by Piper King
His eyes were so sad, so serious. “I have no intention of doing anything of the sort.”
“What?” I blinked at him and forced out a harsh laugh. “What are your intentions then, Diesel? You going to bounce her on your knee while you drive your truck all over the country?”
“No,” he said quietly. “This is my baby we’re talking about. If staying here is what it takes to be in her life, then that’s exactly what I’ll do.”
14
I paced back and forth while waiting for Lucy to get off work, weighing my options. My boss was going to flip when I sprung this shit on him, but like I’d told Lucy, I’d fucking quit on his ass if he so much as blinked at me wrong. I’d been one hell of an employee, doing long-ass runs, longer than legally allowed, for years.
Someone had to provide for this family, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to let Lucy do it by working all hours at this run-down diner on the edge of a dark and lonely road. She needed to be at home with our child, resting her feet when she wasn’t soothing Anna in the middle of the night.
I grimaced at the thought. Three long months she’d had to carry this responsibility alone.
Well, that was ending right this fucking second.
Lucy pushed out of the diner, her hair in disarray and her eyes drooping with exhaustion. She still looked like the most gorgeous woman on the earth. A part of me wanted to wrap my arms around her and carry her straight home, tuck her into bed, and drive the worries right out of her pretty head the only way I knew how. With my cock. But even though I had decided to stick around, I couldn’t let myself get too close or my presence might end up destroying us all.
Frowning, Lucy paused when she saw me, almost as if she’d expected me to disappear by the time she’d finished her shift.
She was angry at me, and I didn’t blame her.
“Are you sure you want to do this tonight?” she asked, swiping stray strands of hair off her forehead. Her voice sounded tired and defeated, like she’d lost all the fight within her. I couldn’t help but remember the way she’d looked a year ago when she’d talked about getting out of this place, flames of determination flickering in her eyes, and guilt curled deep in my gut. I’d never wanted to be the one to douse that fire inside her.
“If you’re too tired, I’m happy to meet her in the morning.”
“Please.” Her shoulders sagged, almost in relief. “Grams said she’s fast asleep, and if I wake her now, she’ll be crying for hours.”
I fought to keep my face neutral. My whole body yearned to see my baby’s face, but I was determined to do the right thing by Lucy. And if she wanted to wait, then I’d just have to fucking wait.
“That’s fine,” I said. “I’ll wait here in my truck, and you can just come get me in the morning.”
“Don’t be silly.” She sighed. “I know you don’t like staying at truck stops. You can come to my place and sleep on the couch.”
I flinched. Both from the surprise of her remembering that tiny little detail I’d mentioned all that time ago and from what she suggested. No matter what, I couldn’t sleep on her couch. I couldn’t stay in her house anywhere. But I couldn’t tell her that. She wouldn’t understand.
No one would ever understand.
But if I refused, she’d wonder why.
And I couldn’t let her find out what haunted my every mile.
“Alright,” I found myself saying. “I’ll drive over in my truck though. I don’t want to leave it parked here all night.”
15
Why had I just asked the man I hated to come and stay at my house? On my couch? In my home with me? Inwardly, I groaned and smacked myself upside my head. This was a terrible idea. So what if he didn’t like staying at truck stops? He was a trucker, wasn’t he? He should be used to it by now. And after his Houdini act, it wasn’t like he deserved anything more than that.
But the damage was done. I’d already let the words spill from my mouth. It was too late to hit the brakes and reverse back up to the moment before I’d made that stupid suggestion. The only way now was forward. So, I climbed into my sagging blue Volkswagen and turned the wheel toward home. Diesel followed just behind in his hulking truck, and I couldn’t help but wonder what he’d think of the shack I called a house.
Would he grimace when he saw it? Would he hate me for raising my daughter in such a dump?
Well, he could judge me all he wanted. It was the best I could do, especially without any help.
I frowned as I flicked my gaze in the rearview mirror at the truck behind me. As a streetlight flashed onto Diesel’s face, memories flooded my mind. Of his mouth, of his hands, of the very large piece of equipment he kept tucked inside his jeans. I squirmed in the tattered seat, a flash of heat spreading through my body. In those months after he’d left, I hadn’t been able to get Diesel off my mind.
He’d been the only man to ever make me come. I’d spent a lot of time touching myself during those long and lonely months, imagining his body pressing heavily on top of mine, his cock sliding inside me, his tongue licking and teasing and making my whole body tremble until all my pent-up energy released.
But using my hand on myself just wasn’t the same as having him there in the flesh. No matter how much time passed, I kept yearning for him. Needing him. He was the only one who could satisfy the never-ending ache I felt between my thighs.
My whole body tingled. He was here now.
“Ugh!” I slapped my hand against the steering wheel. I couldn’t let myself think like that. You’re mad at him, remember? If I let him have his way with my body, all he’d do was hop into his truck and hightail it out of town, leaving me aching for more. Again.
And this time, he’d be leaving behind a hell of a lot more than me.
16
We rattled down a gravel lane canopied by towering oak trees, their tired leaves drooping low to the ground. My truck battered against them, and the explosion of snapping limbs crashed into my ears. Snap, snap, snap. A sound as loud as bullets. I took deep breaths in and out of my nose, tightening my hands around the wheel. My whole body went rigid.
It was just some fucking tree branches, I kept repeating to myself, but the memories suppressed in my head battled to break through. Memories from the attack. Memories from the war. They tried to wrap their hands around my throat and drag me into a pit of despair I’d never be able to escape.
Snap, snap, snap.
The noise roared to a crescendo. The past barrelled up behind me, and my grasp onto the present almost snapped in two.
And suddenly it was gone.
Lucy’s car rolled to a stop in a cul-de-sac, and I sucked in a breath of relief, letting my eyes shut for just a moment so I could steady my nerves. I never knew what would set me off, what noise would send me to the edge, and I’d come too fucking close just then. My emotions were running too damn high. I needed to get a grip.
I couldn’t let Lucy see me like this.
A knock on the truck’s door.
I locked away my panic, steeled my shoulders, and donned a wicked smirk. Hitting on her would get her sufficiently riled up, so riled up she wouldn’t notice my shaking hands and the way my breath still shuddered in my lungs.
I couldn’t let her see me like this.
Besides, she was looking good enough to eat, and I certainly wouldn’t mind if she got turned on instead of raging mad.
“You going to sit there all night?” she asked in a snap when I opened the door.
“Just giving you a chance to climb in here before we go inside the house.” I gave a wink. “In case you were worried your screams of pleasure would wake the whole neighborhood.”
Her mouth dropped open, and her eyes bulged. Blush spread across her cheeks. I couldn’t help but smile wider.
“Is that why you…” She curled her little hands into tight fists, and her whole body began to shake. “You didn’t come here to meet Anna. You came here to fuck me.”
“No, Lucy.” I dropped down from the tr
uck and slammed the door. “I came here to meet my daughter. But I’m not going to lie…”
I stepped in close and wrapped my hand around the back of her neck, threading my fingers through her long and silky strands. She dropped back her head and looked up at me, her body trembling under my touch. My lips curled into a smile as my cock grew hard just from the look of pure lust in her eyes. She still wanted me. Even after all this time and even though she was mad as hell, her body curved toward mine, begging for my touch.
She just couldn’t control herself. And truth was, neither could I.
17
Diesel’s hands were on me, and my entire body thrummed with an electric energy that drowned out all logical thought. I’d been exhausted only moments before but now I felt alive. His lips danced dangerously close, only inches from my skin. He was teasing me, tempting me, making me wet with desire.
“God, you’re so fucking gorgeous, Lucy,” he murmured just before he began to drag his tongue along my neck. I shivered, a soft moan escaping from my throat.
I didn’t care about anything else in the world. I wanted him here. I wanted him now. I didn’t care if I had to kneel on the rough gravel as long as he took me hard.
“You were gorgeous before, but now…now you take my breath away.”
Before. Now. The words snapped some sense into my clouded, lust-hazed brain.
I jerked away, wrenching his arms from my body. Anger boiling inside me, I slapped him hard on the face. His mouth dropped open, and I stabbed my finger into his chest.
“Don’t you dare do that ever again.” My voice shook.
Diesel looked shocked but not upset. He rubbed his hand across his cheek, but the smile didn’t fall from his face. His cocky attitude only pissed me off even more, and all I could do was stamp my feet and whirl, stalking toward my stupid shack with the stupid father of my baby trailing behind me.
When I threw open the screen door and smelled the sweet essence of apple pie, all the anger dissipated in one quick second. My stomach growled. Grams had been baking again, determined to put more calories into my tired body. She’d been so good to me all these months, and all I’d done in return was be a mess.
“Hi Grams,” I said as I strolled into the kitchen, still shivering from Diesel’s touch.
She sat at the old table that she’d handed down to me herself, scribbling at a crossword puzzle. “Oh, you’re home. Good. Have a slice of apple pie and tell me all about your day.”
She gestured at the pie just as the stomp of boots behind me slowed to a stop. I grimaced. I wasn’t entirely sure how to make this introduction. Hey Grams, this is the trucker who put a baby inside me out of wedlock? I didn’t think that was the right approach.
“Well, this isn’t Jar—”
“Grams.”
Shit. Jared.
I’d forgotten Jared had gotten his face punched by this very man. In Diesel’s absence, my brother had gotten his shit together. He’d given up his asshole friends. He’d even come begging for me to forgive him for everything he’d done. I still wasn’t sure I wanted to trust him, not after those hard months when he’d harassed me for so much money I’d been left penniless myself. And while he had a long way to go toward making things up to me, it was a start.
But I knew neither of them would be particularly happy about the other one’s presence in my life after what had happened in the diner, though they’d have to work it out at some point if Diesel wanted to stick around. Jared was my brother after all, even if not by blood.
Grams set down her crossword puzzle, eyeing up Diesel through her thick glasses. “Who’s this then?”
“This is Diesel, Grams,” I said with a small wave of my hand, not sure what else to say.
Grams smiled which caught me off guard. She usually didn’t take kindly to any man talking to me, much less following me home in the middle of the night. “Like Vin Diesel!”
Inwardly, I groaned, remembering he’d mentioned Vin Diesel to me that night. I couldn’t help but wonder if it was some stock line he used for all the girls he pulled a fuck and run on.
“That’s right, ma’am,” Diesel stepped past me, reaching out to shake her small and withered hand. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
She beamed at him. Actually beamed.
It made me want to slap Diesel’s smug face all over again.
“Well, I will just get right out of your hair, which is very handsome, Diesel, if you don’t mind me saying. It’s late and I need to get to bed.” Grams stood and fussed at her feathery white bob before grabbing her handbag off the table. “Lucy, my sweet girl. Anna is sound asleep upstairs. I put her down about an hour ago.”
“Thanks Grams,” I said, holding out a hand to stop her. “But you don’t have to leave.”
In fact, I didn’t want her to go. Being alone with Diesel wasn’t something I was ready to handle quite yet. It left me feeling so nervous my palms were slick with sweat.
“Nonsense.” She walked straight up to Diesel and patted his thick and tattooed bicep. “Make sure Mr. Diesel here has a big slice of pie. He’s a big boy. He needs his food.”
And with that, she was gone.
18
Sexy little Lucy was nervous. Her entire neck was flushed and splotched with pink. And she couldn’t meet my eyes. She scurried around her house—a tiny rundown cabin that sagged as much as the diner where she worked. She and my baby deserved a better home than this, and no matter what it took, I’d figure out a way to give them a better kind of life.
“Here.” She shoved a pillow into my hands and stepped back, putting at least three feet between us. She didn’t want to be near me, probably because she knew if she got too close, she’d just give into what it was abundantly clear she wanted.
And I wanted her just as much—if not more—but the time for games was over. As much as I’d enjoyed our round of flirting outside, it was time to put a stop to all that.
I wouldn’t hurt her all over again.
I couldn’t be the kind of man she needed, and we both knew it. I’d be here for my baby, but that was it.
She deserved a better man than me.
“Thanks Lucy.” I dropped the pillow onto the tattered couch. She’d made it up with a sheet and several thick blankets, though it was so stuffy and hot in this room, I doubted I’d need them. It turned out Lucy couldn’t afford air conditioning to keep this place cool.
She frowned at my polite words and lifted her nose, almost as if she was trying to sniff out a lie. “Don’t you do anything creepy, okay?”
“Creepy.” I raised my eyebrows and laughed.
“Yeah, like sneak into my bedroom while I’m asleep.”
“Lucy.” I dropped my voice low. “When I take what I want, I do it with eyes wide open. No one would be asleep.”
Lucy’s neck bobbed as she swallowed hard. She took another step back, edging out of the room like she thought I would rip her clothes off right then and there. “Yeah, well. You stay here on the couch.”
I watched her disappear into the dark hallway and fought the urge to follow. Even though she had a lot to say on the matter, her body told me a different story. And every inch of my cock yearned to plunge into that tight little pussy I hadn’t been able to forget. She’d felt so good. Almost too good. And her pussy had tasted so sweet and delicious, I wanted to lick her every day for the rest of my life.
Too fucking bad, D.
Because my demons were sure to plague me tonight, especially after I’d almost been hit by a panic attack on the way here. Quietly, I waited until I heard the sound of a mattress creaking on the floor above, Lucy finally settling down for the night. Then, I walked out the front door, climbed into my truck, and fell asleep on the cold leather seat.
19
Diesel was gone. I should have known. I couldn’t believe I’d let myself get lured in by his sexy smirk, his stormy eyes, and his toe-curling voice. At some point during the course of the night, he’d driven right the hell out of dodge
. I stared hard at the folded blankets I’d left on the couch. They hadn’t even been touched.
Motherfucker.
He’d disappeared the second I’d gone upstairs to check on Anna before going to bed. He hadn’t even waited for me to fall asleep.
He really hadn’t come here to meet his daughter. He’d come here for one thing and one thing only. The only thing that assholes like him were after, thinking with their heads instead of their brains. And when he’d realized he wasn’t going to get to stick his dick inside me again, he’d poofed away into the night.
Tears stung my eyes. I was an idiot. Such a stupid, stupid idiot. Too stupid to see what was right in front of my face.
Down the hall, the front door opened, and the scent of coffee wafted into my nose. Grams must have decided to show up early today, clearly sensing I needed her even though it was my one day off from work this week. Mmm, coffee. That was what I needed right now, even though I would only have a small cup since I was breastfeeding Anna. I had a long day of forgetting all about Diesel’s stupid—handsome—face, and I needed a shot of caffeine to get started.
“Thanks for showing up early, Grams…” My voice died in my throat when it was Diesel, not my Grams, who ducked into the living room. He towered over me, all six foot six of him, the darkness of his eyes standing out even more in the daytime light. I shut my mouth quick. It had fallen open.
“I thought you might want some breakfast.” Diesel lifted a Dunkin Donuts bag and two large coffees, and my stomach growled in response, so loud that the noise carried across the room. Diesel smirked. “Clearly I was right.”
I narrowed my eyes and pointed at the couch. “You did not sleep here last night. Where the hell did you go?”