by JB Salsbury
Stunned into paralysis, I let his words take root.
“How’s that possible? Were you not listening when I told you my mom’s a hooker and my dad’s a pimp?” I’m processing his reaction aloud and can’t seem to stop. “Candy was right. I’m a grease monkey, and, considering what my parents do for a living, I’m trash. I’m inexperienced, young, and a virgin.”
Good job, Raven. Talk him out of liking you. Why don’t you go ahead and make him a list of all your unlovable qualities.
It happened so fast I barely registered the movement. Jonah hauled me up the length of his body and sat me face to face with him, straddling his hips. My face dwarfed by his big hands, he holds me until I meet his eyes.
“Don’t ever speak about yourself like that again.” His deep, firm command makes me drop my eyes. “Look at me, Raven.” I do as I’m told. “You’re unlike anyone I’ve ever known. You’re kind, smart, funny, gracious . . . hell, you even laugh at Blake’s jokes. I want you. And that includes everything that makes you who you are.”
He wants me. This amazing, powerful, beautiful man wants me. Have I ever felt wanted before? A lone tear rolls down my cheek. His words are a warm blanket wrapped around my heart. Leaning forward, he brushes his lips across the corners of my eyes.
Will he ever understand how much his words mean to me? I’ve never felt important enough to anyone or good enough to deserve this kind of affection. Just days ago, I felt a fissure in the wall I had erected around my heart. With those simple words, he busted it down.
It’s crazy and it makes no sense, but there’s no doubt in my mind. I’m madly in love with Jonah Slade.
Nine
Jonah
I wake up with something soft and warm pressing against the length of my body. My left arm lies flat against the bed, tingling, a sensation like tiny ants tunneling through my veins. My right arm is comfortable and pressed directly against the soft heat. Taking a deep breath, I smell the faint pear fragrance and smile. Raven.
So this is what it feels like to sleep with someone. Her back pressed to my front, I nestle my face into the silky waves of her hair and pull her body deeper into mine. What the h . . .? I flex my hand against a heavy weight in my palm. The feeling registers, immediately making my body tense.
Ah, hell.
Sometime in the night, I shoved my hand up her shirt and am now cupping her left breast. All I need is for her to wake up to me perving out on her in her sleep. I slip my hand slowly from her chest. My fingers skate down the soft skin of her stomach and settle there. Her legs slide against mine as I draw lazy circles at her belly button.
She moans and presses her bottom into my groin in a tiny stretch. I bite back my groan at the feel of her round ass against my throbbing crotch. I don’t think I’ve ever had a hard-on for this long.
Last night, after Raven confessed her virginity, there was no way I could make out with her. At least, not the way I wanted to. The tears in her eyes as she ripped herself apart verbally sealed it for me. I needed her to know that I respect her and that she’s more than a shallow one night. We’d kiss during commercials, and at times I thought I could have gotten away with more, but last night was about getting her to see me differently. It was about getting her to trust me with more than her painful family history, with her body as well. And to do that, I had to hold back my appetite for her. Way back.
Besides, holding her against my side with her head on my chest while she watched Overhaulin’ was entertaining as hell. She went back and forth between mumbling to herself and giving me a detailed history of Ford Motor Company. She’d talk to the television, making her suggestions as to what should be done, and made it clear when she disagreed. I enjoyed watching her as much as I did the show. And the show was cool as shit.
I introduced her to the DVR, showing her how to record the entire season so she can watch them whenever she wants. She rewarded me with a shining smile that I felt in my toes. Her sparkling eyes lit up like I’d just given her keys to a Lamborghini. The fact that I could make her light up like that filled me with more pride than winning my first fight. I spent the rest of the night figuring out ways to earn that smile again.
“That tickles,” she whispers with a giggle as she stills my hand at her stomach.
“Good morning.” I push my luck and glide my hand up her body to her rib cage just shy of the underside of her breast.
A sharp intake of air and she relaxes.
“How did you sleep?”
“Mmm, really good.” She rolls over to face me.
I prop up on my elbow, my head in my hand, and run my fingers down her ribs to where the sheet lies at her waist and back again.
She touches my cheek with a barely-there brush of her fingertips. “I like these,” she whispers, tracing my dimples.
I roll my eyes.
“What? They’re cute.”
She did not just say that.
“Cute? I don’t want to be cute.”
I didn’t think her giggles could get any sweeter, but her scratchy morning giggles are the best.
“Well, too bad, because you are.”
My smile widens at the compliment. It’s not that I’ve never had a girl tell me I’m cute, but everything means more coming from Raven’s mouth.
Her eyes move to my arm as her finger slowly traces my tattoo.
“This is really beautiful. Ryan Allen Slade.” She reads the scripted name. “Is it a tribute to your dad?”
“Yeah, he loved the ocean so I thought it fitting that the cross rises up from it.”
Her fingers outline the swirls of waves then the cross at my bicep, moving up to the sky and clouds. Leaving trails of fire against my skin, her finger follows the pattern to the angels at my left pec. She looks up at me, her piercing aquamarine eyes heavy with sleep, her eyebrows raised in question.
“Katherine is my mom. Beth is my sister.” The words come out rushed. I don’t want her to think the women’s names inked on my body are past lovers.
“And why the blank spot in between them?” Her finger brushes at the unmarked skin over my heart, teasingly close to my nipple.
“I’m saving that for my future wife.”
She pulls her hand away like it’s been burned and ducks her head. I curse myself for ruining the moment.
I roll to my back to expose my right arm and point to the fiery phoenix.
“This one here I got for a two reasons. First one is obvious.” We’ve talked about me being from Arizona and moving to Vegas after high school.
She lifts her head and nods. I’m thankful to see the awkward moment pass.
“Second is because after my dad died, I was destroyed, like I’d lost everything, not just my dad. Then I started fighting and . . .” I pause, remembering the lost boy I was and comparing him to the man I am now. “It gave me something back. Not so much reborn, but redirected. It gave me purpose, a reason to wake up every day.”
Her thoughtful eyes study mine, her eyebrows pinched in concentration. “You found a way to deal with your pain in a healthy way that improved your life.”
“Yeah, I guess. Although sometimes it feels like fighting found me, ya know? I could have gone either way. Jail for assault or the UFL.”
She sighs and rolls to her back, eyes to the ceiling. “If only everything were like that. It’s not easy to do: owning and accepting the pain of our past, the heartbreak, our misgivings, and using them for good. Make our lives better not in spite of it all . . . but because of it.”
Her whispered words are directed at no one, and I wonder if they were meant more for me or for her. I watch her profile as she continues to inspect the ceiling fan.
It’s not the first time that the girl beside me has knocked me stupid with something that comes from her beautiful mouth. As I sit dazed by her brilliance, my mind attempts to piece together what she’s been through. Being the daughter of a pimp and a prostitute in Las Vegas couldn’t have been easy. Her dad was hawking women’s bodies and profiting
from it, even the mother of his own daughter. Revulsion stirs in my gut.
We lie in silence for several long minutes, me lost in thoughts of her, her just looking lost.
Huffing, she turns her head with a sweet smile. “I need caffeine.”
And just like that, she’s back. These last few days, Raven has opened up to me on her own, always changing the subject when she’s done sharing. I want to know more about her, but I’ll let her set the pace.
“Are you always this pushy in the morning?” I tease.
A soft pink kisses her cheeks as she buries her head in my chest. I run my hand up her back into her hair.
“I don’t think I’m pushy in the morning, but then again, I’ve never slept over with a boy before.”
“Boy, huh?”
Rolling her to her back, I climb above her and bury my face in her throat. Her hands slide into my hair, and she holds me to her. I nip at her neck, eliciting a soft moan that vibrates against my lips. It takes every ounce of my control not to flex my hips into her accepting body. I pull up the hem of her t-shirt and rest my hand against her ribs.
“Jonah, is that your phone?”
I ignore her breathy question as my fingertips brush against the underside of her breast.
“Jonah, I think you should get your—”
I silence her with my mouth, swallowing her unspoken words. She hums and tilts her head, allowing me to delve deeper. I do just that, driving my tongue against hers. As slow as I can manage, I move my hand up until it’s overflowing with the weight of her breast. She presses into my hold, molding my hand against her.
“What if it’s an emergency?” She breaks the kiss to speak before pulling me back to her lips.
I smile at her eagerness before sucking her full bottom lip into my mouth. Her hands slide from my neck down to my chest as she explores my body with her touch.
“You taste fucking fantastic.” I trail my tongue from her lips to her neck with every intention of tasting her breasts.
“The phone. It could be . . . a family emergency.” Her clipped words come out between needy pants. Her hands run up again and into my hair sending the opposite message of her words.
I’m kissing her shoulder, her chest heaving against mine. There isn’t much that could drag me away from her willing little body. But she’s right. And I’m pissed.
“Fuck.” I kiss her hard and suck her tongue deep into my mouth letting her know there’s more to come. “Later.”
With a quick push up, I’m off the bed. She whimpers, her face flushed, a shy smile tugging on her swollen lips. Her face is free of makeup, and her hair is tossed around the pillow in a wavy halo. Seriously gorgeous.
“I’m going to kill whoever that is.”
Her laughter fills the room making it hard to stay mad. I follow the sound of my ringing cell phone to the living room, hoping the distance from Raven will calm my racing pulse and dull the throb in my pants.
Nabbing my phone off the table, I check the caller ID.
Yeah, he’s dead.
“This better be good,” I growl.
“Oh shit. Either you didn’t get laid last night, or I interrupted your morning piece of ass.”
My teeth grind together and I grip my cell. Blake has no idea how close he is to a beat down.
“Blake, you ever talk about Raven like that again, I will rip your balls off and shove them down your throat. I won’t tolerate anyone disrespecting her. We clear?”
Is he fucking laughing? What the hell.
“No shit, man.” The way he says it, I’m surprised he doesn’t follow it with a “Duh!” He chuckles. “Pretty obvious after watching you two last night. Oh, and for the record, I approve.”
“Great. Don’t know what I’d do without your blessing.” I force sarcasm into my words, but can’t suppress a smile.
“‘The Assassin’ settles down. I can see the headlines now. Women around the greater state of Nevada flood the streets with tears.”
“I’m not settling down. We’re just hanging out.” I grimace at the sour taste of those words from my mouth.
“Right, dude. Whatever you say.”
Subject change, ASAP. “You called for a reason?”
“Well, besides calling to find out if you dipped your—”
“Blake.” My tone is heavy with warning.
He’s laughing. “Training today is moved to eleven.”
“Got it.”
“Oh, and, Jonah, I want details.”
“Keep dreamin’.”
His laughing is coming through the phone in loud bursts. “Just hanging out, my ass!”
“You’re an asshole.”
Hitting end, I toss my phone to the kitchen island, making it skid. I grab the coffee pot and turn to see Raven leaning up against the kitchen doorway. She tilts her head, flashing me a sexy half-smile. How long has she been standing there?
“Let me guess . . . Blake?”
“Yep, Blake.” I fill the coffee maker with water. “How’d you know?” Or better yet, how much did you hear?
“I heard the a-hole part when I walked in.”
Good. I’m glad she didn’t hear the part about us just hanging out. I know it’s more than that, but Blake’s nosey ass doesn’t need to know.
“He really knows how to get you going, huh?”
“It’s safe to say Blake knows how to get everyone going.” I scoop coffee grounds into the filter, spilling some on the counter. “Except you, you actually laugh at him.”
Most girls who laugh at Blake are trying to get him take them home. No way Raven has feelings for Blake. Jealousy, mean and ugly, twists in my gut.
“He’s funny.” She says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
I stop what I’m doing and turn to her, arms crossed at my chest. “How funny?”
She shrugs and comes to me from across the kitchen. “Really funny.”
The urge to beat the snot out of Blake comes out of nowhere. A need to protect or mark what’s mine overwhelms me. Something primal and male pushes my feet to move across the room and make a point.
I close the space between us, grab both hands full of her ass, and fuse my lips to hers. Her body tenses for a moment, probably shocked by my sudden need, before her muscles melt against mine. She clutches at my shoulders with a moan that settles behind my ribs. I use my hold on her backside to lift her up on the counter and step between her legs. The heat from her skin sears mine as she presses in close. My hands tangle in her hair, gripping tight and pulling back, opening her to me. Her body relaxes, giving me control. I growl in victory before I break the kiss: no slow sweeps of my tongue to bring her back, just a quick nip at her lower lip.
“Wow.” She straightens out of my hold. With her hands locked behind my neck, she leans her forehead against mine. “What was that for?” She pulls back, her eyes searching my face. “Wait, was that . . . are you jealous?”
She knows? Of course she knows. I acted like a complete animal.
“I had to be sure.”
“Be sure?”
“Yeah. Be sure that I do it for you.”
Her eyebrows pinch together. “And?”
“Baby, the way you just gave yourself over to me? No question.”
Her eyes grow wide and her face gets red, but she doesn’t deny it. Yeah, I totally do it for her. Blake can live.
I run my thumbs across the heat of her blush. “Do you work today?”
She blinks as if she’s just been released from a spell before her shy smile is directed at me. “I’m on call.”
“I’ll finish up the coffee. You check in with Guy and find out if he needs you in today. If not, I want you to go to training with me.”
“Training with you?” Her hands tense behind my neck. “I mean, won’t you get in trouble if you bring a friend?”
I tuck her loose hair behind her ear before cupping her jaw, my thumb skating along her lower lip. My eyes follow the path of my thumb, remembering what she
tastes like. “Friend? Is that what you are?”
She tries to drop her chin. I hold her face to mine, locking her eyes.
“No, at least, I hope I’m more.”
“Yeah, baby, you’re definitely more. So, the answer to your question is no, I won’t get in trouble if I bring you to training. We can swing by your place, feed Dog the cat, you can change and grab some of your stuff for the next couple days.”
A slight tremor runs through her body. “Days?”
I ignore her question. After last night and this morning, with her sexy warm body pressed against mine and waking up to her giggles, her throaty moans, and my hand up her shirt, she isn’t going to be sleeping anywhere, but my bed in my arms from now on. Or as long as this lasts.
“Come to training with me. You’ll like it. You might even pick up on a few things.”
“Don’t think I need MMA skills in my everyday life at the garage.”
“True,” I say, twisting a piece of her soft hair around my finger. “But it wouldn’t hurt to know how to break someone’s arm.”
I laugh at her horrified expression.
“You can do that? Break someone’s arm?”
“Come to training and I’ll show you.”
A quick call to Guy confirms that she’s free for the day. She had a hard time explaining why she was over at my house at nine o’clock in the morning, but it seems he bought her excuse that she was here working on the Impala. Their close relationship puts me at ease. In the short time I’ve known Raven, I haven’t seen her talk on the phone to anyone outside of Eve and Guy. She’s mentioned that she and her mom aren’t close. I remind myself to ask her about that later.
Ready for the day, me showered and dressed, Raven properly caffeinated, we head to my garage. She walks to the truck and waits for me to hit the locks.
“Which one do you want to take?” I motion to all of the available forms of transportation.
Stunned, she looks up at me like a kid who just walked through the gates of Disneyland.
“I get to pick?”
“Sure, if you want to.”
“Heck yeah, I want to!”