by Lucy Clark
‘And yet I’ve hurt Jasmine the most by uprooting her from her friends.’
‘The practice would have closed down if you hadn’t bought it when you did. It’s necessary for that community to have a functioning, working medical practice and you’ve put the needs of the many ahead of the needs of a fourteen-year-old girl who will one day forgive you.’
‘Will she?’
‘Did you forgive Dad when he followed his dreams and took us all to Perth?’
‘Yes, but—’
‘You followed your dreams, Stacey. You did what you knew was right deep down in your heart. Jasmine isn’t collateral damage. Far from it. Just look at how she’s helping more with George and Lydia, how she’s helping Pierce’s sister. Those are good things.’
Stacey sighed. ‘I guess.’
‘You’ve held us all together for so long—plus you’ve had your own personal emotional dramas to contend with. And although Molly and I are always there for you—and we know you know this—you still need those moments of solitude.’
‘But I don’t want solitude.’
‘Don’t you?’ Cora was surprised. ‘I always thought that sometimes, with the three of us living in each other’s pockets all our lives, you just needed some space to breathe.’
‘Do you?’
Cora thought on this for a moment. ‘I think I find my solitude in adventure.’ She spread her arms wide, indicating the military-style truck behind her. ‘Just to speak to you like this I have to borrow a truck, drive an hour through rough, dirty tracks that any ordinary four-wheel drive would get stuck in, and then head to the top of a mountain where the satellite transmission is strongest.’
‘And I appreciate every time you’ve done this. I know it must cut into your valuable work there in Tarparnii.’
‘But you see, Stace, that’s my point. I like going four-wheel driving—just like Molly loves dancing and going on clown patrol and joining in with every social activity any hospital runs. That’s her solitude. Yours is to contemplate the meaning of life.’ Cora smiled at her sister. ‘And I know Jazzy’s causing you concern, but perhaps she’s just trying to find her own place—her thing she likes the most.’
‘Her solitude?’
‘Her happy place,’ Cora offered.
Stacey sighed. ‘I hope she finds it soon.’
‘What about you?’
‘What about me?’
‘Have you found your happy place?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘You’re different, Stace.’
‘I am?’
‘Yes.’ Cora threw her arms in the air. ‘Can’t you see it? Feel it?’
‘Feel…what?’
‘Pierce! Stacey, I’m talking about Pierce. Even over the internet chat I could see he was dreamy. You’ve picked a winner there.’
Stacey’s smile widened as she tucked her hair behind her ear. ‘Oh, Cora. He makes me feel so…tingly and shiny and…and…’
‘Happy?’
‘Yes. That’s why I guess I’ve been feeling guilty about Jasmine—because for the first time in a long time I’m…happy.’
‘Don’t feel guilty, Stace. Accept it. Draw strength from the way Pierce makes you feel. You deserve a world of happiness—especially after you-know-who.’
‘It’s OK,’ Stacey replied. ‘You can say his name now, because with the way Pierce makes me feel I’ve realised that whatever it was I had with Robert it certainly wasn’t love.’
‘Wait. wait, wait!’ Cora clasped her hands together and stared at her sister. ‘What are you saying? Are you saying that you’re in love with Pierce?’
Stacey’s smile was bright and wide and filled with delight. ‘I…I…think so.’
Cora squealed with excitement. ‘Oh, Stace, really? This is wonderful, great—and a whole heap of other awesome adjectives.’
Stacey laughed, loving her sister and wishing she was there in person so they could hug.
‘Say it again,’ Cora demanded, clapping her hands.
‘I think I might be in love with Pierce Brolin,’ Stacey stated, and even as she said the words out loud she knew that it was far more absolute than she was willing to admit even to her sister.
She didn’t just think she was in love with Pierce. She knew it with all her heart… But for now, although she adored her sisters and the close bond they shared, she needed to keep that intimate piece of information to herself.
CHAPTER EIGHT
‘I SEE YOU and Stacey are spending a bit more time together,’ Mike said as he tossed some poker chips into the middle of the table. Edna had already lost all her chips and gone off to make them a cup of tea.
‘Yes.’ Pierce had been wondering when Mike might bring up the topic of Stacey. ‘I see your chips and I raise you.’
Their friendly poker games had been going on throughout Mike’s recovery which, Pierce had to admit, was good. Mike was adhering to the diet his cardiologist had recommended and was also looking forward to the rabbit jumping competition George and Lydia were planning to attend.
Mike considered his cards, then tossed the same amount of chips into the centre of the table. ‘Call. What have you got?’
For a moment Pierce wasn’t sure whether Mike was talking about the cards or about the fact that he’d been spending more time with Stacey. Mike was very protective of all the Wilton children, taking on the role of family patriarch with pride.
‘I have got a full house,’ Pierce remarked, placing his cards on the table.
Mike chuckled and didn’t cough once, which Pierce was pleased to note.
‘That you do, boy. If you’re serious about Stacey there’ll definitely be a full house. Are you up to taking on that level of responsibility again? Raising siblings?’ Mike placed one hand over the pile of chips in the centre of the table.
Pierce had thought about it—especially as he was spending more and more time not only with Stacey but with the rest of her siblings. She was a package deal. He couldn’t have one without the other. He was the same. He would always have Nell in his life. But she was now at the stage where one of her housemates, Samantha, had moved in, and the event they’d meticulously planned and structured for many years could now finally take place: Nell living independently.
But Stacey…beautiful, wonderful Stacey. She responded to his kisses as though she’d never been kissed before, as though she’d never felt this way before, and, he’d had to admit he felt a connection with Stacey that he hadn’t felt with any other woman before.
‘Well?’ Mike brought Pierce’s thoughts back to the present.
Pierce looked down at the cards neatly laid in a row. Full house. Was he ready?
‘I wanted to find out whether this thing between Stacey and myself was something special—whether it was worth pursing.’
‘And is it?’
Pierce reached out, lifted Mike’s hand from the pile and pulled all the chips towards him. ‘Yes.’
Mike gaped. ‘But what about the job? The one they’re constantly bugging you to come over for?’
Pierce shrugged. ‘Some dreams aren’t meant to come true. I learned that lesson a long time ago.’
‘Hmm…’ Mike looked at his friend. ‘I hope you’re right.’
Pierce nodded. ‘Stacey’s worth it.’
‘Your feelings are that strong?’
He thought about Mike’s question for a moment. Were they that strong? Was Stacey worth sacrificing his main chance to head over to Yale and lead a team of researchers? He’d been wanting to do that for so long now, but Nell had always come first and there had been no way he was going to choose a job over his most beloved sister. Now Nell was settled and he was free to go, to follow his dream—the one he’d been aiming towards for such a very long time.
And yet there was the way Stacey was able to see into his heart, to understand everything he’d already sacrificed for the love of a sibling, and the way she felt in his arms—as though he’d finally found his home, the place where he be
longed… Were his feelings strong enough that he would never have regrets at turning down the only job he’d ever really wanted?
Pierce’s answer was a firm nod in the affirmative, yet for some reason he couldn’t bring himself to speak the word yes out loud once more. But he was certain he was falling in love with Stacey, and he was prepared to love and accept not only her but the rest of her family, just as she loved and accepted Nell.
‘I hope you’re right, boy,’ Mike remarked as he shuffled the deck of cards. ‘Ready for another hand?’
Pierce eyed his huge pile of chips, then looked at Mike and smiled. ‘Sure. What have I got to lose?’
Mike’s answer was a wise old chuckle. ‘If you’re not careful? Everything.’
*
The following Saturday the sun was shining brightly, making the early October day perfect for a picnic in the park. Unfortunately, by the time they all arrived at King Edward Park, it had become clear that several other people had had the same idea, and all the council-provided barbecues were already in use.
‘We’ll have to queue for the barbecue,’ joked Samantha, Nell’s new housemate, as they spread picnic blankets beneath a large shady gum tree. Nell was already getting excited and pulling a Frisbee out of the bag she’d brought with her.
‘Come on, Jasmine,’ she ordered, reaching for Jasmine’s hand and tugging the surly teenager along. ‘Come and play Frisbee with me.’
Jasmine did as she was bid, not looking at anyone but not grumbling about it either.
‘Jasmine’s still not happy?’ Pierce asked, placing a supportive arm around Stacey’s shoulders.
‘Cora says she’s searching for her happy place.’
‘Perhaps Cora’s right. I think everyone searches for their happy place.’
They stood there for a moment, watching Jasmine let Nell boss her around. Stacey wondered whether there was something more to Pierce’s words. Had he found his happy place? Was he happy? With her?
‘She’s incredibly good with Nell,’ he continued, and Stacey detected no unhappiness in his voice so allowed herself to relax into his embrace.
He put his other arm around her, enfolding her against him. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to breathe in his strength, to breathe in the feel of his supporting arms around her. She’d never understood before how others could draw strength just from receiving a hug from someone else—not until she’d met Pierce. But when he hugged her like this she did draw strength from him, and for the first time since they’d moved to Newcastle she saw a glimmer of hope that everything would turn out all right.
‘Are you two going to cuddle and kiss all day long?’ Lydia demanded, wrapping her arms around Stacey’s waist.
Pierce instantly broke the contact and bent to scoop Lydia up, then placed his free arm over Stacey’s shoulder, bringing Lydia into their hug.
‘What’s wrong with that?’ Pierce asked as he kissed Lydia’s cheek. The little girl wrapped her arms about his neck and snuggled into him.
‘You smell nice,’ she told him.
Pierce sniffed her hair. ‘So do you.’
Lydia giggled. ‘That’s ’cause I’ve got Stacey’s perfume on.’
‘Ah…is that what it is?’ Pierce sniffed Stacey, then Lydia, and nodded his head. ‘Yep. Two gorgeous girls…perfectly ripe for…tickling!’
And with that he tickled Stacey’s neck before doing the same to Lydia. The little girl let forth a peal of laughter and Stacey chuckled, her heart delighting at the way Pierce seemed to fit so perfectly with her family.
Although Molly had been called to an emergency a few hours ago she had hopes of joining them later. But with almost all of the people she loved the most nearby Stacey really did feel as though this was her happy place. Her family—complete with Nell and Pierce.
It was as though she hadn’t realised there were pieces of her life missing—not until she’d met this man and his sweet sister. She was still constantly delighting in the sensations and emotions spending time with Pierce evoked, but in the back of her mind there were questions. Questions about what the future might hold and where this relationship was going. About what Pierce really wanted from his life. Was he willing to take on her ready-made family? Or did the thought put him off, as it had Robert?
Pierce had told her about the research team—the ones he wrote his articles for. And he’d told her they’d offered him a job—the same job—several times over. Now that Nell was settled and beginning to live her life of independence was Pierce going to head overseas? To lead the team of researchers? Or did he plan to stay here?
The turmoil of her thoughts kept her awake at night. Her life had been affected by indecision, questions and trauma, and it had made her the sort of person who needed to know where she was going, to map out a path of what the future might hold. If she could deal in absolutes then so much the better, but she had also had to learn how to adapt when life threw her curve balls.
‘I said…’ George remarked, tapping her on the arm. ‘When are we going to cook? I’m hungry.’
Stacey snapped out of her reverie and looked at her brother. ‘Your default setting is “I’m hungry.”’ She ruffled his hair and smiled. ‘There are bananas and apples in the picnic basket. Have one of those to tide you over.’
She glanced at the rectangular brick barbecues provided by the council for everyone to use. All of them were still being used. She glanced over to where a new family was arriving at the park, looking around to stake out their piece of shady grass. The dad carried a portable barbecue and a gas bottle.
‘We should have brought our own barbecue, too,’ George grumbled, pointing to the family who’d thought ahead.
‘Possibly,’ Pierce agreed, ‘but the point of coming to the park isn’t just to eat a barbecued sausage, George.’
‘It isn’t?’
Pierce laughed. ‘Come on. I think there’s a football in the bag. Let’s go kick it around.’
‘Can I come, too?’ Lydia asked.
‘Yeah, Lydia’s really good at football,’ George agreed, his grumbling stomach momentarily forgotten as he raced over to the bag Pierce had pointed to. Pierce released a squirming Lydia from his arms and she ran off after her brother.
‘They really don’t stand still at that age, do they?’ Pierce commented as he leaned over and pressed a contented kiss to Stacey’s waiting lips.
‘You’re thirty-six and you don’t stand still,’ she pointed out with a chuckle.
‘You’re probably right,’ he agreed, kissing her again before winking and jogging off to join George and Lydia on a free patch of grass.
Stacey sat down on the blanket next to Samantha, who was more than happy to sit quietly and absorb the atmosphere. Stacey watched as the family who’d brought their own barbecue hooked up the gas cylinder and began to cook their food. A few of the other barbecues were now being vacated, but at the moment she was in no hurry to rush over there and claim one. Pierce was right. Today wasn’t just about barbecuing food but about spending time together, in the sunshine, enjoying each other’s company.
She slipped on her sunglasses, watching as Jasmine threw the Frisbee at Nell, who didn’t manage to catch it and had to run after it. Jasmine laughed and the sound washed over Stacey like manna from heaven. For this moment in time her little sister was happy. Perhaps that was enough for now.
Stacey closed her eyes, filled with a quiet contentment.
A loud scream jolted her eyes open and she pulled off her sunglasses, her heart pounding wildly.
‘What?’ She blinked a few times and in the next instant a loud whooshing noise seemed to surround the area, shaking every fibre of her being.
‘Stacey!’ She heard her name being called and scrambled to her feet. Samantha, too, was on her feet, staring, aghast, at what was happening. Panic seemed to engulf the entire park, with some people screaming, others running, and some, like her, standing and staring, trying to take everything in at a glance.
‘What do I do?
What do I do?’ Samantha’s high-functioning Asperger’s was starting to show itself.
Stacey’s mind clicked into doctor mode and she handed Samantha a set of car keys. ‘Go to my car and get the big emergency bag from the boot. It’s a big red backpack with a white cross on it.’
‘OK. OK.’ Glad of something to do, Samantha started to focus, and she quickly took the keys from Stacey and did as she was asked.
Stacey stood on the picnic rug and gazed out at the scene. The world seemed to pause as she took in her surroundings, her quick mind piecing together exactly what had happened.
Pierce, Lydia and George were all standing together. Pierce had grabbed their hands, ready to lead them from any danger. Jasmine was standing further away, her hands covering her open mouth, her eyes staring off into the distance in complete shock.
Stacey followed the line of Jasmine’s gaze, her own eyes opening wide as she realised why her sister looked so distraught. Nell lay sprawled on the ground, the Frisbee nearby. Nell wasn’t moving.
All of this registered in Stacey’s mind within one glance.
The next thing to register was the cloud of black smoke filling the air, caused by a flaming ball of gas. The man and woman who had been cooking on the portable barbecue had been thrown to the ground as well, the man writhing and yelling in pain.
‘Gas fire!’
Pierce’s words broke through Stacey’s haze, speeding her thoughts back to normal. He was walking quickly towards her, dodging people as they ran past him. Panic was beginning to grip the entire park. He was still holding onto George and Lydia’s hands.
‘There must have been a damaged regulator or hose and a fat fire has ignited it,’ he called to her.
When they reached the rug George wrapped his arms around Stacey’s waist and Lydia just stood and stared. Stacey pointed to where Nell lay on the ground.
‘Pierce! Look!’
She watched as he turned, his expression changing from one of controlled concern to one of complete despair as he took in the vision of his beloved little sister lying still on the grass.