by Lindsey Gray
The shoot was special in more ways than one. Not only was Gwen able to document a blossoming love story, she was able to share it with her little sister.
At nineteen, Ellie Stanton was the most sought after graphic designer in Boston. A college graduate at seventeen, Ellie had started a graphic design firm and garnered praise from all over the world. Gwen had tried to bring Ellie with her on several important shoots to help edit some of the photos as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, this had only been the second one Ellie attended. Gwen was glad Ellie had chosen to come for this particular shoot, one where she would finally meet Emma MacLean.
Emma gasped. “Is that me?”
“It sure is,” Gwen replied.
“You are so talented, Gwen. Can you take all my photos?”
Gwen laughed at how serious Emma sounded. “I can’t take all the credit. This is my sister, Ellie. She’s a genius and can edit much faster than I can.”
Ellie stood and wiped her palm on her jeans before she offered her hand to Emma. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m a big fan of yours.”
“Thanks so much.” Emma smiled and shook Ellie’s hand.
“Ellie is a big supporter of the Nerdy Girl Nation. Her design firm has co-sponsored several events for the Boston chapter.” Gwen said with pride.
Realization seemed to dawn on Emma’s face. “Stanton Designs, of course. I can’t believe I didn’t put two and two together. You’re the one who has put up with Seamus all these years. Thanks for that, by the way.”
Emma and Ellie began a lively conversation about their similar pursuits. Gwen was never happier to be right about introducing the two women. She hoped Ellie would finally come out of her shell with a nudge from Emma.
“We are waiting for Mr. Breyer,” Phil informed Emma while he helped her into the SUV.
“Okay.” Apparently she didn’t have a say in whom her driving companions were anymore. She didn’t mind, but traveling in a confined space with Rob and the cameras was bound to be trouble.
“Sorry, I had to take a call.” Rob settled into the seat next to Emma, the dash camera aimed directly at the two.
“Are you going to the training facility?” Emma kept an eye on the traffic in front of them.
“Yes. It seems I need a little more training since I have some pretty competitive matches coming up.” They hit a bump and his thigh pressed against hers for a few seconds. “Sorry. Um … I’m meeting Chance. Phil said it wouldn’t be a problem to give me a lift.”
“Not a problem at all. I’m ahead of schedule for once since the shoot didn’t take as long as I had planned. I need to get a few things done this afternoon so I can be home on time.”
Rob shifted in the seat, turned his body toward her and draped his arm across the seat. “Something special?”
She stared at his uplifted brow and the quirk of the corner of his mouth before she responded. “Oh, dinner with the family. I haven’t got to spend much time with my niece and nephew lately.”
“You’re the fun aunt?”
“I’m not sure fun is the right word. Charlotte seems to think I’m pretty cool. Sam’s still a baby, so he likes anyone who feeds him or changes his diaper when he needs it.” She laughed a little thinking about the few times she had changed Sam. He was the first boy she’d ever changed a diaper on and boy, was he a completely different experience from changing a girl.
“So, kids? You see yourself having any?”
Emma gulped and felt her palms dampen. He was asking about their possible future without asking directly, the sneaky bastard.
“Well, yes, of course. I would love to with the right man.”
“And what qualifications would this man need to father your children?”
Her throat went dry in an instant.
He’s asking me this in front of the cameras. Is he crazy?
“I don’t think this is an appropriate conversation.” What could she say? She sure as hell wasn’t about to admit he ticked off every box on her baby daddy checklist.
“Sorry, I’m curious. You were with the tightass, the one who wore the fake Gucci suits, for like a year, right?”
“Yes. Patrick.” She rolled her eyes. What an utter waste of space he was. After the crap he pulled with her and Terrance, he would be lucky to get a job writing for a neighborhood newsletter.
“I wondered if he was the kind of guy you’d want to make babies with.”
The twinkle in his eye told her he was doing it on purpose. He was trying to rile her up on camera and get a reaction out of her.
“A big no. He was only interested in what I gave him and not at all what he could give me.”
“So, answer my question.”
“What do I want in a father for my children? A husband?” He nodded and she ventured to be as honest as possible. “Someone I can be myself with, I guess. I want a man who can put his wife and children first. Family is so important to me, especially since I lost my mom. He’d have to love them too.”
“What about you?” He slid closer to her, his knee touched her thigh. “Loving you is important as well.”
Christ on a cracker, she thought. They hadn’t even been on a real date yet, and he was talking about babies, love, and marriage. She thought while they already had a toe in the fire of Hades, might as well jump in with both feet.
“Of course. I wouldn’t be able to marry someone I didn’t love.” She took her opportunity to turn the tables on him. “What about you? Any wife and kiddos in your future?”
“With the right woman. I can’t wait to be a dad. I’m ready for the football practices, ballet lessons, bedtime stories, and all the rest. I loved certain parts of my childhood, but I would do things differently with my kids. Once I say I do, I don’t want to be separated for weeks at a time like my parents were.”
“What would you do differently?” she asked before she thought what his answer might be.
“When I was little, my dad was traveling a lot. We went around with him during the summers at first. The separation wasn’t good for any of us. Mom was still my dad’s manager and doing everything with him hundreds of miles away was hard. When I was about to go into third grade, we pulled up stakes and went on the road with dad year round. I was sort of homeschooled on the road for several years.”
“I had no idea.”
“Yeah. A bunch of the wrestlers had kids around my age. The mothers would take turns with each subject. My mom did most of our English and Math, but some of the others would do History and Science.”
“A little traveling school?”
He nodded. “Not much different from what child actors do on a set, I assume. It was fun, but I don’t think I’d want the same life for my kids.”
“Noted.” It slipped out of her mouth before she could even think. Heat rose up her neck with embarrassment.
“Would you be interested in applying for the position? I can assure you, the benefits package would be amazing.”
Emma gritted her teeth at the way he knew how to push her buttons, especially in front of the cameras. She thanked God and all that was holy when Phil pulled into the IWA parking garage. “And this conversation is over.” She gathered her bag and what little she had left of her composure before Phil opened her door.
“I’ll get you an application. I’m sure you’re more than qualified.”
It took everything she had in her to get out of the car without emitting another word.
“I have never had a more awkward conversation in my life,” Emma lamented to Annie while they prepared dinner in the MacLean kitchen. She was glad Ben and Al were off for the night. All she needed was them to catch her rehashing the conversation with Annie.
“The guy has balls.” Annie tasted some sauce from the pot she stirred and smiled. “This is ready.”
Emma stirred the pasta she was cooking and took a piece out to taste. “This is too.” She took the pot over to the sink and drained the water.
“I guess you’re not ready.” Annie wipe
d her hands on a towel and crossed her arms in front of her chest.
“For kids?”
Annie nodded.
“Not in the next nine months. In the next couple of years? Sure. I would like to have a husband first.”
“It’s not like you don’t have options, sweetie.” Annie smacked Emma on the butt with a towel when she passed behind her to get a serving dish.
“Don’t say Derek. Our ship sailed a long time ago.” A pang hit Emma in the chest. Derek entering her life again was nice, but she was afraid to go there again for more reasons than one.
“There’s Rob, too.”
“Ugh,” Emma grunted. “We work together. I’m supposed to keep things professional. The conversation we had today was so far from it.”
“Be friends first. You and Derek were friendly before you got together.”
“Please, do not compare this to anything I had with Derek.” Emma plopped down on a kitchen stool with a huff.
“Listen to me. I have limited experience with men since I was lucky enough to meet my soul mate while I was still in diapers.” Emma rolled her eyes. She remembered how Annie would always wonder off from wherever they were playing to go find Harry when Annie and Nell came for a play date. “But you showed me those pictures from this morning. Your face lights up when you talk about him. You’re falling for Rob and that’s okay. Falling can be wonderful, but the fall is only part of the adventure.”
“Yeah, there is the crashing and burning part at the end.”
Annie swatted Emma with the towel again. “Stop being so cynical. Take a chance. You want to.”
“What I want is irrelevant at the moment. I need to focus on getting through the next couple of weeks, starting with tomorrow.” Going back to her alma mater still gave her chills, but she would do it for the sake of the kids. “I’ve got Rob, Chance, Cherry, Peaches, and Cosmo coming with me tomorrow. Rob and Cosmo don’t get along, so I’m praying they can keep it together.”
“It’s not as bad as his dad was with Bill Bell?”
“No.” From what Rob explained, Big Bobby and Bill were still fighting as recently as a few months ago. “Say a little prayer for me, will you?”
“I’ll add you to my list.”
Emma answered her phone after she slipped into bed. “You are totally on my shit list.”
“Come on, baby,” Rob cooed. “I didn’t plan to talk to you the way I did, but I’m glad we talked.”
“I can see the tabloids now. Ugh!” She punched her pillow in clear frustration.
“Emma, I’m sorry the subject came up the way it did, but I’m glad I know now. This isn’t a short-term thing for me. We have a lot to learn about each other still, but I’m in this for the long haul.”
Emma hugged her pillow to her chest. “I need to keep reminding myself this is only for a few more weeks.”
“Right. After LA, we are going away for an entire week. I’ve cleared your schedule with Aaron and Kelly. If anything urgent comes up, you can do it over the phone or computer. If Chance and I advance to the tag team title match at Breaking Rules, I’ll need some time to recuperate.”
“Do I get a hint?” An entire week wrapped up in each other’s arms sounded heavenly but where would he take her for his grand seduction?
“Chance’s family owns a B&B with a full-service spa outside of Atlanta.”
“Seems pretty convenient since we are due in Atlanta the following week.” He must not want to go back to work until the last possible second.
“I reserved the deluxe package. We can lounge in bed, eat room service, even get a massage if we want.”
“Sounds like heaven.” She lay down on her bed and stretched her whole body out. The mere thought of any type of activity in a bed with Rob made her skin warm.
“It will be.” He laughed and caused her girly bits to tingle. “Get some sleep and I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”
“Don’t remind me. I can’t believe I’m doing this.” The closer the day came, the more foreboding she felt about the visit her alma mater.
“Not ready to go back to the good old days with Derek?”
“Not many of them were good.” A pang hit her chest so hard, her scars tingled beneath her breasts.
“You forget, I met you when you were in high school. You were the most amazing girl I’d ever met.”
He sounded sincere, but her old insecurities crept up on her. “You didn’t go to my school. The way people reacted to Derek and I dating was like I drowned their puppies after murdering their cats. School sucked most of the time, but the last few months were like a living nightmare.”
After her attack, Emma’s life only got worse. One of her classmates started a rumor she had made the whole thing up and injured herself to get sympathy. It made things almost unbearable. If not for the principal and her teachers letting her finish the year from home, she wouldn’t have passed her finals.
“I’m so sorry for everything you went through. You don’t need to go with us. We can go on our own.” The concern in his voice was evident.
“No, I made a promise to Derek. I’ll meet you there at four.”
“If you’re sure?”
“Yes, I’m sure.”
“All right. Goodnight.”
“Goodnight.” Emma ended the call and plugged her cell phone into the charger.
The conversation hadn’t gone as she planned. She hoped the memories of that horrific time in her life wouldn’t bring the nightmares back. A sure way to bring them back was to look in the box in her closet. The box she took with her throughout her various moves. She slipped out of bed and dug the wooden box out of the back of her closet. The lid creaked when she opened it, but not so loud her snoring father would wake up.
Each folder was labeled with a date. The first folder was dated just a few days after her attack. She picked up a tissue and pulled the paper out of the folder with it.
The same sloppy handwriting adorned every threatening letter within. Every threat include a picture of herself, her family, or her friends. Each letter differed slightly from the last, but the main idea came through loud and clear: stay away from Derek McInerney or she wouldn’t survive another attack.
Emma tried to stay away from Derek, but those first few years were hard. She loved him so much and needed the support he so willingly gave to her. The fear won out though and because of it, she eventually let him go.
Every time a new letter arrived her logical mind screamed for her to go to the police, but the threats stopped her every single time.
Emma returned the letter to the folder, closed the box, and returned it to the closet. Her hands were shaking by the time she got back in bed. She was so tired of being afraid. Afraid to turn over the letters, afraid to show affection in public, afraid to be the real Emma in front of the world.
Her mind would never rest without a little help. She went into the bathroom, grabbed a sleeping pill, and swallowed the little white tablet with a gulp of water. Curled up in a ball under her cool sheets, she eventually fell into a dreamless sleep.
“Hey.” Cherry grabbed Emma’s arm and pulled her back from the group on their way to the wrestling room. “Are you okay?”
“A little overwhelming. I haven’t been back here since I graduated.”
Cherry threaded her arm through Emma’s. “Were you bullied, too?”
Emma stopped in her tracks. The woman was twenty-five and in fabulous shape. Why would anyone bully or pick on Cherry?
“You think I always had this body?” Cherry waved her hand in front of herself.
“Well … Yeah.”
“Not even close. I didn’t sprout up until I hit eighteen. I headed right to the gym and I worked my ass off for this body. I still imagine those bitches’ faces on every opponent.”
Emma never supposed Cherry could be a victim of a mean girl squad. The cruelty from her own female tormentors she handled rather well. The guys were the ones who came up with sick and twisted ways to hurt her.
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br /> “I’m gonna get you in the ring with me, Emma. We are going to work out some of this shit. You need good work out, girl.”
“Thanks. Help me get through today. Please.”
“Of course.” Cherry wrapped her arm around Emma’s shoulder and hugged her new friend.
“Split into two groups and spar,” Derek told the boys on his wrestling squad. “Hopefully, our guests can give you guys some pointers to get us to regionals again next year.”
Derek walked over to join Emma, who was taking the scene all in.
“You’re great with them. This has always been your calling.”
“Thanks.” Derek slipped his arm around her waist, skyrocketing her nerves. “And is this your calling? Working for the IWA?”
Cherry and Peaches instructed a couple of the boys with a move while Cosmo let another boy put him in a submission hold. Rob and Chance chatted with a couple of the kids and showed off their muscles.
“So far, so good. This has been a unique experience, but I think working with Aaron is the right choice for me. I love being home. I’ve missed my family so much. I wish it could’ve happened a little sooner. My mom would’ve …” She stopped herself before she got too emotional. Derek had seen her devastated before, but she wasn’t ready for him to see her so distraught again.
Derek pulled her in close and kissed her temple. “Fate has a twisted sense of humor sometimes, but we’re all still here for you. I’m still here for you.”
The knots in her stomach tightened and the queasiness took over. If she didn’t get out of there for a minute, she feared what might happen.
“I need a minute. Mind if I use the bathroom next to your office?”
“Go ahead. I’m going to catch up with Bobby. I still can’t believe how he turned out.” Derek shook his head before they parted.
The cameras didn’t follow her as she went into the bathroom. She splashed a bit of water on her face; her despondency swirled through her head. One glance at her reflection in the mirror told her she wasn’t ready to relive any of her high school days.
“Just get through today,” she told herself. A motto she had repeated every morning before going to school as a teen.