Darcy smiled, “As I said, I will leave it to you to do what is best,” he told her. He stood up and took her hand in his as they walked over towards the garden maze. “Now, you did not tell me, do you approve of Windham House?”
Elizabeth nodded. “I like it very much. I cannot think of anyone who would disapprove of such a lovely house. The gardens are very beautiful; I imagine they will be truly magnificent in the spring and summer. I was mentioning that perhaps we might come back for a time during the summer so I might enjoy them then.”
“I think it is very likely, Mrs. Darcy, that we will spend time here in the summer,” he assured her. “As to what you said before; yes, the gardens are very lovely in the summer months. Perhaps not as beautiful as the gardens at Pemberley, but still very lovely,” he said as he guided her through the maze.
Elizabeth stopped and looked up at him, “William, I have already seen the maze,” she said as she turned to go back towards the house.
Darcy grabbed hold of her hand and pulled her back around towards him. “I did not bring you this way to show you the maze,” he whispered softly. “I believe I was promised a kiss if I came to join you,” he reminded her. “I believe we have a tradition to uphold, do we not?”
Elizabeth leaned in closer to him and looked up into his eyes, “Oh yes, you are quite right. I very nearly forgot,” she said just before he captured her lips with his. She pressed in closer to him and found that as their kiss deepened, she no longer felt the chill from the autumn air.
Caroline went straight up to her room and took off her bonnet and cloak, and tossed them both across the bed. She began pacing back and forth doing her best to keep her mind from returning to past memories she had worked so hard to bury. Listening to Elizabeth drivel on about love and marriage was beyond frustrating. “What does it matter what one hopes for in a marriage!” she said through clenched teeth. “Hopes and dreams never work as you imagine them anyway!” She took in a deep breath and fought back against the tears that threatened to come as she walked over to her dresser drawer and pulled out an old antique wooden box that held her past. She ran her hand over the top of it as she considered its contents. She took the box and walked over to her dressing table to retrieve a key she kept in her reticule. She carefully opened the lock, inside was an old and tattered diary she once kept. She removed the diary from the box and held it in her hands, considering whether she should open it, and relive the heartache that it held inside. Tears formed in her eyes as her thoughts raced back to another time.
It was not long after she had turned sixteen. Her father sent her to go and stay with her aunt and uncle. It was the first time she stepped out into society that she met Lord Geoffrey Ashworth. He was young, with dashing good looks. He had blonde hair, with captivating blue eyes, and she remembered liking him from the moment she saw him. She sighed just a little as she walked over to her mirror and sat down in front of it. Caroline leaned in close and examined her eyes and hair. “Has it truly been ten years already?” she whispered softly. There was a time when she was younger that she was considered by some to be very beautiful. But time was a cruel thing; her eyes were not as lively as they once were, and her hair had lost some of the luster it once held. She looked at herself and thought about him.
“Caroline, you have the most beautiful green eyes I have ever seen. There is an innocence about them that simply fascinates me. Each moment that we are together, I find myself more captivated by your charms. You are truly very beautiful,” he said as he leaned in and gently brushed his soft lips against hers.
Without even thinking, Caroline reached up and brushed her fingertips across her lips. Tears filled her eyes as waves of emotion washed over her and her stomach tied in knots. She looked down at the diary she still held in her hands. She knew she was in love with Geoffrey the first time they danced together. He was so charming, so quick with the wit and so very handsome. Caroline loved the way he smiled, and she hung on his every word. It was magical the way he held her in his arms as they danced. She looked back up at her reflection and swallowed hard as she stood up and walked back over to the box and placed the diary inside. She slammed down the lid and locked it shut before returning it to the drawer. She wiped her eyes and sniffled in as her thoughts turned to Darcy, and how she allowed herself to become so caught up with the idea of marrying him. She shook her head and wondered; how was it possible that she had so misunderstood his feelings? She assumed he was a sensible man, and when faced with the prospect of choosing a wife, he would clearly see that she was the better choice. She had connections, she was accepted into London society, she knew all the most superior people of the ton, and yet Darcy had settled for someone like Elizabeth Bennet. It simply made no sense to her. How could she have allowed herself to be so blinded by the past that she did not realize sooner that Darcy was falling in love with Elizabeth and not her? Caroline swallowed hard as she strengthened her resolve to keep her past and all the emotions with it locked away. “Elizabeth and her silly notions about love…” she mumbled to herself. “Love means nothing in a marriage. It is only position, connections, and wealth that hold any value.”
Chapter Two
Richard came into the study to find Darcy sitting at his desk. “I just received a note from my mother asking that we join them for dinner tomorrow evening. They are staying with Owen at Hallowell house. I did not want to respond until I knew that you have no other engagements.”
Darcy thought for a moment. “I do not believe we have any other engagements. You may accept for us,” he said.
“Very good, Mother will be happy to hear it,” Richard said. He hesitated for a moment before continuing. “Darcy, have you noticed anything odd about Georgiana’s behavior of late?”
“I do not believe so,” he commented. “Why, do you believe she is unwell?”
Richard walked over and sat down across from Darcy’s desk. “No, I did not mean to say she is ill, but rather that she seems distant and somewhat anxious of late,” he began to say. “She has become rather sensitive as well.”
“Have you talked to her about this?” Darcy asked him.
“I did try to speak with her yesterday,” he told him. “She was practicing her music, and I went in to tell her how well I thought she was doing. The conversation seemed to be going well enough until she became agitated with me.”
Darcy furrowed his brow. “Why did she become agitated? Did she give some reason?”
Richard got up and walked over to the window to look out at the street below. “Perhaps I upset her unintentionally. I commented that I thought the music she was learning to play sounded different, more mature. She mentioned that it was a more complex selection of music than she had ever played before, and I remarked that I hoped she did not feel as she has to behave differently just because Mrs. Darcy’s sisters are with us.”
Darcy leaned back in his chair and sighed. “Yes, I have noticed that she has gone out of her way to demonstrate how she is maturing. Do you think she is feeling distressed? Did she convey anything to you that suggests she is feeling unsure of being here in London?”
“I cannot say. When I spoke with her about coming into society, she became very defensive. I believe she does want to impress Mrs. Darcy, and perhaps that desire is causing her more distress than even she realizes. I was thinking perhaps we should consider leaving London and returning to Pemberley after Miss Bennet is married to Mr. Godwin,” Richard suggested to him.
Darcy nodded his head. “I will take it under advisement and speak with Elizabeth. Perhaps she can talk with Georgiana. The two of them have grown very close, and she may be more comfortable talking with her about these matters than either you or I.”
Richard agreed. “I think you are right about that,” he said. “Are you joining Mrs. Darcy this morning when they go to call on Godwin’s mother and father?”
Darcy shook his head, “No, Elizabeth mentioned that it would probably be best not to overwhelm Mrs. Godwin with too many new faces all
at once. Her sister Mary has asked that she accompany them, and I think that for the best right now.”
Richard nodded his head, “Well then, if you have some time free, perhaps we could go to White’s gentlemen’s club with Charles,” he suggested. “I thought perhaps some time away from all the ladies might be in order.”
Darcy laughed, “Why, cousin Richard, are you struggling with being around so many females?” he asked him.
Richard shook his head, “Do not mistake my meaning, cousin. I am just as fond of the fairer sex as any man,” he began to say. “However, I readily admit I am growing weary of all the discussions of lace and fabrics. I now know more about muslin that I ever hoped I would.”
Darcy laughed, “Yes, I think we agree on that score. Do not say anything to Elizabeth, but I find myself growing tired of wedding planning as well. I think I now better understand, at least in part, why Elizabeth’s father spends so much time in his study with his books.”
“I suspect a man living alone in a house with five daughters and Mrs. Bennet for his wife would very much need a place to retreat to,” Richard joked.
Darcy laughed, “I believe any man would.”
“Do you think Charles would like to come along as well?” Richard asked him. “I hope to spend the afternoon, perhaps even stay and take supper there as well.”
“I am sure he will,” Darcy told him. “Besides, I believe Mrs. Bingley is to accompany Elizabeth and her sister to Pembroke. Miss Bennet wished for both her older sisters to join her this first time she is to go to meet Mr. Godwin’s family.”
Richard smiled, “Miss Bennet is not very assured of herself, I think. It will do her good to have her sisters there with her.”
“I agree completely,” Darcy said as he got up. “You go and find Bingley. I will let Elizabeth know of my plans,” he said as he walked over to the door.
Elizabeth was just finishing getting dressed when Darcy came into the room. He smiled when he saw she was wearing the new pendant he had bought for her. “You look beautiful, my dear,” he said as he walked over to her. “I rather like this new dress; did you have it made when you went with your aunt to the seamstress?”
Elizabeth nodded her head. “Yes, I did,” she said as she finished slipping on her shoes.
“It suits you very nicely. I particularly like the colors; the reds and pinks brighten your complexion,” he told her as he walked over and pulled her into his arms. “Did you have the seamstress send the bill to me?”
Elizabeth shook her head. “No, I used my pin money to pay for the dress to be made. I like the fabric; the tiny red flowers set off against the pale pink I think is very becoming.”
Darcy furrowed his brow and released her from his embrace. “Elizabeth, you should not use your pin money that I give you for new dresses. I want you to have those bills sent here to me. The money I give you is for you to indulge yourself with as you wish, not to pay for things of necessity,” he informed her.
Elizabeth smiled. “I hardly think a new dress was a thing of necessity for me, William,” she admitted. “I just saw the fabric, with these beautiful little red and pink flowers, and wanted it. I did not mind spending the money you have given me on it myself. I paid for the fabrics and gave the seamstress what my aunt suggested would be a fair price to have the dress finished by today.”
Darcy walked over to the chair and sat down. “I know you do not mind using your pin money, but I do,” he told her. “As your husband, it is expected of me to pay your bills for things like this, just as it was for your father to do so before we married.”
Elizabeth laughed, “Oh William, my father could never trust my mother to have such freedom with the dressmakers. She would have run up such debts that could never be paid for,” she told him. “No, my father gave each of us pin money and a yearly clothing allowance that was to be used as needed.”
Darcy sighed, “Well, you must allow me to do these things for you. Otherwise, rumors will circulate that I am a miser who will not pay for his wife to visit the dressmaker.”
Elizabeth raised her brow, “William, are you cross with me that I did not have the bill sent to you?” she asked him. “I meant no offense by paying for it myself. It is simply how I have always done things. You were not upset that I paid for things from my pin money in Lambton.”
Darcy got up and walked over to Elizabeth. “London is different, there are those who will not understand you paying for your own gowns from your pin money,” he told her. “I am not upset with you, my love. But in the future, while we are in London, you must have them send the bills for any future gowns you might wish to have done sent to me.”
Elizabeth looked into his eyes and smiled. “I will remember to do so from now on,” she said. “Although, are you very sure it is wise to allow me so much freedom to the shops? Without my pin money to keep me in check, what will stop me from getting carried away?” she teased him. “Suppose I should buy too many new dresses?”
He leaned down and kissed her lips gently, “That is not possible, you do not have it in you to get carried away,” he told her. “You always show great restraint.”
Elizabeth reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Oh Mr. Darcy, have you already forgotten our first night together here in this very room?” she said mischievously. “As I recall, I did not show very much restraint; in fact, I believe I allowed myself to get very carried away in your arms.”
Darcy looked into her eyes and smiled as the very pleasant memory of their time together came to mind. “I happily retract my previous statement, Mrs. Darcy,” he told her. “In that one area of our life, you are very capable of getting carried away, and I find that I would not have it any other way. In fact, now that you bring it to mind, I very much look forward to this evening when you return from Pembroke, and I return from White’s,” he said as he kissed her again.
Elizabeth furrowed her brow, “Are you going to the gentlemen’s club while I am away today?”
“Yes, Richard asked if I might come along and Charles will come as well, I am sure,” he told her. “I shall be back before too late, although we will probably have supper there, I believe.”
Just as the clock chimed, Elizabeth pulled free from him and walked over to the bed to retrieve her bonnet. “If you are not here, then Kitty and Georgiana will be here alone with Caroline…” she commented.
“Is that a problem?” Darcy asked her.
“No, I do not believe it will be a problem,” she began to say. “Only Caroline does not get on with Kitty, and I hate to leave Georgiana in the middle of anything that might make her feel uncomfortable.”
“Elizabeth, before you go, that does bring to mind something Richard said,” he told her. “He mentioned how upset and agitated Georgiana has seemed to him of late. He suggested perhaps she is feeling overwhelmed by having your sisters here. I would like you to speak with her as soon as you can. Make sure she is all right.”
Elizabeth nodded her head. “Of course I will,” she assured him. “For now though, I do not want to keep Mr. Godwin waiting,” she said as she walked over to him and kissed him rather passionately before turning to leave.
Darcy caught hold of her hand and held onto it. “What was that for?” he asked her. It was clear her kiss had an effect on him.
She smiled and arched her brow, “That, my dearest Mr. Darcy, was so you would not stay too late at White’s.”
Darcey smiled as he let go of her hand. “I will return before you lay down to sleep, I promise you that.” He watched her as she walked over to the door, then he turned and waited at the window to see her get into the carriage. Just before she stepped in, she turned and looked up at him. Their eyes met for a moment, and he smiled. She really was completely wonderful in every way. Darcy took in a deep breath and watched as the carriage pulled away. He was completely satisfied with his wife. He had heard stories before from other gentlemen who would justify taking on a mistress after they married because their wives were so frigid. But
Darcy had no such complaint. Elizabeth was a most passionate woman and demonstrated her love and desire for him so freely that he often felt himself falling in love with her all over again.
Chapter Three
Mary held on to Mr. Godwin’s arm as he helped her down from the carriage. “This is a very lovely home,” she commented. The house was larger than Longbourn, with a beautiful garden set off to the side and a lovely parkway beyond that. “I am amazed that there are such lovely homes right in the middle of London.”
Mr. Godwin smiled. “I always thought it rather extraordinary that it should be so,” he told her.
Elizabeth commented. “Your family home is truly wonderful, Mr. Godwin.” The house itself was not as grand as Windham House, but Elizabeth felt it was more happily situated. It was not right in the center of London, but still not so far away from town to be considered the countryside. There were more trees surrounding the house, and some of the noises of London’s busy social life were dampened here. Mr. Godwin took Mary’s arm in his as he led the way into the house. Both Jane and Elizabeth fell in step behind them, allowing their younger sister to take the lead. Elizabeth leaned over and whispered softly, “I think Mary will be well. Mr. Godwin is so very attentive to her.”
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