The pantry was dark, but light shone beneath the door, and in its pale glow, as his eyes adjusted, Elijah could make out Baz’s face. All of it, not hidden by sunglasses. Same as in the Tesla, except this time Elijah wasn’t buzzing on multiple substances. This time Baz stared nakedly back at him, all his guards down, all his veils aside.
“Please.” He caught Elijah’s hand, drew it to his lips. “Please.”
“Stop.” Elijah tried to pull his hand away, but Baz held it fast. They whispered, Giles’s and Aaron’s carefree chatter a strange background to their desperation. “Stop it. No.” Baz kissed his hand again, and Elijah thought he was going to cry. He set his teeth. “Stop it. You don’t even like me.”
In reply, Baz pressed Elijah’s hand to his mouth, but didn’t kiss it. Only held on to it as if it were the only thing anchoring him to earth.
Fuck.
When Elijah didn’t think it could get any worse, Baz spoke, a rough, ragged whisper tearing across his heart.
“I’ll help you. Get out of the work study. For the weekend or for good, whichever you prefer. I’ll help you find a way to feel you’re paying people back.” He shut his eyes, and weirdly, the gesture made him seem even more naked. Every crinkle, every line of tension shone like a beacon in the dark. “Please. Tell me what I have to do to get you to come along.”
Elijah felt heady and terrified. “I can’t take your weird moods. If you give me the cold shoulder while we’re having Baz and Elijah’s Excellent Adventure, I’m going to punch you in the face.”
Baz’s grin, framed by shadows, sent chills down Elijah’s spine. And perked up his dick. “There. Now you’re getting the hang of it.”
Elijah grabbed Baz by the ears, sighing as Baz’s hands moved over him. Smells of bacon and eggs and peppers drifted in from the kitchen, along with whispers of Giles and Aaron’s plans for the day.
He groaned as Baz dipped into his pants. Elijah thrust into his hand as Baz kissed his way along Elijah’s neck. “You’re so much fucking work. So. Much.”
“Come with me today. Let’s pack a bag and leave right now.”
“I can’t.” Elijah whimpered as Baz teased his crack.
“You can. I’ll help you. Say yes.”
God, he smelled so good. Elijah was ready to let Baz fuck him against the shelf while Aaron and Giles listened in. Shit. “Yes. Fine. Yes. We’ll go.”
Baz brushed a kiss on Elijah’s mouth. Elijah opened his eyes and got trapped in Baz’s gaze inches from his own.
The door to the pantry door opened wide, and light streamed in.
Baz’s back was to the kitchen, but Elijah yanked him down anyway, pressing those tender eyes into his shoulder. “Shut the fucking door,” he called out over Giles’s outburst of surprise.
The door shut. Elijah held Baz a moment longer, then let go.
Baz lifted his head again, and they regarded one another.
So naked, so fucking naked without those glasses. So young. So handsome.
So Baz.
Elijah let out a sigh of surrender.
Eyes crinkling and twinkling in the shadows, Baz smiled.
Clearly, Baz admitted as he shampooed his hair in the shower, this trip with Elijah was going to be a roller coaster. Because until Elijah had walked into the kitchen reeking of cigarettes and looking as if he expected Baz to tell him the plan was off—well, this had been exactly what Baz was going to say.
When he was alone, it all seemed so insane. He needed a herd around him to deflect his moodiness, and plenty of time to marinate in his own asshattery. A weekend with Elijah only, surrounded by the home-front chaos with Elijah expecting him to fold, was a recipe for disaster. By the time he got out of the shower, Baz didn’t think, he knew he should call it off. Wrapping a towel around his waist, he went to his room ready to get dressed, go downstairs and do what he had to do.
Elijah was there, surprisingly, pacing the length of Baz’s bed, looking ready to explode. “I can’t do this, I can’t go.”
“You can,” Baz replied, then dropped the towel and pushed Elijah onto the mattress.
Elijah had changed into jeans and a T-shirt, so when he got stiff, his cock ridged inside the narrow confines of snug denim instead of invitingly tenting his pajama pants. Baz dragged his own rapidly growing chub along it as he made love to Elijah’s neck. Elijah pushed weakly at him before sighing in surrender and shoving his fingers into Baz’s hair.
“You’re such a fucker.” Elijah gasped and moaned as Baz tongued his collarbone.
Baz thought about taking him up literally on the suggestion, but now that Elijah was in front of him, he was as determined to go as he had been not to five minutes earlier. Climbing off the bed, he pawed through his dresser, indexing what he wanted to wear and what he should pack.
Elijah sat up on the bed, hugging his knees to his chest. “How can you see? Are you Batman or something? It’s so dark.”
Baz had his red light on, so they were in full hellscape mode. He shrugged. “Used to it, I guess.”
“Can you see better this way than if you had regular light in here?”
“It’s not about better.” Baz tossed a pile of underwear and socks into his suitcase beside his jeans before switching to his closet for shirts. “My sight sucks no matter how you slice it. But it’s nice to lose the glasses at home.”
“The red lights are cool. Weird, a little creepy, but cool.” Elijah’s voice had a tremulous quality, like he was trying not to be nervous and failing.
“My dad’s sister thought it up. She’s an engineer. Came here and rigged several rooms.” After tucking a wad of T-shirts and a hoodie into the last space in the bag, Baz dragged his travel toiletry and light kits out. He opened it beside Elijah on the bed, checking fluid levels on the shampoo and contact lens cleaner, indexing the supplies he’d need from his bathroom.
“What’s all this electrical stuff? And the tape, and clips?”
Baz blinked at his kit, imagining how it must look to someone who didn’t know what it was. “A portable red lamp. My aunt made it. There are extra bulbs in there too, so I can swap out ones in a hotel room. The tape and clips are for keeping curtains shut and light switches stationary if need be.”
“Damn. That’s…organized.”
“Gotta be.”
“I seriously would never have pegged you for being this anal retentive,” Elijah remarked as Baz finally zipped up the last case and stacked them into the neat triple nesting set which turned the bags into a single unit.
“Choir tour. Had to get good at living off a little and packing up fast.”
Longing flickered briefly on Elijah’s face. “You guys go all over, stay in people’s houses, right?”
“Sometimes.” Baz hoisted the suitcase as he slipped sunglasses on and nodded at the door. “You ready?”
Elijah didn’t look ready, but he followed Baz down the stairs all the same.
Mina, Aaron and Giles sat in the living room half-watching The Big Bang Theory with the remains of their breakfast littered around them. Aaron had his head in Giles’s lap, but he focused on Mina, smiling as she waved her hands in punctuation to a story featuring a high amount of outrage. She wound to a pause as Elijah and Baz approached.
Elijah hunched his shoulders and looked like he wanted a fifth and a cigarette. Mina, Aaron and Giles took on a remix of concerned expressions.
Baz leapt into the breach. “So. We’re gonna take off.”
Mina’s and Giles’s eyebrows went up, but Aaron zeroed in on Elijah. “Where are you going?”
Baz rubbed his neck. “Thing came up, and I have to go home for the weekend. I need a driver and a date for a gig, and Elijah volunteered.”
Elijah moved his gaze to the ceiling and said nothing as the rest of them exploded into various objections and expressions of disbelief.
Baz slipped into full Acker charm offensive, complete with comforting smile, hand gestures and I got this body language. “It’s no big. A weekend fundraiser thing, in and out.” He shifted his bag on his shoulder and nodded at the door. “We’re gonna go over to Pastor Schulz’s place, get Elijah packed up and head out from there. If anything goes wrong with the house, call the management number over the phone.”
“But what about your job?” Giles said this to Elijah.
Elijah had red splotches on his cheeks. He looked ready to bolt or attack but couldn’t decide which. “I don’t… I need to go talk to the manager.” He aimed a sharp glance at Baz. “And if it doesn’t work out—”
“It’ll work out.” Baz could hear the threat in there, that Elijah would stay if the manager was so much as mildly disappointed. So not happening. If Baz had to call his mom and beg her to send an intern to fill the space, he would.
Giles seemed bewildered mostly, and while Aaron studied Baz carefully, in the end he must have decided he liked what he saw, because he only hugged them both and told them to keep in touch. Mina, though, was some work. “How long will you be gone? Where are you staying?”
“Long weekend, essentially. Staying at our Barrington Hills place because the fundraiser is at some country-estate thing by Mirror Lake.”
He would have fielded her inquisition all day long, but she was wily, Ms. Mina. She turned to Elijah and said, “Can I see you outside for a minute?”
“I’ll put my stuff in the frunk and meet you at the Tesla.” Baz managed to pull off breezy, but in reality he was pretty damn panicked.
Aaron followed him to the garage. “Baz, what’s going on?”
“Mom’s having a fundraiser. Gotta represent.” He popped the frunk, stowed his bag, unplugged the Tesla.
“Yes, but with Elijah?”
“You did point out we were a good match.”
Aaron studied Baz a moment, then shook his head. “Be careful, okay?”
Baz tossed him a salute. “Will do.”
Aaron left, but Elijah didn’t reappear, so Baz did some more housekeeping. He phoned Stephan and let him know the vague game plan for departure, promising to keep him abreast as the adventure unfurled. He warned him, too, about the possible need for massaging of Elijah’s employer. Stephan told him to consider the matter resolved.
One call down. Baz hovered over his top contacts, thumb wavering until at last he selected Marius and waited for the phone to ring.
“Hey there.” Marius’s voice rumbled in Baz’s ear. “What’s up?”
“Wanted to let you know I’ll be out of town for a bit. Hitting the home front for the weekend.”
“You’re going to Chicago? Why?”
“Fundraiser thing of Mom’s. She tried to set me up, but I told her I’d bring my own date.” He let a beat pass, then finished it off. “Taking Elijah.”
Marius said nothing at first, but eventually sighed. “Shit.”
It would have been easier if he’d yelled. The silence weighed on Baz, and he felt compelled to fill it. “Don’t make a mountain out of it. It’s all for show.” Except of course he’d led his mother to believe he actually did have a boyfriend.
“You know I would have gone with you. Even faked being your date.”
“You have shit to do. Med-school prep.”
“Do you think taking Elijah to Chicago is a good idea?”
Probably not. “Absolutely. Talk about somebody who could use an airing.”
“Baz, don’t fuck with his head. I’m serious. It’s one thing to let your hair down with him at a wedding, but Elijah doesn’t need your bullshit.”
Baz exhaled and ran a hand through his hair.
“I’m not saying you can’t go.” Marius’s tone gentled. “I’m saying keep your head in the game. The one with hair.”
Baz had wandered into the drive, but he peered around the corner of the house to make sure Elijah and Mina weren’t coming his way. “I don’t mean to fuck with him. I’m not that big of a dick.”
“You’re not a dick at all. But your moods can be rough to weather. Plus you get pissy when you bump up against a limitation when you’re trying to impress somebody. Look—I can get away for a bit. Why don’t the three of us go?”
“No. You can’t actually get away, and you know it. And—” He stopped, realizing the truth of what he was about to say. Huh. “I won’t be a jerk. If I need to queen out, I’ll call you. I won’t take it out on him.”
“Damien’s gonna shit a brick.”
“Yeah, well, he’s good at that. Pass the news on to him, please.” Baz spied Elijah coming around the front of the house, and his heart kicked into his throat. “Hey. I gotta go. I’ll keep you informed.”
“You’d damn well better.”
Tucking his phone into his pocket, Baz faced Elijah. He did his best to play it cool, to act as if nothing mattered, but this fucking mattered. He wanted to demand to know if Mina had talked him out of it, to know what she’d said so he could undo it, but he bit his tongue and waited. Trying not to hold his breath. Trying not to admit it felt like everything in the world hinged on whatever the hell Elijah said next.
Elijah didn’t say a damn thing. He stared at Baz as if he didn’t trust him farther than he could throw him. Even from ten feet away, the sooty, lingering gaggy smell of cigarette smoke hung in the air.
With a sigh, Elijah held up a cord. “You forgot your phone charger.”
Baz accepted it carefully. “You ready to go?” Say yes. Come on. Say you’ll go.
Elijah shoved his hands in his pockets. “I have to talk to Pastor first. But if he says it’s okay, then…yes.”
Baz grinned, feeling like he’d saddled a mythical beast. “Awesome.” Because he knew he could get Schulz to say yes.
Elijah would have figured he’d drive to Pastor and Liz’s house in a daze of half disbelief, half hysteria over what he was about to do, but the Tesla’s regenerative braking kept wigging him out. It was supposed to be some energy-saving thing, but all Elijah knew was every time he took his foot off the gas, the car started slowing down before he pressed the brake. When Elijah’s foot did depress the pedal, the car jerked to an abrupt near-halt.
“Sorry,” he said for the umpteenth time.
Baz waved this objection away as he had all the others. He lounged in the passenger seat with his long body splayed through all available space. “Marius still takes a minute to figure it out whenever he drives.”
Elijah was taking far longer than a minute. Part of his problem was he’d never driven anything even a third as cool as this car. Not a brand-new car. Not a nearly new car. Never a fucking Tesla. What if he wrecked it?
How the hell was he supposed to make it all the way to Chicago without wrecking it?
When he pulled into the Schulzes’ drive, he let out a sigh of relief. It was short-lived, however, as he fumbled for a means to turn off the car.
“It’ll shut itself off once we leave with the keys.” Baz cracked his door and climbed out. “Come on.”
Despite Baz’s assurances, Elijah still lingered at the Tesla. It was weird to not turn off the car.
He was distracted from his conundrum when the door to the house opened. “Elijah—oh, and Baz too!” Liz pulled Baz into a hug Elijah knew from experience would smell like vanilla and feel the way a fresh-baked cookie tasted. She bussed one cheek and playfully slapped the other when she was finished. “Come on in, both of you. You have perfect timing. I just took sugar cookies out of the oven.”
Liz, as Elijah’s expanding waistline bore witness, ran a bakery out of her kitchen. She had a license or whatever official thing she needed to sell her baked goods at the campus coffee shop, several Campustown establishments and a few boutiques in Saint Paul. The markup was steep, but everybody paid because they knew one hundred percent of the profits went to anti
-trafficking charities. Theoretically the costs for supplies were taken out of the total before it was passed on, but Elijah knew the truth. More often than not Liz paid for things herself.
In addition to the promised sugar cookies, she had Rice Krispies bars laced with caramel sauce and chocolate chips, and mint brownies. Liz ushered them into places at the table, plunked milk and cookies in front of them, and continued to bustle about the room as she spoke. “I’m in a flurry because tomorrow I have to go to Viv’s place and help her with the gluten free items. You have to have a special kitchen for them because of contamination. She was willing to get the license, though, so now we have more options. But that means I have to bake double today.”
Elijah opened his mouth to offer his help, which he’d given before, then remembered he was supposed to tell her he was leaving. Oh, and could someone tell food service he was bailing? He cut a gaze to Baz, his change of heart probably written all over his face.
Before he could get over his queasiness, let alone move on to calling things off for real this time, Baz spoke. “You know, you should get an intern. Someone not only to help with the baking, but the distribution and marketing. They’d get to put it on their resume, and you’d get extra hands.”
“I can help her.” Elijah glared at Baz. “I help her a lot, actually. I can help right now.”
He got up to wash his hands and put on an apron, but Liz pushed him into his chair. “As if I’d let you interrupt your visit. Though the internship is a fine idea.” She pulled a tray of cookies out of the oven and put in a waiting pan of brownies. “What are you two up to today? I hope, Sebastian, you’re taking Elijah out to have some fun.”
“How funny you should ask.” Baz draped an arm over Elijah’s shoulders. “I’m trying to convince him to go on a weekend getaway with me.”
“Why, how wonderful.” Liz tossed her potholder on the counter and plunked across from them at the table. Her eyes danced with gentle Liz mischief. “Where are you going?”
“I’m not sure I should go.” Elijah shrugged out from under Baz’s arm.
This put Baz’s hand on his back, and said hand immediately trailed to Elijah’s hip. “Mom’s having a fundraiser and asked I come with a date. Everyone else is too busy to come.”
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