With reluctance, Aviva pushed thoughts of Jacob aside and made the calls. She continued calling most of the day with a short break for lunch. By the time of the client meeting, she’d whittled the list of people they hadn’t yet heard from and printed the latest numbers.
As they sat with Russell and finalized the menu, Meryl turned to her. “You’re coming to the gala, right? And you’re bringing your boyfriend?”
Aviva’s face heated. Meryl and Russell looked at her, waiting for an answer. It wasn’t her attendance, but Jacob’s, that made her nervous. “Yes, we’ll be there.”
“Good,” Russell said. “I’m looking forward to meeting him. You said he’s a law student?”
“He’s studying for the Bar exam right now. I can’t wait for it to be over so we can actually see each other. Texting and calling gets old.”
Russell laughed. “My son is a lawyer. I know the feeling. Luckily, he works for a small law firm, so we get to see him. His hours are long but manageable. Those big law firms? Whew, they’re at their desks until two or three in the morning, then again at ten. Not a lifestyle I can understand.”
Aviva nodded as a pit formed in her stomach.
An hour later, they’d finished their meeting. Aviva took a short break to text Jacob.
—so, ur coming to the gala with me, right?—
—of course. can’t wait!—
—really?—
—yeah never made out in a science center before. haven’t been since I was 8—
—funny guy. luv u—
—luv u too—
She put her phone away and smiled out the window. Come to think of it, she’d never made out there, either.
****
Jacob stared at the computer screen. He was supposed to study, but the words smudged into each other and created a pale color wash across the screen. Instead, his brain churned trying to decide what to do about Croft. He’d received a follow-up email from Stuart yesterday.
The email was friendly, as was the guy. He wanted to know how finals went, how studying was going, and lastly, if he’d given any more thought to their proposal.
Most days, Jacob’s brain barely had room for breathing and Aviva, but somehow, in the way back, he’d kept Croft there. He noodled on the proposal in out-of-the-way places and during odd quiet times, like in the shower or on his way to the library. So yes, he’d given more thought to the proposal. The problem was, he didn’t have an answer.
Stuart showed him something he hadn’t considered before. The boutique agency tickled his fancy in unexpected ways. He’d be able to learn a lot, be involved in everything, and immerse himself in substantial projects. It appealed to him. However, his dream had always been to be a high-powered lawyer. He loved the excitement and the power. He wasn’t power hungry, at least not exclusively. But there was something appealing in it. He’d never been able to lose that desire.
With a sigh, he grabbed his phone and stalked out of the library. Outside, the muggy air did little to refresh him, but he inhaled anyway in an attempt to clear the cobwebs. Jabbing the buttons on the phone screen, he waited for Stuart to pick up. It went straight to voice mail.
“Hi Stuart, it’s Jacob Black. Got your email. Listen, I’m sorry I haven’t answered. Studying has been crazy. Give me a call when you have some time. Thanks.”
They needed to talk. He didn’t want to leave it to voicemail. Feeling a little more grounded about his decision, he returned to the library and settled in for another long day of studying.
When his phone rang, he was taking a lunch break. He answered and walked outside.
“Jacob, Stuart Rose here. Am I getting you at a bad time?”
“Not at all. Thanks for calling back.”
“It’s good to hear from you. I imagine studying keeps you pretty busy.”
Jacob laughed. “You could say that.”
“Just remember, it’ll be over soon.”
“That’s what I tell myself every day.”
“Good. So, have you come to a decision?”
Jacob took a deep breath. “I think I have.”
“And?”
“And I appreciate the offer, but I have to pass. Smith Kane has been my dream since I first decided to go to law school and—”
“—you shouldn’t have to lose out on your dream, Jacob. I get it. Can’t say I’m not disappointed, but I’d hate for you to work for us and always wonder what might have been.”
“Thank you. You don’t know how much your understanding means to me.”
“Well, I wish you the best of luck. Keep in touch.”
“Will do. Thank you. And thank your associates as well.”
“Take care.”
As Jacob hung up, a little frisson of doubt traveled up his spine. He’d stuck to his plan and was following his dream. It wasn’t a mistake. It wasn’t.
****
When the buzzing intercom announced Jacob’s arrival, Aviva practically skipped to the doorway in anticipation. The elevator binged, the doors swooshed, and his lean form appeared silhouetted in the shadows.
“Hey there.” He leaned down and kissed her.
She melted into him. His hands grasped her waist and caressed her back. He tasted good—his lips a little salty. She opened her mouth to encourage him. He spread his legs and pulled her tight to him as his tongue plundered her mouth. Every muscle and bone pressed against her. She moaned. She wanted—needed—to get closer. She sucked on him, raised her hands to run them through his hair. Closing her eyes, she inhaled his scent—spicy, male and all him. Too soon, he grabbed her waist and pulled her away from him.
Her vision took a moment to focus. Her breathing was heavy as she came around. “What?”
“Not here,” he panted.
Her gaze zeroed in on his mouth. She reached for his hand. Pulling him into her apartment, she shut the door with her foot and turned into his arms. He kissed her again and dragged his mouth away from her.
“Roommates?”
“Gone.”
He lifted her up and hauled her along his body. The friction was pure torture. She wrapped her legs around his waist, her arms around his neck and opened her mouth to him once more. Supporting her bottom with his hands, he carried her to the bedroom, dropping her on the bed. She pulled her shirt off. His pupils dilated as he reached for his. With a wicked grin, she yanked the ends of the shirt out of his hands and pulled it over his head. His torso—hard pecs, flat stomach—was warm to the touch. His breath stuttered as she ran her hands over him. He pulled her into a kneeling position on the bed. Their bodies met, skin against skin. His hands reached around to unhook her bra. He paused, an unspoken question hanging between them. Nodding, she let him undress her.
Her body heated under the intensity of his gaze, but she remained where she was on the bed. He backed up a step. She could practically feel his gaze rove over every inch of her.
“You’re beautiful,” he whispered. He drew her close.
She sighed and buried her face into his neck. His fingers trailed down her back, around her hips and beneath the waistband of her shorts. She shivered. He repeated the action until she shifted. Her restless movements made him harden. She pressed her pelvis into him. His breath hitched. Trailing her fingers to his waistband, she joined him in their frenzy to remove the rest of their clothing. They squirmed out of their pants. He fumbled in his pocket before letting his shorts drop to the floor. The crinkling of foil pulled her up short as he held a condom in his hands.
“I hope you don’t mind—”
“You brought—”
They spoke at the same time and halted together, a sheepish smile on his face.
“No, I don’t mind,” she said. “I’m glad.”
She shimmied out of her panties. The condom dropped onto the bed. She picked it up, unwrapped it, and sheathed him. His breathing became choppy and he leaned in for a kiss. She pulled away, teasing him, biting her lip. Wide-eyed, he followed her every move. Slipping off the bed, she pus
hed against hard muscles and straddled his hips. He bucked, but she smoothed her hands over his pelvic bones. This was her time.
Leaning over, she trailed kisses from his forehead, down the bridge of his nose, over his chin, and across his throat. His adam’s apple bobbed as her lips left a wet trail on his skin.
“Aviva,” he whispered, but she covered his lips with her finger. He sucked it into his mouth and drew it in and out, mimicking what their bodies would soon do together.
A heaviness pooled in the pit of her stomach. She let him draw her finger deeper. After a moment, she raked her fingers across his chest to his stomach. He bucked. This time, Aviva followed, rubbing against him.
Growling, he grabbed her waist. “I have to have you, now!”
He flipped them over so he was on top. His eyes were almost black with desire. Now it was she who strained. A wicked grin crossed his face. He touched and teased her, using his fingers to make her need build.
When she could stand it no more, she whispered, “Please.”
Lowering himself, he penetrated slowly, letting her body adjust. His weight was a relief. As they moved together, their bodies became one. They rocked, tension building as they reached higher and higher for climax. Pressure built. Her breathing increased in time to his. He plunged deeper and faster. She closed her eyes and arched her back. Wave after wave of climax rolled through her. Light burst behind her eyelids and pulsating sounds filled her ears. Moments later, Jacob roared her name as he joined her over the edge.
She floated down and lay spent, him draped on top of her, their breathing slowing together. His fingers fiddled with her hair. She stroked his back as she became more aware of her surroundings. Together, they drifted off to sleep.
When she opened her eyes, he laid next to her, watching her, a small smile on his face.
“I love you,” he said.
“I love you, too.”
“I’ve wanted to do this for a long time.” He brushed her hair out of her face, traced her jawline with his finger. “You’re beautiful.”
Her face heated and Jacob laughed at her. She stuck out her tongue at him and joined in. Cuddling against him, she rested, listening to the beat of his heart.
“I spoke to Stuart today.”
She smiled when she realized whom he was talking about. “Did you accept the job?” A position there would be perfect. He’d work hard and probably have long hours, but there would still be time for the two of them. They could find a way to balance things. She felt him sigh before he spoke.
“No, I thanked him for the offer, but I want to try Smith Kane. I’ve always wanted to do this. I need to see what happens.”
What about them? How would they survive? They barely saw each other now. The only way she handled it was because it was short-term. Long term? She closed her eyes as her heartbeat raced. She’d lived the same life with her dad. She knew how it went. She didn’t want any part of it.
Except, she couldn’t bear to leave Jacob. She loved him. She needed him. He was different from her dad. She needed to try to trust him, even if deep down she didn’t know how it was possible.
She tried to stifle her disappointment. This had always been a possibility. Smith Kane was his dream. Who was she to get in the way of it? “You should follow your dream.” Even though it’s my nightmare.
“You’re not mad?”
Terribly disappointed. “No, I’m not mad. It’s your decision to make.”
He gazed into her eyes. “I will make time for us. I promise.” He kissed the tip of her nose, and she tried to stifle the doubt that struggled to reach the surface.
Chapter Twenty-One
The blare of an alarm penetrated Jacob’s dreams. He reached his arm across his bedside table, shut it off, grabbed his phone, and held it to his bleary eyes. Some of his fatigue lessened when he saw the text from Aviva.
—good luck today!—
With a smile, he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. At seven in the morning, traffic rolled beneath his window. Horns honked and trucks rumbled. For most people, it was a regular day. For him, it was the start of his professional life. It would determine his future. He tried to shake off the nerves that twisted around him, clenched his stomach, and squeezed his head. Nerves were useless. They wouldn’t help him ace the exam; they would only make him doubt himself.
He showered, ate breakfast, and headed to the test site at the Jacob Javits Convention Center. After registering, he waited until it was time to begin, his nerves buzzing like an electric wire.
Three hours and fifteen minutes later, the doors opened. He followed the other test takers out of the exam room for a lunch break. He was exhausted. His mind hummed with all the possible answers flitting through his brain. He continued to analyze the essay questions, turned over his responses, and wondered if there was anything he could have done differently. A bump on the shoulder brought him out of his reverie.
“Sorry,” said another student, who continued down the hall.
With a shake of his head, Jacob made his way to the cafeteria, bought his lunch, and found an empty table. He pulled out his phone. “Hey, Avs, it’s me.”
“Hey, how’s the exam?”
“Uch, about like I expected, but exhausting. I still have the afternoon session to sit through, and again tomorrow.”
“And then you’re finished. You can do this. I know you can.”
“Thanks. I needed to hear your voice.”
“Are you at lunch?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, eat. I can talk while you chew.”
He laughed. Some of his tension escaped. He listened to her chatter about the last-minute preparations for the gala, a funny story about Hannah, a complaint about Meryl. By the time he’d finished his sandwich, he was much calmer. “Thanks for talking me through.”
“Feel better now?”
“Much.”
“Good, now go ace your test.”
He cleaned his spot and returned to the test room. Three hours later, he finished with day one. He texted Aviva.
—day 1 done. barely see straight. going home. luv u—
—so proud of you. 1 day left. sleep. luv u too—
The next day was a repeat of the one before. By the end of the day, Jacob was wiped. He staggered out of the exam and almost missed Aviva, who stood by the side of the building waiting.
“Hey.” She took him in her arms.
He leaned into her, soaking in the feel of her. Burying his face in her hair, he inhaled her floral scent. He tried to let the stress of the day evaporate.
After a moment, he pulled away. “What are you doing here?”
“I thought I’d meet you when you were finished.” His exhaustion must have shown on his face, because she cupped his chin and stroked his cheek. “Don’t worry. I know you’re beat. I’ll just see you home and leave you to relax.”
He took her hand as they turned toward the corner. “You’re amazing, you know.”
She swung their arms in time to their steps. “Do you want to walk or ride?”
“I need to stretch, so let’s walk.”
They walked without saying much. Her grip in his was firm, her skin soft. New York City at the end of July was like walking into a wet sponge—high humidity, high heat, little air movement. The Jacob Javits Convention Center was out of the way of most commuters and tourists, so the sidewalks were filled with other law students. Jacob was reassured to see everyone looked as exhausted as he felt. By the time they made it to Penn Station, he was done.
“Do you mind if we get a cab?”
“Of course not. Would you rather take the PATH?”
“Not in this heat.” After waiting in the cab line, he held the door for her. When he climbed in, he gave the driver his address. “I’ll have him drop you off as well.”
She rested a hand on his arm. “Wait. Let me see you settled first, then I’ll go to my apartment.”
He shook his head. “That’s not necessary.”
�
��You’re barely functional. Let me make sure you get home okay. I promise I won’t stay long.”
As he leaned against the headrest, he muttered, “I don’t want you to think I’m trying to get rid of you.”
“Don’t worry. I know. Now rest.”
He closed his eyes. He should make sure she was okay in a cab. She was still recovering… What seemed like a moment later, she shook him. “Wake up,” she whispered. “We’re here.”
He fumbled in his pocket for his wallet.
“Shh, I’ve got it,” she said.
He wanted to protest, but he was so damned tired. He stumbled out of the cab. “Do you want to get dinner?”
She laughed as she reached for his arm. “You’re swaying on your feet. Come on. You need to go to bed.”
As they made their way to his apartment, he tried to string words together to make a sentence. “Was the ride okay for you? I’m sorry I fell asleep.”
She took his keys out of his hand and opened the door. “It was fine. You want to lay on the sofa or your bed?”
“Are you offering?” He wiggled his eyebrows.
She laughed. “I prefer sex when my boyfriend remembers who he’s having it with, thanks. Or is even aware he’s having it.”
“Ouch.” He collapsed on the bed. “At least come lay with me. I’ll be fine in a minute.”
“Mm hmm. Sure.” But she lay next to him. Jacob let out a deep breath.
Her hands stroked his forehead. He closed his eyes. He couldn’t have kept them open with toothpicks. His body felt weighted, his limbs heavy. He wanted to thank her, to tell her he would be fine, to say he loved her. He opened his mouth, but his tongue wouldn’t form the words. He’d take a little nap, after which he’d talk to her, reassure her, tell her he…
****
Aviva watched him sleep. She should leave, let him rest undisturbed. She’d told him she would. Of course, he hadn’t expected to fall asleep. He probably didn’t hear half of what she said.
He’d fallen asleep a half hour ago. She’d like to think it was because her hands stroked his face, but the truth was he’d probably have fallen asleep standing up. It was a little scary how tired he was. The Jacob she knew was always on, always prepared. He always looked out for her. This Jacob was an anathema.
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