by Lynn Tyler
Nick swiped his hand through the pool on Liam’s stomach and used it to coat his prick. Gently removing the butt plug, he rocked into Liam’s ass urgently, pumping his own spunk into his partner after just a few strokes. He collapsed onto Liam, not caring that the sticky mess would eventually glue them together. “Love you, too.”
Liam was quiet for a few minutes, stroking Nick’s spine almost contemplatively. “What are we going to do, cher?”
“About Lindsay?” At Liam’s grunt of confirmation, Nick continued. “We have to show her that she can’t push us away. We make sure she gets her space to work things out on her own, but we’ll also keep in touch. She needs to know she can trust us.”
Nick slid off Liam and snuggled into his side, letting the bigger man cradle him close. He stroked Liam’s chest and stomach until he felt Liam’s muscles relax, hoping beyond hope that he was right.
Chapter 12
Lindsay rolled over in bed and groaned. Her head ached, her nose was plugged, her throat hurt, her chest was heavy, and she was shaking from cold even though the apartment was hotter than hell. It figured that her body would break down in sympathy with her broken heart. She glanced at the phone, fighting the urge to call her men. All she really wanted was to hear their voices and to be wrapped up in their arms.
She sighed, melancholia sweeping over her. Maybe a bath would make her feel better. She wandered into the bathroom and stared at the tub, her eyes filling with tears. This was where she was when she’d had her first conversation with her men. In fact, every single room in this apartment held memories of them.
She collapsed on the couch and cuddled up with a box of tissues. She flicked through the television channels without really noticing what was on until a knock came on her door. Who would be calling on her? She shuffled over to the door, toting the tissue box with her. “Coming,” she croaked.
She stood on her toes to look through the peep hole and got the shock of her life. “Mom?”
Lindsay threw the door open and stared at her mother. “How did you know where to find me?”
Her mother offered her a weak smile. “I looked you up on Canada 411.” She took a deep breath and reached out her hand toward Lindsay as if all she wanted was to touch her daughter, but she dropped her hand before it could graze her cheek. “Can I come in so we can talk?”
Lindsay moved aside to let her in the door but didn’t say a word. She wasn’t about to make her mother’s explanation any easier. What her mother did next surprised her though. “Lindsay, baby, you’re sick. Where do you keep your cold medicine and thermometer?”
Lindsay blinked her eyes as tears threatened to spill over again. How many times in her childhood had she wished to hear those exact words from her mother?
She watched her mother bustle around her apartment as if she’d been there a million times, getting out the orange juice and rummaging through the cabinets until she found the cold medication. A weird sense of dissociation floated over her. “Mom, what are you doing here?”
Her mother visibly tensed. “I came because I owe you an apology.”
Lindsay rubbed her throbbing forehead, her headache getting worse. “You know what, Mom? I really don’t feel like listening to you make excuses right now. Besides, what kind of excuse can you make anyway? You left me and then you replaced me.”
“You’re right, Lindsay,” her mother said quietly. “I was selfish and only thinking about myself. I should never have left you like that.”
That was it? That was all her mother had to say? “You let me go through hell, do you know that? I didn’t even know if you were dead or alive and all you can say is that you were selfish?”
Her mother walked up to her and looked her dead in the eye. “I was sick, Lindsay. I have struggled with depression and anxiety for years.”
Her mother raised her hand again and this time she allowed it to stroke Lindsay’s arm gently. “I couldn’t take care of myself, let alone a child. I’m on medication now, and it’s a little better. I still have ups and downs.”
Lindsay shrugged her mother’s hand off her arm. She was starting to understand what had been going on in her mother’s mind all those years ago. But it still didn’t mean she was ready to forgive and forget. There was too much pain and loneliness still simmering away under the surface. “You’ve re-married.” It wasn’t a question, it was a fact.
Her mother nodded but didn’t smile. “Yes. To be honest, things aren’t going very well with my husband. We’re in therapy now and I hope we can save our marriage. Speaking of which, where is your Liam? He seems very protective, and I can’t believe he would leave you alone while you are this sick. He, umm, mentioned that you have another partner, Nick?”
Lindsay swallowed around the sudden lump in her throat. “I broke up with them, Mom. I was so scared that they would leave me once the gossip of our relationship got out.”
“Oh, honey. My leaving had absolutely nothing to do with you. You were the best thing in my life. I know I wasn’t the most responsible of mothers, but I love you.”
She led Lindsay to a chair and sat her down before kneeling at her feet. “Baby girl, I know what I did hurt you. But don’t let that stop you from loving them and don’t push away their love.”
Lindsay stared at her, completely at a loss for something to say. She sniffled pathetically and slumped in her chair, suddenly feeling more miserable than ever.
* * * *
Holy Hannah, Lindsay was tired. More than tired. She felt like the subway had run over her. She hadn’t been sleeping well and was still getting over a raging case of the flu. So much for her flu shot. But she couldn’t hang around her apartment anymore wallowing in misery, so she had hauled her sorry butt into work that morning.
She suspected that most of her melancholy was actually caused by the absence of two tall pieces of man-art, as Marla had put it, in her life. They had called every day, sending her flowers and chicken soup when they found out she was ill. They e-mailed and texted her regularly, telling her they loved her and that they missed her.
“Lindsay, you gotta pull yourself together, girl.” Marla appeared in front of her, waving a hand around a pile of books waiting to be processed. “The returns are piling up. Are you sure you should be here? You look peaked.”
“Which is another way for saying I look like a sack of crap. Thanks, Marl. I’ll be fine.”
The library was fairly empty for a weekday. Students from the neighborhood high schools would be flooding in soon as midterms were just around the corner. Lindsay savored the relative quiet and worked away, the giant pile of returns slowly dwindling.
“So. How are things with your men?” Marla asked, having finished shelving a pile of books. “They take good care of you while you were sick?”
Lindsay sighed and thought back to a few days ago. Her mother had called Liam, and he and Nick had practically strong-armed their way into her apartment, bearing orange juice, flowers, and cold medicine. Liam had cooked fluffy scrambled eggs and toast for her, and Nick had run her a bath while she ate. They had bathed her, dressed her in her flannel pajamas, and tucked her into bed before camping out in her living room. They had both kissed her on the forehead before they left the next morning, making her promise to call them should she need them. Nick had shown up twice more, both times with Liam’s homemade chicken soup.
It had felt so nice to know that she could count on someone other than herself. “Yeah, they did. I think I’m going to take them out to dinner as soon as they can find the time.”
“Yeah?” Marla asked with a big grin. “What’s the occasion?”
A shudder of fear skittered over her skin, but she straightened her spine and hardened her resolve. She had thought a lot about her visit with her mother while she had been home sick. It had taken a lot of soul searching and a few more telephone conversations with her mom, but she had finally come to the conclusion that she couldn’t go through life letting her fear of being abandoned rule her anymore. It was ti
me to take her life by the reins and go for what she really wanted. “I’m going to tell them I’m open to being in a permanent relationship with them.”
“Woo-hoo!” Marla squealed like a little girl, clapping her hands and bobbing up and down on her toes. “Girl, this is the best decision you’ve ever made.”
Lindsay giggled at Marla. “How do you know?”
“I just do. Oh, I’m so excited for you.”
A snide voice came from behind them. “Little Lindsay becoming involved with two men? What? Are you babysitting a couple of three-year-olds?”
Marla snarled at Heather but didn’t say anything. Lindsay turned and looked Heather straight in the face. “No. Actually, Nick and Liam are my boyfriends.”
The look on Heather’s face was priceless. Her jaw was practically dragging on the floor, her eyes as wide as saucers. “Wait until I tell everyone. God, who is going to believe this? And just imagine what April is going to do when she finds out. You know, Lindsay, I’ve been wanting your shift for a long time. I guess I’m going to get it.”
Lindsay’s heart was pounding so hard she was surprised it didn’t jump right out of her chest. “Tell her if you want, Heather. I like my job, but if I’m going to get fired because of whom I love then I’d rather not be here anyway.”
That had been the hardest thing she had ever done, but damn it, she felt good about it. Maybe this following-her-heart business wasn’t going to be so hard after all. Thank God she only had five minutes left on her shift, all the same. Now that she had made her decision, she couldn’t wait to tell Nick and Liam. Screw dinner. She was going to drive over to their house right now and lay it all on the line and pray that they still wanted her after all the shit she’d put them through.
After enduring the longest five minutes of her life, Lindsay drove through the city toward their home with a dry mouth, nerves causing butterflies in her stomach. But it wasn’t until she pulled into their driveway that she seriously questioned her impulsive decision to come over without phoning first. Sitting in the car and staring at the house wasn’t doing her any good. What if they decided they didn’t want all the gossip over their relationship to affect their lives? She was already going to get fired over it. What would the guys at the station think of Liam when they found out about her? How many judges would let their decisions be influenced by their feelings toward their lifestyle?
Lindsay thought back to her time with her parents, when they were together before the gossip had torn them apart. Lindsay’s mom, Katrina, had never really been reliable. She had neglected to pick her up at school a number of times. She had missed countless recitals and soccer games all because she had something more “difficult” to deal with.
Lindsay’s father had never really been involved with her at all. He had basically come home, eaten dinner, and either gone into his den to watch television or gone out to a bar. In retrospect, Lindsay’s life hadn’t really been all that different once her mother had left.
Nick and Liam, however, had gone to extremes to prove to her that they were in it for the long haul. They had taken care of her when she was sick, even after she had called off their relationship. They had called her every day, making sure she knew that they loved her.
Nothing in life was ever a sure thing, but she was damn ready to grab what she wanted and fight for it, no matter what might happen in the end. She was done dwelling on the past. She was done with always doing her best to keep her heart safe. While her mother’s confession hadn’t made up for her childhood, it did help her to realize that her mother leaving was not her fault, and that she was worthy of Nick’s and Liam’s love. She wanted to be happy and when it came down to it, she wouldn’t be happy if she wasn’t with those two men. She wouldn’t get those men if she didn’t get out of this car and march herself to that door.
She gathered her courage around her like a cloak and, sending a prayer up to whoever might be listening that they hadn’t totally written her off as a lost cause, walked up to the door. She knocked on the wood paneling, hoping that they were both home. Lindsay had almost given up hope when she heard a soft padding of footsteps from behind the door, and then the door opened. Confronted with Nick’s chest, Lindsay stretched up her neck so she could look him in the face. “Hi.”
Nick arched a brow but said nothing, opening the door and stepping back so she could step inside. An accented voice floated in from the kitchen. “Is it the pizza already, cher?”
“No. It’s a little, lost kitten.” Nick took her coat and hung it in the closet as Liam bolted into the front hall. He skidded to a stop next to Nick and stared at her. It hurt Lindsay to watch Liam’s normally open expression become troubled and hooded.
Clearing her throat awkwardly, Lindsay spoke. “I came to talk to you guys.”
The two men ushered her into the living room, where the gas fireplace was roaring and the stereo was tuned to a French station broadcasting what she thought was the Habs game. A bottle of beer and a glass of red wine sat on the coffee table along with a law journal and a murder mystery. She could picture the scene so easily. Liam would be sprawled on the couch with his head in Nick’s lap and his nose buried in the book while Nick struggled through the journal he claimed made him itch. Her heart clenched at the idea, and she mentally inserted herself into the picture. She would be curled up in the plush chair next to the fireplace with her own glass of wine, or maybe a martini, and a book.
“You wanted to talk, kitten?” Nick’s low voice shattered her happy image, but hopefully after this evening, the image would be reality.
“Yes.” She cleared her throat again. At this rate, her throat would be sore all over again. “Umm. Well, I wanted to thank you for taking care of me when I was sick.” God, she was such a coward.
Nick flashed her a small smile. “It’s what we do, kitten. We take care of those we love.”
His smile went far to shore up her confidence. He wouldn’t smile at her like that if they had decided not to bother with her, would he?
Liam stepped closer to her, his face still closed, still avoiding her eyes. “Is that all you have to say to us, Lindsay?”
The use of her name instead of the French endearment he usually used scared her just a little. But Liam was the more sensitive of the two. He was the one who was more easily hurt and more passionate. It stood to reason that it would take more to convince him she was here to stay. “No, actually.” Liam pushed up his sleeves, and she caught sight of an angry red welt on his forearm. “What is that?”
“It’s a burn,” Liam answered bluntly. “I’m a firefighter. Shit happens.”
Her eyes watered. God, she should have been here for him. She should have held his hand and applied salve to his arm. She should have taken care of him just as he’d taken care of her. “Oh god, I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she choked out.
Liam’s eyes widened a little, and he cupped her chin in one large hand. “For what, chérie?”
She smiled hesitantly at the pet name and seized his hand, nuzzling her cheek into his palm. “I should have been here, like you were there for me. And if you two will still have me, I’ll be here from now on.”
The palm on her jaw tightened imperceptibly, and Liam’s mouth opened in surprise as Nick let out a hum of approval. “Yeah? For real? You trust us to stay with you even when things get bad?”
Lindsay nodded. “I’m probably going to lose my job, but yes. I trust you to stay with me, even when things get bad.”
“You really trust us to stay with you, kitten?”
“Yes,” she said, meaning it with everything in her soul. “You took care of me when I was sick, even after I broke things off. You wouldn’t leave me, even when I was pushing you away. I figure if you didn’t leave me then, you won’t leave later.”
Warm arms immediately surrounded her and tugged her close to a hard, muscled chest as a knock sounded. “Hold that thought,” Nick said as he left to answer the door, collecting the pizza they had apparently ordered earlier.
Lindsay snuggled deeper into Liam’s big body, enjoying every second of it.
She stayed right where she was even when the rich, cheesy smell of pizza made her stomach growl and her mouth water. It wasn’t until Nick spoke in a sharp tone that she pulled away. “What do you mean you’re going to lose your job?”
Both men were looking at her as if she’d lost her mind. She took the box from Nick’s hand and placed it on the table. She urged him to sit on the couch before dropping into his lap. Lindsay stroked his chest to placate him, thrilled to have the right to do just that. He wasn’t distracted that easily, however, and he grabbed her hands, pressing them over his heart. “Lindsay.”
“I told this girl at work, Heather, that I was hoping to become your permanent third. She’s a malicious gossip and will go straight to our boss.” Lindsay leaned down and kissed the corner of Nick’s frowning mouth, nibbling a little on the full bottom lip. “Kiss me, Nick.”
The couch dipped a little as Liam sat next to them, and Nick turned his head so that her lips landed on his jaw instead of his mouth. “Kitten, they can’t fire you because of your private home life. Trust me.”
Nick’s earlobe was looking even more delicious than the pizza and had her mouth watering for a different reason. “Oh, look! An ear.” She nipped it, sucked it and licked it until Nick was shuddering in her arms and Liam was laughing.
“You found his weakness, chérie.” Liam’s hands had slipped over her leg and between their bodies to stroke Nick’s inner thigh, straying very close to his groin.
She shifted on Nick’s lap so that she straddled his pelvis. Liam slid off the couch and knelt on the floor in front of them. He cupped her ass and pressed her forward so that her pussy was grinding along Nick’s rock hard erection. Swinging her hips with Liam’s help, Lindsay rubbed against him wantonly. Sparks ignited along her spine, and her body soaked up the feeling of her two men. It wouldn’t take much to make her come.