Dad is still stalking Nikki. If that wasn’t enough to make anyone puke, it’s all I can do to keep the spinach and salmon vol-au-vent down when I realise who’s walking towards me. ‘What are you doing here?’
‘Nikki wanted me to bring a touch of A-list glamour to this wretched C-list catastrophe,’ says Bart Smedley.
‘Which reminds me,’ I say. ‘Bad luck for getting knocked out last week. It must have been awful for you.’
‘Best thing that ever happened.’ Bart shrugs. ‘When has the public ever appreciated true talent? Anyway, if I was still slumming it with the wannabes I would never have got my latest gig.’
Bart is going to be the new face of a well-known brand of sausage. ‘I thought you said you’d never do an advert.’
‘I said I would only do one if it was right for me artistically,’ says Bart, giving Mrs Magwicz a regal wave. ‘Just wait till you see it. The director said it was the first time he’d seen great acting in a commercial.’
‘Yeah, whatever, Bart. Anyway, I need to find Twilight. I want to talk about the final with someone who really understands.’
‘Still barking up that tree, are we?’ says Bart, picking a piece of spinach out of his teeth. ‘I don’t want to rain on your parade or anything, but she’s just using you, Matt – trust me.’
‘No she’s —’
‘Excuse me . . . Sausage,’ says Nikki, dragging me towards the cake. ‘I need Matt to blow out his candles.’
‘Can’t we wait for Twilight?’
‘No can do, I’m afraid,’ says Nikki. ‘We have to get this done and dusted before the crew go into overtime. OK, people, let’s sing “Happy Birthday”.
KFT do the first line unaccompanied and then everyone joins in, apart from Dad who stands next to the cameramen and films it all on his phone. ‘Go on, son, take a deep breath.’
I’m not really in the mood. The candles are like those things they have in churches and I feel dizzy by the time I’ve blown out all fifteen. That’s why I’m not sure if I’m seeing things when the front of the cake opens and out steps Twilight. It’s only when Nikki insists on filming it again (‘and this time, for God’s sake, everyone clap’) that I’m sure she’s for real.
‘Where have you been?’ I say. ‘I thought you weren’t coming.’
‘I’ve been hiding in that stupid cake for the last twenty minutes,’ she whispers, beaming at the cameras. ‘Anyway, I’ve got to give you your present.’
‘Great,’ I say. ‘What is it?’
‘Not here,’ she says, taking my hand and glancing anxiously over her shoulder. ‘Let’s find somewhere a bit more private.’
And I feel even dizzier when she takes my hand and leads me out of the ballroom and down the corridor until we come to the white sofas outside the cocktail lounge.
‘Sit down,’ she says.
I take a seat on the edge of the sofa. ‘Thanks for spending all that time in my cake. It was a really nice . . .’
I feel her warm thigh against my white suit. ‘I’ve wanted to do this for ages,’ she says.
‘Have you?’ I say, tightening my calves so I don’t black out. ‘What do you mean?’
Twilight checks the corridor to make sure no one’s watching. ‘Open your mouth and close your eyes and you shall have a big surprise.’
I do what she says, screwing my eyes tight shut. ‘Can I open them ye—?’
A moment later her lips latch on to mine and she sticks her tongue in my mouth. It ought to be the best moment of my life, but if you really want to know, I’m just scared. I remember Curtis Morgan saying something about ‘getting some decent tongue action going’ so we kind of circle tongues, like two towels in a tumble drier, while I figure out what to do next. She tastes of mouthwash. I kind of wish I’d gone easy on the spinach and salmon vol-au-vents.
Twilight makes a strange grunting noise, which I guess must mean she’s enjoying it. I desperately need to come up for air, but when I try to pull away, she locks on to my mouth and carries on kissing.
And then I open my eyes. ‘Oh my God.’
There’s a camera crew filming the whole thing. ‘Don’t mind us,’ says the sound guy.
‘It’s OK,’ says Twilight, pulling me back down. ‘Don’t take any notice of them.’
I try to carry on, but it feels all wrong. ‘I’m sorry I . . .’
And that’s when I see her; standing over me with her arms folded and a weird expression on her face. At first I’m pleased, next I’m confused, and then I’m just really angry. ‘Hang on a minute. What are you doing here?’
Bex
‘What do you think I’m doing?’ I say, trying hard not to think about what I’ve just seen. ‘I’m here for the party.’
‘But it’s guest list only,’ says Matthew. ‘Who the hell let you in?’
‘The bald guy in the suit that doesn’t fit. He showed me the side entrance.’
‘Mr Packham?’ says Matthew. ‘Why would he do that?’
‘He said he wanted to see what happened next.’
‘Look, I’m busy, OK?’
‘Yes, I can see that.’ The cameraman closes in on us. I shove my hand in his lens. ‘Look, could you stop filming, please? This is private, OK?’
‘Yeah, all right,’ he says, nodding at the microphone guy. ‘We’ve got what we came for anyway.’
I turn to Twilight. ‘Look, I’m sorry, yeah, but I really need to talk to Matthew.’
‘She’s staying here,’ says Matthew.
‘It’s all right,’ says Twilight, following the camera crew back down the corridor. ‘You and your lady friend obviously have things to discuss. I’ll leave you to it.’
‘Don’t go, Twilight,’ calls Matthew. ‘It’s not important. She’s just a . . .’ He watches her disappear around the corner and then turns on me. ‘Now look what you’ve done.’
‘Shut up, you idiot. Your mum’s here.’
‘What?’ says Matthew, looking like someone’s just pulled a gun on him. ‘Why?’
‘Isn’t it obvious?’
‘Crap,’ says Matthew, looking like the gunman’s about to shoot. ‘Where is she?’
‘She’s out the front with Emily.’
‘Look, Bex, I can’t see them right now.’
‘You are unbelievable! Have you any idea what you’ve put her through? The least you can do is talk to her.’
‘Everything all right here?’ says the security guard outside the main entrance.
‘We’re fine thanks, Des,’ says Matthew. ‘She’s with me.’
‘Hi, Matthew,’ calls Emily from the bottom of the steps.
Matthew freezes when he sees his mum. ‘She said she wouldn’t be seen dead in that thing.’
‘Changed her mind, didn’t she?’ I say. ‘Come on, Matthew. What are you waiting for?’
Matthew follows me reluctantly down the steps. ‘Hi, Mum,’ he says, staring at her feet.
‘Come here, you,’ says Sue Layton, grabbing him round the neck and giving him a big sloppy kiss. ‘Now tell me what’s going on.’
Matthew pulls away, brushing down the sleeves of his stupid white suit. ‘What do you mean?’
Sue Layton wheels herself towards him. ‘All that stuff with your dad. We saw the show, Matthew. Are you really so ashamed of me that you’d rather pretend I don’t even exist?’
‘I’m sorry, Mum, I . . .’ Matthew’s face is whiter than any vampire’s. ‘Look, I’d better go back in. They’re having a party for me.’
‘We know.’ Emily smiles. ‘That’s why we’re here. Can you introduce me to Elizabeth, Matthew, can you?’
Matthew backs slowly up the steps. ‘It’s guest list only, I’m afraid. I’m sorry, Em, you can’t come in.’
‘But we’re your family,’ says Emily, throwing herself at him and wrapping her arms around his waist.
‘Sorry,’ says Matthew, trying to shake free.
Sue Layton’s voice is quivering with pain. ‘Let him go, darling. It’s obvious h
e doesn’t want to see us right now.’
‘But why?’
‘It doesn’t matter,’ she says. ‘Let him go.’
Emily releases him and pulls the skanky rabbit from her back pocket.
And that’s when I crack. ‘Here’s your present, you spineless bastard.’ You wouldn’t believe how careful I was about wrapping it, but now I just chuck it at him with all my strength. ‘I thought I wanted to be famous once. But not if it means turning out like you.’
Matthew stoops in the gutter to pick it up and scurries back to the revolving door.
Matthew
The ballroom is practically empty. Three red-faced waiters are humping the guitar-shaped ‘cake’ on to a trolley, and a red-dressed lady is polishing off the last spinach and salmon vol-au-vent.
‘Where is everybody?’ I ask.
‘Nikki told them to go home,’ says Elizabeth. ‘Oh, and your dad said he was sorry he couldn’t stick around to say goodbye – important meeting, I think.’
And now I’m starting to panic. ‘Where’s Twilight?’
Elizabeth shakes her head; I try not to look desperate. ‘I’m sorry, Matthew, I don’t know. Last time I saw her she was dancing with the wee guy from that children’s programme.’
‘But I have to speak to her. You see we were . . .’
The spinach and salmon vol-au-vent that Elizabeth is about to swallow gets a momentary reprieve. ‘Yes?’
‘It doesn’t matter. Sorry, look, I’ve got to . . .’
Twilight isn’t in her room either. I bang on her door about a million times, but there’s no answer. What looked like being the best day of my life has suddenly transformed into the worst equal, and I slink back to my room and do something I haven’t done since the day Dad left – jump on the bed and cry myself to sleep.
I must have been sleeping for ages, because when the knocking wakes me, I see that it’s almost eight o’ clock. I’m still feeling a bit woozy, but I don’t care, because I know who it is. I knew Twilight wouldn’t desert me for long. ‘Come in,’ I call, trying to uncrumple my suit, hoping against hope that she’s come back to finish what we started.
Disappointment floods over me like a tropical tidal wave when I realise who it is.
‘You seemed a wee bit upset,’ says Elizabeth. ‘I thought I’d better pop up and see how you’re doing.’
‘I’m fine thanks,’ I say, lying through my teeth.
‘I’m pleased to hear it,’ says Elizabeth, hovering in the doorway. ‘Now if you don’t mind, Matthew, I’ve got a wee favour to ask you.’
‘I’m kind of sleepy right now.’
She walks into my room and sits down in the armchair. ‘I want to sing, Matthew; not what someone tells me to sing, but something I really love. Have you got your guitar up here?’
They call me ‘the boy with the guitar’, but most of the time I just have to mime until the chorus. ‘It’s under the bed.’
‘And do you think you could play this?’ She hands me a leather-bound book of Celtic folk songs with a dried daffodil marking the place.
‘Sure. Just give me a minute to tune up.’
Elizabeth’s voice sounds even more amazing in such a small space. By the time we get to the second verse of ‘An Eriskay Love Lilt’ I almost forget what I’m worrying about. Music can do that sometimes – take you to a totally different place. And I’m beginning to feel human again when my phone starts ringing.
‘When I’m lonely, dear white heart, black the night or wild the sea, by love’s light my foot finds the old pathway to . . . Hadn’t you better answer that, Matthew?’
‘I don’t know I —’
‘Go on,’ says Elizabeth. ‘It might be important.’
My thumb hovers above the green button. I’m not exactly desperate to talk to her right now, but some kind of instinct makes me take the call.
‘Look, don’t hang up,’ says Bex. ‘I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news.’
I thought she’d be swearing at me by now. ‘What is it?’
‘It’s your mum,’ she says. ‘When we got home, she kind of . . . collapsed.’
‘What? Where is she?’
‘We’re all at the hospital – the General. I had to come out to the car park to use my phone.’
‘Don’t worry. I’ll get there as soon as I can.’
Nikki takes it surprisingly well when she finds out about Mum. She even arranges for a car to take me straight to the hospital. And I’m still apologising when I get into the back seat of the plush red Jaguar. ‘I’m sorry. It’s not something I really like talking about.’
‘Don’t you worry about a thing,’ says Nikki, climbing in next to me, her eyes twinkling in the darkness. ‘On the way there, you can tell me the whole story.’
Bex
I nearly cried when Dad’s van pulled up in the car park. The cubicle is so crowded that Kyle takes Emily to ‘look for dead bodies’ while we wait for the doctor to come back from Australia or wherever she’s been, and discharge Sue. Dad paces the cubicle, taking two steps towards the empty bed and two steps back to the heart monitor while whistling that duet from Chess.
Mum’s still in her OneStop uniform. ‘I was dead worried,’ I whisper. ‘I didn’t know what to do.’
‘You did really well, love,’ says Mum. ‘I’m proud of you.’ She gives me another cuddle and then chews her bottom lip, like she always does when she tells me off. ‘But I warned you it would be difficult, didn’t I, Bex? They shouldn’t really have asked you, you know.’
‘Yeah,’ says Nat, wiping baby sick off her sweatshirt. ‘That was well out of order, that was.’
‘I thought she was going to die,’ I say. ‘You should have seen her, Mum. She looked so . . .’
‘I am here you know,’ says Mrs Layton, who’s sitting in her wheelchair bouncing Yasmin on her knee.
‘Sorry, pet,’ says Mum. ‘I didn’t mean to . . .’
‘That’s OK,’ says Sue, blowing a raspberry on Yazz’s tummy. ‘It’s true, anyway; we should never have asked Bex to do what she did. To be quite honest, I didn’t think she’d stay the course. Anyway, I’m fine now. The doctor says it’s definitely not another flare-up – thank God. And you’re right, you should be very proud of her, she’s a talented girl. Which reminds me, Bex – when you can spare a moment, I’ve got a little proposition to put to you.’
But before my head gets too big for the cubicle, the curtain slides open, and in rushes Matthew.
‘Mum, Mum,’ he says, almost going arse over tit on the heart monitor. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to . . . Are you OK?’
‘I’m fine,’ says Mrs Layton, making funny faces at Yasmin. ‘We’re just waiting to go home.’
‘I didn’t mean to stress you out,’ says Matthew. ‘I just thought . . .’ And I almost feel sorry for him, until Kyle walks in with Emily and he stops grovelling and goes mental. ‘What’s he doing with my sister?’
‘All right, Geez?’ says Kyle. ‘Just getting your mum a cup of tea from the machine.’
I know she only likes organic Earl Grey with a dash of lemon, but Sue Layton hands Yasmin back to Natalie and takes a pretend sip from the plastic cup. ‘Thanks, Kyle, that was very thoughtful of you.’
‘You do know who he is, don’t you, Mum?’ says Matthew. ‘It’s that psycho kid I told you about from school. You know, the one the police had to drag down from the roof?’
‘Because there was a cat up there,’ says Emily. ‘Kyle told me all about it.’
‘He never told me,’ says Dad.
‘And you believed him, I suppose,’ says Matthew.
‘My brother is not a liar,’ I say, wanting to wipe that silly smirk off his smug little face. And I’m just about to smack him one when a massive bouquet of flowers floats into the cubicle and starts talking in a voice that brings back some terrible memories.
‘All right if I come in?’
Nikki Hardbody chucks the bouquet on to the bed. ‘And how’s the patient?’
‘She’s fine,’ I say, wondering what that cow is up to. ‘Now I think you’d better clear off.’
‘And you must be the sainted Bex,’ says Nikki Hardbody. ‘Matthew says you’ve been an absolute treasure.’
‘Really?’
‘He said he couldn’t have done it without your help. That’s why I want you and your . . . charming family to be my guests at the final next week – especially that delightful baby.’
‘Sweet,’ says Kyle, giving Emily a high five.
‘I don’t know,’ I say. ‘I think I might be —’
Nikki’s face lights up when she sees Sue Layton. ‘And you must be Matt’s amazing mother. He’s told me all about you.’
‘I doubt that very much,’ says Sue.
‘You’d better believe it,’ says Nikki, giving Yasmin a playful pinch on the cheek. ‘That’s why I’ve got something very special planned for the final; that’s why I want you to be the ‘guest of honour’.
Yasmin howls, like she’s trying to warn us or something.
Sue Layton takes the hint. ‘I don’t think so,’ she says.
‘But Matt needs you there, don’t you, Matt?’ says Nikki.
Matthew stares at the heart monitor.
‘It’s a bit difficult with the chair,’ says Sue.
Nikki closes in on her prey. ‘Don’t worry we’ll send a car. And besides, it’ll be your chance to put the record straight. After all, Mervyn’s had his say, hasn’t he? Come on, what do you say?’
And I’m like, Nooooo, don’t do it, you dozy cow.
But Sue Layton is so not a mind reader. ‘Well, all right then,’ she says. ‘If you really think Matthew needs me there.’
Matthew
I’ve been up this hill over a thousand times, but never in a limo before. The camera crew are waiting outside the main gate to get a shot of me looking out the window at the sign with St Thomas’s Community College (Headteacher: Mr D Edmonds MA) on it.
Elizabeth’s lucky, all she has to do is walk around her village with her dog Archie and sign autographs in the cattle market. Twilight’s gone back to her boarding school in Surrey and I’m supposed to be playing along with the popular adult myth that your schooldays are the happiest days of your life.
The Bex Factor Page 13