by Zina Abbott
Louisa closed her eyes shimmering with tears that threatened to spill, “I know, Beth. And I understand what you’re saying about it not being fair to Gus to keep us both on when business is so slow for him. But, I like cooking for Gus. He’s so good with Sophie Ann, and so is Mary Ford. I feel like I’ve made friends here. I finally feel a little bit accepted by the people in this town. I’m just not ready to leave all that yet.”
“It ain’t the folks in Lundy so much as it’s Gus, ain’t it?”
Louisa hunched her shoulders and dropped her head, burying her face in her hands.
“You’re in love with Gus, ain’t you?”
A few seconds passed, and then Louisa nodded. She sat up and faced Beth, tears streaming down her cheeks. “That doesn’t matter though. Gus doesn’t love me. He doesn’t want to marry anyone, let alone someone like me. No man would.”
“That ain’t so, Louisa. Gus know how you feel?”
“No. And…please don’t tell him. I don’t want to embarrass him. I’d feel so humiliated if he knew.”
As hard as it had been to break the news to Mary Ford and Louisa, Beth had not been prepared for the explosion that took place when she told Gus she, Louisa and Sophie Ann would be leaving.
“Nein! Nein, herrisch Witwe! You not the boss. Me! Gus!” Gus repeatedly jabbed his chest with his forefinger. “Gus the boss. You vant vit Val Caldwell to go, you go. But Luise and Sophie Ann stay. For Gus she vork—make biscuits and Brot.” Bread.
It was not lost on either woman Gus had called Louisa by the German version of her given name. Out of the corner of her eye, Beth watched Josh quietly back into a corner to avoid attention and stay clear of Gus’s wrath. Beth calmly continued her argument.
“Louisa ain’t stayin’, Gus. It ain’t proper. Her bein’ a single woman and all, she can’t live alone. Even if she stayed, Louisa don’t make enough to pay for her own room.”
“Then in the loft I sleep and Louisa and Sophie Ann sleep here.” Gus pointed to the space behind the blanket. “They stay, Frau Dodd.”
Beth pursed her lips in frustration. “Ain’t fittin’. It don’t matter if you’re the one sleepin’ upstairs, Gus. Folks in town will still figure on her bein’ the upstairs girl. All we done worked for to make her respectable would plumb fly out the window. You got no right askin’ that of her. She’s comin’ with me ’til we leave for Ohio.”
“Nein.” Gus turned to address Louisa. “You stay, ya? Ve work someting out. You cook for Gus, ya?”
Louisa burst into more tears and shook her head. “Oh, Gus. I don’t want to go. I want to stay and cook for you. But, Beth is right. I have to do what is best for Sophie Ann…and that means I must go with Beth.”
With that, Louisa ran out the back door and slammed it behind her. The loud noise startled Sophie Ann awake from the nap she had been taking in the corner. Beth picked up the baby and patted her on the back while she paced back and forth to calm the child.
“Gus, I know she don’t want to go, but she ain’t stayin’ unless she’s married. I know you said you ain’t never plannin’ to marry none, but you never done said why. How come you’re so plumb set against it, Gus?”
With a hint of regret in his eyes and his voice much quieter than it had been, Gus replied. “Not your business, herrisch Witwe.”
“I know it ain’t. But the way I figure, unless someone like you was to up and marry her, she needs to come with me. Is it you ain’t wantin’ someone like Louisa due to her past?”
Gus brushed aside her question with a jerk of his hand. “Ach. I no stones at Louisa can throw.”
“You got you a long lost love in Bavaria you been yearnin’ for?”
“Nein.” Gus shook his head in disgust. Then, sucking in a deep breath, he said. “I not a good husband make. No Kinder.” Children.
“Louisa don’t figure on no more babies. She figures ain’t no man willin’ to marry her. Even if one was to up and offer, she ain’t marryin’ no man unless he’d be a good pa to Sophie Ann. You ever think you’d like to be Sophie Ann’s pa?”
With longing in his eyes, Gus looked over at the tear-stained face of the baby who now had her head resting on Beth’s shoulder. He spoke the words so softly Beth almost didn’t hear them.
“Ich liebe Sophie Ann.”
“You ever tell Louisa your feelin’s about Sophie Ann?”
“Nein.”
“Ain’t it about time? Best you talk to Louisa, tell her you love Sophie Ann. If you got any feelin’s at all for Louisa, you best say so, and up and marry her. Otherwise, she and Sophie Ann is headin’ out with me to Robinson Creek.”
“Luise liebt mich nicht. She not want me for husband.”
Beth knew Gus was wrong. Louisa did love Gus. But, Louisa had already asked Beth not to tell him of her feelings.
“How’d you figure that, Gus? You done talked to her about it?”
“Nein.”
“If you ain’t talked, then you don’t know if she’s got feelin’ for you or not. Gus, you best go out there and talk to Louisa.”
Gus waved her words away, his voice full of anger, “Quiet, Frau Dodd. Not your business.”
“Reckon I’m makin’ it my business. Stop bein’ so stubborn, Gus. Go on out there and talk to her.”
“Stubborn? Ach! You, herrisch Witwe, you the stubborn one.”
“And I ain’t goin’ to let up none ’til you go on out there and talk to her.”
Gus threw his hands in the air. “Fine! Ve talk!” He turned and stomped toward the back door.
“Gus!” Beth called out as his hand closed around the doorknob. “Be spittin’ mad at me all you want. But don’t you go hollerin’ at Louisa or I’ll get my pa’s huntin’ knife and skin your hide. With Louisa, you best talk short sweetenin’ as apple pie, ya?”
Gus took a deep breath and exhaled. “Ya.”
In the silence that followed Gus slamming the door behind him, Josh looked over at Beth and grinned. “You sure made Gus mad, Mrs. Dodd. You think he’ll marry Miss Parmley?”
“Reckon we’ll know soon enough. No matter what happens, you’ll stay and help Gus, won’t you, Josh?”
“Yes, but I’ll sure miss you, Mrs. Dodd.”
“I’ll miss you, too, Josh. You’ve been a right fine helper with them chickens of mine.”
“You sure look good with a baby on your shoulder, Beth. Bet my brother thinks so, too, although he probably would prefer it be one of his.”
Beth spun around to see both Val and Luther standing in the doorway leading from the saloon into the kitchen.
“Why would you miss Mrs. Dodd, Josh?” Val asked as he stepped into the room and stood next to Beth. “Where are you going, Beth?”
“Mrs. Dodd is leaving with you to go to her new house and Gus is talking to Louisa.”
“Leaving with us? What about Miss Parmley and the baby? Is she coming, too?”
“Possible.” Beth glanced over to the back door. “Dependin’.”
“What’s going on, Beth?”
Between Beth and Josh, they told the whole story. When they finished, Luther roared with laughter.
“Bethie Rose,” Val rolled his eyes and shook his head. “My little matchmaker with a sledgehammer.”
“We need to stick around and see the outcome of this, Brother.” Luther continued to chuckle. “This will be too good to miss.”
CHAPTER 14
Gus found Louisa hiding among some trees behind the necessary. With her back to him, he could tell by the way her hands gripped her elbows her arms were clutched tightly around her middle. He stopped several feet away and took a deep breath to shake away his nervousness before he spoke.
“Luise, ve talk, ya?”
Louisa slowly turned to face him, her face still streaked with tears. “What is there to talk about, Gus? I have to do what is best for my baby, and I can’t if I’m seen as nothing more than a kept woman.”
“Sophie Ann a papa needs.” Gus hesitantly stepped closer to her.
“Yes, but I won’t let just any man raise her. And I doubt any man will ever willingly marry me so he can be her papa. I have to make a good life for her by myself.”
“Nein, Luise, Ich liebe Sophie Ann. I vant Sophie Ann’s papa to be.”
He loves Sophie Ann. He wants to be her father.
Louisa blinked and her face blossomed with an expression of wonder. “Honest, Gus?”
“Ya. But if ve marry, no more Kinder. Ich kann nicht eine Frau Kinder.”
“No more children for your wife?” Louisa’s forehead wrinkled with confusion. “Are you saying you don’t want any more children or you can’t have any children?”
“Can’t. Yellow jack.”
“Yellow jack…you’ve had yellow fever?”
After Gus nodded his head, Louisa thought back on what she had heard about the disease. There had been a bad outbreak of it over a decade earlier and many people, especially in the Southern states, had died of it. As a child, she had heard it whispered that if a man survived it, it left him without the ability to sire children.
“I’m sorry to hear that, Gus. But, Sophie Ann is enough for me.”
“All vomen vant more kinder.”
“I don’t need more children as long as I can have you and Sophie Ann. You are such a good man. I can’t think of anyone other than you I want to help me raise her.”
Gus stepped forward and reached for Louisa’s hand. “Then you stay and ve marry, ya? You cook for Gus. Ve leaf Lundy soon and start a new restaurant someplace new. Ya?”
Gus loves Sophie Ann and he wants to marry me. But he didn’t say how he feels about me.
****
Louisa did her best to compose herself before she followed Gus back into the kitchen. She expected Beth and Josh to be waiting to find out what she and Gus decided, but she blinked in surprise at the sight of Val and Luther Caldwell also standing in the room. She guessed from the looks of expectation on their faces as they all stood in a semi-circle that the newcomers had been there long enough for Beth to tell them her plans.
“Gus, you sure were mad at Mrs. Dodd for telling you to talk to Miss Parmley, weren’t you?” Josh asked.
“Ya.”
“But you talked to her, huh?”
Louisa glanced at Gus long enough to see him grudgingly nod his head. She clasped her hands in front of her and looked at the floor. During the silent pause that followed, she decided it was best if she let Gus tell them.
“You aim to tell us what you done decided?”
Count on Beth to get to the point.
When Gus reached for her elbow and pulled her next to him before he wrapped his hand around the back of her waist. Louisa looked up at Beth and smiled.
“Ve marry.” Gus declared.
The room erupted in cheers.
“I guess the next question is, when?” Val asked.
Gus shrugged. “Tonight.”
“No.” Beth and Louisa cried out in unison.
At the questioning looks, Beth explained. “Tomorrow. We done packed most everything. Louisa needs a nice dress, and this here”—Beth gestured toward Gus’s nook—“ain’t fittin’ for Sophie Ann. I figure with me leavin’, Mrs. Ford done got a room to let if Gus don’t drag his feet none talkin’ to her about it. Reckon Gus can line up Judge McLean to do the honors tomorrow mornin’. And I aim to bake some cake to celebrate.”
“All right, Beth,” Val said with a grin. “But try to get this all done as early as possible. We need to leave as soon as we can tomorrow so we can get you at least part way to your new home by nightfall.”
****
Once they were outside of Judge McLean’s office after the wedding, Louisa turned to Albert and Daisy, a Blue Feather working girl, to tell them how grateful she felt that they had come. She knew Mrs. Ford probably disapproved that the two had attended. Still, she wasn’t willing to turn her back on her friends from her past even though she had left her former life behind. Word had spread around town there would be a free slice of cake compliments of Beth for those who stopped by to wish the newlyweds well, but she didn’t know if Albert and Daisy would come. If they did, she would welcome them. But with the respectable of Lundy standing around her, she knew better than to issue a personal invitation.
Louisa turned to smile at Daisy. “Sophie Ann is growing so strong and healthy. Thank you for being a friend and staying with me when she was born.”
“I’m so happy for you, Lulu…I mean…Louisa. Mrs. Augustus Herschel.” Daisy giggled and glanced over to Mary Ford who still held Sophie. She grabbed Louisa’s hand and gave it a quick squeeze. “I’m so glad for your baby that it worked out she has you and a new papa. You take care, now.”
“I will.”
Louisa Herschel. Mrs. Augustus Herschel. Frau Herschel. Louisa loved the sound of her new name.
Louisa felt Gus step to her side and crook his elbow. Even as she smiled while she placed her hand on his arm, she feared to turn and look at him, worried she might see disapproval on his face because she stopped to speak to her friends from the Blue Feather.
Nodding to Gus, Albert reached into his inside coat pocket and pulled out a leather draw spring pouch and handed it to Louisa. “Miss Flora asked me to give this to you, Mrs. Herschel. Once she heard you were getting married, she finished selling your things you said you had no use for. There’s a little more thrown in there from those of us who wish you well.”
Daisy volunteered, “The new girl bought most of your gowns. I bought the green one. Miss Flora said since my name is Daisy I should always wear yellow, but I bought it anyway. I hope you don’t mind.”
Louisa smiled and shook her head. She swallowed back tears as she accepted the pouch full of gold and coins. At one time, she had looked forward to receiving this money to help her go back east and start over. Now, she hoped it would not come between her and her new husband.
Hesitantly, she turned and handed it to Gus, praying he cared for her enough to not make a public scene. “This is from some jewelry and things I asked to be sold. Will you please hold this for me?” Louisa watched with gratitude as Gus, without a word, slid the pouch in his pants pocket.
Beth had already lectured her about keeping her money and property she owned from before she married separate. Louisa had listened without saying much, thinking perhaps she if had enough, once she and Gus moved, she would use her money to buy a small house for them to live in. But, beyond that, she felt so grateful to Gus for agreeing to marry her and be Sophie Ann’s papa, she knew she would willingly turn whatever else she owned over to him to use as he saw fit.
“We need to get back, Mrs. Herschel.” Albert lightly touched Daisy’s elbow as he spoke for both of them. “If we don’t see you around, just know we all wish you happiness. Even Miss Flora does, now that she’s gotten used to the idea you’re not coming back.”
For only a few seconds, Louisa watched them walk away before she turned toward the rest of the wedding party. Her break with the Blue Feather was now complete.
“I say we head back to The Arcade Saloon.” Luther broke the silence that had settled on the group. “I’m ready get my hands on some of that cake Mrs. Dodd baked for everyone. Then, I’ll just sit back and relax until it’s time to give the newlyweds a good old-fashioned shivaree.”
“There ain’t goin’ to be no shivaree, Luther Caldwell.” Beth, her arms akimbo, glared at her future brother-in-law. “They got them a baby, and Sophie Ann don’t need no shivaree keepin’ her awake all night.”
“The way I hear it,” retorted Luther, “with a baby, they won’t need a shivaree to keep them awake all night.”
“Luther, you better be grateful we have enough time to grab a piece of cake and wish Gus and Louisa well on their new life together before we head out,” Val spoke up. “We were supposed to leave at first light, remember? With the promise of more snow in the next day or so, we need to get down the mountain while we still can.”
Luther laughed in response. “Whatever
you say, Brother. Besides, the wedding I’m waiting to celebrate is yours. There will be a shivaree for that one, you can bet money on it. And the new Mrs. Caldwell won’t have one word of say about it, either.”
With a frown, Beth glanced at Val’s laughing face before she turned away and quickly marched toward The Arcade, leaving it up to her future husband to catch up with her.
Ain’t goin’ to be no shivaree at my weddin’, not if I have my druthers.
Beth would cross that bridge when she came to it. For now, she had wedding cake to serve before she and Val started the journey to her new home along Robinson Creek.
****
That night, alone back in the room that she had once shared with Beth, but which was now her new home with her husband, Louisa changed into her white cotton nightgown. She stared into the mirror over the dressing table as she brushed her hair. She still only owned plain nightwear, but taking everything into consideration, she hoped Gus wouldn’t mind.
Louisa studied the high neck with the ruffled edge held together by the drawstring. After she had Sophie Ann, she had modified this gown that originally slipped over her head so that it opened down the front and fastened with plain white buttons. Her breasts felt full and grew uncomfortable with the need to feed her baby. She shook her head as she looked down at her round stomach that had never shrunk to its pre-pregnancy flatness. Even though she was covered from chin to toes, knowing Gus was going to see her this way, she felt exposed.
No, Gus is my husband. He’s going to see me in a lot less than this nightgown.
Louisa tried to reconcile herself to the realization that, for years, men she did not know and who meant nothing to her had seen far more of her. Yet, now she felt shy at the prospect of her husband seeing her.
Maybe because I care so much about what he thinks of me.
Louisa leaned over the bed to change Sophie Ann. After being happy all afternoon, she fussed with fatigue. Louisa knew her little one had to be hungry. She no sooner picked the baby up than a knock sounded. Carrying Sophie Ann, she stepped over to the door to the room.