by Calista Fox
“I’ve been mulling that over myself for the past week,” she admitted. “It’s incredibly difficult to reconcile, let alone articulate. Except to say that being with you both—on the plane, during a business transaction, dinner, whatever—fixes things inside me. The way we were torn apart from one another. The different destinies we had. The years we’ve spent engrossed in corporate affairs instead of personal ones. There’s such a defining element to all that we’ve held out for these past ten years.” She gave Rogen an imploring look. Then slid it toward Vin. “Right?”
Vin stood. He refreshed his cognac and sipped. She didn’t press him. Though she awaited his response with bated breath.
He was halfway through his nightcap when he turned to her and said, “I’m not going to stand here and say the only reason I haven’t been in a relationship since you, Jewel, is strictly related to college, law school, and work.”
Rogen sat back in his chair. He let out a long breath. “I’m not interested in committing to another woman for a reason, either.”
Jewel’s pulse picked up. But like with Bayli, she knew to rein in her emotions and not let them intervene with the sound judgement she attempted to reach. No easy feat. Because she was wholly emotional when it came to Rogen and Vin.
But this discussion transcended emotion. Even transcended sex.
There was something more critical at stake here.
She said, “I can’t be with anyone else. It’s a pathetic thing to say from the standpoint of me being so bound to the two of you that I’d rather be alone than with anyone else. Yet…” She gnawed her lower lip. She pushed the overwhelming feelings to the depths of her soul so that she didn’t appear so vulnerable that Rogen and Vin would cave to her whim strictly to placate her. That wasn’t what she wanted.
This wasn’t about getting her way.
It was about finding a way.
A way to assuage all the pain. To bring them together after all they’d been through.
Yes, Jewel had that innate desire to reunite people torn from each other. She didn’t know from where it stemmed. All she knew was that being so intricately entwined with others’ lives and then being stripped from them was excruciating. Not just for her. For everyone.
And it seemed that in some instances there just might be a simple answer for reconciliation. This one in particular.
So she said, “The last thing I want is for the two of you to fight over me. My intention has never been to come between you. What’s happened in the past and even now … happened.” She drew in a steadying breath and surged forward. “What I want is for you to understand that I could never love one of you more than the other. It might not make sense to anyone other than me. But in my heart, you are both it for me. No one else could ever replace you. And I won’t ever be able to choose between you, because I am-one-hundred percent committed to both of you. At the same time. For all of eternity.”
Jewel was a little shocked over her own confession. The acknowledgment of the finality of her feelings when it came to these two men.
Perhaps it was Paris that made her so forthcoming. Had her so willing to present her inevitable reality. Whether Rogen and Vin were in agreement didn’t hold her back. How they felt wasn’t something she could control. All she could do was be genuine. They deserved that from her. Direct and to the point. So they could make their own decisions.
Which she didn’t expect them to do in one evening. The trio had reunited just over a week ago. A hell of a lot had happened in that short span of time. There was a lot to process.
She stood and deposited her snifter at the wet bar, then went into the master suite of the private executive residence she’d rented for the trip. Jewel pulled back the thick, luxurious bedcovering and slipped between sateen sheets.
Rogen and Vin joined her. She lay on her side again, this time facing Vin.
He said, “Don’t take our reticence as rejection, baby.”
“I’m not. In truth, I’m still absorbing the idea myself. But I’d be lying if I said taboo doesn’t suddenly appeal to me.”
“Mm,” he murmured against her lips. “Definite thrill seeker.”
“Why don’t we try a little experiment?” Rogen suggested. “Take it slow.”
A thrill chased through her. “As I’ve mentioned, I’m always willing to experiment.”
Vin kissed her as Rogen’s hands explored her body and his lips and tongue skated over her shoulder, along her nape, between her shoulder blades. The feathery touch of Rogen’s mouth on her skin and the fiery sensation of Vin’s tongue tangling with hers were the perfect combination of eroticism. A very specific example of why she felt complete when she was with them.
Rogen’s hands snaked around her to cup and caress her breasts. Vin’s fingers glided over her slick folds, teasing her. Both men were hard. She felt Rogen’s erection against her lower back; Vin’s nestled against her stomach. She writhed between them, their cocks rubbing her tingling flesh, turning her blood molten.
Her palm pressed to Vin’s chest. Her other hand clasped his biceps. He continued the red-hot kiss. Rubbed her pussy lips, making her wetter.
Jewel lifted her leg and draped it over Vin’s waist. Rogen apparently took that as an invitation, because he eased his cock into her from behind. Pumped slowly.
Jewel’s grip on Vin tightened. Exhilaration ribboned through her. She had a feeling this was about to get a hell of a lot sexier.
“Vin,” Rogen said in a low tone. He withdrew from her.
Vin entered her.
Jewel’s nerve endings ignited.
Vin gave several solid thrusts, then pulled out. Rogen plunged in.
Jewel tore her mouth from Vin’s. “Oh, God,” she said on a lusty moan. It wasn’t just the difference in their length and width. Their technique. The angles at which they each penetrated her. It was that they worked so well in unison. The tandem act of Rogen pumping into her while she ground her ass against his groin, and then Vin driving more forcefully as his fingers massaged her clit.
They took turns with her. Their breathing escalated at the same pace as Jewel’s. She kissed Vin. Then Rogen. The tempo quickened and they changed up their pattern to three deep thrusts each, one after the other so that she barely noticed a void as Rogen slipped out and Vin slipped in.
“Yes,” she whispered, her lids dipping, her mind going blank. She concentrated only on having them both in her pussy—almost at the same time. It was sensational. The technique changed to two strokes. The pace hastened. Then it was one stroke each until Jewel shattered.
“Yes!” she cried. And her body quaked.
Then Vin fucked her until he exploded. Rogen followed, filling her pussy with his hot seed. And sending a second, rippling orgasm through her.
* * *
“Are you still in love with her?” Rogen posed the question to Vin the next morning. “After all this time?”
They hunkered down at the kitchen island, Rogen eating a croissant and drinking orange juice, Vin reading a newspaper and sipping black coffee. Jewel had gone shopping.
Glancing up from the Wall Street Journal, Vin countered with, “We’re really going to have this conversation now?”
“Well, my lip’s pretty much healed, so I think I can handle a rematch. Though … I do owe you.”
“If the mood strikes, be sure to hit me in the gut. Don’t mess up this perfect face of mine.”
Rogen let out a hearty laugh, despite the tension created by the touchy subject matter—his question regarding Jewel. “A black eye would be a huge improvement. Trust me.”
Vin scowled.
Rogen said, “Seriously, man. Are you?”
With a sigh, Vin set aside WSJ. His jaw clenched briefly as he seemed to contemplate what he did or didn’t want to divulge. Then offered, “For a while, after your e-mail, I thought I hated her. I honestly didn’t see the betrayal coming. I guess because of all the plans we’d made. Her trip to Trinity was shitty timing and … I don’t know.” He blew
out a puff of air. “As much stock as she’d put into prom and our future, so had I. There was a … Oh, fuck.”
He slid from his stool and stepped away from the breakfast bar. Turned his back on Rogen and poured more coffee from the stainless-steel carafe.
Rogen’s stomach twisted. Intuition kicked in. He had a damn good idea what Vin had just been about to say. Masochistic as it was, he prompted, “There was a … what?”
Facing Rogen, Vin wore a stony expression as he said, “A ring. I bought her a ring. A really fucking big-ass diamond ring.”
“Ah, shit.” Rogen’s gut took a dive south. Mostly over the fact that Vin had been ready to stake a claim on Jewel—whom Rogen had considered, until recent events, his woman. But also because Rogen had inadvertently foiled Vin’s plans. And shattered Jewel’s dream.
Son of a bitch.
“It wasn’t as though I wanted us to get married the day after graduation or anything,” Vin explained. “I was going to give her the ring on prom night. Then we’d go to college and maybe after we turned twenty-one or graduated we’d tie the knot. I just wanted her to know how serious I was about her.”
Vin shook his head, sighed with notable agitation. Then added, “Problem was, I flew off the handle when I found out she’d gone to you. It hurt. I wanted to hurt her back. That’s irrational and petty, but then again, we were eighteen—what the hell did we know about being rational?”
“She was pretty devastated when she called me afterward, to see if I’d heard from you at all. But she wouldn’t tell me why she was so upset. Just that she needed to talk to you and couldn’t reach you.”
“I ditched my phone,” Vin told him. “Bought a new one. With a new number. So I didn’t have to see her calls or e-mails coming through. So I didn’t have her number programmed in. Hell, I even changed my e-mail address.”
“That was harsh,” Rogen commented. Then said, “Though I likely would have done the exact same thing in your shoes.”
“The thing is,” Vin told him in a darker tone, suddenly opening up, “you always let her know how you felt about her. You always complimented her. Always told her you loved her, once you’d realized it. I never did.”
“You never said you loved her?”
Vin gave a sharp shake of his head. “I was much too obstinate—or maybe arrogant—about it. I wanted her to say it first, so I’d know she was really over you. Serious about moving on. With me. But I definitely felt it. Christ,” he groaned. “I think I fell in love with her the first time I was inside her. She gave me this look … all wide-eyed and breathy. Then she smiled. Goddamn, she has the prettiest smile.”
“Yeah. She does.”
“As prom night was rolling around, though,” Vin confessed, “I didn’t care who said it first, because I was damn certain we were on the same page. So I was willing to take a chance. But then everything between us blew up. End of story.”
Rogen stood and rounded the island. Slugged Vin in the gut, and he nearly doubled over.
“What the hell?” he roared.
“That was for fucking my girlfriend.”
Vin glared. “She wasn’t your girlfriend at the time. She hadn’t seen you in eight months.”
“That’s why I didn’t punch you in the face.”
* * *
Jewel was already on the jet when the guys showed up. Vin yanked the hem of his polo shirt from his dress pants and flashed his ridged stomach, with a light bruise on it.
She gaped. Shot Rogen a look. Demanded, “I thought you two were done fighting over me.”
“Yeah, well, it was … what’d you call it?” he asked her. “Residual angst?”
“Conflict was the term I used.”
Vin plopped into a seat next to Jewel. Gave her his roguish grin. “Doesn’t hurt, baby. I was just trying to gain a little sympathy from you.”
“Jerk,” she quipped. Then kissed him.
Rogen snickered.
Turning her attention to him, she said, “Did you get out all of your aggression?”
“For the moment.”
“Rogen.”
“Jewel,” he countered. Then leaned forward, his elbows on his thighs, his hands dangling between his parted legs. “The fact is, we all fucked up ten years ago. You should have told me about Vin. I shouldn’t have gloated that you’d just been with me at Trinity. And he should have admitted he was in love with you.”
She sucked in a breath. Whipped her head in Vin’s direction. “You never once uttered those words.”
“Neither did you,” he challenged.
“I was going to,” she assured him. “Prom night.”
“Yeah. Me, too.”
“Such idiots,” Rogen said in a light tone, obviously trying to keep the tension from ratcheting. “Tell her about the ring.”
Vin glowered.
Jewel’s heart jumped. “There was a ring?”
Vin merely nodded.
“Like … what kind of ring?” she prompted with bated breath. Not that it mattered today. But she was dying to know.
“The kind that looks like a skating rink on a girl’s finger,” Vin told her.
“Of the engagement variety?” she ventured.
“It would have been a long engagement. Till we got through college. But … yes.”
“Whoa.” She sat back in her seat. Took several minutes to digest. The plane taxied to the runway and then took off. Jewel was still stunned.
Naturally, a million what-ifs wanted to infiltrate her brain. But what was the point in entertaining the idea of her and Vin actually making it to prom that night, saying the words to each other, him going down on one knee, and—
Tears instantly sprang to her eyes. She tossed off her seat belt and stood, rushing down the aisle to the bathroom.
“Jewel!” Rogen called after her. “We haven’t even leveled out yet!”
She didn’t care. She locked herself in the lavatory. Tried to breathe. Tried to stop the flow of tears.
Vin was going to propose.
It wasn’t exactly something she’d put substantial thought into back then. She’d basically operated on a one-step-at-time, even keel. That was how she’d gotten through all the tragedies and losses.
Sure, when she was twelve, thirteen, fourteen, she’d considered Rogen asking for her hand. But then he’d been sent off to Trinity and she’d let that little fairy tale die on the vine. Following that painful experience, Jewel hadn’t considered herself to be happily-ever-after material.
But she had allowed herself to fall for Vin. So maybe, deep in her heart, she’d held out some hope that they were doing more than just going off to college together.
She’d told Rogen at her house that she wasn’t certain a future with Vin would have panned out, because he might have decided halfway through school that he really wanted to be at Yale. And she’d believed what she’d said at the time—she’d never hung huge hopes on what five or ten years down the road would look like with Vin. Primarily because she was accustomed to having the rug ripped from underneath her.
But … wow. Vin had bought a ring.
She fought to compose herself. Splashed water on her face. Patted her skin dry. Wondered if that little tidbit was what had set Rogen off and made him punch Vin. Probably.
So maybe this threesome was a bit more volatile than she’d ever imagined.
Then again, it was imperative to finally lay the remaining pieces of the past on the table, so that they could perhaps get over it all. Move on. Cut the cord on that one week a decade ago.
Well, and the years leading up to it.
Jewel pulled in steadying breaths. Felt a bit more collected.
She realized her heart didn’t just hurt for her sake. For all that hadn’t come to fruition in her life. She hurt for Vin, for how he’d been blindsided, betrayed. She hurt for Rogen, for all the choices he’d never been able to make for himself as a teenager under parental control.
She hoped getting it all out in the open was the cleanse
the three of them needed.
Jewel left the bathroom and returned to her seat. Crossed her legs. Rested her hands in her lap.
Both Rogen and Vin eyed her curiously.
A few tense minutes passed. Then Rogen raked a hand through his hair and said, “This has become an all-or-nothing situation amongst us. What you said last night—that you’re committed to us both … The thing is”—he shot Vin a look—“we’re both committed to you, too. The fact is, we’re all right for one another. Vin and I enjoy threesomes. You’re well aware of that now. But we’ve never met a woman we wanted an actual relationship with, even if being partners in pleasuring her is ideal and desirable for us both.”
“The question is,” Vin interjected, “do you fully understand what you were saying last night, Jewel? What it would really mean to be in a permanent relationship with us … both of us. No choosing.”
“No more secrets, either,” Rogen added.
Jewel forced herself not to bite her bottom lip. She’d meant what she’d said to them the previous evening. But they both had a point.
A permanent ménage.
That was something that would go public.
Something she’d have to share with her family and friends. And, yes, even her coworkers. Because the relationship would never be strictly confidential.
Yet there was a bit more than that at stake. Rogen and Vin each held a claim on her. They were just territorial enough to make this risky business. They’d never fought over a woman, because they’d never both cared so deeply for the same woman—except her. She knew that.
She also knew that the last thing she ever wanted to do was hurt either one of them again. Or come between them.
Rogen was suggesting she become a part of their sexual lifestyle; Jewel heard his convictions. The men wanted this to continue beyond the whirlwind trip they were currently on.
Question was, had this evolved into a case of be careful what you wish for—for all parties involved?
Jewel mulled this over. She couldn’t give either of them up, and they weren’t asking her to. But in the grand scheme of things, in the light of day, in the harsh truth of reality beyond Cabo and Vegas and Paris … Was it honestly a possibility?