52
Willow
* * *
Never in my life did I imagine flying in a private plane. I’d ridden business class to and from school and first class for some family vacations, but never a private jet.
Ashton had driven us to a small airport in San Diego and left his car there.
I’d been so amazed at the bright interior with buttery leather upholstery and rich wood grain tables in between the seats that faced each other.
“There’s a bedroom in the back if you want to sleep,” Ashton said, straight-faced.
His finger was aimed at a closed door behind us as his eyes smoldered on me, sparking my pilot light on.
“Sleep?” I teased.
He shrugged. “You’ll need some eventually.”
When he reached for me, I danced out of his hands.
“We should talk first.”
His lips pursed like he’d been expecting it. I sat, sinking into the seat. He chose one across from me.
Before he could answer, the stewardess came in and informed us we’d be ready for takeoff soon.
As the jet propelled forward, the force of it holding me in my seat, Ashton began to talk.
“I grew up very differently than you. Parts of my life would probably disgust you.”
“I doubt that,” I said.
There was nothing about the man in front of me that I didn’t love even when I thought it was foolish to do so. So what if his life was different than mine?
“My mother and I aren’t close.” I’d guessed that much. “In fact, calling her a mother is a stretch.” That saddened me. “Not too long ago, I found out she had a sister. Something she’d never shared with me.”
I couldn’t imagine a parent holding that secret, unless that family member was poison.
“Is she not a nice person?”
“My mother?” he laughed, and it sounded bitter. “No, she’s not.”
I hadn’t meant her, but I let him speak.
“My aunt, on the other hand, is.”
That had to be a good thing, right?
I watched as he leaned back and shifted his hands under his legs.
“My aunt and uncle have three kids. They’re triplets, actually.”
“Wow,” I said.
I’d met twins before, but never triplets.
“Yeah, two boys and a girl. They’re seniors in high school.”
His reaction suggested this was as new information to him as it was to me.
“And you just found out you had cousins?”
“Not exactly.” I could tell for whatever reason he was embarrassed to mention this. “My aunt couldn’t have kids. They used my mom’s eggs. So, technically they’re my siblings.”
“So, you’re just finding out they’re your brothers and sister.” He nodded. “That was really great of your mom to help them, right?”
His mother couldn’t be that bad if she’d done that.
“I didn’t know I had an aunt, and they didn’t know about me. Mother negotiated with them for how much they would pay her to do them that favor. During these conversations, she didn’t mention she had a son. In fact, the way my aunt explained it, she made it seem like she never wanted kids, which was true in a way.”
I fish-mouthed a few seconds, not understanding why she’d lied to him and her sister. Why was she keeping them from the other?
“Was the money to pay for the medical expenses?”
Another round of humorless laughter came from him.
“No. They covered that. My mother loves nothing and no one outside of money.”
I leaned forward, reaching for his wrists, pulling them free so I could clasp his hands.
“I’m sorry.”
“There’s nothing for you to be sorry for.” He drew away and rubbed his hands like he was cold. “August, my brother, showed up the other day on campus. I didn’t call because he hit me with all of this. Plus, he’d come without his parents’ permission. I had to drive him back home.”
I knew there was a reasonable explanation. But the words were out before I could stop them.
“You took Sawyer along.”
He nodded. “He was there when August found me after practice. I was shocked as you can imagine.”
No time like the present, right? I took in a deep breath and continued down the path we’d found ourselves on.
“Did he tell you I called?”
His eyes shifted away before coming back to focus on me.
“Not at first. I got on him about that.”
“He doesn’t like me.”
It was a statement, not a question.
“It’s not like that. He’s protective,” he said.
I didn’t quite agree.
“He’s jealous.”
Ashton frowned. “Not in the way you’re thinking.”
“Are you sure?”
Part of me didn’t want to know the answer.
“Yes, he’s just not used to sharing me. You have to understand, he’s the only family I’ve ever had. Until Kelley and Chance moved in with us, I’ve only had him to rely on.”
“But he’s never been jealous of them,” I said, drawing the obvious conclusion.
Softy, he said, “No.”
“What does that tell you?”
He unbuckled his seat and shifted forward.
“You’re a threat,” he admitted.
I unbuckled mine. “Why?”
I’d spoken barely above a whisper.
“Because I would much rather spend time with you than him.”
That was all I needed to hear. We crashed into each other. His mouth devoured me as I ran my nails over his scalp, tipping his hat off his head. Then he scooped me up, leaving me airborne in more ways than one. I was too lost in him to notice where we were going. I just wanted us both skin to skin.
Sometime between me hitting the bed and him sliding into me we accomplished that task.
I clawed at him, the need for total possession dominating my mind.
He couldn’t keep his hands off me. He was rough at times, but that might have been during his eagerness to get me naked.
He drove in so deep, he hit the end of me. It was a new sensation, and I didn’t have time to process before his mouth sucked in a nipple, sending me over the cliff’s edge.
His desire hadn’t ebbed, and he used his fingers to bring me back to a fever pitch.
I’d be lucky to walk when we landed, but I loved every second. There was so much need in his eyes I felt love he hadn’t admitted to yet. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking on my part.
I drifted off like he’d predicted but woke up to mewling noises coming from him. The spot next to me was cold. I pulled on my shirt and left the room. He thrashed in his seat, murmuring something I couldn’t hear.
When I put my hands on him, his eyes popped open.
This wasn’t the first time this had happened. I thought about wanting to ask, but he’d revealed so much I figured he would tell me in his own time.
“Bad dream,” I said.
He scrubbed a hand down his face and nodded.
“Want something to drink?”
I searched for the stewardess, who had disappeared, but was pulled onto Ashton’s lap. He nuzzled my head.
“I’m good now,” he murmured.
I gave him comfort by being there. We stayed like that and his breaths evened out. He’d drifted back to sleep. Not wanting to disturb him, I let myself fall back into dreamland too until we were prodded and asked if we wanted a meal.
When we arrived in Rome, I had to admit, I was amazed but a little underwhelmed.
“Don’t worry, it gets better once we get into the city,” he said.
I nodded, taking in the midcentury buildings marred by graffiti. He was right. When we drove by the Colosseum, I got tongue-tied.
“Amazing, huh?” he asked.
All I could do was nod. It wasn’t exactly beautiful, the coloring not bright white but a grayish br
own like mud dotted with holes. Even in the state it was in, I could see majesty in the finer details still there.
“I promise we’ll see it up close.”
I still couldn’t speak. As we drove, the buildings got more impressive. It was so different than anything in America. There was history in everything I saw.
Finally, our driver pulled up to an innocuous hotel.
“Hotel Golden,” I said, reading the sign.
“It’s not a five-star hotel, but I like it. It’s family-owned. The matriarch still cooks the breakfast for the guests.”
“Sounds wonderful.”
In fact, I was thrilled we weren’t at a fancy place, which would only remind me how rich he was. The room we were shown at the end of a hall had a traditional feel, certainly not modern but clean. It was the service, however, that had warranted a return visit. From the moment we walked in the door, we were treated like family. I totally got why he would come back here.
It was early enough that we ate breakfast. Wanting to stay up to beat jetlag, we opted for a self-guided walking tour. We took pictures at the Spanish Steps. At the bottom there were designer shops. He tried to buy me something.
“How about this?” I said, pointing at a small tote bag with the word Rome on it from a souvenir shop. The jean material was also screened with the words Rome with love or rather the love was a heart. Underneath the words was a picture of the Colosseum. It was perfect.
His brow raised.
I shrugged and started to walk away.
“If you want this, you’ll have it.”
The whopping price tag was five euros.
“Do you want to rent a vespa?”
The idea thrilled me, and I nodded. He drove, and I rode behind him, arms curled around his middle. I enjoyed the sights, but mostly him and being that close.
Before we made our way back to the hotel, we stopped at the Trevi Fountain. The larger-than-life sculptures with all the details were more impressive than I’d expected. Add to that, I marveled at how long ago it had taken to construct. Things like it just weren’t made to last anymore.
Dinner was amazing. I had the best pizza of my life at a restaurant two blocks from the hotel. By the time we ended up back in the room, I could barely keep my eyes open. He couldn’t either.
I was awakened by the sheer terror coming from him. He hadn’t turned out the lights, so I didn’t have to grope around for one. Though it crossed my mind that a light had been on in the room he’d used at my house when I’d woken him.
“Ashton, wake up.”
He curled more into himself, begging for the ghost that haunted him to leave him alone. Tears pricked my eyes. I wasn’t sure if I should rouse him, something I’d heard before, but I couldn’t watch him lost in that nightmare a second longer.
“Ashton, please.”
His wide eyes searched the room as if he got his bearings.
I used the back of my hand to wipe at the stubborn tears that spilled from my eyes.
“Did I scare you?” he asked.
I shook my head.
“You know you can talk about it. I promise I would never betray your confidence.” When he didn’t look convinced, I added, “I love you.”
He didn’t respond, not that I expected him to. Hoped maybe.
“You don’t have to say it,” I said, so he didn’t feel obligated.
He shifted positions, scooting up so he was sitting with his back to the headboard. I mirrored him.
“It’s not that I don’t want to say it. I honestly don’t know what love is. But I want to.” He reached up and took the finger I’d used to wipe another stray tear away. He put it to his lips.
“You know how to love,” I said, wanting to remain positive despite the deep sadness ever present in his eyes.
“Sawyer,” he said. I nodded. “Sawyer saved me. My home life wasn’t normal. I didn’t know that until Sawyer showed me what normal was, and when he saved me, he became my hero. I guess without any idea what love should feel like, I thought…”
I wiped a single tear from his cheek.
“What happened to you?” I asked with quiet words, taking his hands in mine.
I felt like we would both need each other if he answered me. His eyes had found his lap, and I braced myself for what he might say.
“You might as well know. I tend to have nightmares most nights.” His gaze lifted and shimmered with so much emotion I cried for the boy who hid in the depths of his mind.
“I was molested.”
The sob tore from my mouth as I wrapped my arms around him.
I whispered, “Your mom?”
His head bumped mine as he shook it.
“No, but she profited from it.”
I squeezed him harder, wishing somehow I could take that reality away from him. It took a few moments, but soon, he gripped me like his life depended on it.
An eternity wouldn’t have been long enough for sobs to rock through us.
I pulled back at some point and peppered kisses on his lips.
“I’m so sorry,” I said.
“For the longest time, I hated touch. The only time Mother touched me was to hurt.”
Everything made sense.
“You don’t have to explain. I get it.”
“I want to feel it, experience it,” he said.
“What?”
“Love. I want you to show me.”
I took his hand in mine and pressed it to my chest above my heart.
“Every time I see you, my heart flutters.”
I moved the tip of his fingers to my lips.
“Your kisses send tingles through me, and I look forward to being with you.”
I took his hand lower.
“When you touch me, my body spins out of control. I might have been a virgin when I met you, but I’ve messed around before. No one has made me wet like this.”
His fingers found that spot.
“You are the first person I think of in the morning and the last at night.”
“That’s love?” he asked.
I shrugged. “There are some things I can’t explain. But yes.”
“My thoughts are never far from you. Football has become a chore because I’d rather spend time with you. I told Sawyer if he was really my friend he would apologize and accept you because you were here to stay.”
“Really?”
He nodded.
Then he moved, inserting himself between my legs, the head of his cock not far from that pulsing part of me.
“And my new favorite place—”
“Rome?” I guessed.
His head shook. “You.”
Then he pulled my panties down my legs before burying his face in my center.
I’d forgotten our conversation when I came with abandon until he slipped inside me.
“I’m pretty sure based on what you described, I’m in love with you too.”
There was nothing fast with his movements. It was a slow, gradual hike to the summit of what could only be described as making love.
We crested the wave together, crashing together. Before I slipped into sleep, I felt him press a gentle kiss to my eyes and whisper.
“I love you, Willow. You’re my Wendy.”
I would dream of Peter Pan that night knowing that he wasn’t a lost boy anymore. We’d found each other. I wouldn’t ever let him go.
“I love you too,” I said before darkness claimed me.
Epilogue
Graduation had come and gone. All of our families tucked back into the places they’d come from. I hadn’t heard from Mother, though I hadn’t expected to. She’d either given up or hadn’t found a way to get in touch with me. But I doubted our paths would cross again until one of us was dead and maybe not even then. My father, however, was making the effort. He’d been there.
“Hey.” I glanced up as Sawyer put down the box he’d carried out of his room. “Mom called and said you sold the house.”
I nodded. “I would h
ave never gone back there even after she’d moved out.”
Mother had tried and failed with a legal injunction to stop me.
“I guess I can’t blame you. It will be weird, not having you here or there.” He blew out a breath and laughed. “It’s really happening. We’re moving away for good.”
Kelley and Chance exited with boxes in their hands. Kelley had come back last semester and worked his ass off to graduate with us.
We all looked at each other. The pair set their boxes down.
“This is it,” Chance said.
“Don’t get all sappy on me, brother,” Kelley said with amusement.
“We’ve got the dude ranch,” Sawyer said, straight-faced until I broke the silence with a laugh. “Don’t you start. You and your haunted hotel suggestion.” Sawyer glared at me before turning a pouting frown to Chance. “Why couldn’t we go to Vegas with the girls?”
I put a fist to my mouth to cover a snicker.
“I promised Brie.”
“That fucking sucks, bro. A dude ranch in Colorado? What kind of bachelor party is that?”
“We can get one with nature.”
Sawyer glared at me. “Take your nature ass there. Willow is a bad influence.” But he said her name with affection. She’d grown on him as I’d known she would. He still pretended he wasn’t sure who put a smile on my face, but we both knew the truth.
“I’m going to Vegas,” he announced.
“We’re going to Colorado,” Kelley said. “This is Chance’s time, not yours.”
“What the fuck ever. If I get married, it’s Vegas. You can bet on that,” he said.
“Pussy whipped,” Kelley coughed. “If Shelly told you to go on a spa retreat, you’d be there.”
Sawyer wasn’t deterred. “Hell yeah, happy endings and all that.”
“Don’t be a dick, Sawyer. It will be fun. Something none of us has done before,” Chance said.
Sawyer rolled his eyes, but good-naturedly.
Then things got quiet as we eyed the boxes.
Kelley cleared his throat. “That’s the last of it.”
Chance agreed.
Then Mason, Kelley’s son, came barreling up the stairs.
“Uncle Ash, Uncle Ash.” He wrapped his little body around my leg. “I’m going to miss you.”
Craving Dragonflies Page 28