Rick shook his head, but Cole wasn’t about to let him clean everything up on his own. He grabbed a sponge from the sink and got it wet, then started cleaning the flour from the table. He could feel Rick’s gaze on him, and even if he wasn’t sure whether the man was looking at him to be sure Cole didn’t hurt him or because he was interested, it was a start. Rick would learn he could trust Cole not to hurt him, ever, and that he would protect him from anyone who tried. Now that he’d found his mate, that he wasn’t completely alone in the world anymore, he wasn’t about to risk the man in any way, shape, or form.
* * * *
Rick kept sneaking glances at Cole, but the man didn’t seem to mind. He wasn’t even acknowledging Rick, but Rick knew Cole knew exactly where he was and what he was doing at all times. It showed in the way he took care of keeping a certain distance between them, probably to not scare Rick.
Knowing that someone cared was weird, to say the least. Kameron, Zach and some of the pack members tried not to spook him, but everyone else didn’t really care. The ones who really did, Rick could count on the fingers of one hand, but that didn’t mean they were close. Not that Rick and Cole were close—they’d met only an hour before, after all. Maybe it was knowing that Cole was Rick’s mate, the one person in the world who was supposed to really care. Of course it didn’t mean that he would. Rick had already lived through too many disappointments to think Cole really would care that much, but he couldn’t help himself. He hoped every time.
Rick checked that all traces of flour, sugar, and other things he’d used were gone. It wouldn’t do for him to leave a mess when Kameron had been so nice. He hadn’t had to hire Rick to take care of the food for his small party, and he certainly didn’t have to pay him, but Kameron had insisted. Rick knew he’d earned the money, he just never expected to be paid. That wasn’t how things had worked before, and it would take him a while to get used to how they went now.
“I’m done. Anything else I can do?”
Rick looked at the table, surprised to find it was now spotless. He wouldn’t have thought Cole willing to clean and help, but he’d obviously been wrong. He shook his head. “N-n-no. I’m d-d-done too.”
Cole smiled and let the sponge fall in the sink, then sat in one of the chairs. Rick wanted to talk to him, to ask if he really should be there. Shouldn’t the man be talking with the people in the other room? He had to have something more important to do than watch Rick clean the kitchen.
Rick pointed at the last full tray in the kitchen. It contained the macaroons he’d baked earlier. He hadn’t done them for the party but as a thank you to Kameron and Zach, but now he had someone else to thank. “T-t-take one.”
Cole arched a brow. “You’re sure?”
Rick nodded. Cole rose from his chair and took one of the sweets. He bit half of it away and his eyes widened. “This is good!”
Rick smiled. “L-1-lavender and h-h-honey.”
“Can I take another one?”
Rick nodded and Cole immediately grabbed another macaroon. Rick handed him a napkin and Cole moved slowly toward him. He held out his hand and took the napkin without coming too close, then went back to his chair and quickly ate both sweets as if someone was out to steal them from him.
Rick chuckled, surprising himself. He didn’t have much to be happy about in his life, but Cole was weirdly endearing. It wasn’t something Rick had expected from him.
Cole looked up and smiled at Rick. “What? You didn’t think I’d like sweets?”
Rick shrugged. “E-e-everyone 1-1-likes sweets.”
“My step-sister doesn’t. Well, she says she doesn’t, but personally I think it’s just because she can’t eat them without putting on weight.”
Rick shrugged. “W-w-who cares about weight?”
Cole looked at him from his scuffed trainers to the top of his still bound hair. “You don’t have to worry about that. You look perfect.”
Rick blushed and looked away. He grabbed the sponge again and started cleaning the counter once more, even though it was gleaming under the white light of the kitchen lamp.
The door opened, thankfully breaking whatever moment they were having, and Rick looked up to see Kameron and Zach entering.
“It was a success,” Kameron said. His eyes went to Cole. “I said goodbye to everyone else on your behalf. Told them you had an emergency.”
Rick nibbled at his lower lip. He’d known it. Cole had forgotten all about his duty in order to stay with him in the kitchen. He didn’t like it, but he also didn’t want to voice it aloud.
“Thanks,” Cole answered.
Zach sat down at the table, quickly followed by Kameron. “So, anyone want to tell me why Cole spent more time in the kitchen than socializing with the other council members? I’m not even on the council, yet I had to endure Noah’s father’s chat about his company. I’m sure he’s successful and everything, but it was boring as hell.” Zach pouted a bit, just enough to earn himself a kiss from the alpha.
Rick looked at them as he prepared coffee. He wanted that too, but he didn’t deserve it. He knew it.
He took the elastic band out of his hair now that he was done cleaning and allowed it to hide his face. That way he could observe without being seen. It was a skill he’d perfected over the years, when hearing and seeing things he shouldn’t have heard or seen could mean being alive rather than dead at the end of the day.
“Rick?”
Rick turned to face Kameron and looked at him. Kameron didn’t seem to care that Rick didn’t answer, because he didn’t wait for him to do so to talk. “Can I tell Zach about you and Cole?”
Rick nodded while Zach gaped. “What, they’re together?”
Rick chuckled again. Both Kameron and Zach looked his way, surprise obvious on their faces, but he just turned back to the coffee.
“No, not yet at least, but they’re mates. If Rick has nothing against it, Cole was wondering about his past. I can tell him for you if you don’t want to talk, at least the little I know.”
Rick went rigid. He didn’t want to talk about his past, even only about the little Kameron knew. That was only the tip of the iceberg, but no one knew the entire story but Rick, not even his mother. Not that she would tell anyone, and even if she did, she had a habit of spending more time drunk than sober, and people knew it. No one would believe her.
Rick took a deep breath and pressed his trembling hands against the cool stone of the counter. “C-c-can it wait until t-t-tomorrow?”
“I don’t have a problem with that. Cole?”
“That’s fine with me. It’s late anyway, and we’ll have time, since I’m moving in.”
Rick twirled around. “Y-y-you’re moving in?”
“Yup. I asked, and Kameron said it wasn’t a problem. I want to be close to you.”
Of course he did. It made sense, but somehow Rick hadn’t even thought about it. He’d thought Cole would go home along with the rest of the council members without a second thought to him. “W-w-why?”
“You’re my mate.”
Cole made it sound so simple. Rick wished he could believe the man, and a tiny spark of hope flared in his chest. He nodded again and grabbed the coffee. He placed it on the table and took three mugs out from one of the cabinets, then placed them on the table. He hesitated but decided he wasn’t going to sit at the table. It would place him too close to the others for him to be comfortable. He leaned back against the counter instead and watched as Cole grabbed the tray of sweets and sat down again.
The three men at the table quickly polished the coffee and the sweets even though they’d already eaten everything Rick had cooked and baked that evening. Rick made to go in the living room to clean, but Zach stopped him before he could walk out the door. “You leave that part of the clean-up to us. You already did too much tonight.”
“B-b-but—”
“He’s right. Go home, and come back tomorrow. We’ll talk, and I’ll give you what you earned tonig
ht,” Kameron added.
Rick nodded and started to leave, but Cole’s voice stopped him. “Can I walk you home? I promise I won’t touch you or come too close.”
Rick hesitated. He didn’t want Cole to see the dump that was his house, or God forbid, his mother. Hopefully she was in someone’s bed rather than at home right now, but Rick never knew beforehand.
He looked at Cole’s expression, a mix of stubbornness and hope, and caved in. He finally nodded and quickly waved at Kameron and Zach.
“Bye, Rick. See you tomorrow. Cole, I’ll get the first room to the left ready for you,” Zach said.
“Okay, thanks. I’ll be back as soon as he’s home.”
“Don’t worry, we don’t lock the door anyway. Take all the time you want.”
With that, Rick walked out the kitchen. He felt Cole follow him and his heartbeat accelerated. He wasn’t sure if it was in fear or something else, though.
* * * *
Cole could see Rick was nervous—heck, he could almost feel it, and they weren’t even mated yet. It was in the tensed way he moved, in the way he wrung his fingers together and in the way he looked everywhere but at Cole.
Cole wasn’t sure if it was his fault or due to something else. Rick had seemed a bit more relaxed while they were in the kitchen, but then they hadn’t really been alone. Now, they were.
They were walking, following a path Rick had found even in the dark of the night. Cole walked slightly behind Rick on purpose. He didn’t want to spook his mate even though his bear was huffing at him. The beast was impatient and couldn’t understand why they weren’t mating yet. Not that Cole could actually explain his reason, but it made it hard to control the bear.
“Do you live alone?”
Rick shook his head, his hair flowing from side to side with the movement. Cole wondered if it was as silky as it looked, how it would feel against his skin, but he knew he wouldn’t be allowed to touch it, not soon anyway. So he tightened his fists to avoid reaching out and let the pain of his nails digging into his palms distract him.
“M-m-mother.”
“You live with your mother?”
Rick nodded.
Cole wanted to ask more questions, but he didn’t know what he was allowed to ask. He didn’t want Rick to react badly and to withdraw even more, so he kept his mouth shut and just looked at his mate.
Cole wasn’t afraid of the hard work he was going to have to do to break Rick’s shell. It would be worth it. He didn’t know Rick, not yet, but this was Cole’s chance to stop being on his own. Not that he hadn’t had lovers or even sporadic friends, but a mate was different. Cole would be able to open his heart to Rick in time, just like Rick would be able to do with him.
Rick continued walking and Cole followed. He was starting to wonder just how far away in the forest Rick lived when they left the path they’d been following and walked into a clearing. The house that stood in the middle of it wasn’t what Cole had been expecting.
It was... shabby to say the least. Cole didn’t know Rick’s financial situation, but he did know that the pack took care of its members. Something was wrong there, obviously, because the house looked like it was barely standing up.
The grass surrounding it was overgrown, one of the wooden steps was missing, and the house badly needed a coat of paint. The porch looked like it was about to collapse on its left side and Cole almost wanted to stop Rick from walking up the steps and going inside.
Rick was nervous and still avoided looking at Cole. “Y-y-you can go.”
“This is where you live?” Cole knew it was, of course, and he even could see the evidence. The grass was overgrown, yes, but someone had cut an uneven path that went from the edge of the forest to the porch. The pieces of wood that obviously had been the missing step were neatly piled next to the door, a hammer next to them, waiting to be used to put the step back where it belonged. There was something else on the other side of the door, tucked against the porch railing, something Cole hadn’t expected to see. It was a big container, similar to the ones he’d seen used as hampers for dirty clothes, but instead of being full of clothes, it was full of empty bottles. Bottles that all had contained alcohol from what Cole could see.
He hadn’t smelled alcohol on Rick, though, so he doubted he was the one obviously getting drunk regularly. That left his mother, since she was the only other person to live there.
“Y-y-yes.”
Rick looked mortified and Cole wanted nothing more than to pull the smaller man in his arms and tell him there was nothing to be ashamed of. He didn’t, of course. It would be the best way to send Rick running. “Are you going to be all right?”
Rick nodded but he didn’t move.
“Do you have a cell phone?”
Rick bit his lower lip, then slowly shook his head.
“Okay. Do you have a home phone, then?”
Rick shook his head again and Cole just couldn’t resist anymore. He moved slowly, raising a hand and stroking the back of his fingers across Rick’s cheekbone. “That’s fine.” Cole let his hand fall, not wanting to push too much too soon. “I just wanted to give you my phone number, just in case. I want you to know that if you need something, anything, you can come to me. Maybe I’ll buy you a phone tomorrow, if you’re okay with it.”
Rick was looking at Cole with wide eyes. He’d raised a hand to his face and was touching his cheek, and Cole was ready to bet he wasn’t even aware of it. “I-I-I don’t know.”
Cole smiled what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “We can talk about it tomorrow, yeah?”
Rick nodded.
“I’m going to go, then. You know where to find me if you need me. Goodnight.”
Cole gave his mate one last smile and was happy to see Rick’s lips quirk in answer. He left his mate in front of his house even if he didn’t want to, but at least he felt like he’d taken a step forward, albeit a tiny one. Rick hadn’t moved away when Cole had touched him, even if they’d known each other for only a handful of hours. That had to mean something, right?
Cole made his way back to Kameron’s house. He was surprised to see the lights were still on in the kitchen, so he went that way once he entered the house. Sure enough, the alpha couple was still there, a fresh pot of coffee on the table.
Cole sat in one of the free chairs and reached for one of the empty mugs next to the coffee pot. “Have you seen the state of the house Rick lives in?”
“I’m not sure we should do this now,” Kameron answered.
“I’m not asking you to tell me about his past, just why he lives in a dump.”
“Rick’s situation is not easy, and unfortunately it has a lot to do with his past. We don’t want to betray him. You’ll find out tomorrow.”
“Tell me about his mother, then.”
Zach’s eyes widened. “His mother?”
“You have to know something about her. I’m not leaving before I have some kind of answer, and I’m stubborn as hell.”
“Rick’s mother... look, I don’t want to talk badly about anyone, and it also has to do with Rick’s past.” Zach held a hand up when Cole opened his mouth to reply. “I’ll tell you what I can, but I’m only twenty. I don’t know the beginning of the story.”
“Kameron does,” Cole pointed out.
“Not really,” Kameron replied. “I don’t think anyone knows exactly what happened.”
“Tell me what you do know, then.”
“You know about Erskine, right?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, the man always got what he wanted, and for a period of time he wanted Rick’s mother, Abigail. She’s quite a bit younger than I am, around forty I guess, and she was very pretty when she was younger. She came from another pack, married Rick’s father, Dean. He should’ve known better than to bring her here, but he didn’t have a choice. Erskine set his eyes on her, and what Erskine wanted, he got. No one had a choice.”
“So he raped her?”
“Probably. Then she just complied, like we all did. Erskine wasn’t in love with her, he just wanted her. She never left her husband. But she started drinking a lot after Rick was born. After a while it started to show and Erskine just... let her go. Dean tried to make things work again, but it was too late, then he died.”
“But the fact that Rick was being mistreated had to be obvious. Why didn’t anyone do anything?”
“Because of Erskine,” Zach said. “You don’t know how living here under his thumb was. How many people who tried to rebel against him we saw die. I’m not proud of the fact that I never tried to help him, but it could have meant my death, or my sister’s.”
Cole could understand that, even if he didn’t like it. He put his mug down and sighed. “Thanks for telling me. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
He rose from his chair and left the kitchen without looking back.
Chapter Two
Rick groaned at the sound of his alarm clock and slapped around in the direction of the nightstand. It took him three tries before he finally managed to hit the clock and blissful silence settled around him.
He buried his head under his pillow and wondered if he really had to go over to Kameron’s house. Oh, who was he kidding? Of course he had to go, even if it was the last thing he wanted to do. Cole deserved to know the entire truth before he did something stupid like moving to Gillham.
Rick could understand why the man was all starry eyes at the thought he’d found his mate. He was sorry he’d have to push Cole away, but Rick knew they really couldn’t be together. Who could want him? He had too much baggage—his stutter, his past, heck, even his present. He’d seen how Cole had looked at the outside of the house the night before and he didn’t need to be told the man had felt pity. How could Rick explain his mother?
Still, he had to go to Kameron’s house, at least to get the money the man had to give him. He’d earned it, and he needed it if he ever wanted to find a way out of his hellish life.
Rick groaned again and pushed his pillow away. He blinked, his eyes going to the door to check it wasn’t open. It wouldn’t be the first time his mother had managed to slip in his room while he slept in search of money. That was why he locked it, but sometimes even that wasn’t enough to stop her.
Rick Page 2