by S Lawrence
Nothing. I glance back at him, and he jerks his head at me even as he types furiously on his phone. I widen my eyes at him. I know, man, I know.
“Thea,” I try again, a bit more forcefully. Her brow furrows and the flames dance higher. Shit.
The song she was humming pops into my head. I look back at him then back up at her. Worth a shot, I guess. I cross to the closet and grab the knob, barely muffling the scream as my skin melts against the hot metal. That was really fucking stupid, Dagen.
Jerking it open and pulling my hand free at the same time, I reach in and pull the case out. I carry it over to the dresser and lay it on top. Lucifer is at my side in an instant and takes my hand, healing it as best as he can as quickly as he can. He is surprised when I pull out the trumpet.
I pour my power into the hot metal to cool it enough to play. Focusing on the tune she was humming, I turn to her and try my best to recreate it on the old instrument. It sounds as good today as it did in the twenties. The notes are pure and clear.
She comes awake slowly. Blinking, confused, and then her eyes clear, and a blood curdling scream fills the air along with heat like nothing I’ve ever felt in Hell.
She falls as the wings begin to flap wildly. Shit, the bed is on fire.
“Luc,” I yell.
“Torryn is on his way?” I shake my head. “His fire. I think he should be able to touch her.”
I shake my head harder. No way is he touching her when she’s naked. “Charlie,” I yell her name.
She finally locks onto me. “Help me, Dagen.” She is standing in the middle of a burning bed untouched by the flames.
“Girl, you are like the Khaleesi right now. The flames aren’t going to hurt you, but you’ve got to rein them in or you are going to burn the whole place down.” Her head moves side to side rapidly in denial.
“I can’t. I’m not doing this. I don’t know how,” she argues.
“You are, baby.” I take a step closer to her and her eyes widen. “You have to stop it.” I take another.
She cries out as blisters start to bubble on my skin, but I merely grit my teeth together. Another moment and the room starts to smell a little like meat cooking.
“Dagen, stop. Please, don’t do this.” Tears are streaming down her cheeks.
“I believe in you, baby.” She holds her hand out trying to stop me, but I reach for her. We both see my skin start to blacken at the same time.
“Please.” She falls to her knees in the flames.
I smile at her. “I trust you, Thea.” And I realize I do - her bravery, her spirit, just her.
She looks at me then as the flames flicker and then disappear, leaving behind just gorgeous golden wings. I collapse as Luc extinguishes the rest of the flames in the room. She climbs through the ash to me, but he stops her just as she would have grabbed me.
I feel the heat burst from her. “Don’t, baby. He’s trying to help me.” She starts to cry.
“You can’t touch him, Charlie. It will make the burns so much worse.” It’s the last thing I hear before his light hits me and sends me to darkness and peace.
I hate to leave her but welcome relief from the never-ending pain.
Chapter 23
CHARLIE
I’ve killed him again.
This time, I actually did it myself. I look back at the gigantic wings I had so wished for and I want to rip them from my back. They represent nothing but destruction.
I really am cursed. My legs collapse beneath me as the weight of what I’ve done sinks in. My eyes bounce around the room, and I see nothing but powdery ash, white from the heat of the flames, the remnants of the paint bubbled and blackened. His clothes are in tatters, only pieces still clinging to the hangers. Smoke still perfumes the air, even with Luc making the windows disappear. I’m still there on the floor, letting my tears wash away the ash that has clung to my face when Torryn bursts into the room only minutes later. Lillian is right behind him. I look at her in desperation and shame.
They both skid to a halt, taking in the ruin, both of the room and of Dagen.
“I’m sorry.” Lillian shakes her head and comes to kneel in front of me. I try to scoot back away from her, terrified that I will incinerate her next with no warning. “Please. I don’t want to hurt you.” My head is shaking and I push at her with my out-stretched hands.
“Charlie, you won’t hurt me.” Lucifer’s head shakes just the slightest amount, but I see it and so do they. “She won’t.”
She’s insane. She has to be as she steps closer and sits at my side.
“Tell me what happened.” I can’t. Instead, I stare at Dagen. I think he’s dead.
“Is he...?” I can’t say the rest.
“No. I just put him as far under as I could.” Lucifer sighs but I plead with him silently for the truth. “The burns, at least some of them, go completely to the bone. The pain…” He swallows. “The flames are angel fire, worse than anything in Hell. I can’t imagine the pain. It’s why I couldn’t stop you or them.”
Looking at Lillian, I wait for the condemnation but I flinch when I see sympathy.
“Don’t.” I hate how angry the word sounds, and so does Torryn, if his glare is anything to go on.
“It’s not your fault,” she whispers as she leans closer.
“Lillian, please.” Torryn voice is hard.
“I love you but shut up.” She softens the words with a smile. “You don’t have any idea what this is like. I do.” She turns her face back to face mine.
“I fell asleep bummed I didn’t get wings.” I shake my head as I run my finger over the feathers trapped under me.
“You certainly have them now.” She smiles and reaches out for them, but I shift to keep her from touching them.
“I don’t know how or why,” I try to explain.
“Neither did I. Caliel helped with that.” She looks back at Lucifer. “Have you called him?”
“Not yet. I wanted to try to get Dagen helped as much as I could. He didn’t have much recovery time since the Fallen attack.” I feel my heart actually breaking at his words.
“Luc.” Lillian glares and he looks at me.
Yep, both my fault.
“Call him. Maybe he can help with both things,” she urges as I feel the hairs on my arms stand.
Torryn and Luc use their power to cocoon and float Dagen up off the floor, his body hovering over the bed. I try to look away but I can’t. Tears streak down my cheeks, and I feel an ugly breakdown boiling just below the surface. I don’t try to fight it; I let it come.
I want to run but I can’t leave him. I told him I’ve chosen him, chosen to fight. I will not abandon him to a death I’ve caused.
I have to do something. Swallowing, I start to push up when a man appears at the foot of the bed.
“Caliel.” Lillian smiles briefly before sobering once more. “Please.”
The man looks the direction she nods and his eyes widen. “What?”
“Angel fire,” Lucifer murmurs, almost too quietly for me to hear.
“Angel fire?” The one called Caliel yells. “How?”
A single jerk of Lucifer’s head and the man turns and looks down at me. That’s it; time to face the music. I stand and move in front of the man, marveling at the ebony smoothness of his skin. He studies me close.
“You are the second.” I nod. “You have chosen?” I nod again. “Wings?” I feel my cheeks heat but nod once more.
“Caliel, this is Charlie. Her wings are coated, or at least, can be engulfed, in angel fire.” Lucifer stops and smiles slightly at me. “They appeared while she slept. Dagen woke her.”
It seems a simple explanation for something completely horrifying.
“Help him. Please.” I grab the man’s arm, and silence falls as he glances down. I get the distinct impression that like Lucifer, this man is not used to being touched. I try to ignore the almost electrical current that tingles through my fingers but I can’t. He is like the others, like Luc, m
ore than Dagen. He is more powerful. “Help me.”
He glances back at Dagen before locking his strange eyes on mine. “I will do what I can but I can’t promise anything. I’m sorry.” He says the last as I feel what little hope that had bloomed at his appearance wither in my chest.
‘Don’t blame yourself, sweetheart.’ I jump at Dagen’s voice whispering though my mind.
“Dagen?” I shove past them to his side, not caring who I might piss off or the consequences of it.
I don’t miss the looks on their faces. I know that look. I’d seen it often as a child before I stopped telling people that I was being hunted.
So I ignore them and focus instead on him. “Dagen.”
I hear it then. Love. Peeking over at Lillian, I see she heard it too but I feel no embarrassment. Instead I close my eyes and focus on the tiny flame. The flame part terrifies me for a moment.
I study it, trying to understand it, not the love part but instead the flame. It burns hot and bright. Reminding me of my wings, of the angel fire. But it’s different somehow.
‘I love you. Thank you.’
“Thank you for what?” I want to scream at him, rail against the unfairness of it all.
‘For choosing me, Charlie.’ My heart is actually breaking.
The flame flares brighter. A gasp echoes in the room along with the sound of feet shuffling. I open my eyes and I see them all staring. The wings are back and are once again covered in flames.
“Oh my.” Caliel’s voice is filled with amazement and it forces me to look away from Dagen, to lock eyes with the angel. “I haven’t seen it in so long. Thousands of years.”
He isn’t talking to me or anyone else. “Not since Gabriel.” It is Luc that speaks now, and I look to him, he too is staring at the flames.
I don’t understand, he had seen them minutes ago. It takes me much longer than it should to realize the flames aren’t spreading like before.
“Why aren’t they spreading?” Torryn asks exactly what I had been thinking.
“These flames aren’t angel fire.” Caliel draws closer and I step back, trying to protect him, before his words sink in.
“What are they then?” I’m almost scared of the answer.
He looks at Lillian, eyes narrowing in thought.
“Gabriel was fierce, using angel fire to defeat many foes. But…” he pauses, his head tilting slightly to the side, “he also was merciful. As Lucifer knows, only Gabriel ever altered angel fire, turning it into both a weapon and a shield. These…” He reaches out a finger, and I freeze as he drags it along the edge of the wing and the flames.
A look of unmitigated ecstasy causes his face to go slack. I feel the urge to look away.
“Love, true love. Soul deep love created by Him.” Holy shit.
“You said shield?” I ask trying to get him to continue.
His hand drops as he blinks so slowly that I at first think he’s just closing his eyes, still riding whatever high the flames produced in him.
“It was rumored that he could use them to heal,” Lucifer answers for the angel.
“Heal.” I jerk my face back to Dagen. “How?” I demand.
They both are silent. “How?” I yell at them.
“I’m sorry, Charlie, I don’t know.” Luc looks at Caliel, who also shakes his head. “Gabriel never shared how he did it.”
Lillian moves to my side and trembles when the flames graze over her own wings as they flare slightly. I don’t know when they appeared.
“Charlie.” Her voice is soft and something about it reminds of the warmth of the sun. “I had to learn to trust my gifts.” Her eyes flick to Torryn, lust and hunger filling them, but under both those emotions is love like I’ve never seen. It practically shines out of her.
“Trust them?” I’m flabbergasted at the very suggestion. “Look what my ‘gift’ did.” I jerk my hand at Dagen. “It is killing him.” I choke on the words. “I’m killing him.” Fresh tears begin to fall.
‘Sweetheart.’ So much sadness in that word.
I shake my head, my heart pounding, and try to slow my breath. I fail. In seconds, I’m in the midst of a full blown panic attack. The room loses every molecule of oxygen.
Roaring in my ears and blackness in my vision blocks everything until finally Lucifer’s voice booms loud. “Charlie.” Just my name.
Glass shatters and winds rips through the room. My eyes open in surprise, but it does what he wanted it to - my panic slowly begins to recede.
Caliel is dusting shards of glass from his shirt, and Lillian is gaping at the King of Hell. Torryn is grinning like a loon.
I can breathe. I only realize it when I gulp in a huge breath. In that instant, I feel the heat and glance around. Once again, things are burning in the room. Fuck.
“Lillian’s are tied to her emotions.” Torryn is just a fount of knowledge. God, I’m such a bitch sometimes. I hate that I even thought it. He sees something on my face because he sobers as he continues. “I just meant that’s why the flames changed.”
He glances at his girl and she smiles as her hand rubs over his back. Shit, I feel even worse.
“Sorry,” I apologize and he nods. “I just… What if I hurt him or kill him? I’ve already almost done it.” I swallow hard, trying to remain calm.
I fail. I feel a hand on my neck and almost jerk away. Lucifer moves in front of me, squeezing between the bed and my body.
“I... We won’t let that happen.” His voice is low but steady. I want to argue and glance behind him at the man barely clinging to life. “We’re prepared now, Charlie. I promise.” Pausing, he looks at the others then back at me. “You might be the only one that can save him.”
‘You don’t have to do it, darlin.” I can hear how weak his song has grown and the tiredness in his voice.
I’m losing him. Losing my chance.
I don’t know how to save him or myself.
Chapter 24
DAGEN
I hate to leave her. I hate for her to blame herself more.
The prophecy didn’t say we had to be together for the Fallen to be defeated. Maybe our purpose, my brothers and I, is to unlock their powers for them to defeat the Fallen.
One night in her arms was like Heaven. I would prefer an eternity, but one night is more than I deserve.
I can feel all of their turmoil at not being able to save me, but hers is the greatest, except maybe Luc’s.
His helplessness is beating at me. Maybe for the first time, I understand his love for us. I wish, well, many things, but mostly that I had told him thanks for pulling me from the darkness, for giving me more time. Thank you for my moments with her.
I wish I could tell the others that finding your other half, even if for just a minuscule amount of time, is worth everything.
If I have one regret, it is not killing more Fallen. No that’s not true, my greatest regret is not saving my charges.
Leaving Charlie isn’t a regret because I know I gave her the greatest gift; she never has to run again. I’ve given her the power to protect herself from anything.
I focus my last strength, trying to reach for her, to comfort her. To let her know she hasn’t failed me or them. I think my finger twitches. I hear her sweet voice and my name on her lips lets me know she saw the subtle movement.
“Dagen.” It comes out a sigh, the saddest sound I think I’ve ever heard. It breaks my heart.
That heart stutters as I realize I love this woman. I didn’t plan to, not really, not like Torryn did with Lillian. That man was in love the moment he saw her, I think. No, I knew Charlie would be important to me, but this feeling that is spreading through me is like nothing I could imagine.
I feel weaker and yet strong.
“He’s crying,” I hear Torryn murmur and the anguish in those words.
He and I have always been closer than the others, maybe because we spent so much time together when we were first in Hell, maybe because even then I sensed his goodness and wanted to
protect him from the harshness of the others.
I know what I always believed; he was the most innocent of us. I have an instant of worry about how he will deal with this but then I hear Lillian. She will keep him whole.
Lucifer’s power vibrates, and I know it is because of his frustration. There are very few things not within his power, so he doesn’t deal with that well at all.
‘Tell him this is not his fault.’ Even to me, I sound weaker than just a moment ago.
“He wants you to know this isn’t your fault.” The words are barely understandable and the last is muffled.
That guy is getting more hugs in the last few months than he has in his entire existence. I can picture the stiffness and then slow melting as he realizes they aren’t letting go. I’d laugh if I could.
I know I only have a little time and I have to tell her. It’s not fair to do it then leave her but I can’t go without telling at all.
‘Charlie, I didn’t expect this. Not any of it, but I wouldn’t trade one second with you for another second on this Earth. I need you to know that.’ Pausing, I try to find my courage because, fuck, this scares me. Why, I don’t know. I’m going to be gone.
Just then, louder sobs reach my ears and then she lets me have it.
“Don’t you fucking dare!” She practically screams, and I hear the others gasp at her outburst and the sound of feet shuffling. I can picture her shoving Luc away and glaring down at my body. Damn, she is fucking perfect. “Damn you, Dagen, don’t. Please, you can’t do that to me.”
‘I love you, Charlie. I think I have since you kissed my neck and said I smelled like goddamn brownies.’
“No. Nope. You stop right now.” She sobs louder and all I can make out is no, over and over again.
I feel like an outsider in this group. I understand the anguish, although other than Grace, I’ve never felt true loss. Even during the war, Heaven’s powers dampened our reactions to the deaths of those we considered friends.
If I’m truly honest, I’m not sure I even had any actual friends. Even now, I can’t say that I do.