by Seton, Cora
“This isn’t interfering,” Cash protested, his panic returning full force. “It’s not safe for her to go, sir. You know that. And I know you still have connections. You can get the magazine to pull the plug on the story, and…”
And then Jen would never talk to either one of them again, Cash realized in dismay. He could forget about putting a ring on her finger—she’d rip his balls off, throw them in the Pacific, and then toss the rest of him in right along with them.
Gary was quick to voice what Cash was thinking. “My daughter is a forgiving person, Cash, but she’ll never forgive either one of us if we take this away from her.”
He bit the inside of his cheek so hard he tasted blood. “Aren’t you worried?”
“Of course I am. I always worry about Jenny. I also worry about you and my son every time you’re OCONUS. But I would never dream of intruding on one of your ops, or pulling strings to make sure your team is deployed to a lower-risk region.” Gary sighed. “Jenny chose this as her career, and it’s important to her. I won’t interfere.”
As Jen’s father restated his position, Cash had no choice but to admit defeat. Because if the admiral wasn’t going to step in to change Jen’s mind, then there really was no hope left.
Jen would take the assignment and fly off to a hot zone, and there was nothing Cash could do to stop her.
Chapter Four
‡
Jen was lying in bed when she heard the front door open, and even though she’d known where Cash was, a rush of relief still flooded her chest at knowing he was safe and sound. He’d texted hours ago to say he was going over to Jackson and Mia’s for the evening, but it was nearly eleven o’clock now, and she’d been getting worried.
But she supposed it made sense that he’d stayed away this long. He’d probably been hoping to delay the fight they’d be having tonight.
And there was absolutely going to be a fight. She was still pissed off at the way he’d behaved earlier, and she’d gotten even angrier when her father had called earlier to tell her that Cash had stopped by. Her dad hadn’t given her any details, but Jen didn’t need to be a genius to figure out why Cash had gone there.
He’d wanted the admiral to talk Jen out of the assignment. And involving her father was not only insulting, but humiliating.
Cash didn’t turn on the light when he entered the bedroom, but the bedside lamp was on and Jen could easily make out his expression. Sorrow. Embarrassment. Anger—yep, the anger was still there, and seeing it triggered her own.
“I’m surprised you didn’t just crash at Jackson’s,” she said tersely. “You were there long enough.”
Cash looked over at her, but he ignored the accusation. He stripped off his shirt and headed for the bathroom. “I’m taking a shower.”
Her mouth fell open as he disappeared through the doorway. He was shutting her out. Literally—he’d actually closed the bathroom door.
She sat up in amazement, listened to the sound of the faucet creaking on. She was tempted to storm in there, yank the shower curtain open, and tell him off. Or maybe she’d just flush the toilet, which would turn the water from hot to scalding, as they’d discovered when they’d first moved in. Yeah, Cash definitely deserved lobster skin for the way he was behaving right now.
But his shower was lightning fast, and he strode out a few minutes later with a towel wrapped around his waist.
“You’re acting like a child,” she informed him.
His blue eyes flashed. “No, I’m acting like a concerned boyfriend.”
“Overbearing boyfriend, more like it.”
“I’m sorry that I’m worried about your safety, Jen,” he said flatly. “I can’t exactly help it.”
He quickly dried off and slipped into a pair of boxer briefs, then walked to his side of the bed and slid under the covers. Keeping a foot of distance between them. It was so strange for their bodies not to be touching. They always snuggled in bed, even when one of them was reading or watching TV.
But Jen couldn’t bring herself to bridge the distance between them. It might as well have been a gaping chasm, and neither one of them was trying to cross it.
“So you’ve made up your mind then?” Cash said in a tired voice. “You’re going?”
“Yes.” She stared up at the ceiling. “My flight leaves at seven a.m.”
He didn’t answer.
“Oh, and don’t think I don’t know about that stunt you pulled earlier. My dad called and told me you went over there.” When Cash didn’t deny it, her irritation flared. “That was a dick move, cowboy. What, did you think he’d talk me out of it? Or let me guess, you thought he’d pull some strings and kill the story.”
“Wouldn’t be the worst thing,” Cash muttered.
Pinpricks of anger traveled up her spine. “You’re not being fair, you know. My work is important to me.”
“Yeah? Well, your life is important to me.”
“Oh my God, Cash, it’s not like I’m going on a suicide mission. I’m visiting a couple of towns—with a military escort, I might add—taking some pictures, and then I’m coming home. End of story.”
“Okay, fine. End of story.” His voice grew bitter. “And my opinion means nothing, right?”
Jen sighed. “Of course it means something. But in case you forgot, you didn’t offer me your opinion earlier. You gave me an order. But I’m still going, which means you can either support me, or you can continue to sulk about it.”
“I can’t support something I disagree with,” he muttered.
“Then don’t. I guess you’re choosing door number two—sulking.” Tears stung her eyes, and Jen quickly rolled over so he wouldn’t see them.
She and Cash never fought. They never went to bed angry. But she had no idea how to make things better, short of giving in and agreeing to turn down the job. She couldn’t, though. She wanted to go. She understood that Cash was worried, but she’d dealt with her fair share of worrying. She was in love with a SEAL, for God’s sake. Cash was constantly risking his life for something important and she accepted that, but now that the roles were reversed, he couldn’t do the same.
Blinking away her tears, she reached over and turned off the bedside lamp.
“Good night,” she mumbled.
“Night,” he mumbled back.
Darkness enveloped the bedroom, and Jen lay there, waiting, hoping Cash would say something. When he didn’t, she closed her eyes and let her pillow soak up her tears.
She was roused at four in the morning by rough-skinned fingers stroking her cheek.
Jen groggily opened her eyes, feeling Cash’s warm body spooning her from behind. She twisted her head and made out his anguished blue eyes in the faint light coming in through the curtains.
“I have to go,” he said softly.
She blinked a few times to wake herself up, trying to make sense of his words. He’d been running training missions with the team all week, up long before dawn and gone long before she awoke, but this was the first time he’d gotten her up before he left.
“I can’t go when we’re like this,” he added, and his voice cracked so hard that her heart wobbled in response.
She rolled over and touched his face, running her fingers over the scratchy stubble on his strong jaw. “Me neither,” she whispered.
“I don’t want you to go.”
“I know. But I’m still going.”
“I know.” He rubbed his cheek against hers, his whiskers scraping her chin. “Be careful, okay?”
“I always am.”
“Be extra careful this time,” he said firmly. “And promise that you’ll call me the second you land. Leave a message if I don’t pick up.”
“Okay.”
“Promise.”
“I promise.” She slid closer, all her anger and resentment melting away as their lips met.
The kiss was soft and sweet, but it wasn’t long before it turned hot and desperate. His tongue hungrily found hers, and she kissed him back with th
e same urgency, her breasts crushed against his hard chest as they lay there kissing. God, she loved him. She loved him so much and she hated fighting with him.
But surrendering to him now, welcoming the intimacy…it didn’t mean she’d forgotten everything else.
“We’ll talk when I get back,” she whispered when they broke apart.
He nodded, looking pained. “Yes, we will.”
She kissed him again, losing herself in his warmth, his strength. Powerful arms wrapped around her and held her tight to his body, his lips brushing her temple as he murmured, “Love you, sweetheart.”
“Love you, too.”
He slid out of bed, and Jen closed her eyes, burrowing under the blanket and sleepily listening to the sounds of him getting ready. He came back, and she felt his lips brush her forehead. “Don’t forget to call when you land,” he said firmly.
“I won’t,” she promised.
A warm hand swept over her cheek, and then he was gone.
When she woke up again, it was to the loud and persistent buzz of the alarm. Groaning, Jen slapped the clock until she managed to hit the snooze button, but she didn’t lounge in bed. Her flight was at seven, which gave her an hour to wash up, get dressed and drive to the private airfield where her charter awaited.
She was traveling light, and the small bag she’d packed last night already sat by the front door. She popped in the kitchen only to brew some coffee and fill up her travel mug, and then she was on the road.
Despite the way she and Cash had left things, her spirits were surprisingly high. This assignment felt more like an adventure than a job, and she was excited to get to work. Still, she made a point to text Cash when she reached the airstrip, then tucked her phone away and climbed aboard the private plane that would take her to La Ceiba.
The flight itself was uneventful. She was the sole passenger on the small aircraft, and she ended up sleeping for the duration of the five-and-a-half-hour trek.
When the pilot finally began their descent, Jen straightened up in her seat and turned to gaze out the window in the small cabin.
She’d been warned that October was the rainy season, but the sun was out and the sky was clear, and the sparkling turquoise water of the Caribbean Sea was calm and beautiful. From above, the north coast looked like a tropical paradise. As the plane dipped lower, she made out the colorful rooftops of the resorts dotting the shoreline, the lush greenery, the pristine white sand.
It was hard to imagine that people were suffering down there. Jen forced herself to remember that as she admired the scenery—she wasn’t here for a fun beach vacation.
Twenty minutes later, she was thanking her pilot for a smooth landing and getting off the plane via a set of rickety metal steps that creaked beneath her hiking boots. After a quick visit to the customs officer inside the hangar, she came face-to-face with the military escort the magazine had arranged for her.
The uniform-clad marine introduced himself as Private First Class Jamie Holbrook, and he was a lot younger than she’d expected. With his ruddy cheeks and ginger hair, he gave off a fresh-faced preppy vibe, and he was visibly awestruck as his gaze swept over her.
“Oh. Wow,” he blurted out after they’d shaken hands. “I wasn’t expecting you to be so…young.”
Jen knew that wasn’t at all what he’d wanted to say. He was blushing like a preteen, clearly affected by her looks.
“Yeah,” she said lightly. “It’s hard to believe I’m pushing thirty, huh?” When he tried to reach for her small canvas bag, she declined the gesture. “Don’t worry, I’ve got it. It’s not heavy.”
“Did you have a good flight?” he asked as they headed for the olive-green military Jeep parked outside the hangar.
“Yep. I slept the entire time.” Sunshine warmed her face, and she tipped her head to peer up at the cloudless sky. “It’s gorgeous out.”
“You must have brought the good weather with you,” Jamie said with a laugh. “It’s been pouring buckets all month. The sun finally decided to make an appearance.”
He hurried to the passenger side to open the door for her, and when she smiled in thanks, his cheeks turned bright red again. He cleared his throat, quickly averting his eyes. “It’s, uh, too bad you won’t be able to visit the coast. There are some amazing beautiful beaches here.” He made a face as he slid into the driver’s seat. “There’s a lot of not-so-amazing places, too.”
Jen’s tone went serious. “Yeah, I know. I don’t have any illusions about what this trip is about.”
“I know, but it’s still jarring,” he told her. “We were on our way to the Ulúa River the other day to run a training op with the local military and we drove through the most rundown town I’ve ever seen. All these children—I swear, I counted about thirty of them—swarmed our vehicles begging for food. The same thing happened in every town and village we passed through.”
“That’s awful.”
His expression darkened. “It’s even worse in the areas that are run by the maras. They take over entire towns, and you see these gang members and half of them are kids. Young fucking kids. Breaks your heart.”
Jen barely glanced at their surroundings as the Jeep ventured away from the airstrip. Palm trees and lush green hills whizzed by, but she was too focused on the bleak picture Jamie was painting.
“So your unit is here to train the Honduran military?” she asked.
He nodded. “We’ve been making a lot of progress, I think. Helping the local army better defend itself against the escalating violence. This last while we’ve been running river patrols, showing them how to enforce the waterways, but the conflict with the maras is heating up, so that’s becoming a priority. That, and stopping the drug runners.”
“Central America didn’t used to have such a drug problem,” she remarked.
“Yeah, well, with law enforcement cracking down on the Mexican cartels, a lot of them are moving their operations south.”
Jamie was more talkative than she’d expected, with a candid openness that Jen didn’t usually find in the tight-lipped SEAL community. Cash wasn’t able to talk to her about his missions—hell, he probably wouldn’t even if he could—but Jamie Holbrook was a wealth of information.
It didn’t take long to reach the local military base where Jen would be staying, but it took forever to get inside it. They drove through several checkpoints, and Jen had to hand over her press credentials at each one then wait while the guards verified her identity.
“You’ll be bunking in a single near the women’s barracks,” Jamie told her when they cleared the last checkpoint. “There’s a supply run to Guera in an hour. I’ll be accompanying you for that.”
“The army is delivering supplies to the village? Military supplies?”
“No, they’re providing protection for the Global Aid Foundation. The GA folks bring food and medicine to Guera once a month, but there’s been some trouble lately with the mara escorpión—local gang called the Scorpions, a real pain in the ass. They’ve taken to robbing the GA trucks. They ambushed last month’s shipment, so we’re there to make sure the supplies arrive safely and wind up in the right hands.”
The mention of the ambush sparked Jen’s panic. “Has your unit ever been ambushed?”
Jamie shook his head. “The maras usually stay away when they see the military. So far they’ve only attacked civilians, usually aid workers or medical staff. The relief personnel are starting to carry weapons now, but a lot of them still aren’t comfortable making runs without a military escort.”
He parked the Jeep in front of a large gray building. “You need to check in with Captain Reynolds, and then I’ll take you to your bunk to drop off your stuff. After that you’ll report to Sergeant Carrieri and he’ll outfit you with a ballistic vest and combat helmet.”
Jen froze. “Is that really necessary? My editor said the villages I’m going to are relatively safe.”
Jamie’s expression went grave. “Relatively safe? Yes. Completely safe? N
o.” His tone softened when he glimpsed her face. “Look, we’re not anticipating any trouble, but we still need to take precautions.”
She nodded weakly, a sliver of fear piercing her spine.
In that moment, she suddenly understood why Cash had been so determined not to let her go.
Chapter Five
‡
“Relax, man. You’re making me nervous pacing like that,” Seth grumbled from the couch.
Cash ignored his teammate and continued to wear a hole in his carpet. The thought of going back to his empty apartment after the day’s training had been depressing, so he’d invited himself over to Seth’s place, but the worry gnawing at his gut refused to let up. It felt like Jen was all the way on the other side of the world, rather than a measly five hours south of him, but Honduras might as well have been a different planet. San Diego was safe. She was safe in it. But she wasn’t here. She was in Central fucking America, surrounded by drug violence and gangs and a local military that couldn’t even protect its own borders.
She’s fine. She told you so herself.
Yeah, hours ago. Jen had texted to let him know she’d landed safely, then left him a message an hour later saying she was heading to the first village with her military escort. Cash hadn’t heard a peep since then and he was climbing the walls not knowing if she was okay.
“I’m serious, man. You’re freaking out the rugrats,” Seth said darkly.
“No, he’s not!” eight-year-old Sophie Masterson piped up.
“He’s fun to watch,” her twin brother Jason agreed.
The children’s voices were a swift reminder of his surroundings. Crap, he really shouldn’t be pacing like a madman while Seth’s kids did their homework on the carpeted floor. Sophie was sprawled on her stomach, her brown pigtails hanging over her small shoulders as she bent over her math book. Her brother was in a similar pose, but both kids were paying more attention to Cash than their notebooks.
“Sorry,” Cash mumbled. He collapsed on the sectional and raked both hands through his hair. “If it helps, I think I’m freaking out a million times harder. She only left this morning and I’m already worried sick, man.”