by Sable Hunter
Aron smiled, then his face crumpled a moment before he shook his head and composed himself. “Every moment of every day with her surprises me. I didn’t know such joy was possible.”
Nathan’s heart ached for his brother. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”
Aron looked at him, searching his face. “I pray you’re right, bud. I pray you’re right.”
After that solemn moment, they let the top down so the breeze could blow their troubles away. By the time they returned to Tebow, peace filled their souls.
…After saying goodnight to his family, Nathan gathered Lobo in his arms and retired to his room. As he entered, something lying on his bed caught his eye. “Oh, yea. The stuff for my dream spell. Thank you, Cady.” He picked up the note she’d left and read it carefully. “Hmmm. Okay.”
Following her directions exactly, he filled a glass with water, then wrote on a small peel-off label the word REMEMBER. Carefully, he affixed it to the glass. Next, he spread some herbs around a blue candle. “Mugwort, lavender, and lemongrass.” According to Cady’s note, the mugwort was to call the dream, lavender for deep sleep, and lemongrass to keep the nasties away. This made Nathan smile. “Nope, we don’t need any nasty nightmares. Only sweet dreams, please.”
Lastly, he lit the candle and visualized his intent. “I want to dream the same dream. I want to remember all of it, and I want to understand why I’m dreaming this same thing over and over again.” As the candle burned, he stared at the flame, reinforcing the intention.
Concentrating wasn’t the easiest thing, not with Lobo pulling on his shirt. Nathan kept at it, though. This was too important to flub up. As he drank the water, he poured his strength and determination into the manifestation. By the time the candle flame died down, the pup was sound asleep. “All right, dreamland, here I come.” Rising to turn out the light, he undressed. With hope in his heart he pulled back the covers, stretched out, and closed his eyes to sleep.
Nathan held on to Buck’s reins as he galloped through a field of wildflowers. Before him, snowcapped mountains rose to touch a turquoise sky. He didn’t know where he was going, but he’d know when he arrived.
When he came to a flowing stream, Nathan drew his mount to a halt and climbed down from the saddle. His boots sank into the thick grass. Lifting his head, the rays of the golden sun warmed his skin. On every side, quaking aspens were alive with birds, their song filling the air with music.
“I’ve been waiting for you. What took you so long?”
The soft, husky voice struck a chord within Nathan. He’d never heard this voice, yet it was as familiar to him as his own. He’d been waiting to hear it for so long. With great expectation, he turned to face the one he’d been seeking.
From the first glance, his heart leapt with joy. He went to his knees at her feet. She was the most beautiful thing he’d ever hoped to see. “I came as soon as I could,” he whispered as he held out his hand. “My name is Nathan. What can I call you?”
“Romy.”
She gave him a smile that made the earth move under his feet. “Romy, a name as perfect as you.” She was everything he’d ever longed for, everything he could possibly want. Her hair was long and honey gold. Her eyes deep pools of amethyst. Lips lush and pink. “I can’t stop looking at you.”
“Come with me.” She held out her hand and he took it.
“Where are we going?” It didn’t really matter, Nathan would follow her anywhere.
“To my home. We’ll be happy there.”
With complete faith and trust, he walked into her life. The touch of her hand in his was the sweetest homecoming he’d ever imagined. Along the way, she gave him gifts – what she valued, what she loved, what she dreamed about.
“I can’t wait for you to see my house. It’s not fancy, but it’s comfortable. I made many things I use each day. I love to use my hands and create beautiful things that remind me of the earth, the sky, and the wonder of nature.”
“Sounds amazing. I work with my hands too, but in a different way.” He held them out to show her how rough and work worn they were. She stole his breath when she stopped to take them in her own, raising one of his callused palms to her lips for a kiss.
“Romy.” The touch of her mouth on his skin caused his breath to come in harsh pants. He’d never known anything to feel so right.
Still holding his hands, she whispered gently, “I’m glad you’re here. I’ve been so lonely.”
“Me too.” He hadn’t realized how lonely until now.
Next, she led him to a small cottage deep in the woods. “This is my sanctuary. I hope you’ll find peace here.”
“Who takes care of you?” he asked, realizing there was no one here to keep her safe.
“I have friends.”
She clapped her hands and when she did, Nathan laughed with joy. From out of the woods came a deer and a raccoon. Through the air soared a hawk that landed nearby. But the greatest surprise was a rumbly grumbly cross between a purr and a growl as a huge bear came lumbering into the clearing.
“Who are you? Snow White?”
“Maybe.” She knelt on the ground as the animals gathered around. “They won’t hurt you.” Romy invited him to sit with her.
Nathan tried to take it all in. “You. This place. It all feels enchanted.”
“Thank you.” She laughed. “I like that. Life is short. It should be magical.”
“I agree.” He made friends with the deer and the fox, but the raccoon and the bear ambled away. “I have a coywolf. His name is Lobo.”
“I’d like to meet him. Now, for the rest of the tour.” She rose to take the path to her front door. Nathan fell into step at her side.
When she invited him in, he stepped inside slowly, anxious to know as much about her as he could. She showed him around, sharing with him the secrets of her days. “This is the fireplace that keeps me warm, and this is my stove where I bake my bread.”
Every word she spoke seemed to be precious. “I’ll chop the wood for you, I’m good at that.”
“I’m sure.” She touched his arm lightly. “You’re so strong.”
Taking his hand, she showed him more. “These are my books.” She ran her fingers across a wooden bookshelf filled with volumes. “And this is my piano.” Romy reverently touched an antique upright Spinet. “I love music from bygone eras.”
“Will you play for me?”
“I will.” She ran her fingers over the keyboard and soft, melodious notes poured forth.
“Show me more.”
“Okay.” Touching his shoulder, she led him deeper into the small house. “Here is where I take a bath.” She pointed to a tub. “And this is where I sleep.”
His eye was drawn to the soft bed covered in pillows and quilts. “Do you dream there?”
“Yes.”
“I dreamed of you,” he confessed to her softly.
“I know.” She went on tiptoe to kiss his cheek. “You’re dreaming of me now.”
Nathan shook with desire. “I don’t want to wake up.”
“No matter. We have all the time in the world.”
As if her declaration released a spell, time began to fold in on itself. Minutes became days and days became months. Months became years. During this time, Nathan and Romy became inseparable. They learned everything about one another. Their hopes, their fears, their dreams. The days they shared were filled with laughter and loving while the intimacy they enjoyed was sacred. Joyous. Rapturous. Nathan never knew he could love someone so completely and so well. Romy was his other half, his soulmate, his very reason for living. There was nothing in this world he loved more than her.
Every morning when he opened his eyes, her face was the first thing he saw.
Every evening when he went to bed, he held her close throughout the night.
They lived, they loved, they laughed. Their children called them blessed.
Nathan wanted no life apart from her. She was his everything.
Ring! Ring!
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“What?” The alarm brought him out of the dream with full force.
Nathan bolted up and opened his eyes. He turned to look next to him, his arm automatically outstretched to take her hand.
But she wasn’t there.
He was alone.
Springing to his feet, he shouted, “Romy! Romy!”
Panic stormed through him as he ran around the room. Where was she? And why was he at Tebow rather than…
And then it hit him, it was a dream. It was all a dream.
Only a dream.
Romy didn’t exist. She wasn’t real.
“Oh, God.” Despair brought him to his knees as tears flowed down his cheeks unbidden. His chest hurt so much he could scarcely breathe. He felt bereft. Empty. One moment he’d possessed everything his heart could desire and now he had nothing. Nothing.
Nathan felt as if his heart had been ripped from his chest. Bending double, he tried to take in air. His lungs didn’t seem to want to work. His mind struggled with how this could be. How could he live a lifetime within the span of a few short hours? How could losing someone he’d never known hurt so much? “I wish…I wish.”
He wished Romy was real. He wished he could live in the dream. And if those things couldn’t come true, he wished he didn’t remember the dream at all.
“What have I done?” he asked himself. In the span of a night, he’d known heaven – and now he found himself in the pits of hell.
Rubbing his forehead, he tried to think. What could he do?
He didn’t know. He was torn between wanting to dream again and never wanting to dream again.
“She seemed so real.” This thought led to another. “Could she be real? Did Romy exist somewhere? Waiting for him?” The not knowing was torture.
Needing answers, he dressed quickly, picked up Lobo and went to find Cady.
Much to his dismay, she wasn’t at home. She’d gone with Joseph to meet the Connelly’s at the airport. Putting on a brave face, Nathan continued on with his routine. He managed to act normal enough so Aron and Libby didn’t ask questions he couldn’t answer.
Before leaving the breakfast table, Aron caught his attention. “Hey, the ranch hand job is yours if you want. If not, you continue on as before. This is your home, that’ll never change.”
“Thanks.” He nodded. His brain was fried at the moment. He could barely process a coherent thought. Romy’s absence felt like a wound in his soul. “I appreciate you so much.” Without giving any more of an answer that that, he stood. “I gotta go. I promised Cruz I’d help him muck out the stalls today.” Mindless work, that’s what he needed. Something he could do without thinking.
“Well, hang close. We’ll all knock off early today to party.”
“All right, Aron. I will.” He kissed Libby, ruffled the twins hair, then made his escape.
After depositing Lobo in the stall, he found Cruz already at work.
“Grab a shovel, bro. And watch your step, it’s pretty deep in here.”
“Will do.” Nathan grabbed a tool and set to clearing the floor, shoveling the debris into two wheelbarrows.
“Hey, I heard you’re gonna be the big boss. Is that true?”
Cruz’s question took Nathan by surprise. “No, it’s not true. I turned it down.”
“Are you crazy?” The ranch hand couldn’t believe his ears. “Why would you do that?”
“I’m not the best man for the job. That’s all there is to it.”
His tone shut down any questions. “Whatever you say, boss.”
Nathan made a face at Cruz’s jab. “I’d appreciate some quiet. I really don’t want to think today.”
“Hung over?”
“It’s not that.”
When no further explanation came from Nathan, Cruz abandoned any attempt at conversation and the pair worked in silence.
The sound of a vehicle arriving drew their attention.
“Sounds like we’ve got company.”
Nathan kept working. “Let’s just finish up.” He didn’t know why he was in such a hurry. Nothing awaited him but sleep and he didn’t know if he could face another glimpse of a heaven he couldn’t reach.
“Hey, Nathan. You in there?”
Hearing Joseph calling him, he sighed and handed his shovel to Cruz. “Whatever you don’t finish, I’ll get to tomorrow. Okay?”
“Sure thing.” He clapped Nathan on the back. “Go have a good time – and for the record…I think you’d make a great boss.”
“Thanks.” He didn’t really care. His whole body was heartsick and sore from loss.
Before he could reach the barn door, Joseph stuck his head inside. “Hey, Nathan. Come say hello to the Connellys.”
Nathan wasn’t feeling sociable, but he gave it his best shot. If the smile on his face didn’t reach his eyes, maybe no one would notice. “Hey!”
Storm and Maddox Connelly came forth to greet him. “Nathan! Good to see you. I understand congratulations are in order.”
At first, he thought they meant the manager’s position. “Ah no, I…”
“Happy Birthday! Twenty-one is a milestone.” Storm bent to open his duffle bag. “We got a little something for you.” He handed Nathan a gaily wrapped box.
“Wow.” Nathan was completely taken aback. “You didn’t have to, but this is so nice.”
“We couldn’t let the occasion go uncelebrated.” Maddox came closer to watch Nathan open the box.
With Joseph looking over his shoulder, he tore off the paper. With curiosity, he removed the lid to find a finely crafted fountain pen with his name inscribed on the side.”
“Hope you like it,” Mad said. “I got it at this neat little place in New York.”
Nathan didn’t have to be told it cost a pretty penny. “I don’t know what to say.”
“Thank you would be a good start.” Joseph nudged him on the arm.
“Of course. Absolutely.” He held out his hand first to one brother then to the other. “Thanks a million. This is great. So unexpected and generous.”
“Oh, don’t mention it.” Storm put a friendly hand on Nathan’s shoulder. “We think so much of Joseph, we couldn’t let the day go by without commemoration.”
Nathan replaced the lid and held the box tightly in his hand. “I’m glad you’re here. Joseph has been looking forward to your visit. We all have.”
“Excellent.” Mad rubbed his hands together. “Well, let’s get to it. A little business, then a lot of fun.” He picked up his bag and headed for the porch. “Are you up for it, Nathan?”
The answer was no, but he said yes, anyway. “Oh, sure. We’re going to have a blast!”
…Later on that evening, Nathan kept himself on the fringe of things. Oh, he was friendly – he just kept to himself as much as he could. As always, the food was great. Joseph and Cady were excellent cooks. Joseph, the Connelly brothers, and the visiting athletes were through talking business and a deal had been reached. A sense of celebration was in the air.
“Hey, wanna dance?” Avery asked him, holding out her hand.
“Sorry, I don’t feel up to it.”
“What’s wrong?” she asked him with concern.
“Nothing.”
“You should’ve took Skye up on her offer to set up that blind date for you.”
“Ah, no. No thanks.”
“Well, I’m worried about you.”
“Don’t be.” He saw Cady crossing the pavilion floor. “Will you excuse me?”
Avery frowned. “Sure, but…if there’s something bothering you, you know I’ll do anything for you. Right?”
“Of course.” He leaned close to kiss Avery’s cheek – and the vision of her he received where she was wearing black leather and snapping a whip made him back up so fast he almost tripped. “I’ll see you in a bit.”
“Just remember what I said.”
Nathan assured her that he would as he escaped to catch up with Cady. “Hey, hold up.”
“Oh, Nathan. How did th
e dream spell work?”
“Too well.”
Picking up on his despair, she took him by the arm and led him to a bench at the entrance to the pavilion. “What happened?”
Nathan held it together – but barely. With soft words, he told her everything he could remember. At one point, his voice broke. “I love her, Cady. I love her as much as if I’d been with her for a lifetime. I know everything about her – from the lilt of her laughter to the small heart shaped birthmark on her thigh. I have no explanation, but I lived it. It wasn’t a dream, it was real.” He spread his hands apart. “Then, when I woke up – she was gone. And I was alone. I don’t know how to find her.”
Cady understood. “The dream hurt you, didn’t it?”
“More than anything ever has.” And that was saying something, losing his parents the way he did. “Yet, I wouldn’t have missed it for the world.”
“What do you want to do?” Cady asked, knowing he needed to talk.
“I’m not sure.” He bowed his head and looked at the palm of his hand where she’d kissed him. “I’m afraid I might never dream about her again, but…”
“Waking up without her was painful.”
“Oh, yes.”
Cady rubbed a caring hand down his back. “Well, you think about it. I can give you something to help you rest if you need it.”
“All right. Let me think about it.”
When he looked up Storm was approaching him. “Hey, Nathan, gotta minute?”
“Sure.” He stood as Cady walked away, then gestured for their guest to have a seat. “What can I do for you?”
“Oh, I understand you’ve been involved with almost every facet of the Tebow operation.”
“Yea, at one point or another.” Nathan shrugged. “I guess I’m a jack of all trades cowboy.”
“Best kind.” Storm leaned back and made himself comfortable. “You’re lucky. You grew up on this wonderful place. Every facet of the work comes as second nature to you. Not like us, we’ve had to claw our way. We’ve made some bad hires and some worst decisions.”
“I guess ranching has a pretty steep learning curve.”
“You can say that again.” Storm chewed on his lower lip. “I was wondering if I could ask you some questions about the Tebow breeding program.”