by Marian Tee
Stavros’ breath came out in a hiss when he felt Willow clasp his hand. For a moment, he gazed at her unseeingly, still trapped in the cage of his memories as a sixteen year old.
Instead of Willow, he saw his mother. Remembered her talking about how inadequate she was to care for him, only to want him back the moment she found out he was her only way of regaining access to the Manolis’ wealth.
Caged in the memories of the past, Stavros carefully retrieved his hand from Willow.
The rejection hurt, but it was nothing compared to the confusion and shame she felt when, without looking at her, Stavros said, “Could you excuse us for a moment, Ms. Somerset?”
At first, Willow couldn’t believe what he was asking her. But when he didn’t say anything else, she knew what she heard was true. Unbidden, she glanced at Stavros’ mother, and the triumph glinting in the older woman’s eyes made her flinch.
From the corner of her eye, she saw Stavros nod at somewhere behind her back. A second later, she heard Nilo say, “Ms. Somerset?”
Ah.
Stavros really wanted her to leave.
Inhaling, Willow forced herself to stand. To walk away. To ignore the looks and titters that followed her. But most of all, she forced herself to keep believing in him.
I believe in you, Stavros. I believe in what I feel. And I believe you’d never hurt me for a reason.
Chapter Thirteen
Dear Greek Billionaire,
Firing me will not make me desperate.
Frankly, I’m just relieved you took the first step.
It means I won’t have to pay the penalty for pre-termination.
~ The Art of Turning Down a Greek Billionaire
She looked, Stavros observed edgily, like she hadn’t grown a day older in the eleven years he had not seen her. If anything, she appeared to have grown more beautiful, one of the lucky few who aged with grace.
Perhaps it was because she was cold-blooded, Stavros considered humorlessly, making her more reptile than human.
Taking Willow’s seat, Edith murmured, “Thank you for getting rid of that presumptuous woman for me, Stavros.”
Stavros flinched, realizing just then how everyone, including Willow, could have misinterpreted his actions. Fuck, fuck, fuck. All he had wanted was not to have Willow witness his greatest shame, but it had backfired on him.
Looking at his mother, he said coldly, “You are never to insult her again.”
Edith was visibly astonished. “That secretary of yours?” She let out a scornful laugh. “You can’t be serious—”
“Why?” he gritted under his breath. “Because I’m not choosing my partners the way you choose yours?”
His mother’s face tightened at the insult. “I can see there’s no talking sense with you.”
“Why are you here, Mother?” Stavros demanded.
In an instant, Edith’s eyes filled with tears. “Why are you so cross with me? It’s been years since we last saw—”
He shook his head, her tears leaving him cold. “Just get to the point. What do you need?”
Edith sniffed. “I don’t know what you’re talking about—”
“Mother, I won’t ask again.”
Edith stilled.
Stavros only looked at her, his face stoic.
The tears dried from her eyes, and when she spoke again, there wasn’t a hint of the emotions she exhibited earlier. “Your assurance,” Edith answered, “that my allowance won’t be terminated once your grandfather’s condition expires next month.”
His lips compressed. Why was he even surprised – why did he even fucking care that after all these years, Edith only sought him out for the sake of money?
In the back of his mind, Stavros knew that what she was asking for was just a drop in the bucket for him. He knew that giving her what she asked was better for them both, would ensure they’d never see each other again.
But…
He wanted her to hurt.
“I’ll have my legal team contact you when I’ve made my decision.”
Edith froze. When Stavros didn’t say a word, she demanded in a shrill whisper, “What do you mean when you’ve made a decision? Considering what you earn—” She stopped speaking when she saw her son nod. She knew what it meant and before she could be escorted out like some common criminal, Edith stiffly came to her feet.
“This is how you really want it, Stavros?”
“It’s a pleasure seeing you, Mother.” A cold smile accompanied the politely worded dismissal.
Edith burned with humiliated rage. All those years of careful planning, of pandering to her spineless husband, and still it ended up like this, with Edith forced to beg for money.
“You won’t get rid of me so easily, my son.” At that moment, she forgot that the man in front of her was her own son. All she wanted was to lash out and have him as miserable as her.
When she stepped forward, she was pleased to see Stavros stiffening. She knew then that even if Stavros had all the money in the world, she still had power over him simply because she was his mother.
“Do you know why?” She stroked her son’s hair and was even more pleased to feel him flinch under her touch. Good. She wanted him to feel the hurt, wanted him bleeding, and because she was his mother, she knew exactly what to say to keep the blood gushing out.
“You better leave, Mother.”
Edith smiled. Such an emotional voice, but he had always been like that. The less emotional he sounded, the more he felt. It was the same reason why she had known from the start he felt more than he should for his pudgy little employee, the way he had come down on Edith just for calling the slut out for what she was.
“Oh, I will. But before that, I’d like to give you a mother’s advice.” She paused. “You’re about to make the same mistake as your father did.”
“You’re wasting both our—”
“I was his secretary, too, remember?”
Stavros whitened.
“And just like that secretary of yours, I made him believe I wanted him—”
“She’s not like you—”
“That’s what your father thought at the start as well.” Slowly, she bent down and pressed a kiss to her son’s cold cheek just before methodically and precisely ruining whatever chance he had of falling in love as she said, “It’s your choice, Stavros. But remember. If your own mother can’t love you, why would you think it’s possible for another woman to do so?”
****
Willow had been standing outside the museum for ten minutes when she saw Edith Manolis come out. She hesitated for a second before going to the older woman. “Mrs. Manolis?”
Edith’s lip curled when she saw her son’s secretary walking towards her. How sweet. The pudgy little woman to the rescue, not knowing she was about to be hurt herself.
“I’m sorry for earlier,” Willow said stiffly. “I was just—”
“Overly concerned for my son?” Edith questioned with a mocking laugh. “You have nothing to worry about. If I were you, I’d worry about my own ass.”
Willow flushed. “There’s nothing wrong—”
“Oh, there is, there is.” Edith patted the girl’s cheek in a condescending fashion. “I’m sorry if my son’s led you on. But whatever you think you have with him won’t happen. You’re just his secretary, my dear. That’s all I was to my husband, and that’s all you will be to my son as well.”
Edith gave her a pitying smile. “It runs in their blood, you see.”
Fear clogged her throat at Stavros’ mother’s words, but somehow, Willow managed to find her voice. “I don’t believe you.” And she didn’t. She didn’t. What kind of love would hers be if she lost trust in Stavros at the first sign of trouble?
“Suit yourself.” Edith started walking away, saying over her shoulder, “But don’t say I didn’t warn you.”
No. No. No. What that woman said wasn’t to be believed. She trusted Stavros. She loved Stavros. He would never hurt her like that. Never
. Stumbling, she turned around, heading towards the entrance, when Nilo suddenly blocked her way.
“N-Nilo?”
For once, the bodyguard couldn’t meet her eyes. “I’m sorry, Ms. Somerset. I’ve been instructed to drive you home or wherever you want to go. Mr. Manolis is giving you the night off.”
A night off, Willow repeated to herself dumbly. Why did that sound like Stavros was breaking up with her? She forced a smile. “I’d like to speak…” She tried to take a step forward, but Nilo blocked her way. She tried to sidestep him, but the bodyguard blocked her way again.
Ah.
“That bad?” she tried to joke. Inside her, a jackhammer started working, bang, bang, bang, doing its best to drill a hole in her heart.
Nilo’s voice was heavy. “I’m sorry, Ms. Somerset.”
“Then…let me pass?”
“I’m sorry, ma’am, but I can’t go against my orders.”
Ah.
Willow managed to nod understandingly. It wasn’t Nilo’s fault his boss was being a schmuck. “I’ll wait for him here then.” Faster, faster, the jackhammer inside her was working like it was set on high speed.
Nilo seemed to want to say something but in the end, he only nodded. “I’ll keep you company here, ma’am.” A pause. “I’m sorry about this, Ms. Somerset.”
“Thanks, Nilo.” She didn’t look at him as she mumbled the words. She only stared ahead, eyes stinging. If she ever looked at Nilo, she knew she’d end up breaking down.
Together, they waited, the silence painful, minutes turning into hours, but still Stavros didn’t come out. A part of her was reeling, floating – unable to believe that what was happening was real. Was it only this morning that she and Stavros had breakfast together? Was it only this morning he had promised he would…have sex with her?
The thought had her laughing out loud.
“Ms. Somerset?” Nilo’s voice was worried.
“S-sorry.” God, it was so hard to stop laughing.
“Ms. Somerset, Mr. Manolis is coming out.”
Ah, well, that was a good way to stop her from laughing. Even as she was spinning around to face him, she was already rehearsing the words she wanted to say.
What the fuck’s going on? Do you know how much you’re hurting me? Can’t you please let me help you?
But when her eyes clashed with his, none of the words felt…right. She watched Stavros’ face harden at the sight of her, and inside her, the jackhammer finally managed to drill the tiniest hole, just about the size of an eye of a needle.
Willow forced her limbs to move. When she reached him, Stavros raised a brow at her.
Ah.
This was the first time she didn’t like that look of his. How could she when that look of his was asking her why the fuck she was calling him Stavros during work hours?
Shiiiiiit. It made her want to laugh again and maybe keep on laughing until she stopped hurting.
Why are you doing this to me? To us? Why? But because she was such a damn coward, she ended up doing it the way he wanted. “Mr. Manolis.” Shit, shit, shit. How low could she sink?
The look on Willow’s face made Stavros’ fists clench. Why are you still here? Why can’t you take a fucking hint? He didn’t want to hurt her, dammit. So why was she forcing him to?
Willow drew in a shaky breath. “Are you…all right?”
Fuck, fuck, fuck. His heart squeezed at the question. He had sent her away like he was ashamed of her and yet here she was, asking him if he was fucking all right. Shouldn’t he be the one asking her that?
When Stavros still didn’t answer, only looking at her like he couldn’t understand why someone like her even existed in his world, the jackhammer inside her went wild. The hole inside her heart grew.
She tried one last time, but this time she laid it all out. Her heart on a fucking platter. “Are we…are we still on for tonight?”
Stavros looked at her like she was crazy.
This time, a laugh escaped her. She probably was, to voluntarily put herself in so much agony. From the start, Stavros had done his best to make it easy for her to avoid this kind of scene and yet…
It’s because I love you. That’s why I’m doing this. HOW CAN YOU NOT GET IT, YOU SCHMUCK!
“I told you from the start, didn’t I?” Stavros’ voice was harsh. “I’m not the man for you.”
Ah. Willow’s body shook at the effort it took to control her hysterical laughter. He was right. He had told her that. And stupid her, she had misunderstood. She thought he was saying he wasn’t the man for her because he had more issues than a hero in a Nicholas Sparks novel. Stupid her, she hadn’t known he meant it was because he could never date hired help like her.
Slowly, she forced herself to nod. “Got it.”
“I’m sorry,” Stavros bit out. “But it’s better if we just stop this before—”
Willow nodded again, jerkily, cutting him off. She looked at him and said brightly, “I get it really. No need to explain.” Her voice caught in the end.
Stavros cursed under his breath. “Willow—”
“No. Don’t.” She stepped away from him.
Her eyes were so damn bright, Stavros thought numbly. Because of her tears. Fuck, fuck, fuck. “I’m sorry—” He reached out for her.
“DON’T.” A scream that she couldn’t stop, and now everyone was looking at her.
Everyone was looking at her and sooner or later, they would realize that once again, she was being rejected. Once again, she was just not good enough.
Willow squared her shoulders. “I’m sorry.” She managed a smile, her voice high-pitched as she tried to joke, “I’m just…disappointed I don’t get to give you my V-card.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck. He never wanted to hurt her this way. “Willow—”
Her eyes widened. He watched her hold her breath, watched her try to stop her body from shaking, and he knew she was still hoping this wouldn’t end the way she feared.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
When the fuck would he stop hurting her?
“I’m sorry,” he said savagely. “Let’s just end this before it gets worse.” He said the words, knowing it would kill the hope in her eyes.
And it did.
Slowly.
Like innocence being suffocated until it was gone, harmless but harmed.
Pain like she never knew existed ripped into Willow’s heart at Stavros’ words. For a moment, she was tempted to scream. So, so damn tempted.
She wanted to scream. Why? Why make me feel like I could be good enough for you then throw me away? Why won’t you even give me a chance to love you?
So many damn words she wanted to say, but they were, as always, the kind that she couldn’t ever speak.
She looked at Stavros. He was still beautiful in her eyes, still the man she loved, and she just couldn’t hate him. She wanted to, but even now, even with a hole in her heart the size of a damn sinkhole, and the jackhammer still not finished breaking her apart—
She just couldn’t hate him.
Because she loved him.
It couldn’t be love if you could hate the person who owned your heart.
And so she said quietly, “I get it.” Redundant, she knew, but she was hoping Stavros would forgive her for it. “And…thank you.” She tried to smile, tried really hard because she loved him and she didn’t want him to feel like he was wrong for not being able to love her. No, all this was her fault for misreading the signs. “You taught me a lot.”
Stavros watched her walk away, something painfully dark spreading inside his chest as the distance between them started to grow.
Willow. Willow. Willow.
Her name echoed in his mind, a fucking cry from his heart, but still he forced himself to stay in place, forced himself to ignore the way everything in him roared for Stavros to run after her.
This was for the best.
Willow was climbing inside his car now—
He didn’t do love, and she didn’t do love either.
She had said so herself.
The driver slammed the door shut—
It was better this way, better to nip everything in the bud before she got really hurt—
And inside the car, Willow slowly covered her face.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
He took one step towards her but it was too late, the car driving away, and his last sight of Willow was how her shoulders shook as she started to cry.
****
“You may come in now, Ms. Somerset.”
“T-thank you.” Willow shakily rose from her seat and followed the nurse. A part of her was telling her this was wrong, that she was better off waiting for either Brad to come home or for William to answer his phone.
Willow ignored that part of her. Right now, she needed…she needed not to be alone, needed to be with someone even if that person might end up pushing her away as well.
The nurse paused before the last door in the hallway. “Just press the buzzer if you need assistance, Ms. Somerset.”
Willow nodded jerkily, and only when the nurse left did she slowly twist the knob open. Stepping inside, she was greeted by the cool blast from the room’s air-conditioning, together with the distinctive smell of antiseptics.
Silently, she made it to the center of the room, where a middle-aged woman lay sleeping on the bed. Willow sat on the stool next to it.
Charmaine.
Her mother stirred, as if sensing how unusual it was for her to have a visitor. When her mother’s eyes blinked open, Willow gave Charmaine the time to adjust before saying tremulously, “Hi, Mom.”
Charmaine pushed herself up. “W-Willow?”
She lowered her head. The last time she came here, her mother had gone into a fit immediately, screaming at Willow for ruining her life. “I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I know…I know seeing me might upset…” Her voice caught.
She squeezed her eyes shut, knowing that her mother could snap at any second. Any second now, Charmaine would remember what Willow had done to her and start slapping her.
But even so, she couldn’t make herself leave. “I’m sorry,” she repeated doggedly. “But I don’t…I don’t know where else to go, and I just…I just need you to be my mother right now, Mom.”