by Amanda Doyle
He chuckled wickedly. Murtie, the incorrigible!
Rennie found herself grinning back understandingly before she sauntered back towards the homestead to help Elspeth start the lunch.
That evening, Chad’s place at the head of the table was conspicuously empty and next day it was the same. But on Sunday, as dusk was falling, there was a droning noise in the sky as his Aztec banked over the homestead and settled on to the landing-strip.
Rennie felt her stomach muscles tighten in a curious way, and when she went to the veranda to peer out through the gauze, she found that she had consciously to unclench her fingers which were curled tightly into her palms.
It was something of a surprise to find that Chad had not returned alone.
As he came through the white gate and crossed the lawns to the front steps, Leith Mindon walked at his side. Chad carried a pigskin case as well as his own weekender, and Rennie could only presume that it must belong to the pretty red-headed girl for whom he was even now opening the gauze-meshed door.
Leith smiled, stepped delicately in on to the veranda and Chad removed his broad-brimmed hat and followed.
‘ ’Evening, Renata.’ Rennie didn’t receive the same warm smile as Chad had done. Instead, the girl’s manner was reserved, noticeably cooler than it had been that other time they had met.
She walked along the veranda to the guest-room, and Chad carried her case in that direction too. Leith knew her way about this house very well indeed. It was obvious that she had adopted a certain authority and possessiveness when within its walls, almost as if she were already the mistress of Barrindilloo homestead, and not just the intended mistress!
At tea-time that same night, she took her place at the opposite end of the table to Chad himself. This secretly surprised Rennie, who had thought she would probably wish to sit beside him on his right-hand side, in the guest’s place of honour. It seemed, however, that Leith preferred the role of hostess to that of visitor. She signalled to Mayra to place the huge silver teapot before her so that she could pour, and a short time afterwards it was she who rang for the water-jug to be replenished.
‘I must show Nellie how to keep this silver from getting tarnished,’ she remarked pleasantly to Ash at one point, peering critically at the embossed leaf-design on the jug. ‘And I think she’s leaving half the polish there, without rinsing it properly afterwards, too. Those lubras will get off with anything if they’re allowed. They’re apt to think a nice wide smiles makes up for all sorts of laxness and deficiencies.’
‘It was I who cleaned the silver last,’ Rennie admitted hastily, lest the innocent Nellie should be blamed for something for which, this time at least, she most certainly was not responsible. ‘Perhaps I’m not very good at it,’ she added humbly.
‘Hardly your line, is it,’ said Leith sweetly, ‘so I suppose you can be forgiven. Lack of domesticity probably doesn’t matter a hoot in the model girl’s world, but I can assure you that a practical background is of great importance when running an isolated homestead such as this one, and especially when dealing with those lazy aboriginal girls. One must be able to do everything one expects one’s underlings to do—and do it a great deal better than they, at that!’ She popped a small square of buttered toast into her mouth, and when she had eaten it, went on to observe modestly, ‘I’ve been fortunate to have been doing that sort of thing all my life, ever since I was quite small. Now it’s second nature to me—no effort, although of course I love the outdoor life even more than the indoor one. I can understand you saying the Outback is so boring, though, Renata, and it’s only to be expected, really.’
Rennie’s brows rose in surprise. ‘I?’ She blinked. ‘I don’t remember saying any such thing!’
Leith’s eyes rested on the other girl’s slowly flushing face with some amusement.
‘Oh, come now, of course you did! No need to be coy in front of Chad, just because we all know he’s so wrapped up in his beloved Barrindilloo. No need to spare his feelings by pretending, even if we were having a girlish exchange of confidences at the time. He’s not in the least offended, are you, darling?’
Now it was Chad’s turn to look at Rennie. He did so with one of those penetrating and discomfiting glances, for whose brevity on this particular occasion Rennie was thankful.
‘Not in the least,’ she was politely assured, in a deep, uncompromising tone. ‘It’s quite understandable that you should feel that way, Renata. As Leith so truly says, it’s only to be expected.’
But I don’t! I didn’t! Rennie wanted to protest—and to her own astonishment she realized that that was true. There was so much here that she didn’t find boring, even though she might have thought she would. So mufeh! There were all her friends, for instance—the comfortable Elspeth, the undemanding Ash, the irrepressible Murtie, those two laughing, dark-eyed lubras and the mischievous Harry Goola with his smelly, funny old pipe. There was the chuckling kookaburra and the shrilling cockatoo, the wind that came in warm gusts off the plain and sighed so pensively in the coolibahs, the yapping of the dogs and the yabbering of the piccaninnies, the possum that swung so cheekily from his tail and peered inquisitively into the light of Magda’s torch when its beam discovered him, the scuttling black water-hens down at the pool and the cock that crowed a mournful salute as Chad’s heavy steps sounded along the veranda in the first hushed light before the sun rose each day.
She swallowed. Why had Leith attributed such an impossible remark to her? she wondered, distressed. When had this ‘girlish exchange’ taken place? Rennie could not remember any such occasion, try as she might. Why, the fact was that she had seen too little of Leith for there even to have been an opportunity for such a discussion!
‘It was kind of you to clean the silver, Renata.’ Chad’s voice spoke quite gently beside her. His eyes were suddenly quizzical and kind as if he sensed her distress, though of course he could not possibly guess at the reason. ‘Especially as you aren’t accustomed to doing such things.’
‘Don’t mention it,’ Rennie returned shortly. She felt angry, ruffled. Angry with both of them. She wished—oh, how she wished—that Leith Mindon had not come back tonight to stay! Of how long she was intending to remain neither she nor Chad had so far given any indication. As for Leith herself, she gave the impression that she was permanently installed, or would like to be!
Things weren’t the same as they had been at all, now that she was here. The air prickled with unspoken comments, the silences were somehow fraught and tense, and nobody seemed to be behaving normally any more. Magda turned suddenly fractious. Ash became withdrawn and cautious, Elspeth was no more than respectfully civil, and Nellie and Mayra flitted around the table like a couple of nervous and gaudy butterflies in their bright cotton overalls, their thin hands trembling as they grabbed at the dishes with unfamiliar haste.
After the meal, Leith rose from her chair and went away to the veranda with Chad, having first asked Mayra to bring drinks there.
‘Two glasses,’ she had requested, ‘some sliced lemon. And please be sure that the water is iced.’
It wasn’t until she was getting ready for bed that she saw Leith again that evening. Rennie was seated at her dressing-table in her soft voile peignoir, of a vivid peacock-blue which Rennie particularly liked, and which somehow made her pale blonde hair seem even lighter than usual, like liquid gold spilling over her shoulders. Rennie turned when she heard a step outside and when the door opened, saw that it was Leith who entered.
‘Hullo.’ Leith herself was still dressed. ‘I’m just off to bed, too. Thought I’d just look in to say good night’
She sank down in the only armchair in the room and eyed Rennie with interest as she began to cleanse her face with the meticulous thoroughness of her profession. As their gazes met in the reflected glass, she smiled and remarked generously,
What marvellous hair you have, Renata! I suppose that’s how you got to be a model in the first place.’ Rennie smiled back. Leith was undoubtedly in a
more friendly mood.
‘That, and a lot of hard work as well. It isn’t all fun, you know. There’s a tremendous amount of self-discipline attached to it if you want to be successful— and a good proportion of luck as well,’ she added honestly.
‘And you were lucky?’
Rennie thought about that. She thought of those tiresome, endless sessions of posing, changing, posing; of the early mornings, the late nights; the flashing bulbs; the clipped instructions, the terse commands, the applause if all went well. But it hadn’t all been like that, of course. There’d been those trips to the sun, away from England’s capricious climate, to faraway, exotic places, to have the tedium and vary the pace. It all seemed a world away, now. Unreal, a rather improbable, dream.
‘Yes, I believe I was lucky,’ she returned thoughtfully, reaching for a tissue in the box beside her. ‘I got all the breaks that were going. I was lucky.’
Here at Barrindilloo there was sun, too. Plenty of it. All the sun one could possibly want. Sun and peace and time to think. In a way, there was an exotic quality about this place, too. In its individuality it was every bit as strange and exciting as the Bahamas and Bermuda and Majorca and Corfu—even as exciting, probably, as Fez would have turned out to be! Rennie had a feeling that there possibly wasn’t another place in the whole world quite like Barrindilloo. It was unique, just as every great lonely cattle station was of itself unique—each carrying an identity, a character, all its own.
‘You miss it?’
Rennie thought some more.
‘It’s difficult to give a straight answer to that,’ she said hesitantly. ‘In ways, I do.’
‘But you’ll be going back to it very soon now, won’t you? When are you actually planning to leave?’
‘Leave?’ Somehow, Rennie was startled. With Leith’s last question came the astonishing realization that it was several days since the thought of leaving Barrindilloo had even entered her mind. Days. Nearly a week, in fact.
‘Yes, leave.’ Leith had straightened up in a businesslike way. Her former idle, friendly manner had again disappeared. ‘I seem to remember that you were to come in order to see Magda safely installed and settled. Well, she is, isn’t she? She appears perfectly at home here, so far as I can observe—and that is one of the particular reasons for my visit just now, to ascertain just how she has settled down. It’s more than obvious that she’s happy. Her lessons seem to be progressing, she works the set herself for the School session each morning, joins in the chatter, rides her pony. She’s attached to Elspeth and Ash, and one would almost say that Chad is her idol. I believe she actually prefers him to you,’ finished Leith with surprising and calculated cruelty.
Rennie felt the chill shock of surprise at the other girl’s sudden volte-face. It feathered over her in an unpleasant, shivering wave. In the mirror she could see herself paling visibly, so that her complexion was as white as the cream she had daubed in tiny dots upon her cheeks. Her eyes seemed enormous, hollow, bewildered.
‘What are you trying to say?’ she managed to ask quietly, trying to mask the apprehension in her question. ‘You didn’t come here just to wish me good night, I think, Leith, after all—did you?’
The other looked faintly uncomfortable, but determined.
‘You’re quite right, Renata, I didn’t. I came because one of us had to, and Chad—’ She shrugged meaningly, continued, ‘One of us had to point out to you that you can’t go on trespassing on his hospitality for ever. After all, a bargain is a bargain. He has kept his side of it, so don t you think, now that the object of your mission has been accomplished, that the time has come for you to retire gracefully?’
The silence in the room was oppressive. It seemed to settle over Rennie in a sort of smothering cloud, so that she felt herself fighting for breath. Oh, this was awful! Ghastly! Unbelievable! That they should have to ask her to leave! That Chad should find her presence here at his homestead so—so intolerable that he found it necessary to enlist Leith’s help in getting rid of her!
Rennie recalled that brutal kiss with a shiver. It lay between them now, an embarrassment to him, obviously. He wanted her out of his way now, just as quickly as possible, and in truth, there was no reason why she should have stayed even as long as she already had. It was just that she had suddenly found that the days were rushing by without her even noticing how fast they sped. Of course she was longing to go! Of course she was wanting to see Magda settled, to get back to Keith! Hadn’t her heart been singing over that very prospect when she had wandered down to the yards the other day? And it was since that day—that kiss!—that Chad had suddenly found her very being here quite insupportable! What a blow to one’s pride, to be asked to leave in this manner, when one had been intending to go quite soon in any case! Already her welcome here had been clearly outstayed—ever since the moment when Chad’s firm, cool lips had come down upon hers in that calculatedly chastising manner. Since that very moment, she’d been outstaying her welcome with every minute that she spent here, and now they’d found it necessary to ask. They’d discussed it between them, discussed her!
Rennie’s cheeks were suffused with hot colour. She put her hands up to her face, and her palms felt hot and moist too.
‘I—of course I shall go,’ she said in a strangled voice. ‘I—I’ll leave tomorrow.’
There was a perceptible change in Leith’s expression, a quickly controlled surprise at Rennie’s precipitate offer of co-operation. Such a reaction had been clearly unexpected.
‘No, not tomorrow,’ she replied firmly—and you’d have said there was almost actual alarm behind that firmness. ‘Let’s keep it civilized, shall we? I mean, you don’t want to embarrass Chad by just rushing off suddenly, do you? And what would Magda think? And the rest of the people here, if you just dropped everything and left without any prior announcement?’ She smiled more kindly as she continued appeasingly, ‘No, Renata, I didn’t mean that, and I’m sorry if my talking to you like this has caused you any unnecessary distress. All I meant to point out was that the time has come when you should be thinking of a departure date, at least a tentative one. For Magda’s sake. And ours. Chad’s and mine. You’ll need to wait till after the race meeting. After all, Chad put it off till now on account of you and Magda coming, so it would be a bit churlish not to be there for it. But once it’s over you could just sort of say, “Well, I think it’s time I was getting back to work,” or something—quite casually, just as one normally would do—and then go. I think that would be the best and most tactful thing to do, don’t you?’
‘Y-yes, of course. Whatever you suggest,’ muttered Rennie, still upset. ‘I—I’m sorry if I’m in the way. I—’
‘No, you aren’t in the way, not in the meantime,’ Leith stressed soothingly. ‘It’s just that Chad and I—well, Chad thinks I should start cultivating a deeper relationship with Magda as soon as possible, and I really can’t start while you’re here, can I? I’ll do very much better once I have her to myself.’
‘Yes, I can see that,’ Rennie acknowledged fairly. She felt herself drooping with weariness, as exhausted as if she had run a ten-mile race. ‘I’ll do as you have said, Leith. And—I—I’m truly sorry you found it necessary to prod me on like this. I should have realized that it was time I handed over the reins, as I agreed with Chad that I would do in the first place, providing Magda was happy here.’
‘Don’t mention it.’ Leith stood up, apparently satisfied. She spoke almost gaily. ‘I knew you’d see it that way, Renata. Well, I really must go to bed now. Chad has promised to take me for an early morning ride tomorrow. Good night.’
‘Good night, Leith.’
Rennie performed the rest of her toilet that night woodenly, gazing unseeingly at her reflected image, hardly aware of what she was doing. Then she crept between the sheets, and oddly enough, slept almost at once.
Even her mind seemed vacant, numb, so that her thoughts did not torment her, as they otherwise might have done. Her brain was a void, and
there were no thoughts there at all, just a woolly sort of unreal feeling.
When the kookaburras started their dawn-time laughter to ensure that the world might enjoy another day, Rennie heard two lots of steps along the veranda this time—Chad’s own familiar, measured ones, and a brisk, light tap-tap that Leith’s daintier riding-boots made on the boards as they followed. Shortly after that came the sound of thudding hooves as their horses cantered off, away from the homestead buildings towards the open plain.
Two days later Leith left to return to her own home.
Mail-days at Barrindilloo always held a certain amount of excitement, but the one some days after Leith had left proved more rewarding than usual for Rennie, for it contained a letter for her from Keith.
An air of expectancy always hovered over the entire homestead when mail-day came around. You somehow knew, from the first waking moment in the morning, that this was going to be a day quite different from the others. The frogs trilled louder from the edge of the creek, and the kookaburras chuckled more jubilantly than usual to tell the inhabitants of their locality that something special was going to happen.
The men did not go out from the homestead on this particular day. Instead, others rode in. From early morning there was a steady stream of newcomers trickling over the plain towards the homestead, many of them people whom Rennie did not know. They sat about under the shade-trees down near the quarters, yarning with the station-hands and jackeroos, swopping tobacco and papers and improbable stories, until the moment arrived when they all stood up and came out from under the trees to tilt their hats and squint up into the sun as the drone of the mail-plane impinged upon their conversation, and the light reflected upon its tilting silver wings. On this day, too, both Chad and Ash were apt to retire immediately after breakfast to their respective offices, to deal with the last of their outgoing correspondence, while Elspeth busied herself m the kitchen preparing the pilot’s favourite dishes, m exchange for the titbits of gossip she could expect to receive from him while he ate.