by Nikki Mays
“What are you thinking about over there?” Sage asks me with a frown marring her gorgeous face.
“Nothing. Why?” Shit, I must’ve spaced out a little.
She clucks her tongue at me. “Because you had a creepy grin on your face and you were chuckling to yourself.”
“I was thinking about Danny.” I blurt out.
She blinks rapidly a few times. “You were thinking about my ex on our date?” Before I can respond the waiter reappears with our dessert. The baklava with raspberries billed on top and vanilla ice cream makes my mouth water.
“I was just wondering if he would want to be friends.” I say taking a bite.
“You want to be friends with my ex?”
I nod my head. “I feel like he would be a good friend to have.”
Holding out a spoonful towards her mouth I’m a little surprised when she wraps her luscious lips around the same fork that’s been in my mouth. Slowly she chews before swallowing. The innocent move is so sexy. I wonder if…
“You feel like my ex would be a good friend to have?” I nod again. “Or do you think my ex would be a good friend to have because all three of our girls are the same age and about to start dating?”
Her questions pulls me back into the conversation.
“I feel like you’re trying to trap me somehow.”
She rolls her eyes to the ceiling dramatically. “I feel like every man in my life is a moron.” She drawls.
“So what you’re saying is that I’m securely in your life?” I’m good with that.
Again I feed her the dessert. Each time she eats it without second thought.
“I really don’t know how I keep ending up with the same type of man.” I hear her mutter.
When I can’t take it anymore I drop the fork and pretend to be full. But her words have made me curious
“And what kind is that? Amazing, handsome, charming, well-built and sexy as hell?”
“An alpha idiot who easily gets on my nerves.” She deadpans.
I tilt my head and take a sip of my beer. “Okay, not really what I was hoping that you were going to say, but I’ll take it.”
“I’m thrilled.” She drawls. “Okay, let’s say that you and Danny become new besties. Do you really think that you and my delusional ex will really be able to stop the girls from dating?”
“If all those hormone filled, walking boners are too scared to even ask them out?” I shrug. “Sure. Why not?”
Her eyes widen and she purses those delectable lips again. “You two are probably going to be great friends.” I smile at her. “Every idiot needs a friend to be dumb with.”
I lean in close to her. “Mark my words. We could definitely make it happen. There will be no little fuckers sniffing around.”
She leans in just as close, gives me a sweet smile and pats my cheek. “What you seem to forget is that you two fools are dealing with three teenage girls. Three girls who are more than capable of wrapping you two around their little fingers before squishing you both like annoying bugs.”
She leans back in her seat, raises her glass of wine and takes a healthy sip. “I wish you two all the luck in the world.” She takes another sip before mumbling. “You’re going to need it.”
I give her a smirk. “Don’t even worry about it.”
She snorts. “Oh, I’m not...trust me. I’m just going to sit back and enjoy the show. Really my hardest decision is going to be whether I should call Marc or Mason to videotape all of the awesomeness for me.”
I narrow my eyes. “You’ll see.”
“Oh, of that I have no doubt! It’s going to be a lot of fun to watch three teenage girls put my ex and my boyfriend in their places. Honestly, I am truly excited about these future events.”
Normally, I would be all about a good comeback, especially with someone who is so much fun to verbally spar with. But damn did she take the wind out of my sails when she called me her boyfriend. Damn that makes me fucking happy.
But we’re definitely going to need to talk about that term. I am way too fucking old to be considered someone's boyfriend. That sounds like something one of those little fuckers wants to call themselves in regards to my baby girl. Which will never be happening, so no need to think about any unpleasant thoughts.
But yeah, we’ll be having a long conversation about using the term “my man” when she’s referring to me. As soon as I prove her smug ass wrong about how well Danny and I can scare little shitheads and deal with the three girls with ease. Three teenage girls don’t scare me, I’ve got this shit. I’m pretty sure at least.
“Have I ever told you what a great idea it was for Danny to retire and open up a gym?” Kayla asks as she sits next to me drooling while watching Marc work out.
“So you’ve mentioned.” I sigh unhappily.
We’re at the gym and the center of our attention now is JJ. With every move of the weight his muscles expand and ripple as sweat rolls down his body.
Kay nudges my shoulder. “Why are you so grumpy? You’ve got a hot shirtless man to stare at who’s all yours.”
“She’s probably upset that so many other women are staring at her man and drooling.” My sister Lavender quietly states from my other side.
“That’s not it, Lav.” Though it’s definitely not helping to improve my mood. “It just sucks that we barely ever get any alone time. Between our jobs and kids, this is about as naked as I’ve gotten to see him.” I grumble petulantly. What? I’m horny...sue me.
Kay gives me a smirk. “So, Lav is right, it is the other gym bitches preening and drooling over your man that’s got your panties in a twist.”
Both the two traitors sitting next to me start giggling like we’re still teenagers. “No, it’s that I have an extremely sexy man that I can’t seem to get any alone time with. Battery operated will only get you so far for so long dammit.”
“My, my, how the tables have turned.” Kay says in a snarky tone.
Mustn’t kill best friend...she’s the only one who would truly help me hide a body without any questions.
“What are you talking about? And where the hell are your kids?” I panic because those four can get into some serious trouble pretty easily.
Kay shrugs carelessly. “They’re somewhere with Missy, Becca and Paige. I figured if anything, watching my little terrors is better than any birth control talk we could ever give them. After watching those four, I wouldn’t be surprised if they decided to stay virgins until they died.”
As much as I love those four and would love to disagree...I can’t. Those four are beyond a handful and that’s when they’re behaving.
I mean totally lazy on Kayla’s part to just throw her kids at three sweet, poor, defenseless… I stop and snort to myself. There is nothing sweet or defenseless about those three. Hell, all seven of them are equally matched in cunning and evilness. The only sweet one in the group is little Lexi and somehow the rest will manage to turn her as well.
Lavender is looking at us in what could only be described as complete alarm. “You left all seven of them by themselves?”
I roll my eyes. “You know the twins are like forty with their organizational shit.”
“Yes, but that just means that whatever mischief they all come up with will be well thought out and extremely organized.” Lavender states slowly.
Okay, I’m not going to lie, she’s got me a little worried now. And judging by the look on Kay’s face, so is she.
Kay shakes it off. “Come on Lav, seriously, how much trouble can they get into in a gym filled with adults? A bunch of whom are police officers. There is no way that even my little terrors could come up with anything.”
You know that feeling that you get right before something bad happens? Or when you just know that you somehow jinxed yourself by saying something that you shouldn’t have? Yeah, I’m getting that feeling in full force.
But, I mean, Kay has to be right. How much trouble can they all possibly get into when the whole place is filled with
adults and cops. There’s just no way.
Twenty-freaking-seven Minutes Later:
“How?!” Kayla shouts severely pissed off and I’m right there along with her. “Where did you all even get the red paint?”
“My guess is from the back room.” Danny answers from where he’s leaning against the wall. He’s trying his hardest to look stern and intimidating but I can tell that he’s about to start laughing at any minute.
Actually, looking around, it looks like everyone is close to losing it. Truthfully, I’m not too far behind them. For once, the kids being absolute little terrors, has kind of worked out in my favor. Not business wise but personally, it was great.
All seven have their heads down like they know what they did was wrong. Even sweet little Lexi is standing there holding Logan’s hand with her head down. Damn, when my girls organize shit, they really think of every detail.
And secretly, I’m thanking them from the bottom of my dark soul. They can make a mama so proud some days.
Lavender nudges me and gives me her stern look, with a shake of her head, like she knows exactly what I was thinking. Honestly, with parents like ours, you would think that she would be a little wild at least.
Kayla’s pinching the bridge of her nose but I know damn well that it’s not because she’s actually mad. This chick is trying so hard not to laugh. Did I mention that this kind of benefitted her too?
Marc being the only actual adult right now, which is really sad, gets down to the kids’ level. “What made you think that it was okay to throw red paint all over those ladies?”
They really are the world’s best little terrors some days. I’m seriously telling Kay that she needs to take them to Disney World for this one. They deserve it for being such good little minions and taking their orders perfectly.
Me? I’m going to start hinting to Danny how cute all three of the girls would look in matching cars. I may be a mom but I’m still a petty ass woman at times. And I reward loyalty when I encounter it. Like I said, I already know that I am definitely not getting past those pearly gates.
Abby steps right up to Marc so that they’re nose to nose. You can hear a round of snorts and snickers. Everyone who has ever met Abby knows that this will be good.
That sassy little doll doesn’t disappoint either. She puts her hand on her hip and gives Marc a nasty look. “Maybe it will teach those women” – she spits out like a curse “not to stare at someone’s daddy and husband.”
I hear the rest of the guys chuckling. JJ and Danny have tears streaming down their faces. Marc looks over at them with a raised eyebrow. “I don’t know why you two are laughing so hard. Abby didn’t come up with this plan all on her own. Your daughters didn’t seem to take too kindly to those women either.”
Danny and JJ look over towards the three girls who aren’t even pretending that they didn’t plan this out. The three of them are even in matching poses, arms crossed and chins up. They make me so proud some days.
JJ starts off with a constipated look on his face. “So, let me get this straight. You three,” He points to the teenage terrors who simply nod their heads. “convinced small, impressionable children to throw red paint all over women that you perceived to be looking at all of us. Do I have that correct?”
My Becca never disappoints. She steps forward like the good ring leader that she is and scoffs. “There was no perceiving anything. Those chicks were looking at all of you like it was an all you can eat buffet. Someone had to let them know that the buffet is closed...for good.”
“You know, some of us are still single.” Danny states because sure...that’s what’s important right now.
Missy gives him a disgusted look and holds up her hand. “Don’t even Dad. Those chicks looked just as bad as that stripper you “dated” who couldn’t remember that she was now Candi with an I instead of a Y.”
Danny looks around at all the guys smirking at him. “Don’t even give me any sort of looks. If you had been in my shoes, you wouldn’t have cared that she couldn’t remember how to spell her name either.”
“You’re such a role model for us.” Becca drawls.
He points a finger at her. “The woman I was talking to was asking if the gym offers personal training. I was literally talking to her about business.”
“Then how come she didn’t ask any of the women who work here? You know, the ones whose shirts say STAFF? Nothing you’re wearing states that you have anything to do with this place.” Becca retorts.
Hmm, got to hand it to her though. She has a point. We have a ton of staff working here and all of them are labeled as such. She’s right, there was no reason for that woman to be talking to Danny about personal training lessons.
I start chuckling and receive a nasty glare from my ex. I raise my hands up in surrender. “What? She’s got a point. There was no reason for her to be asking you about that. Face it, that chick was just another in a long line of your groupies.”
“We don’t know that for sure.” He tries to defend.
“A hundred bucks says that if we call her and ask her about Dad, she starts gushing like a total freak.” Missy decides to chime in.
Paige nods her head. “I’ll take that bet. But I’ll raise you fifty that she still comes in and acts all stalkerish, even after the paint.”
JJ’s eyes go wide. “When and where did you start betting on things?”
Without missing a beat all three girls turn and point to Marc. “He’s a really bad influence on all of us.” Paige tells her dad in a somber tone.
JJ looks over at Marc who doesn’t even have the decency to pretend like he had nothing to do with that. “Please, don’t go acting all high and mighty. You know damn well that you’ve got money on the Declan bet.”
“What is he talking about?” I ask my man who is suddenly looking very sheepish.
JJ rubs his delicious scruff before giving Marc a nasty glare. God Lord, and these men are supposed to have each other’s backs. “Well, see, Marc started this whole thing.”
Marc snorts and mumbles. “Yeah, always all my fault.”
Everyone turns to look at him with matching bland looks. Even the kids are giving him a look. “I’m not saying that it’s not true, but damn. Some of ya’ll can take the blame sometimes. It wouldn’t kill any of you.”
JJ gives Marc a look that either states that he’s stupid or pathetic. “Anyway, so Declan has been after this one woman, Erin, who’s a bartender at Home Plate for a while now. But the thing is that she’s a lesbian and has absolutely no interest in him. Which he hasn’t picked up on...for years now. Honestly, I’m pretty sure that I held out the longest on this bet. Even Erin has gotten in on the action at this point.”
“I totally get why he mutters with friends like you who needs enemies all the time.” I tell him.
“I felt the same way until I found out that the jackpot is up to like fifteen grand.” Kay tells me without any remorse what so ever.
I shake my head at her. “You’re such a bad friend.”
She holds up her index finger and cocks out her hip. “Loki and I are best frienemies, he knows the deal. Also, if it wasn’t for him none of the kids would’ve thought about doing this.”
“How do you figure?” Marc asks. I’m kind of curious how the poor fool can get blamed for something that he wasn’t even present for.
She gives us all a droll look and is about to speak before Rocco walk in and stops dead in his tracks. “Who went all Carrie up in here?” He asks with wide eyes taking everything in.
“That would be Declan.”
Rocco looks around. “He’s not even here.”
Kay nods her head. “I know and somehow he can still inflict complete pandemonium.”
Rocco tilts his head like one of those cute confused boxer dogs do. “I don’t get it.”
“The last time I entrusted him to watch the kids for a few hours so I could go and get some work done, he let them all watch the movie Carrie.”
“The red p
aint is making so much more sense now.” I comment. “Why would you leave him with the kids in the first place? He’s almost as bad as Mason.”
Everyone turns to look at Mase at my words. “Why are ya’ll looking at me like I’m going to deny it? We all know that I’m a horrible babysitter. They literally have the twins babysit me, when I babysit the other four.”
We all turn back to Kay, who damn well should’ve known better. She holds up her hands. “I was gone for less than two hours! Marc was on his way home from the range and the kids love “Uncle Declan”. As a cop, I figured that he would keep them alive. It’s not like he even had to feed them or anything. He literally just had to make sure that they didn’t play with fire, knives or the electrical outlets. That’s all!”
“I feel like your parenting skills have gone downhill since you’ve met Marc.” I tell my bestie.
Both her and her giant of a husband stare at me with matching nasty looks. “Considering who the true masterminds were, I could say the same for you when it comes to JJ.” She drawls as Marc smirks.
“Well, since Sage and JJ can’t be trusted to parent, I guess I’m going to have to step in today then.” Danny states very gleefully. Seriously, it’s creepy how happy he looks right now. I almost feel bad for the girls...almost.
“What does that mean?” Becca asks skeptically looking at all of us.
Danny gives her a smile that would even freak out a serial killer. “I’m so glad that you asked my sweet little girl. Since your mom and JJ seem to be lacking in the keeping an eye on the three of you department, I’m going to take over for a day or so.”
Now I would normally take offense to someone calling me a bad parent. But this is Danny saying it, so I know that he doesn’t mean it. Also, if I heard him correctly, he’s taking all three for a full day.
I can tell JJ is about to say something but I grab his arm to stop him. He looks down at me with a thousand questions in his eyes. I just shake my head and give him a smirk. I tilt my head in Danny’s direction, indicating that he should finish watching, what I’m sure will be a very entertaining show.