Mibs says: Funny aside, I stuck it in my Bible and you’ll never guess what book it landed in. Or maybe you will…
Mibs says: G’night, Lucas. You do not know how badly I want to be able to add “I love you” to that.
The messenger warning that Luke would receive her message once he got online made her smile. Before she could sign off, Tina’s messenger box flashed on her screen with a message.
Tina says: Are you awake? Are you ok? I almost didn’t go in case you were coming down with something, but Luke promised he’d call his mom if you needed help.
Mibs says: I’m fine. Just a very long day.
Aggie says: Week, actually.
Tina says: Was Luke still there when you woke up?
Aggie says: Yep. I ate cake, he cleaned the kitchen, and we went for a walk. For the record, he knows what I’m thinking.
Tina says: This is a surprise to you?
Aggie says: Not a surprise-- just a terrifying reminder that I can’t keep my thoughts and feelings to myself.
Tina says: I don’t think he wants you to keep them to yourself.
Aggie says: But I want to know them and be comfortable with them before I broadcast it to everyone!
Tina says: Then keep him away from the house?
Aggie says: Cruel. You are cruel.
Tina says: And you’re half in love.
Aggie says: We’ve moved from if to when.
Tina says: If to when what?
Aggie says: We get married. At first, it was a definite, “if you ever care for me, this will happen.” Now we both treat it as if it’s a foregone conclusion.
Tina says: Well, duh. We all knew that.
Aggie says: I hoped, but I didn’t know.
Tina says: You’re always over thinking this stuff. Remember when Amy said that you liked Roger Cather? You spent a month analyzing every aspect of it while you tried to decide if she was right or not.
Aggie says: I decided I didn’t.
Tina says: Well, it’s possible that you did when you started, but man, you didn’t once it was over.
Aggie says: I suppose. Whatever, I just want to enjoy this.
Tina says: You’re not feeling pressured are you?
Aggie says: By Luke? Are you kidding? I have a feeling I’ll be tapping my toes by the time he decides to… whatever.
Tina says: It’s called proposing. Technically he’s already done it. He’s really just waiting for a yes signal so he can make it official.
Aggie says: I guess.
Tina says: You don’t sound like yourself.
Aggie says: He thinks I’m doing too much.
Tina says: I already said that.
Aggie says: He thinks the kids need time to “explore their own interests.”
Tina says: I said that too.
Aggie says: And the art teacher says that Ellie needs formal instruction.
Tina says: Didn’t Iris say not yet?
Aggie says: What does Tina say?
Tina says: I think you should keep her supplied with books, different media, and inspiration. She has a lifetime to develop her talent more formally, but she needs the opportunity to keep growing on her own too.
Aggie says: What about the others? Do they have talents we’re not exploring? Should I keep fabric around for Vannie? Let her play around with instruments in a music store? Sign her up for volleyball or basketball?
Tina says: Or just listen to her and see if she expresses an interest instead of trying to add more to your already cracking plate?
Aggie says: I think I need to go to bed. I’m worn out again.
Tina says: I can come back…
Aggie says: Enjoy your time with your dad. I’ll be fine. Luke won’t let me crash and burn. He is still angling for a wife.
Tina says: Preferably one with some spunk left.
Aggie says: Have I admitted how happy I think I’m going to be?
Tina says: Going to be? You’re already over the moon. Go to sleep.
Aggie says: Nighters
Tina says: *poofs*
Tossing Cookies
Chapter 24
Wednesday, October 29th
“No never alo-ooh-oooh-ne, no, never alone. He promised never to lea-ea-ve me, never to leave me alone.”
William heard Aggie’s song as he climbed the steps and shook his head. Now the girl was singing sappy country songs. Great. He should have known Aggie would get all girly over a guy. A slight pang hit his heart at the same time that a great wave of relief washed over him.
“The world’s fierce winds are blo--oo--oowing, temptation shaa-arp and keen. I have a peace in kno-oo-owing my Savior sta-ands between…”
A hymn. He should have known-- again. “Aggie?”
Her arm waved at him from the library. “In here.”
Glancing around at the empty house, William strolled into the library with the unconscious swagger his gun belt created. “Hey, where is everyone?”
“I didn’t get all the kids’ work graded today. They always have so much more on Wednesdays now, so Tina took them to their classes for me.”
“Couldn’t she have graded them? I’d think you’d want to get out of the house now and then.”
Aggie shook her head in amused disbelief. “Are you kidding? I’m never home. Haven’t you noticed that the 9-1-1 calls have ceased? We’re never here for Ian to commandeer the phone. That kid is going to think his car seat is an appendage to his backside.”
“And you thought that school was such a bad idea?”
“William! They’re ‘schooling,’ just not at the local elementary school. You act like they aren’t being educated at all!”
He leaned his hands on the desk and locked eyes with her. “How do I know they are?”
“Why is it any of your business?”
Had William not been so certain of his superior opinion, he’d have heard the steel in her voice. “Didja ever notice the badge?” His attempt at a joke failed miserably.
“How could I not? You slap me upside the head with it every chance you get! Are you here on official business? Am I being charged with a crime?”
“Of course, not! What kind of question is that?”
“Then I think you should just leave.”
Stunned, William started to protest, and then shook his head and stormed out of the room. At the door, Mrs. Dyke shoved a plate of cookies into his hand and pushed him back into the house. “Get in there, boy.”
“Mrs.--”
“You heard me. Move.” The fierce look on the elderly woman’s face would have frightened anyone.
In the library, Aggie looked up, ready to forcibly remove him to keep her sanity and saw Mrs. Dyke. “Hello!” She gave William a pointed look. “Thank you for helping Mrs. Dyke. I won’t keep you.”
“Yes you will. I heard the boy. He was rude and imperious-- as usual.”
“Wha--”
“Stuff it, William.” The women, younger and elder, spoke in unison and then giggled.
“What did I do! I don’t get it.”
“William, son, remember the hand signal issue? From what I heard, this is that times ten.” Mrs. Dyke took the cookies from William and handed them to Aggie. “Have a cookie. They’re sweeter than his disposition anyway.”
“You can’t do it all, Aggie. I know you think you’re super--” A cookie sailed across the room and at William’s head before even she knew she’d done it.
“That was mature,” he remarked as he picked up the cookie. Another one whizzed its way across the room and hit him in the chest.
“Bull’s-eye.”
“Aggie! Grow up--” He couldn’t finish his indignant protest before Mrs. Dyke lobbed one at him too. “What is this?”
Unlike Luke, who would have returned fire, William stood there, disapproval lined in every feature, while Aggie and Mrs. Dyke pelted him with every single cookie on the plate, gasping in laughter by the time the last ones left their fingers. “Do you feel better now?”
&
nbsp; “Actually, I do. I need to hurry and pick them up before the ten minute rule ends,” she joked as she grabbed the plate and started to clean up the cookie mess.
“Ten second rule.”
“Do you have to do that? Do you always have to do that? I can’t believe you.” Shoving the plate into his hands, Aggie stormed upstairs, slamming her door behind her.
“I think this is too much for her. Did see that? And what was with you throwing too?”
Winnie Dyke pointed to the floor. “Pick them up, William. You were so out of line it isn’t funny. I can’t believe I got you a date with her.”
“I--”
“That young woman,” the furious neighbor began, “is doing the job of three women, alone, without the support of a loving husband, and better than most people ever do including myself and your mother.”
“That was low.”
“It was true. You like to preach about truth; well, here’s a truth for you. Your words just stripped her of her self-respect. You don’t know it all, William. Your pride was always your weakest point, and now you’ve used it to beat a woman emotionally. You’re no better than your mother.”
His arrogance fizzled as he stared dumbstruck at the woman before him. Pain filled his eyes as he choked, “Mama Dyke--”
“You know I love you, William. I’ve loved you since you were old enough to toddle across the street. I’ve spoiled you out of compassion for all you’ve been through, but I can’t let you hurt that woman. It’s hurting you too. You’re going to hate yourself when you can see what you’ve done.” On tiptoe, Mrs. Dyke gave “her boy” a kiss on the cheek, caressed it just as she had when he’d come to her broken over the latest attack from his mother, and shuffled back out of the house and home again.
Cookies littered the floor around his feet-- two crushed by footsteps. He took a deep breath as he picked up the first, still wounded by Mrs. Dyke’s words. You’re no better than your mother. The accusation echoed in his mind until he thought he’d go crazy. Had Aggie said it, he would have gone through the roof, but how could he unleash the wrath building in him on the only person who had ever shown him a mother’s love and care?
With each cookie replaced on the plate, William’s self-righteous indignation returned--this time, directed toward Aggie. She’d done this. Once again, she’d played the helpless victim card rather than facing the fact that sometimes people need help. The irony of that thought contorted his face into further disgust until he was ready to storm up the stairs and unleash all the pent up fury on the one person who needed to hear it most. Yes, Aggie definitely needed to hear a little “faithful wounding” of her own.
By the time all cookies were nestled on the plate once more, William had, once again, resolved that Aggie needed to hear the hard truth--she couldn’t handle the job alone. For the briefest of seconds, he was tempted to take his concerns to Ellene. She had the ability to make Aggie see sense. No, that wouldn’t work. If Ellene wanted to, she could have the children removed for neglect, endangerment, and educational neglect. The clinic records--
His thoughts were arrested by Luke whistling up the steps and into the house. “Aggie? You here?”
“She’s upstairs.” Before William could say anymore, Aggie flew down the stairs, sobbing into Luke’s arms.
An awkwardness filled the room as William tried not to watch Luke comfort Aggie. The tender way he had with the young woman was something William couldn’t have imitated had he tried, and he knew it. Something akin to remorse pricked his heart as he saw how distraught she truly was. Had he been that unkind? He hadn’t meant to be. He’d tried to show her that she needed to leave things to professionals and not expect so much of herself. Was that so wrong?
He couldn’t leave. Luke and Aggie blocked his way. It’d be even more awkward to try to scoot past them. He waited for the comforting to morph into a make-out session, but thankfully it didn’t. Luke managed to quiet Aggie and convince her to go back upstairs. William didn’t know what she’d told him, but it looked like Luke intended to have words. Well, he could throw a few well chosen ones out himself.
“William--”
“Do you see how overwrought she is? You’ve got to protect her from herself.” He expected Luke to interrupt or argue with him, but Luke Sullivan stood waiting for him to finish. “Well?”
“Are you through?”
“I-- Well-- For now.”
“Then I have a few things to say.” Luke’s expression grew serious--almost stern. “Actually, I have a question. Can Aggie do anything right in your eyes?”
“Of course! She’s a wonderful ‘mother’ to those kids. She obviously loves them and protects them as best she can. They’re well fed, clothed… why?”
“Have you ever told her those things?”
William frowned. “You know I have.”
“Let me rephrase. Do you leave her with the impression that you think well of her or that you think her incompetent?”
“She’s not incompetent. She’s just overworked. She’s always asking for help, Luke. You’ve heard her when she’s tired or frustrated. She’ll admit she can’t do it.”
Luke shook his head as if unable to believe what he heard. “Anyone will say anything when weary. Sometimes Aggie just wants someone to acknowledge she’s struggling without trying to teach her some great lesson or prove that the job is beyond her. She just needs to know that someone cares. She did this for months before she ever came here and without the help she has now. We offer this help because we love her and want to care for her, not because she’s doomed to failure without us.”
Unaccustomed to Luke speaking more than half a dozen words at a time, William actually listened. With Mrs. Dyke’s reproof echoing in his mind, he nodded. “Can I go up?”
“Go for it. Just don’t--”
“I won’t.”
William took the stairs slowly. For the first time that he could remember, he felt the impulse to pray outside his carefully scheduled prayer time. That impulse slammed into his chest making his heart feel burdened beyond anything he’d ever imagined. Step by step, he poured out his confusion, his concerns, and his desire to help rather than hurt. By the time he reached Aggie’s room, he felt a peace steal over him so gently that he felt almost caressed by it.
“Aggie?”
“William, please--”
“Can I come in?” He didn’t try to explain yet.
“I--” She took a deep breath. “Ok. Come in.” Resignation was chiseled into every corner of her face.
With a tentativeness that he’d never felt before, much less displayed, William crossed the room to the loveseat near the window and sat next to her, taking one of her hands in his. “I am so sorry. I think I understand now-- somewhat anyway. I see how I hurt you. That much I know for sure, and I am so sorry.”
Without a word, Aggie curled against him, much as his little sister had so many years ago, and gripped his shirt in her hands. “I forgive you.”
All his life, William James Markenson had been told that the most powerful words in the world were “I love you,” but one fall afternoon he decided that equally powerful were their companions. “I forgive you.”
~*~*~*~
Four pounds, three jabs to the doorbell, and finally a “Open this door, William Markenson,” finally woke William from his impromptu nap. He stumbled from his chair, almost tripping over the ottoman, and unlocked the deadbolt, one hand on the holster he’d forgotten to remove. “Tina--”
“You have some nerve, buddy.”
“I told her I was sorry. I didn’t want or mean to hurt her.”
Tina’s clear blue eyes swam with unshed angry tears. Something, he couldn’t identify what, swept over him as he watched her accuse him of cruelty, arrogance, and ignorance. By the time she sputtered her last accusation and turned to leave, he’d identified that feeling. Attraction. Oh, she’d kill him if he said anything now, but he had to try.
“Tina?”
“Yeah.”
“I was wrong. Aggie forgave me. Can you forgive me?”
“I don’t know.”
Her choked back sob confused him. Why should she be so upset? Before he thought through the idea, William found himself sharing the “conversation” he’d had with Mrs. Dyke. “Mama Dyke said something today that scared me, Tina.”
Instinctively, he knew that if he had used any other word but scared, she might not have listened, but the word wasn’t chosen to manipulate. She turned, her eyes slowly raising to meet his, allowing him a breath of relief. “What?”
“She said that I’d become like my mother. She said I used untrue and cruel words to emotionally beat Aggie.”
“You did.”
“I didn’t mean to. I really was trying to help, but I think I understand now. Luke said something that really struck home.”
“You don’t know how close you came to being decked.” A sob caught on her last word.
“Tina?” His hand reached to brush the tears that finally fell from her lashes.
“I have to go.”
“Why did you come?” As dense as William had been, he was starting to understand several things.
“Bye.”
In a calculated risk, William reached out for her as she turned and pulled Tina into his arms. “I wish you’d forgive me.”
“I’m afraid to.”
His hands looked as though they could crush her as he wrapped them around her waist. Tina was so petite! “Afraid for Aggie or afraid for you?”
“Both?”
“Is that a question?” William fought the temptation to laugh. The last thing he wanted to do was add to the rift between them.
“You tell me.” She refused to look at him as she whispered, “I like you, William. I think you have a lot of first-rate qualities, but this is the second time you have belittled and deeply hurt my friend. I’m afraid to let myself be vulnerable to you.”
“You could play traffic cop.”
“Huh?” Her eyes met his, but she didn’t step out of his arms.
“If, or more likely when, I do that again, you could hold your hand up like a cop stopping traffic. I did that to Aggie once and she almost killed me for it.”
For Keeps (Aggie's Inheritance) Page 38