I took a deep breath as I considered. “Right now, things are on track. I know it seems like he’s dying, but that’s just the chemotherapy.”
“It didn’t make him this sick before when I saw him,” she pointed out.
“Whenever you’ve visited, your father has done everything he possibly could to make sure you didn’t see how sick he was. Now, it’s a little harder. Part of it is how he looks, I think. It’s difficult to believe he’s feeling fine when his hair and eyebrows are gone and his fingernails are falling off. But believe me, things are going a lot easier for him now that he knows what to expect.”
She nodded, her lips pursed. “If things were really bad, you would tell me, wouldn’t you?”
“I would.” I didn’t even have to consider the answer. “He’s your father. I’m not going to keep anything important from you. Unless he were to say, ‘don’t tell Emma,’ but I don’t think he’s going to do that.”
“You’re right. I’m acting paranoid.” She bit her thumb as she stared out the window. “I haven’t been spending enough time with him.”
“Neil doesn’t want you to put your life on hold to worry about him. He’s told you that.” I’m sure that wouldn’t lessen her feeling of regret if he did die and she perceived herself as wasting time she could have spent with him.
“What would you do, were you in my shoes?”
What.
“Um,” I began, super eloquently. “Is that rhetorical?”
“No.” She shook her head firmly. “I have no experience with this. I don’t know what I should be doing.”
Had Emma really just asked me for advice?
“Well, he did mention that you’re not calling as often as you used to,” I ventured. “He knows you’re busy, but maybe if you just gave him a call now and then.”
“I’m always worried I’m going to wake him up or bother him,” she admitted.
“Well, I’m the one usually answering his phone lately.” Maybe that was the problem. Maybe she was afraid she’d get roped into a conversation with me. “Do you want me to just tell you if he’s sleeping or having a bad day?”
“I suppose,” she said cautiously.
“I’m not going to use it as an excuse to keep you from your dad.” I paused. “Is that... were you worried about that?”
“I know you’re a good person.” She sounded like she was trying to convince herself. “But I don’t really know you.”
“And all that shit happened with Elizabeth. Look, you don’t have to trust me. I know I’m not going to do anything shady to you. Eventually you’ll know that, too.”
“It’s not that I think you’re going to maliciously attack me or keep my father from me. It’s only... your actions at the magazine seemed suspect. And my mom...”
“Hates me,” I finished for her. “It’s not a secret. And I don’t like her very much either, so we’re on equal footing.”
“She’s not a fan.” Emma’s eyes flared wide as she rolled them.
“I don’t have any contact with her, really. She calls for Neil and I give him the phone—” My heart lurched. Emma’s chin tilted slightly, and her eyes narrowed. I think we’d landed on the same conclusion at the same time. But I had to be sure. “Is that why you haven’t been calling or coming over so much? Did your mom say something?”
“Oh, this is quite uncomfortable, isn’t it?” Emma made a popping sound with her lips. “She... may have hinted to me that you were not wanting people to come around.”
“That’s silly. She could have come over any time she liked. She just had to ask Neil.” Silence hung between us a moment. Too quickly I added, “I literally only say ‘hello’ and ‘I’ll go and get him’ to her,” and I sounded defensive even to myself. But I’d never tried to prevent Neil from speaking to Valerie, and I resented that she’d given that impression to her daughter.
I tried again. “Actually, Emma... I really like having you at the house. It makes it feel less lonely.”
“I thought I would be intruding.”
“Not at all.” My stomach roiled at the thought that I’d somehow kept her from her father when she’d wanted to be close to him.
And I was furious at Valerie for even planting that suggestion in the first place. But she was Emma’s mother, so I wasn’t about to address it. I didn’t like feeling as though I had to compete with another woman. It was so... tacky and daytime soap opera. While a part of me acknowledged that sometimes, people just didn’t get along and it had nothing to do with any sense of jealousy, I wasn’t going to try and fool myself into thinking that was the case here.
I was enormously threatened by Valerie.
“I’m sorry, I should have given you the benefit of the doubt.” Emma shook her head. “And I don’t mean to drag down our whole day. I promise I will call dad more often.”
Amazingly, my thoughts of Valerie and how mad I was at her faded away as Emma and I had a few vegan friendly beers— her convictions didn’t extend to yeast— and we chatted. Mostly about Neil. Emma told me all about how much he spoiled her as she’d grown up. He’d protected her, too. The only one of his girlfriends besides me that Emma had ever met was Elizabeth.
“I know he must have been seeing women but he didn’t introduce me to anyone until he was serious, and that was Elizabeth.” Emma dug into a plate of pumpkin ravioli made with soy cheese and eggless pasta. “So, I take it you guys are pretty serious.”
“He didn’t mean for us to meet, though,” I reminded her. Although I hated to. It had been the single most embarrassing moment of my life. “I mean, obviously we would have met at Christmas, since I ended up over here.”
She tilted her head as she examined my plate of hot and sour tofu with grilled asparagus. “You could have ordered a burger, you know. I wouldn’t have been offended.”
“I’m actually really liking the whole vegan thing. I think it’s... well, it’s not helping me lose weight, because all I’ve been doing is sitting around. But it’s keeping me from gaining too much.” I lifted a chunk of asparagus with my fork. “So, thank you. I never would have even thought of trying it out on my own.”
“Oh. Well... You’re welcome.” She looked pleased with herself as she took another bite.
After lunch, and a dessert round of beer, we took a fairly light-headed shopping trip. I let Emma show me the best stores, though our fashion tastes were somewhat different. And I did spend some of Neil’s money. Not a lot of it, but some of it.
While we browsed at a store called Koh Samui, Emma told me a bit about her relationship with Michael.
“I know dad hates him.” Emma held up a sheer black blouse and considered it. “Has he ever mentioned why?”
“Nothing specific. Basically he’s having the problem all overbearing fathers have. Some demented horndog male is putting his perverted hands all over daddy’s little girl.”
“Well, when you make it sound like that, it doesn’t seem creepy at all.” She made a face, either at the blouse or me, but I couldn’t tell which.
“Your father has very set ideas about what roles everyone plays in his life. You were supposed to stay a little girl forever.” I shrugged. “It’s not creepy, it’s just sort of... unfortunate.”
The weight of that thought hit me, and I felt like I might need a chair to sit down. Was that the reason I’d felt so isolated from Neil during his treatment? Because he’d slotted me firmly into the “girl I have hot sex with” compartment in his brain, and since we weren’t having hot sex, he didn’t know what to do with me?
That was fucking awful. It would mean that our entire relationship was based on our physical compatibility and nothing else. At least, nothing else for him. Was I just the younger woman, after all?
“Sophie, are you all right?” Emma’s brow furrowed with concern. “You look quite pale.”
“Yeah, um.” I lifted a hand to my temple, but I didn’t feel any pain. I just needed to get out of the store. I needed to be alone. Possibly with more alcohol. �
��I think I’m getting a headache. Not used to drinking before noon. Do you mind if we go back to the house after this?”
“Yeah, no problem.” She checked her phone. “Yikes, we’ve been out all day. Just let me pay for this, and I’ll meet you in the car.”
I waited in the back seat while Emma finished up in the shop. I held my phone in my hands and considered calling the house. It was a bit after five, and the sun was already beginning to set. Neil would probably be taking a nap to rest up for dinner. I didn’t want to wake him.
As we drove back to the house, I thought of how I could broach the subject of my epiphany with Neil. He wouldn’t want to hear about it, I was sure. Neil lived his life as though he could bend reality through sheer force of will and denial. Leukemia had already knocked that worldview down a few pegs, and I wasn’t sure I wanted to be the jerk who knocked him down the rest of the way.
Emma was quiet on the ride home, probably because of my fake headache. Which made me feel guilty for lying about it, but it was way easier than explaining that I’d succumbed to a sudden bout of emotional turmoil.
“That’s my mother’s car,” Emma said with a frown as the Maybach approached the house. A silver Bentley sat at the curb.
My hackles were officially raised.
Emma didn’t look pleased. “What the Christ could she possibly be doing here?”
I had no idea. But if this why Neil had sent Emma and I out today, I would be furious.
I tried not to do the whole “woman scorned” thing as I stormed through the foyer and up the first flight of stairs. “Neil?” I called out. “We’re home.”
“Um, we’re up here,” he called out, and I could tell from his tone that he knew he’d been caught. “We’re in the library.”
Emma let me lead the way, and we found the study doors open. Neil sat in the armchair in front of the fire place, a blanket tucked around his legs. He was in his navy pajamas, with a scarf covering his head. On the couch perpendicular to him, Valerie sat holding a rocks glass of something amber colored, and beside her was a man in a gray suit. He stood when we entered.
“This is Ms. Scaife, I presume?” the man said, extending his hand.
I shook it briefly. “Sophie, please. You are?”
“Sophie, this is Alan, he’s handling some things with my estate,” Neil said quietly.
Oh. So, that explained Valerie’s presence. After all, she was his business partner.
But I couldn’t help but feel a little hurt that Neil sent me away. It wasn’t as though I would have intruded if he’d wanted to take this meeting privately. I was good enough to be trusted with his day to day medical care, but I couldn’t know he was talking to Valerie about his will?
“Emma, your father has something he’d like to tell you,” Valerie said, patting the space between her and Alan.
Emma went to the couch and sat down, and I went to the desk and rolled over the office chair to sit beside Neil. What the hell was going on? Had he gotten some bad news? I tried to remember if a doctor was supposed to call today. But if that were it, surely he would have contacted us. He would have told me, not Valerie, right?
Neil reached took my hand, looking over at me apologetically. “This concerns you, as well.” He turned back to Emma and cleared his throat. “When I revised my will during the divorce, I removed Elizabeth and made you the sole beneficiary of my estate. Your mother would become the Chief Executive of Elwood and Stern, but you would retain controlling interest in the company.”
“You would also have inherited your fathers’ property, with the exception of a few sentimental items he wanted distributed to family and friends,” Valerie put in.
“Would have?” Emma looked to Neil. “Dad, I don’t really want to know all the details of your will—”
“But you need to hear them,” Valerie interrupted. “Go on, Neil. Tell our daughter what you’ve decided.”
His gaze flicked up, and a sense of horrible realization crashed over me. It was good, because my foresight deadened the shock. “Aside from a small allowance to off-set the cost of care for your grandmother should I pass away before she does... I’m dividing the sum of my estate between you and Sophie, with Sophie receiving twenty-five percent of any liquid assets, as well as a small portion of stock in Elwood and Stern and the apartment in New York.”
“I have advised your father against this,” Alan said, giving me an apologetic look. “But he remains rather committed to the idea.”
“Neil, no.” I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t want to be talking about this. “You’re going to be fine, none of this is necessary.”
“We don’t know that I’m going to be fine,” he argued gently. “And it will ease my mind greatly knowing that you’re taken care of, should the worst transpire.”
“I don’t need twenty-five percent of six billion dollars.” I pulled my hand from his. My face was hot. The asparagus from lunch threatened to make a return appearance. “I don’t... were you even going to discuss this with me? I’m not going to agree to this.”
“You don’t have to agree to it,” Valerie interjected. “He can do what he wants. If I were you, I would get used to it.”
“Oh, shut up, Valerie, nobody fucking asked you!” I snapped, before I could stop myself. The room went deathly silent.
Her eyes flared. She turned to Neil, as if expecting him to scold me. When he said nothing, she set her drink on the end table and got up to storm from the room.
Emma gave me a very clear “what the hell?” glare and got up, following her.
“Damnit.” I closed my eyes and dropped my head back. “We’re not done, Neil. We’re going to talk. I’ll be right back.”
He didn’t try to stop me from leaving as I followed Valerie out of the room and into the hallway.
“Valerie.” I didn’t want to apologize to her, because I wasn’t sorry. It had felt good to yell at her, in the meanest way possible. I’m sure she didn’t want to hear an insincere apology from me, anyway. She turned, Emma standing beside her, eyes wide, perfectly mirroring her father’s I’m-terrified-of-conflict face. Valerie waited for me to speak first.
“I didn’t ask him for this. And I’m going to do what I can to change his mind.” I waited a beat, then added, “But this isn’t any of your business. I’m not taking anything away from you. I don’t even know why you’re here.”
“No, you’re taking it away from my daughter.” Valerie smiled. It wasn’t a friendly smile. “And I’m here because I care about Neil and I don’t trust you. I don’t think he should trust you. You haven’t been with Neil a year, and you’re suddenly in his will.”
“As I said, I didn’t ask for it, and I don’t want it.” My back teeth ground together of their own volition. “If you have a problem with me over what happened at Porteras, that’s more than fair. But you don’t get to have a problem with my relationship with Neil. You aren’t a part of it.”
“Look, you have to have something.” Emma surprised both of us by speaking up. “You moved to a different country to be with him through this, and you’ve been out of a job.”
“She made a choice, Emma. She followed the money.”
And that was it. That was all it took. I was either going to rip Valerie to shreds right there in the hallway, or I was going to cry. I chose the latter, because it didn’t come with jail time.
“Goddamn it, mother!” I heard Emma curse as I stormed back toward the study.
When I got within earshot, I heard Alan saying, “—strongly urge you to reconsider. There are a number of other options we can explore to see Ms. Scaife provided for.”
“Fix this!” I demanded as I marched up to Neil. “You’ve got your ex and your daughter thinking I’m some kind of gold digging freak. I can’t deal with this right now!”
“Sophie,” Neil said, his eyes going wide with shock. He pushed up from the chair, wheezing as he did. I knew the pain managing drugs made him tired, and I felt instantly guilty. He was set, though, on putting
his arms around me, and I let him.
Jesus, he was so much thinner than before. When did that happen? “I don’t want to think about any of this. I don’t want people to think I’m rooting for you to die.”
“No one thinks that,” he murmured against my hair.
“Mom thinks that,” I heard Emma say from the door. “Sophie, I’m sorry. She’s just drunk and she’s not handling this well.”
“Emma, could you—” Neil asked, and she cut him off before he could continue.
“Yeah. I’m going to take her home and try to calm her down.”
“I’ll call you in the morning, Neil,” Alan said, awkwardly collecting his things.
“I’m so sorry about all of this,” Neil said, and I know he was embarrassed. By my behavior, by Valerie’s behavior, by the entire situation. But I didn’t care. I felt attacked and wronged, and not just by Valerie.
“You can’t just spring something like this on me,” I said quietly once Emma and Alan had left the room. “You can’t do that to Emma, either.”
“I didn’t know any other way,” he admitted quietly. “I wanted to have everything settled before you got back.”
“I think you mean settled behind my back.” That was another part that bothered me. “You trusted Valerie to be a part of this decision and not me.”
“She’s my business partner,” he began patiently, making his way back to his chair. “And the mother of my child—”
“And you’re not with her. You’re with me.” This sucked. No matter how close I felt to him through all of this, we had only been together for five months. Did I have the right to demand to be included in these decisions?
If they had to do with me, then yes.
“If I’m your partner, if you really believe that this is a serious relationship and we’re on equal footing, you shouldn’t be going to Valerie for this stuff. You should be coming to me.” I knew I sounded jealous. I needed to own it. “I don’t like her, Neil. I think she is trying to insinuate herself into your life in ways that aren’t healthy. I know for a fact that she doesn’t want us to be together.”
The Girlfriend (The Boss) Page 30