, a little boy who’d grown up not believing in love. She would not be responsible for passing on that kind of legacy.
‘Life isn’t a fairy tale,’ he said.
‘No. Life is about making choices.’
She’d had the choice not to go away with him but she’d refused to acknowledge it. Now she would make the right choice even if it meant her heart was ripped out.
He ran a hand through his hair and sized her up for a long, tense moment. ‘I’ll take you home.’
‘You have a dinner date.’
‘I’ll cancel.’
‘Don’t bother.’
He huffed out a jaded laugh. ‘You really think I’m a first-class bastard, don’t you?’
‘I don’t think that at all. I believe one day you’ll understand precisely how I feel.’
You’ll let yourself fall in love, it just won’t be with me.
He seemed to think that through before taking her arm. ‘We’re going home.’
‘No.’
She knew from old—he’d give up eventually.
As she stood her ground he dragged a hand down his face, holding his palm over his mouth before shucking back his shoulders. ‘Then let me see that you get a cab.’
Her stomach knotted. He looked so…tormented.
Wanting to cry, she cupped his jaw and tried to reassure him. ‘It’s okay, Devlin. Really it is.’
As long as their child was healthy, that was all that mattered.
‘It’s not okay.’ His gaze lowered to her waist before he linked his arm through hers and ushered her resolutely to the door. ‘But you can bet I’ll find a way to make sure it ends up that way.’
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
‘THIS shouldn’t take long, mate. We’ll be on the golf course by ten.’
Staring out of the window of N
ate’s Alpha Romeo, Devlin dragged himself back from his thoughts. Thoughts of Eden. Thoughts of their unborn child. He’d barely slept or eaten these past days for thinking, then thinking more.
Now he turned his attention from suburban weatherboards and gum trees to his brother. ‘I wish you’d told me sooner you weren’t feeling well.’
Nate had collected him early for their scheduled golf game, explaining that his doctor had ordered a test relating to stomach problems he’d experienced lately.
Speeding up, Nate beat a red light. ‘The GP doesn’t think it’s anything serious. This scan’ll just rule out some possibilities.’ He flicked over a smile before turning into a medical centre car park. ‘I appreciate you coming along.’
‘Amazing what technology can do these days.’ Devlin snapped his seat belt as Nate swung into a park. ‘They use ultrasounds for pregnancies too, you know.’
‘Yeah. I know.’ Nate shut down the engine, concentrated on the steering wheel for a deliberative moment, then turned a considering eye on his brother. ‘Look, Devlin, if you want to talk anything over…’
Devlin’s jaw clenched. ‘You know all there is to know.’ Opening the door, he swung one long leg out. ‘I’m going to be a father and the mother has the good sense to refuse my marriage proposal.’
Nate exhaled. ‘It sure can be tricky.’
‘What’s that?’
Nate pinned him with a knowing look. ‘Love.’
Devlin manoeuvred out of the car while Nate did the same. ‘Do me a favour. Don’t talk to me about the L word.’ He shut the door harder than necessary. ‘I’m not cut out for it.’
‘That’s what I thought too, until I found the right one.’ Watching the traffic, they crossed the car park towards the centre’s doors. ‘Just hope one day I’ll talk her into marrying me.’
Devlin stopped dead and a lime-green Mini beeped its horn and swerved around him. ‘You proposed to Sabrina?’
‘Over a quiet romantic dinner the other night. She said she’s not ready.’
Entering the building’s air-conditioned cool, Devlin blew out a breath. ‘The Stone brothers seem to be striking out lately.’
‘Sabrina’s just scared.’ He shrugged one shoulder. ‘You know, about committing.’