by Vikki Vaught
Henry finished feeding her, and she ate the entire bowl. Mrs. Worth said that it was the most she had eaten, at one time, since Mr. Foster had died. Henry was glad he was able to get her to eat. It was obvious that she probably had not been taking care of herself. He was anxious to hear Melody’s story, but he knew she was still too weak to get into it yet. He tried to conceal his anger and frustration, because he did not want to upset her, but it was very difficult, since there were so many unanswered questions in his mind. Mrs. Worth left the room and took the empty bowl with her.
Melody looked embarrassed and asked, “Henry, can you get Millie for me? I need her to help me get cleaned up. I feel as if I haven’t bathed in days.”
“Of course, my dear, I’ll go get her now.” Then he left the room.
Over the next week, Melody continued to improve, and she even seemed to put some weight back on, now that she eating again. Henry spent part of each day at her side. Their conversation was very stiff, and they were not comfortable with each other. He was trying to be patient and not show his anger, but he was failing badly.
Finally, Melody said, “Talk to me, Henry, I’m sure you have questions, because I know I do. Where have you been for the last three years!”
Henry was furious with Melody. How could she question him about where he had been for three years! He wasn’t the one that went and married someone else. How in God’s name could she have done that? Surely their love meant more to her than sixteen months of grieving. If she had died, he would never have married again. Oh god, the pain of all this, it was killing him to know Melody had been with another man. That was not supposed to happen. He knew he had to get his anger under control because Melody was still recovering from her illness.
Henry sat down in the chair, leaned back, and tried to relax. He took several deep breaths and began his story. “It’s a long story, but I’ll try to keep it short. I was injured at the Battle of Waterloo. I sustained a head wound and I was shot in the leg. I was found on the battlefield by some Franciscan monks. They carried me back to the monastery. There was no way to identify me because someone had taken my clothes, so I was completely naked. The monks took care of me, and I remained unconscious for almost a month. When I finally woke up and could talk, I had no memory of who I was. They nursed me back to health, but my memory didn’t return. Since there was no way to know who I was, the monks let me stay with them. I became their bookkeeper of sorts. After a period of time, I started to have dreams … of you I now know, and then some flashbacks of the battle. In late January, I was helping the monks repair a wall that had fallen, and I fell and hit my head. When I woke up, I remembered who I was and immediately thought of you. Father Francis lent me the funds to return to England.”
“But, Henry, that was months ago. What have you been doing since you came back to England?” she asked. “Surely, you wanted to see me. But … , maybe, you didn’t. Maybe you found someone else and just don’t want to tell me!”
Henry stood up with so much force that his chair tipped back and fell to the floor. He roared, “I’m not the one who forgot about you! You’re the one who forgot about me. God Melody, how could you get married to someone else. If the tables were turned, I would have grieved for you for the rest of my life!”
Melody burst into tears as she said, “I never forgot about you. I did grieve for you this entire time you’ve been gone. I can’t believe you could say anything like this to me.” She rolled over on her side with her back to him, and he felt terrible about yelling at her.
Henry sat back down and said, “This is not getting us anywhere. I’m sorry, I yelled at you. Let me continue with my story, and then you’ll understand why I didn’t come to you right away. When I arrived back in England, I immediately went to Sanderford House but found out that the family was in the country. I then traveled to Sanderford Park. When I got there, I found out that Nelson was dying and that my father was ailing. Then they told me you had left after you found out about my death. Helen told me that Nelson had taken you to your parents and that after about a year, you quit writing to them. I didn’t feel that I could leave because of Nelson. He died on March 10.”
Melody rolled back over and said, “Oh, Henry, I knew Nelson had been ill, but I didn’t realize it was that serious. I can just imagine how difficult losing him was. I thought the world of Nelson. I can’t believe he’s gone.” Tears rolled down Melody’s cheeks, and Henry sat down beside her on the bed and put his arm around her.
“I’m sure it’s a shock to hear of his death, but you can understand why I wasn’t able to come to you right away. After his funeral, I left to go to London and speak with your aunt Miriam. When I got there, I found out that she was out of the country. I then went to see your friend Susan, but she was unavailable. I received a message from my mother, telling me that my father had had a heart attack and that I needed to return home at once. Father died on April 5,” he said.
Melody gasped as she exclaimed, “Oh no, not your father too! How awful it must have been for you to come home and find me gone, Nelson dying, and then to lose your father too! I’m so sorry, Henry. Oh goodness, that means you’re now the duke! Oh lord, that means I’m … a duchess, doesn’t it?” Melody started crying even harder, and Henry tried to comfort her, but he felt uncomfortable because his anger was still seething right under the surface. He had to stay calm so they could get through this.
He patted her on the shoulder and said, “It’s going to be all right. We’ll get through all of this somehow. It took me weeks to get everything settled so that I could come for you. When I arrived, I found out that, your parents had died and that you had moved to Doncaster. That’s when I came here, found out that you had married again, and you were gravely ill. Melody, why didn’t you contact my parents when yours passed away? You know they would have taken care of you. You didn’t return any of my solicitor’s letters. You had inherited everything that I owned. There was no reason you should have felt compelled to marry to survive. What were you thinking?” Henry stood up and began pacing the room as he continued, “I don’t understand why you felt so desperate that you had to marry or starve as your maid so politely put it. Please explain to me what you were thinking because, for Christ’s sake, I don’t know!”
With tears rolling down her cheeks, she took a deep breath as she said, “I was devastated when I received the news of your death. After the funeral, I just wanted to go home to be with my parents. Nelson took me. He was so patient and kind to me, but I found it too difficult to be around him because he looked so much like you. I asked him to leave. I was exhausted because I had cried the whole way to my parents. They called in the doctor, and that is when I found out that I was with child. At first, I was so ill that I couldn’t even think straight. Finally, I started feeling better physically. I was so pleased that I was going to have your child. I knew I would always have a small part of you through the baby. I was just going to wait a little while, and then I would write to your family and tell them about the baby. Each letter I received, I would answer, planning on telling them in my next letter, but then I started to get scared, so I didn’t tell them. Henry, I never got any letters from your solicitor. God knows, I would have answered a letter like that, especially after my parents died. I was afraid that when your parents found out about the child, they would take her away from me. You have to understand, Henry. Your father was a very powerful man, and I knew he detested me. I became convinced that I could never tell them about our child. Several months after she was born, I quit answering their letters altogether because I was afraid I would say something accidentally, and then they would come and take my daughter. As you found out, my parents both died that spring. The house was owned by the church, so I couldn’t continue to stay there. My parents left me five hundred pounds, and that was all I had to my name, aside from their personal belongings and some furniture.”
Henry continued to pace furiously back and forth, as he interrupted, “You couldn’t have been thinking! I
would never leave you without resources!”
“That may be true, but at the time, that was what I thought. Now do you want to hear the rest of my story or not?” Melody asked.
“Yes, by all means, please continue!” Henry sat back down in the chair, folded his arms across his chest, and waited for her to continue. He tried to get his temper back under control because he knew Melody was still very weak from her illness and the last thing he wanted to do was upset her and make her sick again.
Melody leaned back on her pillow, looking so pale and weak that it made his heart ache. Oh why did this have to happen? Then she slowly continued, “I found a small cottage on the edge of town and moved there. My friend Brandon helped me move. As you already know, he had lost his wife, so we gained comfort from each other. He would come to check on me a couple of times a week. When he was offered the position in Doncaster, he didn’t want to leave me alone, so he asked me to marry him. I didn’t want to marry him because I knew that I could never love him. He told me he knew I would always love you but pointed out to me that you were gone, and nothing would bring you back to me. At least, we cared for each other, and there were worse reasons to marry than friendship. I considered writing to your brother, but I knew he was newly married, and I was afraid he wouldn’t have time to protect me from your parents. I didn’t want to have Mary Elizabeth grow up without a father. I tried to think of what would be best for her. That’s why I married Brandon. It wasn’t a love match, but I knew he would make a good father for Mary Elizabeth. My marriage to Brandon was comfortable; he was a wonderful father, a good husband, and he was my best friend. If I had had any idea that you weren’t dead, I would have waited forever, but I have always been a very practical woman and knew I had to move on with my life. I hope you can understand why I married him.”
Henry leaned forward, ran his fingers through his hair, and said, “I still don’t understand why you were so afraid of my parents. Nelson would never have let them take your child. He would have protected you and Mary Elizabeth with his life. You should have had more faith in him than that. I’m very curious as to why you didn’t get my solicitor’s letters. Did you think that I would die and leave you without anything? I can’t believe that you would be so slow-witted. You should have known better!”
Melody sat up straight and, with incredulity on her face, said, “I don’t know why I didn’t get those letters, and I am not slow-witted! I was so distraught when you died that I wasn’t thinking clearly. We never discussed finances, so I had no idea what you owned or how much money you had. I didn’t even know who your solicitor was! You should have made sure I was aware of all that before you went off to war! I’m not to blame here. I only did what I thought I must! I’m sorry, Henry, but I did what I felt was best for Mary Elizabeth and myself. I don’t know what else to say. I’ll understand if you don’t want to stay married to me. I’m sure there must be some way that we can end our marriage without a scandal.”
Now Henry really felt ready to explode, but he took some deep cleansing breaths, stood up, and started pacing the room again as he derisively said, “Melody, that is ridiculous! Of course, I don’t want out of our marriage. Even though I’ll probably never understand why you did what you did, you are still my wife, and you will be so until the day you die. So, I’ll hear no more talk about ending our marriage. We’ll get through this some way. You are right, though. I should never have gone off to war and not explained everything to you about our finances. I guess I was so concerned about what was happening that I didn’t think of the future or what would happen if I were to die. I’m sorry for that, but you still should have realized that I wouldn’t have left you without resources.”
With sadness written all over her sweet face, she leaned back on her pillow again and sighed and then she said, “We aren’t going to get anywhere like this, so we need to just try to move past what has happened. Neither of us can go back and change anything, so it serves no useful purpose to continue to argue about this. I need to concentrate on getting my strength back. Henry, you need to be very sure that you don’t want out of this marriage. I’ll make a very poor duchess. It’s not something that I ever wanted.”
Henry belligerently looked at her and said, “Well, I never expected to be the duke either, but here I am, and I have no choice but to meet my obligations head-on, and so will you. You have no choice either. I’m sure we will learn how to handle our new responsibilities as time goes on. The important thing now is to get you well. So you’re right, we won’t talk about this anymore. Later, after we get back to Sanderford Park, we can sort it all out.”
CHAPTER 18
June 1818
HENRY KNEW THAT they could not end their marriage, and he did not want to anyway. He knew he would need to find someway to get past the fact that Melody had married, and worse than that, she had given her body to Brandon. He had liked Brandon, but that did not mean he wanted to share Melody with him. When he spoke with her the next day, he said, “Melody, we have to stay together. We are legally married, and the only way we could end our marriage would be for me to accuse you of adultery, and neither one of us would want to live through a scandal like that. Both of us need to put Mary Elizabeth’s best interests first, and it would definitely not be beneficial to her if her parents went through a nasty divorce. There will be no further discussion about ending our marriage. I’d much rather talk about my beautiful daughter. I’m a bit overwhelmed by the thought of fatherhood, but I’m thrilled about Mary Elizabeth. I do hope she will warm up to me eventually, and I’m sure she will. We’ll just take everything one day at a time. Once you’re fully recovered, we’ll return to Sanderford Park.”
Melody gazed at Henry as she said, “Henry, I need time to get used to you being alive, and I need you to be patient with me while I adjust. I’m overjoyed you survived, but, nonetheless, it’s all very overwhelming. However, my feelings for you are just as strong as they were before you left for the continent. I agree that we need to take things one day at a time, and I’m sure we’ll be fine soon.”
Leaning forward in his chair, he replied, “I understand that all of this is rather shocking. It’s unusual for someone to come back from the dead. I just hope it doesn’t take you long to adjust because I want you to fully be my wife again in every sense of the word.”
They stayed in Doncaster for two weeks so that Melody could regain her strength again. Since Melody’s house was so small, he stayed at Doncaster Stables. He spent part of each day with her so they could get to know each other again. Mary Elizabeth did not want to have anything to do with him. Melody tried to talk to her, but she refused to believe that he was her father. She kept insisting that her papa was in heaven with the angels. Little Brandon was too small to understand, so he seemed to accept Henry without question. Henry found some coaches at Doncaster Stables, had them repaired, and made ready for the long journey.
Millie and Mrs. Worth packed up the cottage. Since Mrs. Worth’s children were all grown and her husband was gone, she decided to come with them as the children’s nurse, which pleased Melody immeasurably, since she had grown quite fond of her.
They left Doncaster the first part of June. Henry and Melody rode in the main carriage, and the children rode with Millie and Mrs. Worth in the second carriage. The trip was long and exhausting, mainly because of the children, and Melody still grew tired easily, so they could not travel very far each day. Henry suspected that the upheaval of it all was why Melody was recovering so slowly. At least, she was finally putting some of her weight back on, but she was still far too thin. He was still trying to move on from what he saw as a betrayal. Henry knew he should not feel so resentful that she had moved on with her life, but dammed, if he could just forget it. He could tell that Melody knew he had not forgiven her, and he knew that it bothered her. They tried to converse, but it was uncomfortable for both of them. Melody ended up reading or doing needlework, and he either read the newspaper or pretended to sleep. Every night, when they stopped at
an inn, Melody would retire to her room and have a tray sent up. She would spend time with the children, and then she would go to bed. Henry would eat alone in the dining room, and then he would drink until he felt he could go to sleep. He had never really been much of a drinker, but it was the only way he could sleep without dreaming, and he was getting damned tired of living in a perpetual state of arousal.
By the time they were close to Sanderford Park, the children were inordinately irritable, and had been crying for days. Finally, they arrived. All the servants were lined up to greet them as Henry had sent word that he was bringing Melody home.
Once the children were in the nursery, Henry left Melody in their rooms and went to find his mother. As soon as he started talking to her, it was obvious she was back to her old vindictive self again. He should have known it was too good to last. She was not willing to accept Melody back into the fold. Henry tried to be patient as he said, “I need you to accept Melody and treat her with the respect she deserves as my duchess and wife. You have a beautiful granddaughter named Mary Elizabeth. When Melody thought I was dead, she married her best friend, Brandon Foster. They had a child, and his name is Brandon. I expect you to treat him as if he were your grandchild in truth. He is not to blame for this situation.”
His mother looked furious. She stood up, came over to him, and said vehemently, “You are entirely too accepting of what Melody has done. You need to be very careful that she does not wrap you around her little finger again. How can you be sure that this Mary Elizabeth is even your child? At least she is a girl, so she will not be able to inherit.”
Henry looked directly into his mother’s eyes and said, “There is no doubt about Mary Elizabeth’s parentage. For one thing, the timing alone shows that she’s my daughter, and besides, she looks just like Helen. So you can put that idea out of your mind.”