by Lily Graison
Humiliated to her core, Sarah buried her face against Colt’s neck and hoped the glow from her red cheeks eventually disappeared. Someone knew what was going on in the hayloft?
Colt chuckled and kissed the top of her head. “Might be a while but tell him I’ll be there.”
Sarah groaned as the whistling grew faint in the distance. Whoever came inside the barn was now gone. “How did they know?”
“Cause they’re nosey bastards.” He pulled away from her, hissing a quiet breath as he slipped from her body. He lay beside her and wrapped an arm around her waist. “And they probably saw you come in here and just assumed.”
“Why? Do you normally seduce women in your hayloft?”
He laughed before kissing her shoulder. “No, but I wouldn’t be the first to use this space for a mid-morning romp.”
A romp? Sarah’s chest tightened at the word. What they’d just done was anything but a romp and classifying it as such made it sound like such a cheap act.
Was that all this was to him? A romp? She righted her bloomers and sat up, pulling her dress together and pushing her skirts back down. Her face was blazing, her throat tight, and something hot and fierce burned at the back of her eyes.
She’d given Colt her virginity in a hayloft, in a barn any number of people could walk into, and he saw it as nothing but a romp. She realized then, that’s all it was. A passing moment in his day and the humiliation burned deeper when she realized how big of a fool she was. Did she actually think he’d be so smitten after she gave herself to him that he would love her forever and tell her so?
Yes, she did, but she realized that now he’d finally gotten what he wanted, he’d have no use of her.
Fixing her clothes, she pulled the hay from her hair best she could and avoided looking at him. He was still lying on his side, his pants shoved down over his hips, and was staring at her. She could feel his gaze on the back of her neck. She swallowed the regret she felt and looked out across the barn, to the door and the yard beyond. “I think it would be best if I stayed at the hotel in town tonight. I don’t want to miss the stagecoach again.”
He sat up and reached for her but she stood before he could get a good hold of her. She walked to the edge of the loft, to the ladder leading up. “I’m fine with one of the other men working here taking me. Your brother expects you in the pasture. I’ll go clean up and get ready to go. Have someone come for me when you’ve arranged things.”
She fled the barn in a rush, ignoring him when he called her name. Running across the dooryard, she entered the house and ran up the stairs to the room she’d been given. Once inside, she leaned against the door and didn’t bother trying not to cry.
How could she have been so foolish? She should have known he only wanted one thing from her and it wasn’t to keep her. He wanted to bed her and now he had. There was nothing left, now. His mid-morning romp took more from her than he’ll ever know. He took her virtue, and her heart, in one fantastically magical moment that was nothing but a good time to him.
She had no one to blame but herself. She wanted to experience what it would be like to be loved by him and she had. It wasn’t his fault she thought he’d declare his undying love to her afterwards.
Drying her face, she surveyed the room and laughed. She had nothing there that belonged to her, save the calico dress she’d arrived in, which had been cleaned and was hanging on the door of the bureau. Once she washed and changed, she’d say goodbye to James and leave the ranch, and Colt, behind forever. One day, she might even stop loving him. Then, the pain that came with the emotion would let her feel something other than numb.
Chapter Twelve
For a brief moment, Colt thought Sarah had changed her mind about leaving. She stood on the porch and looked at him with eyes that were a bit too wide.
He’d hitched the old buckboard up and intended on taking her to town, just as she wished, but in the time he’d been sitting there waiting on her, he wondered if taking his horse wasn’t a better idea. Having her sit beside him wouldn’t be nearly as cozy as having her in front of him but since she fled the barn, and dismissed him like a manservant, he didn’t think she wanted the intimacy they’d shared over the last week.
“Are you ready to leave or not?” he asked, staring at her until she finally started moving. She descended the steps and crossed the walkway to the wagon and climbed up before he could even help her. When she was seated, he noticed her pink cheeks, that ugly calico dress, and wondered just what the hell had happened between them.
He flicked the reins to get the horse moving and pulled out onto the road leading away from the house. They made it all the way to the main gate before he looked over at her.
She was staring straight ahead, her shoulders back and that arrogant chin tilted up in a stubborn way. He wanted to smile but thought better of it. He didn’t have to be told she was upset about something. He just couldn’t figure out what that was.
The entire trip into town was made in silence and when he stopped in front of the hotel, pushing the break lever with his foot, she was already climbing down. “Hang on a minute, sweetheart.”
She turned on her heel and glared at him. “I’m not your sweetheart so stop calling me that.”
He jumped to the ground and started around the wagon to where she was but she walked away before he could reach her. He had to practically run to catch her and grabbed her by the arm before she entered the hotel.
Glancing at him, she jerked on her arm. “Let go of me.”
“I don’t think so.” He grabbed her hand and turned, leading her down the street. “We need to talk.”
“I’ve nothing to say to you.”
“Exactly, which is why we need to talk.”
He cut between the Mercantile and the Telegraph Office and into the clearing behind the buildings. There was a bench sitting under one of the trees and he guided Sarah to it, forcing her to sit. “What’s wrong?”
She crossed her arms under her breasts and refused to look at him.
He’d been frustrated and mad enough to bite nails in two many times but never in all his thirty years had he wanted to chew his own tongue off to keep from screaming. That little chin of hers was tilted up again and the fire in her eyes wasn’t missed. She was mad at him, apparently, and damn it all, she was going to tell him why if it took clean to winter for her to do so.
Bending at the waist so he’d be eye level with her he grabbed her chin and turned her face toward his. “What are you mad about, Sarah?”
When he said her name, something flashed in her eyes. He didn’t want to even guess what it was but it gave him a bit of hope. “Come on, sweetheart, I can’t fix it if I don’t know what it is.”
She jerked her head away from his hand and glared at him. “Why do you assume its something you can fix? The entire world doesn’t revolve around you, Colt. Did it ever occur to you that maybe I want to be rid of this town? To be rid of you? That maybe I’m tired and want to go home? Why does my current mood automatically mean I’m upset about something?”
He stared at her long moments before straightening. She was again looking off into the distance. Probably dreaming of reuniting with her pudgy marshal. Just thinking it made Colt’s blood run cold. Why the hell did she give herself to him this morning and then turn into a shrew? He’d been as gentle as he could with her. Held off his own pleasure until she’d reached hers and stayed with her until they were both breathing normally. If he didn’t know any better, he’d say she used him. The thought was ridiculous, though. She’d given him her innocence. And untried woman didn’t use men for sex, did they?
Removing his hat and running his fingers through his hair, he repositioned it to sit low over his face. He looked back down at Sarah, her lips pursed in a manner that said she was finished talking to him, and damn it all to hell, he was too confused to even try. So much for wanting to keep her. She was apparently finished with him and that was just fine. He didn’t need a prickly woman prone to tantrum
s anyway.
Turning, he walked away without another word. Her refusal to talk to him told him it would be useless anyway. He’d go get her a room at the hotel, head back to the ranch and collect his horse. He should have known coming home would end up leaving a bad taste in his mouth. It always did, which is why he never stayed, and with Sarah leaving, there was no reason to stay now, either.
* * * *
She watched him disappear between the buildings and the ache in her chest increased until she thought it would choke her. More tears burned behind her eyes and she refused to let them come. She was through crying over that man. Tired of thinking he wanted her for more than a roll in the hay. She gave him credit for realizing something was upsetting her but she’d die before she told him what it was. How could she look him in the face and tell him she was upset because he didn’t want her forever? That she’d fallen in love with him and was upset because he didn’t love her back. That it tore her heart out to think she was leaving and he wasn’t even going to try to stop her.
That never hearing him call her sweetheart again, or hearing her name uttered past his lips, would be an agony she’d never be able to live with.
The pain in her chest grew until her entire body felt weak with it. Her stomach revolted, her gut twisting until she thought she’d be sick and almost gave into the tears threatening to fall when a sound alerted her she wasn’t alone. She looked up and saw a woman enter the clearing.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize someone was here.”
Sarah gave her best impersonation of a smile and stood. “I was just leaving.
The woman stared at her, a warm sympathetic smile on her face. “Is everything all right? You look a bit… unwell.”
If she only knew. Sarah smiled and nodded. “I’m fine. It’s been a very tiring day.”
“Oh, then by all means, stay.” She pointed at the bench, indicating her to sit back down. “My husband made the bench for me but I don’t mind sharing it. Everyone uses it.” She glanced at the trees, smiling as a few leaves tumbled to the ground. “It’s quite peaceful here, don’t you think?”
Sarah didn’t answer but sat back down. The woman was petite and from the looks of her, and her rounded belly, expecting.
The woman crossed the distance between them and motioned to the bench. “Do you mind if I join you?”
“Not at all,” Sarah said, sliding down the bench.
She sat, sighing once situated. “My husband and I were married here.” She pointed in the direction of the trees and Sarah smiled to be polite. “Seems like only yesterday but too much has happened for it to have been.” She laughed and shook her head, her eyes getting a far off look as if she were remembering. “That has to be the most ornery man god put on this earth.”
Sarah laughed. “I doubt it. The man with that distinction just left.”
“Oh, so I was right to assume your troubles were related to a man.” She gave a small chuckle. “Of course, when a woman has a problem, nine times out of ten, its a man’s fault, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Always.”
They sat in comfortable silence for long moments before the woman turned to look at her. “I’m Abigail, by the way.”
“Oh,” Sarah laughed. “Sarah.”
“It’s nice to meet you Sarah. I don’t think I’ve seen you around town before.”
Sarah shook her head. “You haven’t and I’m not staying. I’ll be leaving on the stagecoach tomorrow.”
Abigail’s smile dimmed. “What a shame. There’s so few women here I can talk to. Well, that I want to talk to.” She laughed and looked over her shoulder as if someone would overhear her. “The town is small, as you’ve noticed, and only a few women live within walking distance. Where are you from?”
Sarah told Abigail of her hometown but was hesitant about telling her how she ended up here. As much as Colt hurt her she didn’t want him arrested. He lived here and she had no idea of his reputation amongst the townsfolk. If they weren’t aware he was an outlaw, she certainly didn’t want to be the one who clue them in.
Thinking of outlaws, Sarah remembered the others, Virgil and his gang who were, as far as she knew, still after them. She wondered if they’d make it this far and a new fear bloomed. What if they did and they found Colt? He was home and probably hadn’t thought a thing about them. Most people felt safe in their own backyard. He probably would to.
She stood, looking back down at Abigail. “I remembered something I need to do. If you’ll excuse me?”
“Oh, most certainly. It was very nice to meet you, Sarah.”
“You too.” She gave the woman one last look before starting back toward the buildings.
When she reached the street, she looked for Colt. Not seeing him, she searched the buildings until she found the one she was looking for and hurried toward it, ducking inside the door before shutting it behind her.
The marshal appeared to be in his mid-thirties, handsome in a rugged way, and smiled at her as he lowered his feet from the corner of his desk. “Afternoon. What can I do for you?”
Sarah tried not to grimace at the stench inside the building and smiled, giving him a slight nod of her head. “I wanted to let you know there is a gang of outlaws probably headed this way. Eight of them, to be exact.”
That earned her a raised eyebrow before he nodded his head to the vacant chair in front of his desk. “Have a seat, Ms.?”
“Hartford,” Sarah said. “Sarah Hartford.”
“All right, Ms. Hartford. Tell me what you know about these outlaws and why you think they’re coming this way?”
She told him everything she could remember about the bank robbery, being kidnapped and then rescued, being chased over two territories to end up here, but left Colt’s name out of it. When her tale was finished, he reached into a drawer in his desk, pulling out a stack of papers.
“Have a look at these and tell me if you recognize any of the men you say are after you.”
The wanted papers were old, some brittle around the edges and falling apart. To her disappointment, not one of the outlaws she remembered resembled anyone on the posters. She sighed and laid them back on his desk. “No, no one looks familiar.”
“All right.” He took the papers, tucking them back into his desk before turning to face her. “Do you know any of their names, perhaps? Hear anything that might help me identify them?
“I only know that one of them is named Virgil. I never got names on the others but I think US Marshals were about to apprehend them but something went wrong.”
A peculiar look crossed his face but vanished too quickly for her to be sure. He smiled at her and stood. “I’ll send a wire over to sheriff Bowers in Missoula and see if he’s heard anything.” He rounded the desk and stopped. “Where can I find you if I have more questions?”
Sarah stood and started for the door. “I’ll be at the hotel until tomorrow. I’m leaving on the stagecoach once it comes in.”
The marshal nodded and told her to have a safe trip and Sarah left feeling a little better. At least if those outlaws did show up, Colt may actually have a chance to come out of the meeting alive. She wasn’t fool enough to believe they didn’t want him dead and as much as her heart ached to think of him, knowing he was still alive, annoying the hell out of someone, she could rest easy knowing she’d done all she could.
* * * *
Colt saw her enter the hotel and stepped out from his hiding place. He rounded the corner, opening the door to the building and waited for his eyes to adjust.
When Morgan saw him, his brother walked around his desk and sat down. “Funny. When I heard outlaw, I automatically thought of you, and here you are. Is that a coincidence or not, Colt?”