by Cindi Madsen
“Merry Christmas!” Mom leaned forward and hugged him, then glanced at Kelsey.
“You remember Kelsey Cooper,” Nate said, even though he had called to let Mom know he’d be bringing her—the surprise method wasn’t his style. But he hadn’t expanded on how much he liked her, and that if he had his way, she’d be moving here. Seemed like a conversation he should have with Kelsey first, but right now, he was just going to focus on getting through this meeting with his parents.
“My goodness, look at you!” Mom threw her arms around Kelsey and hugged her. “I hear you wrecked your car,” she said, and Nate cringed. Of course Mom opened with that—she’d asked him if she was speeding, the way she used to in high school. He shot Kelsey an apologetic glance, but she took it in stride.
“Yeah, that snowstorm was crazy. And then that deer darted right in front of me and the roads were so slick…” Kelsey put her hand on his arm. “Luckily, Nathaniel happened by to help me out of the car and give me a place to stay.”
He covered the hand she had on his arm with his, thinking he was the lucky one. Dad wandered in, wearing his typical camouflage shirt and blue jeans. “Hey, Kelsey.” He squinted at her. “I knew the water in Charlotte was a problem, but I didn’t know it made hair turn purple,” he joked.
Kelsey smiled at him, a mischievous glint in her eye. “Well, it looks like the water here makes your hair fall out, so I guess I’ll stick with Charlotte’s.”
Dad laughed and squeezed her shoulder. “You always were a firecracker. Good to see you again.”
“Thanks. You, too.”
Mom asked about her mother, and Kelsey gave them the update about her marriage and new shop location. Nate could see that flicker of her missing her mom when she talked about her. This morning he could tell she was conflicted, wanting to stay, yet wanting to go. He understood, especially since it was Christmas.
“So, how about some eggnog?” Dad asked, and Kelsey’s nose wrinkled in that adorable way. “I got the expensive rum, too.”
Nate ran his fingers up and down Kelsey’s back. “She’s not a big eggnog fan.”
“No eggnog?” Dad asked. She shook her head. He tilted his head toward the kitchen. “Follow me and we’ll see what other holiday spirits we’ve got.”
Kelsey followed after him and Nate couldn’t help watching her, the way her smile lit her face as they easily fell into conversation. When he glanced back at Mom, her lips were pursed together.
“Are you and Kelsey a couple now?”
He almost said no, because they hadn’t talked about exactly what they were yet. Right then, though, he knew he wanted to figure out a way to make Kelsey a permanent part of his life, no matter what it took. So he decided to be bold and hope it’d soon be the truth.
“Yes, we are. Don’t worry, I even cleared it with Derek.” As much as he reassured Kelsey his parents would love her, he knew Mom would be the hard sell. She was more traditional, and most of his life he hadn’t fought it—not like Derek, who was the one who came home drunk or snuck out at night. But he was an adult now, and he now knew he didn’t want traditional. He wanted the girl who’d force him to decorate a tree with whatever they could find, constantly disagree with his choice of vacations and Christmas movies, and ask him to be her cop with benefits.
“That’s not what I’m worried about. I understood Derek dating her, but you? Don’t you want someone more—”
“Nope,” he said, before she could say something that’d make him angry. “Fact is, I liked her when she lived here. Back then being a few years older seemed like a big deal, but it’s not anymore, and I’m happy with her.”
The lines in Mom’s forehead deepened and then she patted his arm. “You do look happy. And I want you to be. But what about the fact that she lives in Charlotte? I don’t think she’s the kind of girl who’d be happy in Marion.”
“I haven’t figured it all out yet, but I don’t need to. Just let me enjoy this.”
Mom looked like she wanted to argue, but she let out a sigh and slowly nodded. “Okay, okay, I get the message. But be careful. She doesn’t strike me as the settling down type, and I’d hate to see you hurt.”
Taking a risk with Kelsey and getting hurt would be better than the past year of boredom and hollowness. It was like she’d come into his life and filled the void that was missing, and he’d be a fool not to try to hold onto her. He even thought she just might be the settling down type, maybe not in the conventional way, but in the way that’d make him happy for the rest of his life.
…
“We have fruity wine coolers,” Mr. Walsh said, frowning at the bottles, “Or, I can throw together a rum and Coke.”
Kelsey leaned back against the kitchen island. “I’ve never been much for the fruity drinks.”
Mr. Walsh gave her an appreciative nod and mixed her a drink, probably heavier on the rum than she needed, but her nerves could use it.
“So you and Nate, huh?”
Kelsey licked the sweetness off her lips. “Yep. I’m surprised, too, but in a lot of ways it makes more sense than anything in my life ever has.”
Mr. Walsh smiled at that, and she was glad that he at least seemed to approve. Yesterday she’d thought an actual relationship with Nate was impossible, but today she couldn’t stop thinking about how amazing last night and this morning had been. How happy she’d been ever since she’d crashed back into his life. When she’d admitted she liked him too much, he’d said the same back. Hope tugged at her chest, making her want to risk the kind of attachment she usually didn’t.
“If only your wife still didn’t remember me as the girl she found puking on her prize-winning azaleas.” As a woman who attended the annual azalea festival in Wilmington every year, that was an unforgivable offense. She’d actually seemed angrier about that than the fact she’d been sneaking out of Derek’s window.
Mr. Walsh laughed and raised his glass of eggnog. “Happens to the best of us.” He glanced in the other room. “Okay, maybe not to her. But she’ll get used to you again.”
Not the most hopeful statement, but I suppose I’ll take it.
“Are you moving back, then?” Mr. Walsh asked.
Kelsey shrugged. The impulsive side of her wanted to say yes, but that annoying logical side she’d developed after astronomical credit card statements and hard knocks the past few years chimed in to say she couldn’t just quit her job and move here, expecting Nate to take care of her—even if he did say he would. Forever.
Her heart knotted and suddenly she felt like crying. The tug of hope morphed into a stab of despair. Logic was such a bitch. She swirled the ice around in her drink. “I know Nate feels like he has to stay here, run the farm.”
She found that she wanted to take care of him, too, and that maybe she could if she found a way not to be a burden to him at the same time.
“He can choose that if he wants,” Mr. Walsh said. “If he’d rather go pursue a bigger police career in Charlotte, I’d understand.”
Kelsey could tell he meant it, but she could also tell it’d be hard for him, just like she knew Nate would never stop worrying he should be back here, running things.
“Are you about done with those drinks, dear?” Mrs. Walsh called. “It looks like Derek’s here, and he’s got Angela with him.”
The wave of awkwardness hit again and Kelsey was glad for her drink. She took another sip and then grabbed the glass of eggnog Mr. Walsh had poured for Nate. Then they all stood in the entryway, waiting for Derek to come in, which hello, was pretty freaking weird, but whatever.
As if he sensed she needed it, Nate took her hand.
The next few minutes were filled with greetings and introductions and an awkward beat where she didn’t know if she should go for a handshake or hug with Derek. He hugged her, so she went with it.
Then he made the announcement that he and Angela were engaged. Only the tiniest bit of jealousy went through her when she saw how genuinely thrilled Mrs. Walsh was at the news.
Together forever. Her throat tightened. Things were moving too fast. She and Nate had only really gotten to know each other recently. Suddenly she was thinking of moving back to Marion? Planning her life around him?
At least this time she’d been herself from the beginning, but now her brain was concocting dream scenarios with him that were only setting her up for failure. Why did she think she could actually fit into Nate’s life? That he’d want her when he saw how much baggage she really had, between her debt and her trouble fully committing to a career, much less a relationship? Reality was seeping in, and it was cold and ugly. She wished it would’ve waited. Would’ve let her enjoy Christmas at least.
But it dug its claws in deeper, and she saw the future. Phone calls that faded. Visits that never happened. Nate working in Marion, at the police station, and on the farm.
Her alone in Charlotte, crying.
Chapter Seven
The car Kelsey had often begrudged was a little lopsided now, one wheel too high, hood crumpled, with a heavy dusting of snow, both inside and outside. Nate unhooked it from his truck, leaving it right in front of Dr. Joe’s Auto Repair. Kelsey had a feeling Dr. Joe was going to call it DOA the second he saw it. But surely with a little hammering to undent it, and some love on the engine, it’d run again, right?
As much as she’d sworn and cursed the thing, they’d been through a lot together, and the thought of never driving it again sent a pang through her chest.
Nate transferred her metal sculptures to the backseat of his truck. He carried them with such care that tears pushed into her eyes, trying to escape, though she gritted her teeth and held them back.
Everything was ripping at the seams, slowly coming undone. It’d been fun to pretend she could live another life for a few days, one where she got to be with a guy she was crazy about and live in a picturesque little town, where the past was the past, and the future included making sculptures in Nate’s shed, baking in his kitchen, and sleeping in his bed.
She should’ve known leaving their little bubble of thrown-together Christmas awesomeness would screw it all up. I should’ve never gone with him to visit his family.
It wasn’t really Mrs. Walsh’s fault, just like it wasn’t Nate’s. It would’ve helped if Derek hadn’t decided to detail every time they’d gotten detention. Or told the story about how she’d “borrowed” one of the principal’s dresses off her clothesline and made a Mrs. Ballard scarecrow to put in the middle of the football field before the homecoming game.
Nate had cringed through every story, and she could tell he was seeing her for who she really was, confirming her fears that she’d never be good enough for a guy like him. Yes, she’d matured, but she couldn’t change the past, and she’d never be the girl who fit into the role of a cop’s wife. Especially when that cop was perfect in every way, always making the right decision.
Nate was the kind of guy who towed girls’ cars on Christmas and carried their sculptures like they were more than junk.
Kelsey glanced around at the town, a hundred memories of warm summer days and parades and the daily walk from school. Dolly’s bakery was still in the same spot, marked by the blue-striped awning with cute pictures of smiling cupcakes and cookies. When Mom’s shop was slow and the bakery would get backed up, Kelsey would go in and help work the counter. Dolly often brought over baked goods, so she was happy to have some way to pay her back. And whenever Kelsey would go to leave, Dolly, who was a total sweet-grandma-looking type, would hug her and say, “Give ’em hell, darlin’.”
Something between a laugh and a sob escaped Kelsey’s lips. Then her gaze went to the next building, where she and Mom used to sell jewelry—or attempted to anyway. There was a floral shop in its place now, and while it was probably nice, bitterness churned in her gut. It felt like she’d gotten a glimpse of her dream life, only to have it taken away.
Unlike Cinderella, she didn’t get till the stroke of midnight. She’d had a couple of fairy-tale days here, so she couldn’t complain. Not when they were more perfect than anything she could’ve dreamed of.
“If Joe can get the car running, you need new tires.” Nate crouched over and examined them, running his fingers across the non-existent tread. “These are a hazard.”
She pulled her attention off the shops, blinking to clear the tears blurring her vision. “That’s what the guy said at the shop, but I thought they could get me to Kentucky at least.”
“Kelsey, you can’t just drive on bald tires, especially in the snow. You could’ve hurt a lot more than your car.”
There it was. More proof. He was responsible, with two jobs, not to mention the way he took care of his family. She could barely balance taking care of herself and she still failed at that more than she should. Maybe if she tried really hard to get her life together. If her art actually sold. If she wouldn’t drag him down.
Or a hundred other maybes that didn’t matter, because she didn’t even live here.
“Who are we kidding, Nate?”
“We’re kidding someone?” He turned to her, and the half-smile on his lips dropped. He shook his head. “Kelsey. Don’t.”
Her eyes burned from the effort to keep from full-on ugly crying. “We knew it was going to end. The spell’s fading. Time to go back to the cinders.”
Nate put his hands on her shoulders. “I don’t even know what that means, but it’s not fading. It’s not over.”
Pain radiated out from her heart. “You know I care about you, and I always will. But your life is here. Mine is in Charlotte. Let’s just see what happens. No expectations, no pressure on either side.”
“We’ll figure it out.”
“How?” she asked, her voice cracking with sadness and desperation.
He stared at her for an eternity, the muscles in his jaw working. She saw as the truth hit him, effectively shattering the last ounce of hope she was trying to hold on to. Part of her thought he’d find the answer, a magical way to have it all.
Kelsey sniffed, trying to keep her composure. “Let’s not ruin Christmas. I had an amazing time with you. I’ll never forget our mini holiday together.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek, taking a moment to memorize his scent and the feel of his clean-shaven skin under her lips. “Thank you for everything.” She started to pull back, but Nate caught her elbow.
“No. I’m not letting you leave like this.”
“Don’t make this harder than it already is. Please.” She let out a shaky breath. “I’ll rent a car or take a bus. I’ll be fine.”
Nate opened his mouth, but his cell phone rang. He swore and fished it out of his pocket. “It’s the sheriff. Just give me a second.”
He turned away and answered. Since Kelsey didn’t currently have a vehicle, and the entire town was closed down, she didn’t have much of a choice but to stand there and wait.
“How long has he been missing?” Nate paced as he listened and rubbed his hand across his jaw, the way he always did when he was thinking.
She told herself it was silly to fall so hard for someone in three days.
Apparently she was silly, because that’s what she’d done.
“Of course. I’ll be right there.” He hung up and looked over at her. “You remember Stuart Fletcher?”
Kelsey nodded, picturing the older guy with his trucker moustache and seventies-style glasses.
“Apparently he went up into the mountains snowmobiling yesterday. His wife fell asleep waiting for him, and he’s still not home. She kept hoping he’d show up, but he hasn’t answered any of her calls, and she’s worried something happened. I’ve gotta go help them look for him.”
“I understand,” Kelsey said. “I really do. I’ll find a ride—even if my mom has to come get me. You go.”
Nate placed his keys in her hand. “Please take my truck. I can’t be worr
ied about you while trying to focus on finding Stu.”
“But—”
He cut her argument off with a kiss. He wrapped his arms around her, pulled her flush against him, and parted her lips with his, kissing her until she couldn’t help melting into him. “Have fun with your mom. Wish her a Merry Christmas for me.”
A truck pulled up and Sheriff Henderson peered out his window at them. Judging from the scowl on his face, he still remembered her. Nate gave her one last quick kiss, got in on the passenger side, and then they were pulling away.
Kelsey glanced at Nate’s truck. Sitting in there, smelling him, seeing him in every inch of the cab and then having to bring it back would only make this harder. And it was shredding her apart already.
So she placed the keys under the floor mat, grabbed her suitcase, and called a cab.
Chapter Eight
Mom passed an icing-covered Christmas tree–shaped M&M cookie to Kelsey, despite the fact that they’d barely finished eating caramel popcorn balls. The ABC Family channel was on, playing one of those cheesy romance movies she and Mom loved.
“Ugh, why does she keep going back to the chump?” Kelsey asked, gesturing at the screen with her half-eaten cookie. The sugar coma was going to hit any moment—or maybe she should solidify it with another cookie, just in case. “How can she not see what’s in front of her? Someone seriously needs to shake her.”
Mom glanced at her, eyebrows raised.
“What? Don’t tell me you actually like the chump.”
Mom kicked her feet up on the coffee table. “No, but I think that sometimes people choose not to see what’s in front of them. Or maybe they get scared.”
Kelsey sighed, seeing where this was going. “Telling you about Nate was a mistake.”
“That was the mistake?”
Kelsey tossed the last bite of cookie in her mouth and wiped her hands together. “I told you why it wouldn’t work. Movies always make it look easier than it is.” She frowned at the screen. “Stupid Velveeta movies.”