How easy would it be to just lean in? She knew how he felt—that he didn’t care for her at all. But right now, with her body curled into his, with the warmth shooting through her core, she could hardly think straight.
“Tell me what you saw?”
Her pulse raced, and she tried to clear her head. “I saw myself dead. On the dirt of the Lacus Mortis, I think. A burning room. A woman with red hair and an old man. It was like a part of me wanted to remember, but another part of me forbade it. But mostly. I saw the void. And I wanted to jump in.”
She was warm now, and sweat beaded on her face. She licked her upper lip, tasting the salt.
Bael’s keen gaze seemed to take in the movement, his fingers tightening on her waist nearly imperceptibly. She didn’t need him to keep drawing the magic out. So why am I not telling him to stop?
His eyes lowered to where his hand pressed between her breasts, and he sucked in a deep breath. “I don’t know why or how you pulled that much power at once, or why you’re so drawn to the void. We need to find a way for your body to handle shadow magic without becoming overwhelmed. I’ve always done that by remembering my life. My early life. We’ll have to find another way for you.”
What were Bael’s memories, the ones he rolled over in his mind when the void beckoned? Suddenly, she had a burning desire to know everything about him. She glanced at the black cord around his neck, and she tugged it from his shirt. A thin silver ring—the female twin of the one in her pocket, hung from the end of the cord.
Bael’s hands flew to her fingers, tightening around them.
Oops.
She heard his sharp intake of breath, then he pushed the ring back under his collar.
Swallowing hard, she rose. What the hell am I doing? “Sorry. I really don’t know why I did that.”
“It’s fine.”
He released her fingers, and she dropped her hand. “I saw one more thing.”
“What?”
“You. Shoving a blade into my heart at the arena.”
A muscle tensed in his jaw, and his expression darkened. “I think that’s enough for today. Get some rest.”
Shadows gathered around him, and her skin grew positively frigid once more.
Chapter 35
Ursula stood by the window. In the distance, the sunlight glinted off of Asta’s spire. Despite the pearly rays of sunlight, dark thoughts clouded her mind.
Sitting on the onyx throne, she'd completely lost control, flooded by shadow magic. She'd seen horrifying glimpses of her past, little fragments that lacerated her with horror. And perhaps, she’d seen a glimpse of her future.
Unable to warm herself, she pulled a blanket around her shoulders. Something about her disjointed memories filled her with a deep chill.
Bael had said she'd probably blocked her own memories to forget the horrible things she’d done. And the closer she got to remembering her past, the more she feared he was right. Whenever she thought of the burning room—the red-haired woman, the words kill the king—guilt pressed on her ribs like a hundred rocks.
Somewhere, deep under the fog of her forgotten memories, lurked a wild animal.
And if she didn’t want to succumb to Bael’s blade, maybe it was time for her to unleash the beast. After all, if she couldn't even kill a moth, how could she drive a weapon into Bael?
The odds against her were hard enough without hesitation. If she faltered, she’d be dead. Jaw slackened, red hair stamped into the dirt. The void had been trying to tell her something.
Throwing her cloak around her shoulders, she ran out the door into the sunlight. She hurried over the bridge into the atrium, where the lion’s mosaic seemed to leer at her from the floor. She pulled the lever in the wall. After a moment, the lift clanked down in the middle of the room. She stepped inside the iron lift, trying to clear her mind. The elevator creaked upward past the manor’s empty floors.
On the roof, the lunar wind nipped at her through the wool of her cloak, and she stepped out onto the marble. Shielding the sun from her eyes, she whistled for Sotz. It took only a few moments for his shadow to pass overhead, and he glided to a landing on the roof’s edge.
Carefully, she climbed onto his back, gripping his fur. She squeezed her thighs, sending him soaring over the roof’s edge. The wind whipped over her skin, pure and clean. As she leaned into Sotz, she asked, “Want to hunt?”
Immediately, Sotz swooped toward Asta, beating his wings harder. As they soared for the writhing cloud of moths, the sound of beating wings filled the air. A deep humming that vibrated her very core.
When they reached the cloud, the moths parted, fluttering around them, just out of reach. In the cocoon of moths, the sunlight dimmed, like they were walking in a deep forest.
Just as Sotz arced around the spire, an enormous moth shot in front of them—gray wings with faint purple spots. Sotz dove for it, and Ursula gripped tighter. Time to unleash the beast.
As Sotz neared, the moth folded its wings and dove. Sotz pursued, his wings pumping. Like a meteorite, they hurtled for the lunar floor, wind racing over her skin. Her pulse raced, a dark thrill rippling through her.
The moth burst out of the cloud, fleeing for his life. Ursula pressed herself tight against Sotz’s back. The moth twisted and spun, but inch by inch, they gained on it. The ground neared, and Ursula started to direct Sotz out of the dive, but the moth was only a few feet from his nose. With a final burst of speed, he hammered his wings, snatching it from the air. Only a few hundred feet above the ground, she tugged Sotz’s fur to pull him up again before they smashed into the lunar floor.
Sotz chewed happily on the moth as they carved a slow circle around the base of the spire. Now, she could feel the night magic emanating from the tower. It washed over her skin in waves, but it didn’t seem to chill her as it had before. Her heart raced with the thrill of the hunt, her body energized.
After she caught her breath, they climbed back into the cloud. Sotz beat his wings, taking her higher and higher, above Asta’s spire. He raced upward, until they nearly reached the edge of the magical dome.
The moths thinned, and the crater spread out before them—a great caldera, full of Nyxobas’s brethren. And beyond, more craters, ancient lava fields. A great expanse of barren land.
Ursula shivered. Suddenly Sotz tensed. A flicker of movement above caught her eye. Her gaze landed on the great white bat. The Gray Ghost’s steed.
“Can you follow it?” Ursula asked.
Sotz beat his wings, rising higher behind the albino bat. The creature flew with powerful beats of its wings and they raced to keep up with it. It moved swift as the night wind, its downy fur stark against the dark sky. They winged upward, skimming the edge of the dome.
But when the bat reached the shimmer of shadow magic, it simply passing into the shadow beyond.
Ursula swallowed hard. How can it fly in a vacuum, with no air?
Ursula directed Sotz right up to the edge, until the magic shimmered only inches from the tips of his outstretched wings.
She peered into the darkness beyond. The bat was gone.
Chapter 36
Ursula arrived a few minutes late for their second magic training session, and she hurried across the stone floor. This time, she’d worn a soft velvet cape to keep her warm. As before, Bael sat in his onyx throne, cloaked in shadows. Bael gazed down at her, his pale eyes piercing the shadows. “You’re late. Take off the cloak.”
“Why?”
“I need to see how your body uses the magic.”
She swallowed hard, untying the cape and letting it fall to the floor. She wore another of Cera’s creations—a purple silk gown, with slits cut all the way up to her thighs.
She cocked her head. “Would you like me completely naked, or is this good enough?”
A low growl rose from his throat, and for just a moment, his eyes darkened before returning to gray. “That will be fine. We’ll start with you standing there. I’m going to let the shadow magic wash ove
r you once again. See if you can root your body to the ground. Use the basalt at your feet as an anchor. Feel it beneath your toes, and let the night magic inch slowly up your legs, up to your hips, and don’t let it fill your chest until you’re in control.”
She nodded. She wasn’t entirely sure she knew what he was talking about, but she’d give it a shot.
“Close your eyes,” he said.
She did as instructed, and in the next moment, she felt a wave of powerful night magic wash over her, spilling through her body like ink. An image rose like the flames—the old man, his wrinkled hands handing her an athame. Bael, pressing a knife into her heart.
The wall of blackness slammed into her, knocking the life from her chest. Darkness threatened to consume her from the inside out.
“Ursula!” Bael called to her.
Shivering, she opened her eyes. Bael had pulled her into his lap, wrapping his arms around her. His warmth enveloped her, and she could feel his heart beating hard against her body. Once again, he pressed his hand between her breasts, drawing out some of the magic.
“That didn’t go well,” she said through chattering teeth.
He shook his head. “You let it happen too quickly. The magic completely overtook you, like it was drawn to you. Whatever you are, Ursula, the darkness wants you.”
“Aren’t I the lucky girl?”
“I’m going to try it one more time, allowing through only the smallest amount of magic. I’m going to see if I can help your body control it.”
As his body warmed hers, her pulse began to speed up.
“I could see your muscles tensing when you stood there, like you were scared of it. Maybe if you don’t resist so much, you’ll have greater control. Are you ready?” His breath warmed the shell of her ear.
She nodded, straightening.
Bael allowed the tiniest wisps of magic to curl from him. With his arm wrapped around her back, his fingers rested on the hollows of her hip. Her back arched.
A soft, electrical buzz kissed her ankles, moving up her leg. A delicious vibration—cold, but thrilling at the same time.
“Where do you feel it?” he asked.
Without realizing what she was doing, her legs parted slightly. Her bare skin peaked out of the slit in her dress. “It’s moving up my legs.”
“Good.” Bael’s hand hovered just over her leg, not touching her, but guiding the magic. Under her dress, the magic caressed her bare skin.
“Let the magic move slowly,” he said. “Take control of it.”
As his hand moved in the air above her legs, silky shadows worked higher up her thigh, and she felt her knees falling away just a little more.
She turned to him, her eyes on his perfect lips. Gods, she wanted to press her mouth against his.
His thrilling magic had moved all the way up her inner thigh, and her breath came fast. If he keeps going, I will lose my mind. If he doesn’t keep going, I will also lose my mind. She was supposed to be focused on the magic, but all she could think of was that hand hovering just over her thighs. How she wanted him to touch her skin, to slide those powerful fingers under her silky underwear. Her breath hitched.
“Do you have control?” he asked.
“Not even close,” she breathed, her chest flushing. What the hell is wrong with me?
His gaze met hers, and he leaned in, his mouth just inches from hers.
In the next instant, his muscles tensed. “I’m sorry,” he said.
Ursula’s jaw dropped. She couldn’t quite remember how to put a sentence together. “It’s fine.” Her cheeks burned. What just happened? She wasn’t entirely clear why he’d apologized.
A look of confusion—one she’d never seen on Bael’s face before—had overtaken his features. “This isn’t working. Maybe me acting as a conduit is interfering with your ability to feel the magic. Maybe you should try it on your own. If I see you losing control again, I’ll stop it.”
She nodded. “Of course. I think I’m ready. That all...totally made sense,” she blustered.
She jumped off the throne, mortified that her flushed chest gave her away. Stupid pale skin.
Bael rose, walking down the steps. “The second I see you losing control, I’ll pull you off.”
She nodded, still lost in a daze, then sat in the throne.
As soon as she sat, cold magic thrummed over her legs. As Bael had instructed, she concentrated on moving it slowly up her body, inching it up her legs. Inky shadows flickered over her skin, seeping into her pores, climbing from her calves upward. Magic thrummed up her thighs, her hips, filling her body with raw power. As it raced into her chest, filling her ribs, a wave of blackness slammed into her. For just a moment, she stood in a burning room, and an ancient hand passed her a knife. I need to think of a happier time. The walls of her apartment in New York came to her—a field of blue and gold wildflowers under an azure sky. Home.
Her eyes snapped open again. Bael had been reaching for her, but the look in her eyes seemed to stop him.
She looked out on the world through new eyes, her senses sharpened. As she gazed around the cavern, she could see shadows flickering in the crystals, could smell the warm earthy scent of the mushrooms. And the sound of Bael’s beating heart filled her ears.
“Now,” she commanded from the throne, her voice resonating off the rock. “Teach me to move the way you do.”
Chapter 37
Bael stood across from her in the cavern. “I can see the magic curling off your skin. It suits you. But you won’t be able to move the way I do.”
Her body buzzed with dark magic. She tried not to think about Bael’s hand, running up her thigh. Had he seen the blush creeping up her chest? “Why not?”
“It takes months to learn.”
“I want to try it anyway.”
He sighed. “There’s no harm in trying.”
She crossed her arms. “How long does this magical charge last, anyway?”
“Until you use it up.”
She cocked her head. Power charged her muscles, and she had a burning desire to use it. “So tell me. How do you move that way? If I remember from New York, you can disappear. Like smoke.”
“Shadow running. It’s quite useful in a fight, as you could imagine.”
“And how does it work?”
“Once you’re charged with night magic, you can move from place to place just by thinking.” A cloud of smoke curled around Bael. He flickered out of sight, reappearing twenty feet away.
“You just think of where you want to go?”
“You concentrate, and the magic takes you there. But you must get a feel for shadow magic first. Let it become one with your body.”
“I’m going to try it.”
She closed her eyes, picturing Bael—his golden skin, the smell of his body—like Mediterranean air. The feel of his beating heart against her ribs.
In the next moment, she was pressed against his powerful body. He looked down at her, surprise flickering across his beautiful features.
“Sorry.” She backed away from him. “I didn’t mean to get that close.”
His brow furrowed. “How did you do that?”
“You told me how to do it.”
He shook his head slowly. “No one learns it right away. Maybe F.U. learned it, but...there aren’t many lumen crystals on Earth.”
“I want to keep practicing.”
He drew a deep breath. “Fine. But not here. Come with me to the atrium.”
“Why not here?”
“Because one misstep, and you will plunge into the abyss.”
“Good point.”
She plucked her cloak off the floor, but with the night magic rushing through her veins, she hardly needed it. Now she understood why a demon like Bael felt invulnerable to the cold.
She followed behind him over the narrow bridge—so like her visions of the void. But she no longer felt a strong desire to throw herself in.
As the got to the other side of the bridge, she walke
d by Bael’s side, her arm brushing against his. Every time she thought of his magic skimming up her thigh, a dangerous heat burned through her body. But what did that even mean?
She’d become dangerously aroused, and then he’d jerked away, like he was on fire. Had he realized—was he disgusted by it? The very thought of his revulsion made her want to curl up in the void and never come out again.
You mean nothing to me, he’d said. Ursula had always been of the opinion that you should take someone at their word. Occam’s razor and all that. Plus, it was impossible to guess what another person was thinking, so all you had to rely on was their words.
She stole a quick look at Bael, who faced straight ahead. He probably wasn’t thinking about the feel of his hand on her thigh. And neither should she, considering they were both facing death in a few days. Get it together, Ursula.
The Black Death was parading through the city streets, and there she was, dreaming about shagging.
The tunnel opened up in the atrium, and Bael stopped, eyeing her. “I don’t know how, but you’ve already worked out how to move. You concentrate on where you want to go and your body moves there. But you must use this power sparingly. If you shadow run, you use up your magical reserves. During the duel, you won’t have a way to recharge. You must be judicious.”
“I understand.”
He pointed to a spot on the mosaic floor. “Can you shadow run from where you are now to the lion’s mane?
Ursula concentrated, feeling the shadow magic ripple through her body, rushing over her skin like a night wind. In a blur of black, she reappeared on the mane. The shattered tile bit into her bare feet.
She folded her arms. “Easy peasy.”
“Don’t get cocky.” He pointed to a place behind him, close to the wall. “Now try here.”
Ursula stared at the spot, in the half of the room where the mosaic tile lay intact. She breathed in, letting the shadow magic wash through her body. As she flitted through the air, Bael reached out, letting his fingers brush over her arm.
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