by Xyla Turner
No words were spoken but I could tell he needed something. Therefore, I let him take what he needed.
Making quick work of his belt and jeans, his pants dropped. Shiz lifted me so my back was against the wall and he was pressing into me with his seeking cock looking to enter. Once it found its intended location, I slid down with Shiz’s gaze on my neck. He completely filled me up and my mouth was open, yet no words escaped.
My talkative lover said nothing just slid me up and down on his hard cock. Our moans and his base need to release sent him on a steady course that fortunately directly rubbed my clit.
“Shiz!” I moaned. “You feel so good.”
This caused him to bite down on not just on my shoulder but everywhere. The man was marking me, and I didn’t mean one bite. He was angry and hurt but he needed to let go.
“Yes, Shiz,” I encouraged. “That’s it, honey. Right there.”
He started moving faster and I made my own little love mark on his neck.
“Yeess,” I finally said. “Yours.”
That was it.
He came and gripped my body to the point of sweet bruising that I did not mind one bit.
“Fuck,” he murmured as my legs started to come down to the ground.
We stood there for a while before he said, “Let’s go to bed.”
I nodded my head and followed him to the bed. His cum was trickling down my thigh, reminding me about the birth control question but that night didn’t seem like the best time to inquire.
The next morning, Shiz was still in bed. Therefore it was my turn to cook breakfast. Shiz got up a couple hours after me and once we were done eating, Shiz said he wanted to talk. The way he said this did not mean good things but I nodded and made my way to the living room.
We were sitting on the couch facing each other but the look on his face was solemn. It wasn’t quite dead like last night but it was serious.
“You’re scaring me.” I said. “What’s up?”
“When I tell you to do something, I need you to do it. Yesterday, I told you to stay down and you didn’t. Almost got yourself killed. We had it under control. Then you wound up in a mad man’s hands and I swear to fucking Christ I should have killed him. The only reason I didn’t, was because I knew it’d come back to bite me by affecting you. I know you’re used to doing shit on your own but you got a man now. I handle shit like that, so you never have to.”
All I heard was macho, macho, macho man. The song was running through my head because he made no sense.
“Shiz,” I said very politely. “You were about to get hurt. There was nothing else for me to do.”
His eyes flared when he said, “There was something else to do. Like what I told you to do.”
He seemed bent on this so I nodded. He was at a different place so I’d let him be there.
“Do you understand?” he asked.
“Yup.” I nodded.
He was quiet until we went to his shop. I chatted with Addy for a bit and I showed her my drawings. Well, she saw them in my bag, which was open and grabbed them. She gushed out loud at my various works and then called Shiz.
“Boss, you see these?” Addy called but I was shaking my head.
“It’s okay,” I tried to get my book back.
I felt like my drawings were a little too revealing and were not comfortable with Shiz seeing them, even though he’d seen some in the library. They were my black and white collection and did not include any of us or our time together. However, it was too late by the time he came over, Addy had pulled out various pieces and had them displayed on the counter.
“Wow!” His foul mood seemed to disappear. “Babe, these are good.”
“Thanks.” I nodded.
Then he picked up the one that I drew this morning. It was a man and woman making love against the wall. His fingers were pressed into her ass, her hands gripping strands of his hair with her muscular calves wrapped around his waist. The look on her face was the dead giveaway. Not the hair or the size of the woman but the expression on her face. Her eyes were open wide, cheeks flushed with a reddish brush stroke, mouth in the shape of an O. The type of O that would satisfy the thirstiest of mouths, hungriest of souls and filler of entire beings. Her face said what I’d never said and now, both Addy and Shiz were looking at it because it was obvious.
Her face said she was in love.
“I’ll go and uh, clean some tools,” Addy broke the silence and basically made a break for the back exit.
“You know what,” I said with a clap of my hands while gathering my work. “I’m just going to go to Peppers and help Dessy with the inventory.”
“Avery.” Shiz called my name.
“Yeah? I’ma go and I’ll see you later. Okay?” I didn’t let him talk. “Plus, it’s cool and all but we really can’t be around each other all the time. You know. You’ll get sick of me and vice versa. I should hang with the ladies and get the latest gossip, right. I have a tail. Promise not to get into any trouble.”
I was nearly pleading with the man to just let what he saw go and drop it.
“Avery,” he called again.
“Please,” I begged. “I’ll see you at Peppers.”
His head nodded once, and I made haste while gathering my items all over the counter.
“Catch a ride with Pint,” Shiz said. “He’s outside.”
“Yup,” I answered while leaving the building. When I arrived at the empty bar, there was a huddle of women in a corner with serious faces. I recognized them and moved toward that way.
“What’s wrong?” I gasped.
“Oh good, come in here.” Dessy motioned for me to get a chair.
It was Lori, Kylie, Shay, Dessy, Phoebe and Vida that I met last night. All eyes were on Vida.
“What happened?” I asked again.
“Vida, here, is explaining what happened with her and Swag last night.” Shay filled me in. “She just started. Okay, continue.”
“Right,” Vida’s eyes were semi-bugged out.
The strong woman looked spooked.
“So, after the guys all started acting funny and left, I got curious and tried to go to an exit. Swag was there and told one of his guys, Jug, to get me and if shit went down to take me to his place. I tried to protest, cause Mami, I don’t like no man telling me what I will and won’t do. But you’ve met these Guardians.” The ladies laughed. “He was having none of that shit. To make a long story short, I end up back at his place, pacing like a fool. Listen, honey, his place is the shit. I mean, everything is neat, clean, stainless steel this and marble that. It’s a townhouse but it’s the shit. I was envious, and my place is really nice. Anyway, so he gets back around three in the morning, looking all kinds of fucked up. I was ready to give him my spiel when the man, I swear to God, pinned me up against the wall and kissed me like my life depending on it. I can’t explain it, but it was one, heaven, and two, hot as hell. Then he says, “Sleep with me tonight”.” She mimics his deep voice. “Not going to fuck you, but sleep with me. Please”. So, I did, and it was kosher until this morning. I woke up with that man’s goatee in between my thighs and Papi knows what he is doing with that tongue. Three, you hear me. Three orgasms and they were not back to back. He built each one up using nothing but his tongue. Whew.”
Vida started fanning herself and rocking back and forth. Hell, we all were fanning ourselves and rocking with her. Swag was hot as hell. I mean something out of a boxing movie with him as the hero or villain. His hairline was always shaped up and it was clear that he took exquisite care of his body, grooming and self. There was nothing accidental about Swag.
“So, are you going to see him again?” Lori asked with bright eyes.
Vida’s face grew serious, then she said, “I don’t know. I mean it was good and I know whatever he’s packing between those legs would be better but I’m up for a promotion and this is not the time to lose myself in yet another man. No matter how good he looks. This job is important to me.”
We nodded, then Kylie said, “I get that, but if he’s the one he should understand that. I gave up my career to take care of my mom. Met Razor and the man built a studio on the side of the house to ensure that I not only kept doing what I loved but to take my career to another level if I chose to do so. We rent it out now, but that’s my point. A good man will be a partner and not a hindrance.”
Shay nodded, then added, “True. Bronx pays for my tuition for school. Ensured that I applied and everything.”
Lori nodded and said, “Right, Apollo’s the same way. You know this. I’ve told you.”
“Same here,” Dessy chimed in. “Bear can’t stand that I’m here, but he makes it a point to be here with me.”
Vida looked at each of us and I swear dread was written all over her face.
“I-I don’t know. He, uh, could break me, and I know I look really strong and all, but I’m not,” she shared.
I chimed in, “Look, I’m new to this gang and the Guardians. But what I can say with surety is that Guardians protect. They can’t help it, it’s who they are. I’m not saying people won’t be people and men won’t be men. I’m saying, his intentions aren’t to hurt you, even if he does. That has to count for something right? I can’t talk but I would give it a try but know that these ladies here,” I waved my hand around. “If you do fall, we’ll be here to catch you. You’re not on your own.”
“Now, that’s true,” Dessy chimed in.
All heads were nodding and for some reason that also gave me comfort.
Vida calmed down after that as we continued to talk about babies, men, and our jobs. I hated mine but what were the alternatives. No museums were calling me back because I was too chicken to even try. I hated dealing with clients and the insurance company, but I also wasn’t doing anything else. If anything, our conversation urged me to get up and do something. What was the worst that could happen?
* * *
I knew Jug was supposed to be my tail, but I used him as my chauffeur instead, since I couldn’t drive. We went to the mall, I peppered him with a thousand questions about the club, the mission and this notion of having a women’s club. I simply needed to learn how to ride a bike or we could just be a social club with no bikes. However, the actual motorcycle club was cooler since we could all have bikes.
Jug actually smiled the entire time and didn’t really answer any of my questions except to tell me he was a prospect. Which I knew but I guess that was code for he didn’t know shit or he wasn’t saying shit.
The man was a good listener though.
The art store was not my friend, since they called for my money like no other business. It was a part of my plan so that was fine too. I had to get out there and put myself before the organizations that involved what I wanted to do.
I had to do that for me.
No one else.
To show my thanks to Shiz, I made a special dinner after Jug told me he liked roast. along with some red potatoes, and asparagus with red wine and his trusty beer. I wanted to show him my appreciation, finally.
We were still weird, or weary of the other but it was still something. I was afraid to call it, but he’d made these declarations and commitment. Hell, I’d had sex with him. I also didn’t entirely know what that meant for him, me or us. He seemed to know but then earlier in the day, he seemed weird. After he saw that picture, it grew awkward.
Fast.
Therefore, when a brooding Shiz called to say he wouldn’t be over that night, I packed up his food and put it away. That night turned into three nights which was odd since I didn’t know that I’d grown almost dependent upon him, even if it was to simply be there. He texted, asked how I was doing but he never showed up. He wasn’t taking me to work but had instructed whoever was watching over me, to take me.
Once the week ended, I was at Peppers when I saw the girls in their usual place. After a few hours or so, the guys started coming through including Shiz. To say I was surprised would be an understatement. I was anxious and did not really know the best way to address him. So, when he saw me and his first comment was, “I didn’t know you were coming.”
My instantaneous response was, “What’s it matter to you?”
Well, well.
The ladies drew back in a quiet hush. Shiz drew back in an angry growl.
“Come again?” he replied in a menacing tone.
Instead of answering him, I turned my back on him.
Well, I guess I wasn’t in my right mind because he damn sure wasn’t in his. Shay’s eyes grew huge when she held up her hand and said in a warning tone, “Shiz.”
“Stay out of it, Shay,” he snapped at her. “Avery.”
The man was growling. His every word was a growl. The other women were looking nervous, but I just kept sipping my beer. It didn’t hit me how mad I really was about his absence. His let down.
It hurt, and I was no longer silly.
“Avery,” Shiz growled again.
I slowly turned and answered, “Yes.”
A tight smile was planted on my face. Yet, his was hard and etched with anger.
“What’s with the attitude?” he asked.
“No tude…” I shrugged my shoulders. “Just thought it was odd that I haven’t seen you in days and you show up here telling me what you expect.”
My shoulders went up in another indifferent gesture, then I smiled again.
“Can I help you with something?” I asked.
“Let’s talk outside.” He jerked his head to the side, but I didn’t move.
“No, maybe some other time. I came to chill with the ladies. This week has been an enlightening one and I just want to relax. You know what I mean. Need a break and all,” I shared.
Shiz’s face turned from human to a stone gargoyle in five whole seconds flat. Then he took a step into my space and said in a low voice, “Let’s go.”
“Not now, Shiz. Maybe we can chat via text. That seems to be the best method.” I realized I didn’t really care that I was probably poking the bear.
The ladies, to my surprise, gathered around me but I guess they saw what I didn’t. I saw his fist clenched and the etched granite face he had trained on me, but I knew he’d never harm me. So, I wasn’t scared but I also wasn’t about to move to his drum anymore. I knew how to play the drums. Well, metaphorically, I could. Physically, I’d probably sound like a toddler.
“That was you,” he hissed back.
My eyebrows went up because I didn’t know what he was talking about. Going through my memory bank, I tried to think of what could have been me, but I drew up a blank.
“What?” I asked.
“It was you.” He shared. “You’re the one that painted that picture and refused to discuss it. You brushed me off like we both didn’t know what it was. Like it was a fluke and not worth discussing. Then you’re going to stand here and get a fucking attitude with me for giving you space. You damn near ran out of my shop, so you’re mad because I backed up?”
Shiz was shaking his head and the move was directed towards me. It felt like he was saying, ‘Silly girl, tricks are for kids.’ Then he leans in a little closer to my face and asks with a snarkiness laced in his voice, “Take it you’re ready to talk now, huh?”
That little note had my arms crossing over my chest, then I tilted my nose up and said, “Actually, not really.”
One of his eyebrows rose, then he said, “Well, you know where to find me.”
Then, I swear to you, the man turned and walked away from me. Like, he turned his back on me and went to where the rest of the men were staring at us with curiosity. I couldn’t help but stare at his back as the emblem sewn into his cut grew smaller as he literally walked his ass away from me.
“Girl,” I heard Shay whisper.
“He’s just upset,” Lori chimed in.
Dessy and Kylie were silent, but I was fuming. I might have been wrong, but I also just got publicly dismissed.
Pure anger coursed through my body because I had a goo
d mind to go over there and slap his goddamn face. Or maybe just splash beer in it but for once in my life, I decided to make a calculated decision. The smart one that required planning, follow-through and time.
Pulling some money out my pocket, I threw the bills on the counter and said, “I’ll see y’all later. Can’t relax here.”
They tried to stop me, but I was already out the door, heading towards my detail. Jug was off but Jesse was back on. Once I hopped in, he smiled and said, “Leaving so soon.”
“Yeah, it was crowded in there.” I tried to smile, then buckled my seat belt. “Can we go?”
“Sure thing, sugar.” the redhead, freckled young man said.
Once I said goodnight, put on the deadbolt on both the kitchen and living room, I set about starting my plan.
Something had to change, and it was changing tonight.
Chapter Twelve
Shiz
This fucking woman was a pain in my ass and it took everything not to go in that house and kiss her until she told me what I wanted to hear.
Nope.
We were both taking the piss and I was miserable.
Sitting in my car watching over her was even more of a mistake because she was so close but so far away. Around two in the morning, I drove my ass home and tried to ignore the raging hard-on that I’d had for the past few days. My hand was of no help as he wanted one thing and she was not even talking to me.
The anger that coursed through my body was similar to when I finished burying my brother. I was alone again and upset with no release. My new brothers were instrumental to my transformation but now, it seemed more significant.
The loneliness.
My father.
My brother.
They were mine.
Her.
She was mine but now the pain in my chest reminded me that she wasn’t. That I was back in the very same place which made me think the ear-splitting migraine that was bringing me to my knees. That should have been my clue in the universe, that it was my time to go too.
Everyone that loved me was gone or left. Prematurely, at that. My pops was fifty-five. The man should have had thirty more years at least. He could have met her. Told me she was out of my league but wanted me to try. Not be afraid of taking a chance, but try.