“Mom. Let me help you.”
“You can, honey. You can. The police are looking for your dad. They want to charge him for this, and he’s going to be real mad about it. I need your help with bail. You know I hate to ask for money, but I need help with your dad.”
Whatever hope he had in his heart that came from that scared little boy broke inside him. She’d picked her husband over her son. No matter how many times Frank put her in the hospital, she would always choose him.
Decker had no idea how to break the cycle. He only knew his place.
He’d be the haven that she’d never reach for.
He’d make sure she knew he’d be there and try to find a way for her to get out, but unless she tried…
Everything would be lost.
“Mom. I’m not going to do that.”
Her face fell, and he felt like he’d been punched. The look in her eyes…damn it. He was not his father.
He blinked.
He wasn’t his dad.
Holy shit.
What had he done?
What had he done to Miranda?
“Decker, honey, I need you.”
Shaken, he swallowed hard and took another step back. “I can’t, Mom. If you want out, if you need a place to be safe, then I’m here. But I’m not going to help the man who put you here. I’m not going to help you get hurt again.”
With that, he left his mother weeping in her bed. Maybe this time she’d ask for help that meant help for her and not the man who they both hated. Maybe this time it would be different.
Decker might not have hope, but he had the ability to not give up.
At least that’s what he thought.
He’d given up on Miranda. No, that wasn’t right. He’d given up on himself, and he’d ruined it all. He’d walked away when she needed him the most, and there was no coming back from that. Even if she still wanted him, she’d never trust him again, and he didn’t blame her.
He’d ruined it because he was scared.
He blamed it on his old man and his scars, but that was a cop-out. He’d ruined it all because he’d been afraid, and now he’d never forgive himself.
By the time he made it home, he was sick to his stomach and his hands shook. He didn’t know what was coming, didn’t know what he’d do next, but he knew it couldn’t go on like this. If he spent the rest of his days hiding and scared, he’d become the one man who’d always frightened him, and then he wouldn’t be a man at all.
He had no idea what to do next.
He’d thought he wasn’t worthy of Miranda before, but now he knew that was even more the case.
He’d left her.
Yes, he wasn’t his father, but the fact that he’d left her made whatever he did that much harder to come back from.
There was no coming back from that.
With a sigh, he got out of his truck and headed inside. Gunner came in through the doggie door and barked while dancing around Decker’s legs. Decker leaned down and gave his dog a full-body rub. It was nice to see at least one person—dog or no—that was happy to see him. Actually, Gunner had been a bit depressed in the couple weeks Miranda had been away. It seemed that she had charmed more than one male in this house.
And then Decker had gone and ruined it.
Something knocked into the door, and Decker frowned. Gunner growled by his side, and he shushed him.
“Go to the pantry,” he ordered, pointing at the doorway. Gunner didn’t look pleased, but followed directions.
Something was wrong, and Decker didn’t want his dog hurt by whatever it was. Years of trying to protect those in his circle had taught him that.
Something smashed into the door that sounded like glass, and Decker sighed. Instead of going out there and facing whatever the fuck was going on, he called the cops. They told him they were on his way and to stay inside.
His front window shattered.
The glass sprayed into his living room, and he ducked behind his kitchen island as glass showered the floor.
“Boy! Get your fucking ass out here. I need your fucking help.”
The man was a fucking idiot. A Class A idiot who was on the run from the police and decided to scream his presence at the top of his lungs. Decker stood, grabbing a rolling pin on his way. He wasn’t about to grab a knife. With the way the drunk son of a bitch stumbled into his house, Decker would be the one more likely to get cut than the intruder.
“What the hell, Frank.”
“Boy, don’t you backtalk me. I need you to hide me. The cops are on my tail.”
How the man had eluded them thus far, Decker didn’t know. What he would do, though, was make sure the old man stayed put. The cops would be there soon, and hopefully, breaking and entering would extend any sentence the old man was likely to get.
“You can’t just break into my house. You’re not welcome here. You never were. And when the cops catch you, I won’t help you. You deserve to be behind bars. You deserve to go to fucking hell.”
Frank wavered on his feet. “I helped raise you, boy. You have to help me.”
“No. I really don’t. I’m done with you. I’m done thinking that you can control my life, my actions. Even when I thought I was through with you, you were still there in the back of my mind fucking up my life.”
“You can’t blame me for all your problems. You lost that little piece of Montgomery ass on your own.”
“Can’t deny that, but you’re done haunting my thoughts, my actions. I’m not you. I’ve never been the man you are, and I’ll never be.”
The sirens in the distance grew louder, and Frank’s eyes widened. “You son of a bitch.” The man lunged, and Decker moved out of the way, letting him fall to the ground. Frank got back up again, swayed, and then tried to punch Decker.
Decker ducked out of the way then took Frank by the arm, pinning him to the wall.
“We’re done,” he growled. “Done.”
Frank slammed his head back, knocking Decker in the chin. Decker staggered back and threw up his hands as Frank tried to hit him again.
The cops broke the door down, shouting for everyone to get to the floor. Frank lunged one more time, but the biggest cop took him down before Decker got hit.
It was over.
It had to be.
By the time the cops took his statement and hauled Frank off in handcuffs, Decker was ready to sleep for a few days. Instead, he boarded his window up and explained what had happened to the neighbors. They offered condolences and didn’t look at him like he was scum. In fact, their derision was reserved for his father, not for him.
Maybe if he’d figured that out sooner, he wouldn’t have lost the only person who’d ever mattered to him.
No, that wasn’t quite true. Other people mattered a whole hell of a lot, but he’d only fallen in love with one of them.
Before he thought better of it, he found himself in front of the Montgomerys’. He needed…he needed a mom. He knocked once then blinked out of whatever haze he was in. What the fuck was he thinking? He’d burned those bridges. He’d left Miranda, and now he didn’t have the support system he’d never thought he’d truly needed.
He turned away and walked toward his car, his soul broken.
“Decker?”
Marie’s voice hit him, and he froze.
“Decker, honey, what’s wrong?”
He turned, his hands shaking. “I…I…”
“Come inside, honey. We’ll fix it.”
She sounded so sure, but he knew that wasn’t the case. “Frank’s in jail again, and Mom wants me to bail him out,” he blurted. “I can’t stay here, Marie. You know that. I fucked up. I fucked up bad. I’m never going to have Miranda again. I lost her because I pushed her away.”
Marie raised her chin. “Get in here, baby. We’ll fix it. We’re family, honey.”
He shook his head, and she stomped her way up to him. She was so tiny compared to him. In fact, she couldn’t have been that much bigger than Miranda.
<
br /> “You are my son, Decker. I know we never had the chance to make it formal, but I raised you along with my other children. Yes, you fucked up with my baby girl, but the man I raised will fix that. You need to grovel, get on your knees, and show that girl you’re the man she needs. You need to be there for her no matter what. No more running away.”
“She shouldn’t forgive me.”
Marie shook her head. “She just might. She won’t forget, but then again, neither will you. Now get your ass in the house, and we’ll make your night better. You need food and company. That man…” She shook her head. “That man who called himself your father is nothing. He’s out of your life, and we’re going to make sure it stays that way. As for Francine, well, if she needs a way out, we’re here. I’m never going to be able to forgive what happened to you as a boy, but I will never blame the woman for what Frank did. Now get in the house, Decker. We love you, honey. We’ll fix this.”
He swallowed hard then nodded, wrapping his arm around Marie’s shoulder. She did the same to his waist, and he sighed.
Harry and Marie were the parents that had raised him. They were the ones he would strive to emulate, not the mess he’d come from.
If only he’d seen that earlier, maybe he wouldn’t have lost Miranda. Maybe Marie was right and he could grovel his way back. He’d do anything to have her back.
He just hoped she’d take him.
Chapter Twenty-two
Miranda covered her face with her hands.
“I told you it was bad,” Griffin said softly. “But now Frank is out of the picture, and Decker had Francine moved to her sister’s place. That part is over.”
She nodded then sucked in a breath. Her legs and one of her arms were still in casts, but the rest of her was on the mend. She couldn’t walk or do anything on her own, but she wasn’t crying every time she moved.
She and Griffin had just become really close.
Thank God she could bathe herself if he wrapped her casts because, yeah, no thanks.
“I can’t believe his dad broke into his house like that. He really went off the rails.” She laid her head back on the couch and tried to get comfortable. That was easier said than done these days.
Griffin sat down on the coffee table in front of her. “Mom said Decker was starting to actually move on.”
She frowned. “From what?” Her pulse picked up, and she bit her lip.
Her brother shook his head and cursed. “Damn it, that’s not what I mean. I’m sorry. I meant that he’s moving on from his father. Not from you.” He closed his eyes. “Fuck. I’m so sorry. This is just weird. I’m not used to having to shield myself from you or him. Not that it matters because you’re the one in pain, in more ways than one. I’m going to just shut up now. You’d think I’d be better with words considering what I do for a living.”
A tear rolled down her cheek, and she shook her head, grateful it didn’t hurt when she did that anymore. It wasn’t Griffin’s fault that things were awkward. That blame landed on her and Decker’s shoulders. She didn’t want to be the person that split Decker off from the group. She knew she’d have to deal with the fact that Decker needed to be part of her family, even if he wasn’t with her. He might not have the last name, but her parents had adopted him long before she’d fallen in love with him.
Now she had to deal with the consequences.
She didn’t want people to take sides, although they already had. Her mom and dad, though, hadn’t. They’d been supportive of the both of them, even if they did it for different reasons. That was just one of the many reasons she loved her parents.
But now she was healing and alone, and Decker was finding out who he really was…and alone.
God, this sucked.
“You want me to make you something to eat?” Griffin asked, clearly trying to change the subject.
“I’m not hungry, but if you are, go ahead.” She raised a brow when he didn’t move. “Go work or something, Grif. You don’t need to sit and watch me. It’s not like your presence actually knits the bones together.” She’d tried to joke, but when he winced, she knew she’d made the wrong move. “I’m sorry. I’m okay, Grif. I promise. Go work on the next great American novel, and if I need anything, I’ll ring this little bell.” In demonstration, she picked it up off the couch and gave it a few rings.
Griffin squinted then rubbed his jaw. “I swear that thing has the perfect resonance to make my fillings hurt. What the hell was Austin thinking?”
Miranda laughed. “I’m thinking he just wanted to make sure I could get you if I needed you.”
Griffin stood, grumbling under his breath. “Leif is getting a fucking drum set for Christmas.”
“I’m pretty sure Maya was planning on getting him that.”
He cursed and ran a hand over his head. “Fine, an electric guitar. The kid can be his own one-man band and annoy the hell out of Austin.”
“I think with the new baby on the way, they’ll have enough noise going on.”
Her brother gave her a small smile then waved as he went back to his office. The man needed to work, and since she’d been staying there, she knew he wasn’t doing as much as he should have.
In addition to that, with her incapacitated and him being a slob, the house was starting to get a bit cramped. Thankfully Meghan had hired—with help from Wes and Storm—a maid to help. Meghan had wanted to come over and help, but Miranda had told her no. Her sister had enough crap going on in her life right now, and she needed to focus on her kids and her future. Miranda would be here healing when Meghan needed a break, but right then, other priorities needed to be in focus.
Being alone in the living room left her with her thoughts, and sometimes that wasn’t a good thing. She couldn’t help but think of Decker and his so-called healing.
Maybe he was finally finding a way to live with the man he was, not the man he thought he was, but she didn’t know.
She missed her friend, missed the man she’d fallen in love with, but she couldn’t heal her body and help him heal his soul if he didn’t want it. It wasn’t as if she wanted to be the one to make things better for him, but it would have been nice if he’d figured things out before ripping her heart from her chest.
God, she hated how weak she sounded. She’d have to push him from her heart and her thoughts if she wanted to move on. She had to remember she had her job when she got back, a family that loved her, and based on the way things were crumbling down around them, needed her, and a future she could figure out…on her own.
She could do that, but it didn’t mean she wanted to.
She wasn’t sure where she could fit Decker in her life now. He didn’t want to risk whatever they had, so he’d thrown it away, but now, according to her parents, he was in their lives, which meant, eventually, he’d be in her life again. She didn’t find it selfish of her parents to have taken him in. Far from it. He’d always been there, and she’d been the one to change the rules. Plus, Decker needed them.
She just wished he needed her.
The doorbell rang, and she sighed. She wished she could answer it on her own, but there was no way with these casts on.
She waited for Griffin to come out of his office and answer, but no one came.
The doorbell rang again, and Miranda closed her eyes. Her brother must have started writing. Sometimes he got so caught up, he missed things like doorbells…and proper hygiene.
No wonder Austin got her the bell that hurt Griffin’s teeth. He couldn’t ignore that. She picked it up and rang it a few times until her brother staggered out of the hallway.
“Dear God, stop it. For the love of God, please stop it.”
She pointed to the door with the bell, and Griffin rolled his eyes, a faint blush marring his cheeks.
“Sorry, got caught up.”
The doorbell rang again.
“I’m coming, I’m coming.” He opened the door, and Miranda watched his body freeze. “What the fuck are you doing here?”
She tried to look past her brother to see who it was, but she couldn’t move the right way. It didn’t help that she had a feeling she knew who it was from Griffin’s reaction. She didn’t know if she wanted to be right or not.
“Can I please talk with Miranda?”
Decker’s deep voice slid over her, and she trembled. She didn’t know if it was from need, ache, or tension, and she didn’t know if she was ready. God, she hated being weak. No, this wasn’t weakness. This was just too much all at once. She hadn’t seen him since before the accident. The others said he’d stayed all night in the waiting room and then had been the first to see her. The fact that he’d left right after that made her want to scream, but he’d written that he’d done it to protect her.
Stupid man.
She didn’t need protecting.
She looked down at her casts. Those were extenuating circumstances.
“She doesn’t want to see you, man,” Griffin said back. “In fact, I’m not sure I want to see you either. You’re a fucking asshole for what you did to her.”
“I know I am, Grif. God, I’m a fucking idiot on top of all that. I’m so fucking sorry I broke your trust, but I need to see Miranda.”
Tears pricked the back of her eyes, but she forced them back. She’d done enough crying over what she’d lost. She didn’t want to do it again.
“She doesn’t want to see you,” Griffin repeated. “You need to go.” Her brother let out a sigh that seared her soul. “Maybe…maybe one day I’ll want to see you again too, but right now, all I see is the man who hurt my baby sister, and I don’t think I can deal with that.”
A lone tear slid down her cheek, and she cursed herself. Damn it. She did not want to cry again, and yet the fact that her brother was also hurting just made it too much to bear.
“Griffin,” she called out, her voice hoarse. “Let him in. I’ll talk with him.”
Griffin looked over his shoulder and frowned. “You don’t have to. He can leave, and we can move on. I don’t want you to overwork yourself while you’re healing.”
She held up her casted arm. “I’m healing right now, and I can heal while I talk to him. Let him in. It will only prolong the inevitable if we kick him out right now. Okay?”
Tempting Boundaries Page 24