I nervously tied my sash around my robe. As my fingers fumbled, flashes of when Conner untied my sash in my room gave me shivers. “What are you doing here?” I timidly asked as my eyes met his.
“You don’t watch the news much do you?” He asked as he tilted his head. I pressed my lips together unsure of why he would ask that, especially since the threats his mother made of news reporters were in my nightmares every time I closed my eyes.
“I’m too fearful I’ll see naked pictures of me all over,” I tried to make a small joke, as I gave a fake laugh and looked around the room. The irony of me posing nude for artists hit me, so I laughed and added, “at least an artists’ depiction wouldn’t make them so tawdry.”
Conner nodded pressing his lips together as he held a wary expression. I glanced away again even though I just wanted to stare at his beautiful face. I longed to kiss him with everything I had, but he continued to seem distant from me. As he spoke, I understood why. “Gordon was exposed for the cheating asshole he was. It came out that my mom paid several women he had affairs with to go away and never discuss it.” My eyes snapped to his as I blinked, trying to process what he just told me. “Were you…were you one of those women?”
I sighed deeply and realized why he had traveled here — to find out if I was just another one of Gordon’s affairs. What did I have to lose at this point? I didn’t want to lie anymore. I shrugged as I admitted, “he was the boyfriend I wanted you to help me forget.”
Disappointment filled his face as his teeth tugged at the corner of his bottom lip. I knew it wasn’t the answer he wanted, but the last thing I wanted was for him to find out another way. I touched his arm, giving him a sorrowful smile, “I’m truly sorry, Conner.” His eyes still marred disappointment as he nodded, accepting my apology.
There was nothing more I could say that would explain the situation, so I turned and began to walk away. His hand grabbed my wrist as he spun me around to face him. My heart picked up as I felt the warmth of his hand wrapping around my waist. When his other hand touched my face and he pulled me closer, I didn’t bother fighting my urge as I stared deep into his eyes.
“I haven’t stopped thinking about you. Even after I found out. I’ve painted portraits of you, almost daily. I left school and told my mother I don’t ever want to be in politics.”
“Is that why you’re here?” I asked, wondering if it was just to pursue his artistic talents or hoping that he really came for another reason.
“No. I’m here for you. I’m here because we only had two days together…I want a lifetime with you.”
My lips started trembling as I felt a rush of overwhelming love for him. His eyes darted to my mouth and smiled, probably noticing my mouth quivering. He bent down and pressed his lips to mine.
The immense need we felt during our first kiss at the bar surged through me. I clutched his shirt desiring to have him just as close as I needed him that night. Our tongues entwined with as much passion as it did that first night in the bar together. When I needed him to help me forget what I thought was love and instead he helped us both create the love we now felt for each other.
Author Bio
Janice Baker is the author of The Alluring Promises Series. Her novels involve steamy romance, amusing characters and happy endings (although those are not guaranteed!). When her fingers aren’t pounding away on the keyboard, you can find her spending time with her family down at the beach and thinking up more drama for her books.
Links:
Website: http://authorjanicebaker.com/
Twitter: @AuthorJBaker
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJaniceBaker
Goodreads: http://www.goodreads.com/JaniceBaker
Google+ Page: [email protected]
Purchase Links:
Alluring Promises Series:
Promises, Promises (Book 1) - Amazon: http://amzn.to/1a8azb5
Romantic Promises (Book 2) - Amazon: http://amzn.to/1cFLj9V
In Too Deep
by
Morgan Jane Mitchell
Chapter One
“If I’m ever raped, I wanna be on top,” Crystal ended her introduction as I hurried through the door. Taking my seat in the circle quickly, I tried not to roll my eyes or sigh. What an idiot! Didn’t she know women really were forced to have sex against their will -raped?
It was a horrible thing to say, but the group’s counselor took it in stride. “Crystal, this is a new line. Would you care to explain?”
“I’ve finally figured it out. I want to be force fucked. I’ve set it up. Next week, five guys, it is going to happen,” she beamed.
Ms. Collins face stayed neutral. “So, you are saying you have arranged an ambush. You are having some men pretend to coerce you?” I was so thankful she didn’t say rape. Ms. Collins was always careful. She had to be, she was leading a support group for sex addicts.
Crystal nodded her head cheerfully, clearly proud of herself.
What was I doing here? Besides sitting between Crystal’s gang rape fantasies and old man Charlie’s foot fetish? Looking down to hide the contempt on my face, I was just beginning to rethink my resolutions before Ms. Collins asked me to introduce myself again. We had to at every meeting because half of the members rarely attended. A long-term member would roll in after a particularly bad night.
Plastering on a forced smile, I began, “Hi, I’m Loraine.” Last names were off limits. “As I said last time, I am not a sex addict, but there isn’t a support group for my problem. So here I am.”
“You could join the frigid club if you don’t like us,” Crystal sneered.
Ms. Collin’s cleared her throat. “Loraine, is not frigid. She seeks out sexual pleasure as much as you.”
“Yeah, whatever.” Crystal continued to study her nails.
“Loraine, please go on. We have some lifetime members joining us today who have not heard about your situation.”
Having rushed into the meeting, I finally scanned the room to get the shock of my life. I tried not to drool but across from me was the finest man I’d ever laid eyes on. Inhale, Loraine. Mortified, I couldn’t lie. Most of the group heard my story on my first visit. Now I’d have to spew my secret to the most desired, eligible bachelor in town. Always straight faced and serious, he now squinted, scrutinizing me before a flash of recognition shone on his face. Shit! His sultry eyes locked onto mine, I couldn’t read his reaction but could tell he was really paying attention now.
What’s worse, Richard Mahoney was my boss, the owner of the high scale restaurant I’d worked at for the last month. Only thirty, only a little older than I was, there’s no way he should ooze such sophistication. He was a fine wine where I was an American cheese. Rick was the kind of man classic novels were written about, the big sexy fish no one could catch. Sure, everyone called him Rick the dick at work, but the man made women’s panties hit the floor, and he loved every second of it. Being made of money, his main redeeming quality, at least for me was he’d worked hard to make Table 21 the hottest place in town and hadn’t stopped working when he’d succeeded. Even though he could be off playing golf on a tropical island somewhere, Rick rolled his sleeves up and was in the middle of the action.
While I contemplated if running out of the door would be just as embarrassing as speaking, Ms. Collins motioned for me to go on. I’d have to; I promised my doctor and my mother I’d give this a try. Assuring myself Rick’s presence alone meant he’d had to have heard worse stories, my curiosity kicked in as I realized he was sitting in this group of weirdoes with me. Rick had his own demons, secrets no one in town had even whispered about. He was a sex addict.
Finding my strength, I started all over again. “Hi, my name is Loraine, and I am 25.” I shook my head. Why did I say my age? “I am not addicted to sex but to getting off. I seek out men on a nightly basis who are willing to do anything to please me. And they get nothing in return.”
“Meaning?” Ms. Collins probed. “Loraine,
we all explain our addictions specifically in here.”
“I am addicted to being orally pleasured but not having actual intercourse,” I said through my teeth.
I couldn’t miss Rick’s eyes popping out of his head. “Have you had, um, intercourse before?” he asked in an odd voice.
Looking away fast, I said nothing. I didn’t want to have to go through this every time I came here. Of course, a group of actual sex addicts would think I was the strange one. Feeling exposed, I crossed my arms over my chest.
Ms. Collins patted my knee. “You don’t have to answer his question, but we all heard it last week. Rick has been with us a long time. He is a very supportive member and shares frequently.”
A girl with red hair snorted, causing Ms. Collins to give her a look of death. I spotted her nametag, Diane.
“No, I haven’t had intercourse. I’ve never been penetrated by a man, by anything,” I answered clearly and concisely. Maybe the questions would stop, but I doubted it.
“So you’re still a virgin?” Rick uttered slowly, noticeably shocked.
Eyeing Ms. Collins, instead of anyone else, I blew out a breath of frustration. I so didn’t feel like a virgin. “Actually, my hymen is broken.” I knew that didn’t really mean anything after my doctor explained it, but it shut most people up. “I’ve been given the option to go through some physical therapy to try to help,” I managed to get out next. I‘d also flat out refused.
Ms. Collins provided a reassuring smile. “If you would like to share first, go ahead.”
Nodding to her, I remembered I needed this, to be understood. My therapist said it was necessary to share with people other than my mother and him. He said what I had wasn’t just a problem but an addiction. That I needed rehab but this would have to do. Here I promised not to behave badly, but came to confess my sins weekly when I did anyway. Maybe these confessions would help me make sense of myself.
“Last night, I went out to a club with a girlfriend,” I said keeping things as vague thus anonymous as possible.
Crystal perked up. “Lesbian?”
“No, a female friend. I met this guy, a college student. I have been out of college a few years now. Anyway, he was an easy target.”
“Meaning?” Diane, the red head interrupted to huffs from other members. “Trust me this is the good part,” she told Rick, touching his leg.
“Meaning, he was harmless. He was hot enough, they all are, but he was naïve. I could tell he would be thrilled someone like me chose him over his more popular friends. He'd be thrown off guard that I wanted to go somewhere more private instead of getting to know each other. We went back to his dorm, not to his room, but to the showers. He got down on his knees, pulled my jeans down and ate me out. I was in control, standing, leaning against the wall with my hands in his hair like I was a guy getting my dick sucked.” Just remembering it caused my nipples to harden as I tried not to squirm in my plastic seat.
“What happened next?” Ms. Collins directed.
“I got off and made my excuses to leave soon after.” I shrugged then laughed, “He was pretty, pissed. I don’t think he’ll call.” I didn’t give him my number.
“So you are a cock tease,” Rick blurted out.
“Now Rick, Loraine has tried to go all the way but found she can’t. It may be a phobia,” Ms. Collins studied me with her pencil to her chin. “You have no experiences with abuse, right?”
“None,” I answered honestly. It was usually the first and last question ever asked. After I denied abuse of any kind, no one took my problem seriously.
“Yeah, right. Just a cock tease,” Rick mumbled to old man Charlie.
Richard Maloney, striking black hair and light blue eyes with a statuesque body or not, was really starting to piss me off. “I am not a tease!” I almost shrieked. “How many times have you gotten your dick sucked and didn’t return the favor, not even had sex afterwards?” I challenged. Guys did that sort of thing all the time, at least in the movies. I’d never been able to date one very long.
Rick shrugged, I was right.
Crystal spoke up, “Rick won’t eat pussy. He’s not scared of it; he’s just too good for it. I for one have never slept a man who wouldn’t go down.”
Old man Charlie babbled, “I’d ram my rod up that tight pussy, fix Loraine right quick.”
“Mmm hmm,” Rick agreed.
“Gentleman! That is enough.” Ms. Collins scolded all of us and defended me gloriously to my embarrassment. Then we discussed as a group how my behavior was dangerous, no matter how careful I thought I was. Plotting daily to find sexual enjoyment had taken over my life. The others related their problems to my own. We all vowed to change, but that was easier said than done. We weren’t stupid; we were addicted.
After class, I spoke to Ms. Collins alone to tell her Rick was my boss. Reminding me he signed the same agreement I did, she added, “We all have secrets here. There has never been an issue with anyone in the group breaking our pact.” That explained why I hadn’t heard of Rick coming here. I wanted to be comforted by her assurances, but I didn’t need any more trouble in my life. Never having told my secret before in this group, I left the community center more troubled than ever.
~*~*~*~
Work was hell. I hadn’t waited tables since my early days of college. Having lost my job at Harrowmore Publishing House for fooling around with the boss, I no longer had a choice. Dex Anders was furious when I didn’t end up putting out and had spread the rumor himself. In all fairness, the asshole lost his job too. Without my insurance plan, I could no longer afford to tell Dr. Ludden all my secrets in private. I’d agreed to go to the support group the same week since my addiction was threatening my livelihood. Well, since my mother said she’d help me out if I made a commitment to stop whoring around, as she called it. I’d submitted my resume to all Harrowmore’s competitors with no luck before applying to Table 21. Between student loans and purchasing a townhouse, losing the best job I had since graduation was a major blow to my lifestyle. By no means had I been well off, but I’d been comfortably working toward making a decent living while able to have some fun along the way. Now I couldn’t even afford to meet my only friend, Rene out for our weekly sushi night.
Closing was the worst. I was beat from running around in heels all night and now had to clean and stock my section, then roll silverware. They didn’t pay me enough for all that. I made tips, and even if it was more money than I could make at the other restaurants in town, I wouldn’t have to clean up somewhere else. Rick’s motto was teamwork. He expected us to work hard like him. Blowing out a heavy breath, I went to the back to grab some supplies.
Deangelo, one of the cooks, slammed down his knife. “Damn Jimmie, he’s the reason all of our produce is ruined. I need more lemons, someone please. These are all rotten ice cubes.”
“I’ve got it,” I announced when no one else budged from their own duties. Teamwork, my rosy red behind. When I entered the walk-in that now felt like a freezer, the door was sucked shut hard behind me. I froze. Speaking of behinds, bent over counting inventory, Rick was a sight to behold. His perfect backside stared back at me. “You really should bend at the knees,” I said to get his attention. After all, he was in my way.
His signature devilish smirk appeared when he turned around. “Loraine? Is it? We need to talk about the other day.”
Shit, I didn’t want to have this conversation. I’d been purposely avoiding him for the last few days. It was embarrassing. Couldn’t he just pretend it didn’t happen, like me? “Busy now, I am closing my section. I don’t even remember why I came in here,” I stammered lying. I turned to leave, I’d tell Deangelo to run his own damn errands.
“Freeze.” His stern voice startled me, and I removed my hand from the door handle.
I held my breath waiting, not turning around to show him my horrified face. Rick didn’t have to remind me not to tell his secret. Who did he think I was? I signed the agreement, and so did he. Knowing he was about
to bring up the subject made my cheeks get hot and my pulse quicken. Placing my hands on my middle, I searched and found my usual confident self. Cocking my hip to one side, I managed a rough, “What?”
Rick was silent as his large cold hands covered my own. Shocking the hell out of me, he pulled my hips back, rubbing his trapped erection against my ass. His thin dress pants didn’t do much to disguise how rigid his cock was becoming. It felt huge. Facing the freezing door, I was frozen all right. Anyone could walk in at any moment. They’d smack me on the forehead then see my boss grinding up against my skirt -but I couldn’t move. I opened my mouth to protest but the fact I hadn’t had my daily fix today made me mute. Waiting to see what he would do next, I felt an impatient moisture seeping onto my panties.
I sucked in a breath when Rick’s manicured but frozen hands raced under my blouse to yank down the cups of my bra. His dick twitched against my ass as he rolled my nipples in his freezing fingertips. I closed my eyes; it felt too good. Raising up my shirt up completely, exposing my tight peeks to the frigid air, he shoved me against the door. My naked breasts smashed against the icy metal first. I broke away from the door with a yelp, “Fuck, that’s cold.”
Rick’s taut body forced me back in place, my cheek hitting the door as hot breath hit my ear. “Stay.”
Every nerve in my body begged me to listen to him. The sensation of his frame against mine disappeared and his hands crept under the back of my skirt to jerk my tiny thong down to my knees. Using his knee to spread my legs as far as the thong would let him, he ordered, “Put your hands on the door.” I carefully placed them flat on the freezing slick surface as I quivered in anticipation.
Rick lifted the back of my skirt and tucked it into its belt revealing my bare ass to the chilly air. I heard a sound like he was jacking off. Lubing himself up? No, this couldn’t be happening. Did he plan to fix me? Surely not. I started to move but the sound stopped. Rick’s hand snaked around my pelvic bone to search for my aching clit. He pinched it between his cool fingers, warming me. This wasn’t so bad, letting a man take control, I thought as Rick kneaded my clit, working me up, making me hotter for him than I ever felt possible.
Forbidden Fruit: Volume 1 Page 51