by Vikki Vaught
Lincolnshire
Fall 1815
The summer passed, and then fall was upon them. Melody was almost five months along when she felt the baby move. She did not tell Henry’s family about the child. For some reason, she was fearful of them finding out. She was afraid they would make her come back to Sanderford Park. At the very least, she knew they would try to control her life, and their graces might even try to take her child away. The duke was such a powerful man that she decided she would not tell them about the baby. Melody was determined to have this child and give it all the love she had in her heart. She would make sure that her baby knew about Henry and how brave, kind, and wonderful he had been.
On the day of her first wedding anniversary, Melody spent the entire day out on the bench where Henry had proposed to her. She gazed down at her hand and rolled her wedding ring around her finger. She remembered the joy she had felt when Henry placed it on her finger. Oh, why, why did he have to die? Why was life so unfair? Henry was too young to die. She tried to let go of her grief, but it was just too hard. Melody was determined to never forget Henry, and she would make sure her child knew him. She lowered her head into her hands and softly wept for all she had lost. As evening fell, she finally got up and slowly went back into the house.
Melody spent much of her time with her parents and Brandon and told them all about her time with Henry. She found it calming to talk about him. The hardest times for her were the nights. That was when she missed him the most. Just thinking about never being in his arms again, tore her apart. Her mother was willing to listen to her whenever she wanted to talk, and she was so grateful that she had decided to come home. She missed Henry’s brother and sisters, but she knew she had made the right decision about coming home to her parents. Nelson had written to her and told her that he was getting married to Mary. They were planning a Christmas wedding. He wanted Melody to come, but she wrote back and told him that she could not travel because she was still not feeling well.
Christmas was particularly difficult. It brought all the memories of last Christmas and how much fun she had had with Henry and his sisters. She wondered if that horrible Uncle Theodore had come for the holidays. If he did, she hoped Kathryn would let Nelson know if he bothered her.
By the first part of January, Melody was very heavy with child and knew that her time was near. She went into labor on the fifth. The labor was hard but fast, and her baby was born after only six hours of labor. The midwife told her this was highly unusual for a first child. Melody was astounded when she first laid eyes on her beautiful little girl; she was tiny, and she had Henry’s red gold curls and his bright blue eyes. The tears poured from her beautiful eyes as she gazed at her daughter. Melody decided she would feed her daughter herself instead of using a wet nurse. She named her daughter Mary Elizabeth, after her mother. Everyday brought a new change. She found motherhood healing and began to feel the pain of losing Henry lessen.
She continued to spend time with Brandon. He was very good with Mary Elizabeth, and she was so thankful for his friendship. Brandon was still thinking about moving away, but she hoped he would not do that any time soon. Just having him there to talk to, helped so much. Since Lily had passed away last December, she and Brandon had that in common: Each of them had lost the love of their life.
CHAPTER 13
Spring 1816
IN THE SPRING, an influenza epidemic came to Little Smythington, and many people were dying from it. Melody was very concerned when both her parents came down with it. They were extremely ill. She kept Mary Elizabeth away from them, and as much as it pained her, she left the nursing of her parents to their maid Rosie, for fear of giving it to her daughter. Each day, her parents grew weaker, and their fevers climbed higher. A week after they became ill, Melody’s father passed away. Her mother was so ill that she did not even realize that her husband had died. Melody prayed constantly for her mother, and her fever did finally break, but she did not improve. The doctor did not expect Mrs. Canterfield-Smyth to make it because of the damage to her heart. Two weeks after Melody’s father died, her mother quietly passed away in her sleep.
Melody felt hollow inside; her grief was so awful that she could not even express it through tears. She buried both of her parents in the parish cemetery side by side. After her mother’s funeral, the parishioners came to Melody and let her know that they would have to find a new vicar, but she could stay in her home until a new one was assigned. She was in a state of shock, for not only had she lost her parents, she was also going to lose her home.
Melody met with her parents’ solicitor, and he read her their will. They left her all they had; however, it was just their personal belongings, some furniture, and five hundred pounds. She did not know what to do. There was no way they could live on that money for very long. She thought about contacting Nelson, but she still did not want to go back to Sanderford Park. Nelson was newly married and had been sick, so she did not want to bother him. She knew she would get no help from Henry’s parents, and they just might try to take her child away from her. The new vicar was to arrive in two weeks, so she needed to find somewhere else to live quickly.
There was a little cottage on the outskirts of the village, and they were willing to rent it to her for ten pounds a month. Melody and Millie packed everything up for the move. Brandon told her he would be willing to help her move the furniture to her new home.
It was so sad to see her home empty of all her parents’ belongings and furniture. As she got ready to leave, for the last time, she went out to the arbor, and all the memories of the day Henry proposed came flooding back. It almost crippled her; the grief was so intense. Oh, why did Henry have to die? She knew that she had to go on with her life, but sometimes the grief was more than she could bear. She held Mary Elizabeth in her arms and said, “My precious one, this is where your father proposed to me. He was the most wonderful man in the world. We’re going to cling to his memory for the rest of our lives. I’ll make sure you know what an incredible person he was. Now, my sweet one, let’s go to our new lives.”
Once she got everything moved, Brandon helped her get settled in and told her that if she needed anything at all, she should let him know. “I’ll continue to check on you a couple of times a week. I know that it’s going to be lonely for you out here.”
Melody appreciated Brandon’s concern, but she did not want to be a burden to him, so she said, “Brandon, I really appreciate all that you have done for me and for Mary Elizabeth, but I don’t want to be a bother to you. I know that you have your own life to live.”
“It’s no problem, Melody. Spending time with you helps me deal with losing Lily, and you know I’ve become quite fond of Mary Elizabeth. She’s like a daughter to me, and since I don’t plan to ever marry again, I can shower her with my love and attention. Well, I’ll leave you to get settled in.” Then he squeezed her hand affectionately and left. This was the first time she had ever lived alone and it frightened her to death, but she knew she had to stay strong for her daughter. Her life … had to go on.
Brandon came around every Wednesday and Sunday, and Melody would share her meal with him on those days. Mary Elizabeth was growing more beautiful everyday. Her hair was so much like Henry’s, and her eyes were as brilliantly blue as his; she definitely favored her father. She thanked God everyday for giving her Mary Elizabeth. Melody stopped answering Helen and Kathryn’s letters. It was just too difficult to keep the fact that she had a child from them, and now that her parents were gone and she had moved, it was even more difficult. She was afraid she would accidentally say something that would give her away. Eventually, Helen and Kathryn’s letters stopped coming.
The anniversary of Henry’s death was extremely difficult for Melody, especially because the village had a celebration in honor of all the brave men who fought and died at Waterloo. She spent the day remembering all the wonderful times they had together. She knew in her heart that she had to stay strong for Mary Elizabeth’s sake. Her life ha
d to go on without Henry, no matter how difficult it was.
It was very expensive to live, and by the end of the summer, Melody knew she would have to find some work to help make ends meet. When Brandon arrived that day, Melody asked, “Do you know of anyone who might need some sewing done? I need to find some way to earn money.”
“I do know of someone, but I have a better idea. I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something for a while now. I’ve been offered a new teaching position in Doncaster. It comes with a cottage and a decent salary. We’ve been good friends for a long time now. I know you’ll never love anyone like you loved Henry, and I doubt that I’ll ever get over Lily. However, we get along well, and I feel we are good companions and friends. Those are not small things, in which to build a marriage on. I think we should get married.” As he saw Melody start to speak, he raised his hand and said, “Wait, I know what you’re thinking, but you’re wrong, Melody. Henry and Lily would want us to go on with our lives. You need to think about what is best for Mary Elizabeth. I can offer you both a safe comfortable place to live. Just think about it, at least for a few days, before you give me your answer. I have to be in Doncaster by the middle of September. I know that would not give you much time, but I really think this would be good for both of us.”
“I don’t know, Brandon. You know that I care about you, but you’re right. I know I could never love you, because my heart will always belong to Henry. I do know this is probably what would be best for Mary Elizabeth, but I don’t know if I could ever be your wife in anything but name only. I’m sure you would want to have children, and I just don’t know that I could ever be a true wife to you. I need to think about this for a few days. I’ll give you my answer on Wednesday,” she said. Brandon nodded his head, came over to her, kissed her cheek, and then he left.
There were so many questions running through her mind. What should she do? What would be best for Mary Elizabeth? Her daughter was what was most important here. There was a need to give serious consideration to what Bandon had said, and it was important to decide what Henry would want for his daughter. She knew he would want her to be happy and safe. She hoped he would have understood why she did not want to go back to Sanderford Park. Nelson could be no protection now that he was sick, newly married, and expecting a child. That would mean their graces would control her life and her child’s, and she did not want that. They would probably mistreat her daughter, just as they had Henry. She would have financial security, if she married Brandon, and did she really want to live the rest of her life alone? She did need to move on. Nothing was going to bring Henry back, no matter how much she might wish it were possible. The logical thing to do would be to marry Brandon. There was no way she could support both of them on the money her parents left. It would be gone in a couple of years at most, no matter how careful she was. She knew she had two choices, either marry Brandon or go back to Sanderford Park, and that was not a choice she was willing to make. Melody got down on her knees and prayed that God would help her make the best decision for her and Mary Elizabeth. She decided to sleep on it, and whatever felt right in the morning would be what she would do. The Lord would show her the right path she needed to take. She wished there was more time, but she understood that Brandon needed to be in Doncaster soon.
Melody woke up the next day and knew she needed to marry Brandon. That would be what was best for Mary Elizabeth. She felt at peace with her decision. She knew … that marrying Brandon would be what was best for both of them. It would be what Henry would want her to do and what God wanted her to do. When Brandon came over on Wednesday, she would tell him yes. As difficult as it would be, she knew Brandon deserved to have a wife in all ways, so she would just have to accept … that she would need to be his wife, in every way.
When Brandon arrived on Wednesday, he greeted her with his usual enthusiasm and asked, “Hello, Melody, how are you feeling today? Have you decided what you want to do? Will you marry me? If you do, I promise we’ll take it slow. We don’t have to be intimate until you’re ready. I just want to take care of you and Mary Elizabeth. I promise I’ll be a good father to her, if you’ll let me.”
Melody looked at Brandon, and she knew she was making the right decision. “I would be honored and proud to be your wife. I already care about you a great deal since you’re been my best friend our entire lives, and I can think of no one, now that Henry is gone, that I would rather spend my life with, so yes … I will marry you.”
He took Melody’s hand, raised it to his lips and kissed it. “Thank you, I promise to be a good husband to you and a good father to Mary Elizabeth. I know you can never love me as you did Henry, and I’ll always love Lily, but I believe there’s enough love in our hearts to begin to love again, and I already do love you as my best friend. We’ll need to do this quickly. I wish I could give you more time to adjust to the idea of marrying me, but I need to be in Doncaster by the middle of the month. The banns can be read over the next three weeks. I’ll go to Doncaster and get everything ready for us. It will take me at least two weeks, and then I’ll be back. This will give you enough time to get ready and say good-bye to your friends. Is that agreeable to you?”
“That will be fine, Brandon. I would like to take some of my parents’ furniture with me. Will that be possible?” she asked.
“I’ll make arrangements to have everything moved to Doncaster. I want you to have whatever will make you feel better about marrying me. Well, if I’m going to get all of this set in place, I need to leave. I’ll see you in two weeks.” He took her in his arms and gently kissed her temple.
Melody and Millie packed up all her belongings and readied the furniture for the move. She visited all her friends and told them she was marrying Brandon. Some of her friends were shocked by her decision, because they knew how much she had loved Henry, but they wished her well. Brandon returned, and they were married on September 10. They had a small ceremony, just the two of them, with Susan and her mother as their witnesses. After the ceremony, they went over to Susan’s house, and her mother served them a light repast before they left for Doncaster.
Susan gave Melody a hug as she said, “I feel this is the right thing for you to do. I know how much you loved Henry, but you do need to move on with your life. I know you and Brandon will deal well with each other, because you have known each other since you were children. Sometimes, being friends is just as rewarding as a love match is. Please write me and let me know how you’re doing, and I’ll write you back.”
“I’m at peace with this marriage. It’s what will be best for both Mary Elizabeth and me. Brandon is an honorable, kind man, and I know we’ll be well taken care of. I promise to write, and please keep me informed about Nelson, Helen, and Kathryn. I appreciate you not telling them about Mary Elizabeth. I’m sure that it’s difficult, since you’re such good friends with Helen and Mary. Thank you for keeping my confidence. Well, it’s time for us to leave. Take care of yourself, and I hope everything works out for you with Arthur.” Melody hugged Susan as she took her leave, promising to write often.
Brandon helped her into the carriage and handed her Mary Elizabeth, then got in. She looked out of her window and watched as she left her home for the last time. She knew in her heart that she would be content with Brandon. After all, he had been her best friend all her life.
They arrived at Doncaster late that same day. As Melody gazed at the pretty cottage with a small garden behind the house, she knew she would be very content here. The cottage had an upstairs where the bedrooms were, and it was beautifully decorated. Brandon had done an astonishing job when he moved in the furniture, and it made her feel as comfortable as if she were in her parents’ home. He introduced her to the housekeeper, Mrs. Worth, and she told them that supper would be ready shortly. Millie went upstairs and unpacked for her and the baby. Mary Elizabeth was tired and started to cry, so Melody took her upstairs to feed her and put her to bed. Her daughter’s room was pretty; it had pink walls and a homemade throw rug on
the floor. Brandon had Mary Elizabeth’s crib and dressing table all set up. Soon her daughter fell asleep in her arms, and she put her in her crib. Melody took a deep breath and went back downstairs.
Mrs. Worth had supper on the table in the little dining room and told them she would be back in the morning and left. They were alone, and Melody was suddenly nervous. She found it difficult to swallow her food and just pushed it around on her plate. Brandon was eating with gusto, and he was soon finished.
Brandon leaned back in his chair and said, “Well, that was a delicious meal. You didn’t eat very much. Are you feeling well?”
As Melody stood up, she said, “I’m fine, just a little nervous. I think I’ll go on up to bed. It’s been a long tiring day.”
“Yes, go on up to bed. I think I’ll sit in the parlor and read my newspaper before I join you,” he said, then seeing her face he added, “Don’t worry, Melody, we’re both tired from the journey, so all we’ll do is sleep. I promised to give you time, and I meant it. You’ll decide when you’re ready to consummate this marriage. There is no hurry. We have the rest of our lives to be with each other, so relax, no need to be nervous, all right?”
“Thank you, Brandon. I’m tired, but I appreciate your kindness, and I promise I’ll be ready to consummate our marriage soon. I just need a little more time to adjust. I’ll see you in the morning.” When Melody went to her room, Millie helped her get ready for bed, and then she left her alone. Melody looked around the room and saw the bed, which had a pretty blue counterpane with white ruffles and she appreciated the effort Brandon had made to make her feel at home. She hurried and got into bed, and since she was so tired, she fell asleep right away. She never heard Brandon come to bed. When she woke up the next morning, he was already gone, but he left her a note. He had gone to work and would be home around five o’clock. When she went downstairs, she found Mrs. Worth fixing breakfast in the kitchen.