“I don’t have one,” he whispers, shaking his head as his forehead rests against mine. “I can pull out,” he says, and even though I know I should say ‘no’ and do this the safe way, all logic is gone.
“Okay,” I agree in a hushed whisper, afraid that talking at a normal volume might break the spell we’re under.
When I say that, he thrusts his hips into me and pushes his way past the resistance. The moment he’s inside, I call out as I dig my nails into his shoulders. Pain overtakes me, but it’s a pain I love. It’s like finally getting something you didn’t even know you needed, and already, I can feel my release starting to build with a white-hot tingling sensation.
“Fuck,” he breathes out against my lips. “You’re so tight. Let me know if I’m hurting you,” he says, refusing to move an inch.
“Keep going,” I beg, bringing his lips back to mine.
With that, he pulls his hips back slowly and sends them flying into me again. My eyes close with the pleasure, and even though I’ve forgotten every single thing I’ve ever learned in my lifetime, I remember how to kiss—it’s instilled in me like the need to breathe.
His hands are on my hips, holding me to him. He pulls me into each thrust, making them hit harder, go deeper. His mouth falls from mine, teeth scraping their way down my jaw and neck. One arm moves around my lower back, making it arch into him as my breasts rub against his chest. The sensation makes my nipples harden and tingle with pleasure.
“Fuck, Cora . . . you feel too good,” he breathes out between gasps.
A sensation starts to build in my lower stomach when my sensitive nub starts to rub back and forth against his pubic area. It adds to the pleasure, and before I know it, I’m falling over the edge of the earth. My lungs freeze as the fire rips through my body. My heart races harder and faster as each nerve ending is hit like a punching bag. I call out his name and his hips only move more rapidly, driving me home. Gasps, moans, whimpers, and pleas all fall from my lips as he takes over my body. His hips start to become jerky, less precise, and more wild. Every muscle in his body hardens, and the next thing I know, he’s pulling out of me with a loud moan until he’s emptied himself onto the shower floor.
“Oh, fuck,” he breathes out, resting his forehead against my shoulder. “I’m sorry. I tried to hold out longer so you could finish, I just . . . couldn’t. You felt too good,” he says between labored breaths.
I smile at that. No guy I’ve ever been with has ever said those words to me. Plus, I did finish . . . it just got cut a little short. I think all these years of not having orgasms somehow ended up compounding my need—resulting in long-lasting orgasms.
“I’m not,” I say, causing him to look up at me. “Sorry, that is.” He lets out a silent chuckle before kissing my lips one last time and setting me on my feet.
The two of us get cleaned up and pull on some fresh clothes before leaving the shower house. When we open the door, there are two teenage kids standing outside the door, waiting. When they see us, they both break into giggles and wide smiles.
The braver one says, “Sounded like you guys had some fun in there.” And it causes the other guy to laugh at his friend’s smart-ass comment.
Grayson just shrugs. “Well, now you know what you have to look forward to.” He’s clearly hinting at the kid’s virgin status due to his smart mouth and Star Wars T-shirt.
The guy’s smile drops, but then he looks at me. “I mean, if she’s offering, man.”
We’d already started walking by the time he said that. Grayson pulls his hand out of mine and turns back. “What did you say?” he asks, looking down at the kid who’s probably 16 or 17.
“Grayson,” I say, walking up to him and wrapping my hand around his arm.
“I didn’t mean anything by it, man. Sorry,” the kid says.
Grayson takes a moment to stare him down, but we both know he isn’t going to do anything. These are just a couple of mouthy kids. But that doesn’t stop him from scaring him straight. Finally, Grayson lets his stare drop and he turns, puts his arm around me, and restarts our walk back to camp.
I giggle and shake my head.
“What?” he asks around his smirk.
“Since when did you become my protector?”
“I’ve always been here to protect you, Cora. You just didn’t see it until now,” he says, and it makes me wonder if it’s really true. Has he had to protect me at work from our coworkers? Have they been saying things since I was left at the altar?
Who cares what they think anyway? I’m done worrying about all of that. For the first time in my life, I’m happy. Truly happy. And Grayson has so much to do with that. I don’t know where I’d be right now if he hadn’t stolen that notebook out from under my arm that day, and I thank God every day that he did.
When we get back to camp, the fire is going down, so he throws on a couple more logs. Then he pulls out a spare blanket and lays it down on the ground nearby. I grab us each a beer out of the cooler and go to lie at his side. He puts his arm down and I rest my head on it and curl into his chest. His heat warms me, and again, I’ve never felt more comfortable or more secure. I breathe his scent in deeply and let it wash over me like fresh rain.
“I’ve always loved the way you smell,” I say, thinking out loud.
“Oh yeah?” he asks, glancing down at me. “I’ve always loved your smell too,” he replies, pressing a kiss to the top of my head, and that right there speaks a thousand words. A kiss on the forehead isn’t like a regular kiss. It isn’t trying to get sex. It isn’t for the feeling it brings the kisser. It’s all about the person being kissed. He’s showing me how he feels without saying the words, and it leaves me wondering if that’s the way it’s always been. Has he always had feelings for me? Do I have feelings for him? I guess I do, but are they real, or have they been brought on by all this closeness we’ve suddenly shared?
As we lie on the ground and stare up at the stars, I think back on our friendship. Most guys become friends with a girl because they like them, but Grayson never seemed to want me. He was always just there, making me smile when I hadn’t in a while. He gave me a shoulder to cry on when he sensed I needed it. And he’s been a listening ear without complaining or trying to give me advice. He’s always just been here—a constant. Why didn’t I see it before? Why didn’t I see it and kick Jimmy to the curb before going through with planning a wedding?
Jimmy and Grayson couldn’t be any more different. Jimmy is nothing compared with Grayson. He was cocky for no good reason. He wasn’t exceptionally good-looking. He didn’t have a good job or money. Hell, he wasn’t even good in bed. He treated me like shit and never cared about me or my feelings. Yet, all along, I’ve had Grayson, who is all of those things. I want to kick myself for not seeing it sooner. But now that I have, what am I going to do about it? Am I going to continue to keep playing this game with him, or am I going to do what he says I should do? Reach out and take it. Take him.
Eight
Grayson
Fuck. Every day, I’m falling more and more in love with this woman and I have no fucking idea what to do about it. I feel like she’s moving on from the heartbreak that asshole caused her, but that doesn’t mean she’s ready to jump into another relationship—not when her trust is so low. I just keep holding on and hoping that sooner or later, she’ll realize she loves me too. I know she does. I can feel it when we touch, when we kiss, and when she holds me against her. Maybe after what we did in the shower, she’ll start to analyze it herself. Maybe she’ll see that I’ve never been by her side as a friend, but as a lover. Maybe she’ll even see that she loves me too.
I can only hope.
The night is clear—not a cloud in the black sky that’s filled with millions of tiny, brightly-lit stars. There’s a light breeze, but not enough to make the night cold. And with the fire going as I hold her next to me, I’m toasty-warm and ready to drift off to sleep. That is, until she rolls on top of me. I place my hands on her thighs and look up at her with a smil
e.
She’s wearing my hoodie over a pair of tiny shorts, and she looks even smaller. She tilts her head to the side and her cheeks turn pink. “I’ve never been on top,” she confesses, and then she’s leaning down to press her lips to mine, and that’s all it takes. If she wants to be in control, then I’ll let her be in control. I can’t imagine doing it any other way.
I kiss her for a moment before cutting it off. “Let’s go in the tent and you can show me what you got.”
She nods and stands up, stepping back and giving me room to stand with her. I grab the blanket off the ground so the wind doesn’t blow it into the fire, and I toss the wadded-up ball to the ground next to the tent as we’re climbing in. I drop to my knees and zip it up. When I turn around, she has the hoodie pulled up over her head as she removes it. While her head and arms are still tangled in it, I tackle her, taking her down to the ground softly in my arms. She giggles as she wiggles out of the hoodie, and the moment I suck a nipple into my mouth, she lets out a whimper that brings my body to life all over again.
Her hands land on my chest and she pushes me onto my back. Then she swings a leg over me and sits on my hips. Her hands slip under my shirt and move upward, taking the shirt with her. When it’s up to my neck, I lift my head and reach behind it to pull it off.
She looks down at me and bites her lip. “I’m not really sure what to do up here.”
I reach for her, cupping her face in my hands. “Do whatever you want. You’re in control,” I tell her, bringing her lips to mine. She kisses me for a moment before pulling away, then she kisses my neck and lightly bites my earlobe. My dick twitches with excitement.
She kisses her way down my neck to my chest, flicking her tongue against my nipple and making goosebumps prickle my skin. She kisses lower, past my belly button and to the top of my shorts. She hooks her fingers underneath and looks down at me. “I haven’t done this either, so tell me if I’m doing it wrong.” She jerks down my shorts and I spring free. A moment later, she’s sliding me into her hot, perfect mouth.
At first, she’s shy. She takes her time moving me in and out of her mouth. But as the moments pass, she gets more comfortable and her tongue starts to spin around my tip every time she pulls me out. She takes me deeper and deeper into her throat then sucks me to the very tip. My muscles begin to tighten as my hand moves up to tangle into her hair.
“Fuck, Cora.”
“Is it bad?” she asks before quickly going back to work.
“Fuck, no.” My head falls back against the pillow. “You’re fucking perfect,” I breathe out. And when I do, she works harder, like she’s trying to earn my release. “Stop,” I whisper, wanting her on top of me now—not wanting to blow in her mouth and rob her of her first time on top. “Baby, stop before I come.” My release starts to rise and I have to pull myself back.
She sits up and looks down at me. Her hair is a mess from my hands running through it and her lips are swollen and glistening from sucking me. She looks sexy as fuck and I don’t know how long I can hold out as I pull her lips back up to mine. She settles over my body now, sliding me between her folds. I place one hand on her hip and take myself in hand with the other. Gently, I guide myself to her entrance.
“It’s all on you now, Cora,” I whisper against her lips.
Slowly, she begins to sink down onto me. Painfully slowly. All I want to do is thrust upward as hard as I can, but I hold myself back, wanting to give her the space she needs to set the pace. She takes me in inch by inch until she’s taken all of me. My hands fall to her hips as I lift her up and allow gravity to take her back down. Her back is straight, her head is tilted back, and her breasts are bouncing up and down with each rise and fall. Her breathing picks up and grows louder, and watching her has my own release begging to be set free. But I won’t allow it. Not until she’s gotten everything she needs from me.
She rolls her hips and grinds into me, and I can tell by the way her brows pull together and the way she sucks in a breath that she likes the new sensation she’s found with this position. I lift her up again, letting her hit the same mark. It only takes minutes before she’s shattering on top of me and my eyes are open to witness every life-altering moment of it. When she’s come down from her high, she slumps forward, her chest pressing to mine as I kiss her shoulder.
“How was it?” I ask.
“Perfect,” she whispers, kissing my neck, and that simple gesture has my blood boiling, ready to allow myself to explode. I pick her up, this time removing myself from her, and she seems confused—that is, until I position her on her knees and climb behind her. She doesn’t even jump when I enter her from behind. I’m only about halfway in when she jerks away from me.
“Relax,” I tell her, kissing her back as I pull out and slide back in. This time, I let my hand fall around her and find her clit. I rub circles around it as I push myself in and out of her body. I feel her tighten around me at the same time her moans fill the tent around us.
Fuck. Why is everything about this woman so perfect for me? Already, I can feel my own orgasm building. It sends shockwaves through my body, setting my nerve endings on fire. Everything starts to tingle, and just when her moans fall silent, I pump every last drop into her without thinking about anything other than how good she makes me feel.
When my hips stop moving into her, I lean against her to catch my breath. “Fuck, Cora,” I say, kissing her back.
“I know,” she replies, breathless as we both fall to our sides, curled up in each other. It doesn’t take long before we’re both completely asleep.
“So, where are we on that list of yours?” I ask as I’m cooking breakfast over the fire.
She pulls it out of her bag and sits at the picnic table. She crosses her legs and starts marking things off.
“Have an orgasm, check,” she says with a smirk as she slashes through it. “Go camping, check. Hike, check. Go fishing, check. Go kayaking, check.”
“So what’s the next thing we’re going to work on?”
She glances over the list. “I want to run a marathon.”
I look up at her. “Seriously?”
“Yep.” She nods.
“You realize how much training you’re going to have to do?”
“I know. I’m in pretty good shape. I should be able to run a 5K by the end of the summer, don’t you think?”
I shrug and go back to cooking.
“I think I’m going to look to see if there’s anything coming up. Having a deadline will help get my butt in gear.” She pulls out her phone and is clicking around while I finish up our eggs and sausage. When everything is done, we sit and eat, talking about all the changes she will have to make in order to get in shape for a marathon, but she seems determined and doesn’t give in.
“I’ll train you. You can start coming to the gym with me every morning before work.”
“Before work?” she asks, eyes wide.
“Yep, I get up at 4 a.m. every morning. I hit the gym for an hour, then shower and go to work. It’s not that bad once you get used to it.”
This makes her groan and hang her head.
After we eat, we decide to enjoy our last day at our camping spot. We go for a hike, take a swim in the lake, and rent a paddle boat. Around 2 p.m., we decide it’s time to load up and head back home to get ready for our busy workweek.
We’re quiet as we pack up our camp, and I’m on pins and needles waiting for the conversation—the one that always comes after two friends hook up. I have no idea where her head’s at after sleeping together. She seems like she’s lost in thought as she rolls up the sleeping bags. She’s worrying her bottom lip and I catch her looking at me several times. However, when I look at her, her eyes dash away and her cheeks turn pink from being caught. I want to know what she’s thinking. All this waiting is driving me mad. I just want to know where I stand with her. Does she still consider me to be a work friend? Or have I now been bumped up to friend? Now that we’ve slept together, am I still just a frie
nd, or something more? Did our coming together mean anything to her, or was it just a hookup?
I don’t want to bring it up. If she’s avoiding it for a reason, I don’t want to shove it in her face and make her inspect it. But I know I’ll feel like I’m dangling from a string until it’s clear where I stand with her.
We finally manage to get everything packed into the car and we start the long ride home. She gets into the passenger side of the car and immediately rolls down her window. She buckles up and reaches for the volume button on the dash, turning up the music so it’s too loud to talk. Again, I wonder if she’s not wanting to have this talk, or perhaps she just hasn’t wrapped her mind around it yet. I want to give her all the time she needs, so instead of turning down the music and bringing up the topic, I just sit back and focus on driving.
The drive is long, and while we talk here and there about work, the coming week, and whatever else we think of, the topic I want to address remains ignored. I pull up in front of her building and park. We both climb out, then I grab her stuff out of the trunk and follow her up to her apartment.
“Thanks for carrying everything for me,” she says, walking through her apartment and turning on some lights.
“It’s no problem,” I say, setting everything down next to the couch.
She looks nervous as she stands behind the couch with her arms crossed.
“So the gym in the morning?” I ask.
She frowns. “Can’t we work out in the evening? I’m much more of a night person.” She gives me her blinding-white smile and bats her lashes.
“All right,” I agree. “I have a buddy who owns a gym. I’ll talk to him and see if we can come in after hours.”
She smiles wide. “Thank you.”
I start toward the door, feeling awkward. Do I kiss her? Do I not kiss her? I don’t know. I stop and turn to face her. She’s followed me down the hallway.
“I’m wiped from this weekend. I can’t wait to take a long, hot shower and crawl into my soft bed. I didn’t realize how spoiled I was,” she laughs out.
The F It List (Love You Forever Book 6) Page 8