by Tessa Elaine
I never want to disappoint them or to hear them say I’m not good enough for their daughter. Honestly, I’m not, but I don’t think anyone is good enough for Sarah. I know Lucas will get over it, I just don’t think I can handle Eva and Barrett not approving.
When Sarah walked out Monday and went back to her house, I knew she was mad. I thought giving her some space would be good, but now, I’m not so sure. I’ve tried calling and texting, not getting any response. I went by her house, but her car was gone. I hate this void I feel, not having her by my side. I can feel myself slowly slipping.
I know it's not fair to put my happiness all on her, but she’s it. She is what makes it easy to breathe. She makes me want to get up in the morning. Makes me want to be a better man. It’s not fair at all to let her carry that burden.
She is my light, and without her, I am sinking back into my darkness.
I call my sister and ask if she’s heard from her, and of course, she hasn’t. Mama hears me on the phone and asks me to come fix a couple things at the house. I spend Tuesday marking off Mama’s to-do list. Changing light bulbs, fixing the clog in the sink, and cutting the tree that fell in the backyard. The whole time checking my phone wishing like hell my princess would call me.
I head home for the night and take care of my own chores. Mutt is sulking through the house sensing something is off. He knows I’m not in a good place and my mood is shit. Mutt has grown attached to my beautiful girl too, how could he not. My girl has a way of taking a scraggly ol’ dog and loving him enough to bring him back to life.
I wake up Wednesday needing my girl more than ever. I haven’t slept since she left and sleeping in her arms was the best sleep I have had in years. I need to fix this.
I do the same as I have the last few days, calling, texting, and going by her house, still nothing. Where could she be? I go by the ranch to see if anything needs to be done, maybe Lucas will mention something while I’m there.
I walk into the ranch house, but it’s not Lucas that's there it’s Elena. She looks at me the second I step through the door, and I see it on her face, she knows. I am so fucked. I called her out when she first got here, about hurting my friend, and I think the roles have just reversed.
“Hey, Wyatt,” Elena says sweetly. She’s sitting at the table, and it looks like she's going through photos.
“Elena.” I’m not sure how to approach her. “Lucas here?” I ask.
She shakes her head and kicks the chair out across from her. A silent invitation to sit. I take a seat, but she doesn’t look up at me once. Elena just sits there going through what look like old photos.
We sit there for a bit, her making two stacks of pictures, me just waiting on the ass eating I know is coming. She gets to the bottom of the boxes she is going through and pushes a small stack across the table to me. I freeze at the first photo.
“You know I left everything when I took off, right?” I nod my head, and she continues, sitting back in her chair sipping her tea. “When I came here for the first time in seven years, the pictures were the hardest part. Seeing how happy we used to be made me wish I could go back in time, change things.” I grunt an agreement, it’s the only response I have.
I have no words while I look at these photos from the past. I did the same thing when I got back from the army. I tried to look at the man I used to be and wish like hell I was still that guy.
“After they died I didn’t think I deserved to be happy without them. I honestly didn’t think I could find happiness until that stubborn man came back into my life. He picked me up, dusted off all my sorrow, and gave me a reason to be happy.” I look up and see Elena reach down and rub her belly. My eyes go to her stomach, then back to her face. I see the glow I didn’t notice before. Lucas and Elena are going to have a baby. Shit, that’s amazing.
“God am I happy; never been so happy in my life. I miss my mom and dad every day and wish like hell they were still here. But look at what we have, at what we are building. It’s beautiful, and they would want me to be happy.” She pauses, watching me go through the pictures.
Stopping at the last few photos, I spread them out in front of me. They are of me, Lucas, Sarah, and Elena, when we were really small. About the time I first met everyone and started to hang around a lot.
“Where did you get these?” I ask her.
“Eva had them in a box and was saving them for Lucas and Sarah.” I can only shake my head while I look down at them.
In every one of these Sarah is looking at me like I hung the moon. Like her world starts and stops with me. We were just kids.
“You see it, don’t you?” she whispers.
I can’t take my eyes off the skinny little blonde. That’s all knees and elbows, bright eyes, and cute little dimple when she smiles.
“Even as a little girl Sarah knew what she wanted, called you her hero.”
“I’m no one's hero,” I grunt out.
“After you stopped the bullies on that playground, you were to her. She has loved you for a long time and has tried so damn hard to push her feelings to the back. She didn't want to hurt those around her, including you and Lucas.” I look up at Elena, and she looks me dead in the eyes.
“But you know who was actually getting hurt, Wyatt? Sarah. She’s the one paying the price for everyone else’s feeling because you're worried about what her family will say. She pays the price, so you won't lose your best friend, while she loses her heart. How is that fair?”
“It’s not,” I tell her, barely getting the words out.
“Stop making her pay for others having a problem with the two of you together. She deserves better.” Elena stands from her chair and squeezes my shoulder as she walks by. “You both deserve to be happy, Wyatt. Lock up when you leave, would you?”
I nod not saying a word as Elena leaves me sitting there looking at a little girl that has loved me longer then I knew. Loved me so much she would give up her own happiness, so I didn’t lose the people in my life. I really fucked this one up.
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, and I know she will be at her parent's house. Can’t avoid me there. It's all or nothing, and it's time to get my shit together. I should be shouting to the whole fucking world who my girl is, not hiding and hoping they won't find out.
My life could not get any better than spending the rest of it with that amazing woman. Showing her and everyone around us how perfect she is. I will take the ass-whoopin' that's coming from my oldest friend, and I will prove every day to her parents that I am good enough. Starting tomorrow.
I head to my Mama’s after locking up the ranch. When I walk into the house, she greets me with a hug and a big smile. It's time to be present in everyone's life, and the best place to start is at home.
“Well isn't this a pleasant surprise,” Mama says, leading the way to the kitchen.
I can already smell the pies that are cooking in the oven.
“Thought I would come by and help out with the dessert for dinner tomorrow.” Mama is looking at me like I'm up to something because I have never once offered to help cook pie.
“Well grab an apron and start rolling out that crust.” I smile and shake my head but do as mama tells me.
When Lex walks in, she gets a kick out of me in one of mama's aprons and starts taking pictures for blackmail. What are little sisters for?
The night goes on like this, the three of us cooking and spending some well needed time together. Enjoying this time with my family I can't help but picture Sarah here with us, finally bring both Cruz and Wayne family together.
“What has my boy smiling like that?” Before I can answer Lex and her big mouth do it for me.
“Wyatt's in love, mama.” She's making kissing sounds and holding two Strawberries together like they're making out.
There is a big bowl of pumpkin right in front of me, so I scoop up a little and fling it at her.
“Wyatt!” Lexington screeches and starts to throw more food, but mama stops her before things get out of
hand.
Lex sticks her tongue out at me and walks to the sink to clean up. I can feel mama's eyes burning a hole in the back of my head.
“Wyatt Mateo Cruz!” Oh shit, she's breaking out the middle name. “This woman you are in love with better be a petite blonde that loves this family. Or so help me, we will be having a come to Jesus talk.” I can't help but smile.
“That's awfully specific mama.”
“Boy, don't get smart with me.” I love my mother, and I love how much she loves Sarah.
“She might have blonde hair, and she definitely loves this family.” I wink at my mother.
“I hope she knows you're in love with her, I don't think I can watch you two make eyes at each other much longer.” I'm a little taken aback by mama's comment. I guess everyone knows how I feel about Sarah. Let's hope her parents and her brother are just as happy about the news.
“She knows I love her, but I messed up,” she starts to say something, but I hold up my hand. “I'm going to fix everything tomorrow, as long as she gives me another chance.”
Mama comes around the counter and hugs me tight.
“That girl has loved you for a long time. I doubt you did anything bad enough to make her stop now.” Let's hope not.
I crash on the couch at mom’s, and in the morning, I shower and get ready for Thanksgiving dinner. Mama and Lex follow me to the Wayne house because if things go right, I will be taking my princess home with me tonight. Fingers crossed she can forgive me.
Chapter 22
Sarah
Spending the last two days at home has been refreshing. When I say home, I mean the house I grew up in. This place will always be home. My old room is exactly how it was when I left for college.
The smell of Thanksgiving is in the air, and it has been great to help mom with the prep. Elena has been here and the time with family makes me not feel so sad. I don’t think I could have handled being at my house alone these last few days. I still cry myself to sleep at night missing him so much.
I keep telling myself this isn’t the end of us, not this soon. It’s just so hard to have hope when things are this hard in the beginning. How can we last if we can’t get through something as small as telling everyone we are together? I would feel so lucky to tell everyone I'm Wyatt’s, but maybe he wasn’t feeling the same way.
I know he loves me; I’m just not so sure that it’s enough.
I’m helping mom make the sides, like potatoes, stuffing, green bean casserole, and more. Mom is checking the turkey she started before we went to bed last night. Elena works on the deviled eggs, and then she sets the table. We work great together, and everything is running smoothly.
Elena only asks me if I’m okay once and I’m thankful she’s not pushing me today. I can’t stop wondering if the Cruz family is coming. They haven’t missed a Thanksgiving in years, but what if Wyatt doesn’t want to be here? What if things are so messed up he stops coming around? I guess that’s a good indication that things are over between us before it really started.
Mom must notice my mood because she pours me a tall glass of wine. Handing it to me and standing next to me, waiting for me to talk. I don’t know what to say without telling her too much.
“Sweetheart, talk to me,” she says brushing my hair out of my face. My mom is the most caring human being in the world.
“What do you want to talk about?” I ask trying to play it off that I’m fine.
“I would like to know why I heard my baby girl crying in her room last night?” I look over at Elena for help, but she’s not getting in the middle of it.
I was crying because sometimes life sucks. I love him and miss him so much.
“I’m fine, mama, I promise. Just a bad few days,” I tell her.
“You know what I always say. You’re allowed to lie down and cry as long as you don’t let it keep you down. Have your moment sweetheart, let it all out, then you get up and wash yesterday's shitty day off, and prepare to whoop today’s ass. There is no reason to act like things don’t hurt, we are human, and life is hard. The mind can only take so much before it snaps.”
My mama always knows what to say when I need her most. I had my shitty day, a couple of them. I washed it off this morning, and today I’m going to kick its ass, or maybe a certain man. I’m not letting Wyatt go without a fight, even if that fight is with my own family. I finally have him, and I’m freaking keeping him.
I hug my mom and go back to making dinner and small talk with her and Elena. When it’s almost time for dinner, I run upstairs to freshen up. I want to look my best when I fight for my man.
It doesn’t take me long to get ready, I didn't want to waste any time. I have butterflies in my stomach, and I’m hoping Wyatt is here. My heart would shatter if he didn’t show up today.
Running down the stairs I am in such a hurry I don’t see the solid wall until I’m running right into it. I smell him before I look up and my body reacts instantly. He smells like cedar and Irish Spring soap, delicious. Just the smell of him has me panting and drooling over him like a teenager.
Strong hands steady my arms, and I finally look up, into those deep brown eyes. They lock on to mine, and I am frozen in place. He always has this effect on me, like nothing else around us exists.
Leaning down he buries his face in my neck, breathing deep.
“Princess, I have missed you so damn much.” Wyatt nips my shoulder, and I whimper into his chest.
“I am so damn sorry baby, please say you forgive me. Please tell me I didn't fuck this up. I love you, princess.”
He says exactly what I needed to hear, and it leaves me in a puddle at his feet. I cling to his shirt, holding myself up. Wyatt must feel my knees go weak because his hands slid from my arms to my bottom, helping me stay on my feet.
I kiss my way up his jaw, needing to taste him on my lips, making my way to his mouth.
“I love you too,” I tell him between each kiss.
I feel feral when his tongue finds mine. We stand there devouring each other, giving, and taking everything. I'm so lost in him I don't hear Lucas until he's behind us.
Lucas grabs Wyatt by the shoulder and spins him around, ripping him away from me. Before I can stop him, Lucas has Wyatt pinned to the wall beside me. Wyatt is ready for him though, turning things around and pinning Lucas to the wall.
“Sarah, get behind me,” Wyatt growls. I don't move from the shock of the situation. My brain can't process what it's witnessing.
No one moves or says a word for a long minute. Lucas and Wyatt just stand there glaring at one another, waiting to see who blinks first. Well, it's me. I finally get some of my sense back and try to step between them.
“You so much as hurt a hair on her head, you will be sorry,” Wyatt says to Lucas.
“You're the one practically fucking my baby sister in the hallway,” Lucas sneers at Wyatt.
“Would you two just stop!” I try yelling at them.
“You had better watch your next words, Lucas.”
“Or what, Wyatt? Do you really think I would stand by and just watch you break her?” Lucas is pushing back against Wyatt as they both fight for the upper hand.
“I would never hurt her, Lucas. Sarah is a grown woman and can make her own decisions.” Wyatt is pushing back.
“That's what you do, Wyatt, fuck’em and forget’em.” I've had enough.
“Hey numbnuts, I'm right freaking here. When are you going to ask me what I want?!” I scream at them.
“Yeah, because the last guy you were fucking was such a winner.” Lucas barely gets the last word out before Wyatt clocks him. Right on the jaw. I'm not sure what shocks me more, my brother's words or Wyatt hitting him.
About the time I start to freak out, my younger brother and father come rushing in to split them up. Lucas is trying to swing at Wyatt, but Logan has him held back. Dad pushes Wyatt to the door and Wyatt won't fight my dad.
“Logan, take Lucas to the kitchen to cool the fuck off! Wyatt, me and you o
utside!” Dad shouts his orders, and they are followed, no question asked.
“Yes sir,” I hear all three of them say.
I just stand there lost and shaking like a leaf. I don't know how long I stand there, but eventually, mom and Elena take me upstairs. I tell mom and Elena everything that happened. Mom sits quietly, but Elena promises me Lucas is getting a butt kicking for talking to me like that.
I sit at the end of my bed, waiting for dad to come up and yell at me. For Wyatt to tell me I'm not worth the fight between him and my family. I don't think my heart can take it.
Then mom finally speaks, “I always knew that boy was special to you. Do you love him, sweetheart?” I answer without hesitation.
“More than anything,” I tell her.
“And he feels the same?” she asks.
“I know he loves me, but I don't know if it's enough.” The tears are starting to fill my eyes.
“That's something the two of you are going to have to decide. I will tell you Lucas will get over it and me and your father just want you both happy. Honestly, the only people that matter in this are you and Wyatt.” She smiles at me.
“Thank you, mama, I hope you're right. “I lay back on my bed listening to mom and Elena leave. Letting me have my moment and then get myself together.
I don't know how long I lay there, but I think I dozed off. My bedroom door opening is what woke me up. I look up and see Wyatt walk in with his shirt a mess and his expression unreadable.
Sitting in the chair across from me, he reaches out and takes my hand, pulling me into his lap. I go willingly, needing to fill the distance between us. It might be only a foot that separates us, but right now it feels like a mile.
We don't say a word, he just holds me, not moving with his face buried in my hair. I wrap my body around him and pray this isn't it, begging him silently. Just the smallest taste of what we could have over the last few weeks and I'm done for. I can't be without him, I won't survive it.