Someone has that job.
With the guard’s help, I slipped into the biohazard suit. At least I’d had the foresight to wear pants and not a skirt. After I secured my hood and turned on the respirator, a rush of air entered the suit. It blew softly against my ear, blowing a few loose tendrils around my cheek. The guard helped me through the remaining safety checks. One mishap and my suit wouldn’t be airtight.
If this suit fails, I’ll surely die.
That realization crashed upon me like a baseball shattering through a glass window.
It became real what I was doing which forced me to focus. At least it squashed my other worry. The worry that I would enter Davin’s cell, tongue-tied, and not be able to do my job. Again, I didn’t understand why Dr. Roberts chose me. I was the least socially apt in our group. Has he not picked up on that?
I took a deep breath and pushed that thought away. Right now, I needed to concentrate on one thing and one thing only.
Survival.
With the safety checks complete, Sergeant Rose gave me a reassuring smile. His kind brown eyes softened before he squeezed my gloved hand and exited the containment room. The door separating us sealed behind him like the lid closing on a coffin. I stood alone in the small, white chamber with nothing but my breathing and pounding heart for company.
A moment later, Sergeant Rose’s voice sounded in my hood. His words rang loud and clear through the earbud. “Test, test. Can you hear me?”
“Yes.” I fiddled with the volume and turned it down.
“Are you ready?”
Ready? Is that a rhetorical question? “I guess so.”
“On my mark. Five . . . four . . . three . . .”
The green light still shone above the door.
“. . . two . . . one.”
An alarm sounded. Red light replaced the green.
Red.
The universal color of danger.
The color of warning.
The color of blood.
For a second, I froze. On the inside, I was slamming myself into the door, even though it hadn’t opened yet. Just having that seal broken was enough to make me panic.
Makanza particles covered every surface in Davin’s cell. Right now, some virons were creeping their way into this room, like warriors stealthily inching across the battle line, ready to attack given the slightest opportunity. Never had I been in a situation like this. Not the lab, not the deep freeze, certainly not at school. In none of those situations was I out of control in my environment. Now, I would be the visitor in a cell controlled by Makanza.
“Are you okay?” Sergeant Rose asked.
I knew my suit conveyed my vitals to him. I could only imagine what my heart rate read. “Yeah.” I took a deep breath. “I’m fine.”
“I’m opening the door now. Are you sure you’re ready?”
I forced myself to nod. “Yes.”
The door hissed as six-inches of solid steel swung outwards. I waited until it was completely open, but I still didn’t move. Am I really only a few steps from Davin’s cell? Is there really nothing between him and me but my suit?
With a deep breath, I stepped forward.
13 – GOING IN
I didn’t know what I expected. Maybe some change in the air color or a subtle difference in the cell’s interior. Something that alerted me to Makanza’s contamination on every surface.
Of course, nothing like that happened.
After I was completely in Davin’s cell, the door swung closed. I faintly heard the hiss as it sealed. I turned and watched the decontamination process through the window. Dials inside the room turned as a mist sprayed from all angles and coated every millimeter of every surface. The purifying process didn’t take long. A minute later, the light above flashed green. Any potential particles of Makanza that had entered the room in those few, short moments, were gone.
I knew Davin was in the Chair, but I still hadn’t looked at him. I couldn’t. I needed to compose myself and get my lines rehearsed one last time. As I internally stated my introduction, I studied Davin’s cell.
The furniture was intact. I took that as a good sign. I searched the back of his room. A toilet sat discreetly in the far corner behind a half wall. A single shower stood beside it. So that’s how they bathe.
My entire lab group and Sergeant Rose watched me through the window. My gaze met Amy’s but then a flash of movement caught my attention.
Dr. Roberts stepped into the watch room. He crossed his arms and positioned himself close to the glass. It was impossible to read his expression.
I briefly realized an observing audience was what Davin lived with day in and day out. His life was forever on display. My gaze traveled to the hall with its floor to ceiling windows. I balked. His life truly was lived under complete exposure.
After I’d looked everywhere but at Davin, I knew I couldn’t put it off any longer.
Finally, I turned toward him.
He came into view, millimeter by millimeter in the hood’s viewing shield, like a slow-moving assembly line of inanimate body parts.
He sat calmly in the Chair, his relaxed posture in complete contradiction to the metal bands secured around his chest and limbs. His blue irises blazed. He had such beautiful eyes.
In fact, his entire face was striking. High cheekbones, a proud straight nose, deep set eyes, firm lips, that smooth skin a mixed shade of honey and fire. Beautiful. Truly, he was, but his look held such contempt. It distorted his natural beauty.
Absolute hate filled his gaze. I could almost feel the hatred emanating off him.
Sweat trickled past my ear. I suddenly felt very hot.
Davin obviously had no intention of breaking the ice. We stood looking at one another for a full minute, maybe longer, and then Dr. Roberts practically burst my eardrum. “What the hell are you doing, Dr. Forester?”
I jumped when his barking voice filled my earbud.
In the watch room, my boss stood with his hands on his hips, a scowl on his face.
Amy stood by his side, slowly nibbling fingernail after fingernail off all of her fingers, while Mitch and Charlie stood with their arms crossed over their chests, worried expressions on their faces.
“Get on with it, Dr. Forester,” Dr. Roberts growled.
I wondered what it was like for my boss. To not be in control. It didn’t take a genius to see that it didn’t suit him. Moistening my lips, I turned back to Davin and opened my mouth to begin my carefully rehearsed introduction.
I walked closer, my feet heavy in the suit. “Do you mind if I sit down?” I waved at the chair by his desk.
He just looked at me, the hatred pulsing off of him.
With awkward movements, I pulled Davin’s chair over. The dragging sound along the concrete echoed in the small cell. I positioned the chair a comfortable four feet away from him and sat. Swallowing, I folded my hands in my lap and began the process I’d memorized from the research done at Compounds 10 and 11. The process where I developed Davin’s trust.
Or tried to.
“Hello, Davin. My name’s Meghan Forester. I’m a researcher here at the Compound. As you probably noticed, I’ve just joined your group.”
He didn’t reply.
“I’m here today to talk to you. That’s it. I won’t be taking any samples.”
His gaze narrowed. I could practically feel his suspiciousness meshing into the hatred.
I licked my lips again and continued. “As of yesterday, we’re trying something new. We’ve learned . . .” I waved my gloved hands toward my research group and turned awkwardly in my suit. Nobody had moved. Except for Amy. She was now biting the cuticles off the sides of her thumbs.
I turned back to Davin. “We’ve learned that the way we’ve been doing things isn’t very effective.”
He still didn’t reply.
“So from now on, we’re not going to take samples from you unwillingly.”
His eyebrows shot up like fireworks on the Fourth of July. “And
you expect me to believe that?”
My heart thumped. He replied! “Well . . . um . . . not right away of course, but over time, I hope you see we’re serious.”
He didn’t say anything further, but that suspicious look remained.
“You see, we’ve learned that the virus responds better when it’s taken willingly. I know that sounds crazy, but some other Compounds have discovered very promising results when they’ve varied their collection process. I can assure you that you won’t be . . .” I almost said tortured but stopped myself just in time. “Ah, you won’t be subjected to anything that you don’t consent to from now on.” I smiled encouragingly. I figured if he knew the reasoning behind this change, he might actually believe it.
Unfortunately, the opposite seemed to happen. Davin’s eyes hardened. “You must really think I’m stupid,” he muttered so quietly I almost didn’t hear him. I opened my mouth to reply, but he beat me to it. “Do you really think I’d believe you’re never going to take samples from me again, just because I say no?”
“I—”
“You really think that sadist,” he glanced toward Dr. Roberts, “won’t cut into me again?”
“No, you don’t understand—”
“Oh, I understand,” Davin interrupted, his voice growly and deep. “I understand that you’re a naïve, young researcher who believes everything she’s told, but I know more about this place than you ever will.”
My mouth dropped. A minute passed where we just stared at one another. I finally managed to force a few words out. “Davin, please . . . Just give me a chance to prove this to you. Please, let me try.”
For a second, I thought he looked at me. Really looked at me, and saw me. Not some phony researcher covered up in a ridiculous suit, but me. Meghan. But as quickly as that look flashed across his face, it disappeared.
“Dr. Forester . . .” Dr. Roberts’ voiced warned in my ear.
I ignored my boss. “I know you don’t believe me, and I don’t expect you to. But please, give me a chance. Let me prove to you that things are going to change.”
“Do you know how many times I’ve been promised things in here?” he said quietly.
“I . . . I know. I know what’s been done to you.”
“Then you’ll excuse me for not wanting to spend another minute listening to this bullshit. Now, get out of my cell.” He said the words so quietly yet with such burning intensity, I flinched.
“Please, Davin . . .”
“Get out!” he roared.
I stumbled to standing, feeling like the biggest idiot in the world. “I’m sorry, Davin. I’m sorry for what’s happened to you, but if you would just let me explain . . .”
He closed his eyes, a muscle ticking in his jaw.
My stomach plummeted as I realized what he was doing. He was taking control of the situation in the only way he could, by closing himself off. He was defenseless in the Chair.
My heart sank.
I stumbled back to the watch room, feeling like a complete fool. Did you really think he’d react any other way? He was right.
I was naïve. I was foolish.
I’d actually thought if I explained everything to him, he’d see that I was serious, that we weren’t going to hurt him anymore.
Right. Since when has he not been hurt? Of course, he wouldn’t believe you!
My shoulders slumped when I stepped into the containment room. How am I supposed to get through to him? How am I, of all people, supposed to do this?
He hated us.
He hated me, and I didn’t see how anything could ever change that.
BACK IN THE containment room, I tried not to look as horrible as I felt. Once I was out of the biohazard suit, the lasers scanned my body. The light in the containment room flashed green.
The only good thing about the entire debacle was that I wouldn’t be dying of Makanza in the next few weeks. I suppose I should be grateful for small miracles.
When I stepped into the watch room, my boss assessed me coldly. “That was quite the performance, Dr. Forester.”
Humiliation made my cheeks burn. “Yeah, it’s not what I hoped for.”
“Cut her some slack.” Mitch glared at our boss. “I’m sure none of us would have done any better.”
“Yeah,” Amy added. “Davin hates us. You can’t expect that to change anytime soon. I’m surprised he even talked to her. He usually refuses to speak to any of us.”
“That’s gotta be a good sign.” Charlie shoved his hands in his pockets. “She’s probably the one he hates the least since she just started.” He grinned after he said that. As if anything about this situation was promising.
“Hmm,” Dr. Roberts replied.
I sighed, feeling a little better that everyone leaped to my defense. As much as I hated how the interview went with Davin, if you could even call it that, Charlie may be right. Since I was the newest to the group, Davin had barely interacted with me. Although considering he lumped us all into the ‘hated researchers’ group, maybe it wouldn’t matter.
Still, I had to cling to some hope.
We left the Inner Sanctum shortly after that. As we walked down the windowed hall, I peered into Davin’s cell. I did it cautiously, trying to respect his privacy. He was out of the Chair, at his desk, his back to us. He never looked up.
His blatant action to ignore us stung. I knew I meant nothing to him, but still, I cared. I cared about him and all of the people in this country infected with Makanza. It wasn’t right what had been done to them, and I wanted to be part of the team that stopped it. Maybe someday he’d see that. Maybe someday he’d wave goodbye to me, instead of turning his back.
Right, and maybe someday I’ll see the pyramids of Giza.
I frowned and kept walking.
I nibbled my lip as my mind raced for how to continue. Maybe I’d be able to get through to him with a lot of patience and a lot of time. If there was one thing I was good at, it was persevering. I hadn’t gotten to where I was today for lack of determination. If I just worked hard enough, if I didn’t give up, maybe I’d make progress with him.
My resolve grew fiercer as we approached the lab. With a goal in mind, I set about planning how to achieve it. That didn’t make working very productive. I spent the majority of the afternoon replaying my conversation with Davin, analyzing what I did well (very little) and what I needed to work on (pretty much everything).
I kept second guessing myself too, which didn’t help. If I had used a different tone, would it have gone better? If I’d given him more time to engage in the conversation, would he have said more? Should I have been so upfront with him for why we were changing procedure? Maybe I should have eased into what Compounds 10 and 11 had discovered at a later time.
I shook my head as soon as I thought that. No, that was probably the one thing I’d done right. If I ever wanted to gain Davin’s trust, I had to be one hundred percent transparent, about everything. I had a feeling if he ever found out I lied, about anything, he’d shut me out like the borders to Canada.
Forever.
LATER THAT AFTERNOON, Dr. Roberts returned to our lab. I was so lost in thought I didn’t realize he stood right beside me until his voice barked in my ear. “Dr. Forester. I’d like to speak to you.”
I jumped. “Um. Okay.”
He led me out of the lab, into the hallway. When he turned toward me, his cold eyes pierced mine. He had gray eyes. I’d never noticed that before. Right now, they looked like sharp, metal bullets shooting right through me.
“I told Dr. Sadowsky how poorly today went and how entering Davin’s cell was a complete waste of time.”
My stomach dropped.
“Unfortunately, he disagrees. Dr. Sadowsky wants you to keep working with Davin. I suggested we try Mitch, but he’s insistent it’s a woman.”
My heart pounded. It never occurred to me that they might stop this experiment, or give up on me so quickly. “I’m sure I can do this.” I rubbed my icy palms on my pants.
>
He raised his eyebrows. “You are?”
“Yes. I won’t let you down.”
“Let’s hope not. You have one month to obtain a sample. If you fail, I’m sending Amy in.”
I balked. A month? “Is that the time limit Dr. Sadowsky gave?”
“No. That’s the time limit I’m giving. The sooner we end this hippy nonsense, the sooner we return to real research.”
Hippy nonsense? Real research? I stood up straighter. “But Compounds 10 and 11 are the only Compounds who’ve made progress. Don’t you consider that real research?”
His eyes narrowed, and his voice dropped to a deadly quiet tone. “Are you questioning me, Dr. Forester?”
I opened my mouth to acquiesce but then stopped. “Yes. I am. Dr. Hutchinson’s labs made a huge discovery. I think we all need to work together and give these new techniques a try. It’s the only lead we have right now.”
Dr. Roberts’ head cocked. “Well,” he finally said. “We’ll see.” With that, he turned and marched down the hall.
I stood looking after him, my breathing coming fast. I couldn’t believe I’d done that. I thought I’d never have the guts to stand up to my boss.
I smiled. Jer would be proud of me. Taking a shaky breath, I turned back to the lab.
I SPENT THE evening reviewing textbooks on the human psyche and traumatic events. That was kind of how I viewed what the Compound had done to Davin. Continuous psychological trauma.
“You gonna read all night?” Jeremy lounged against the wall in my living room, sitting on the floor beside me, his feet crossed at the ankles. Books and papers were strewn everywhere.
“No, not all night. Just most of it,” I replied without looking up.
He thumbed through one of the books I’d checked out from the Compound’s library. “Interesting stuff,” he said dryly.
I gave him an annoyed look before turning back to my paper. “It is interesting, at least to me.”
“Why are you reading this?”
I bit my lip. He knew I couldn’t talk about the Compound, although I wanted to. It would be such a relief to talk to him. To tell him about my fears and anxieties. I was terrified of failing at this. This, being the one thing that mattered to me now more than anything.
The Complete Makanza Series: Books 0-4 Page 19