Damn it. He knew me all too well.
“Um, sure, I guess so,” I said, the words “open bar” tipping me in favor. “I don’t have any plans tonight.”
Although I’d never been to a social function like this before, I doubted it would be any different from my dad’s work Christmas parties I used to attend as a child. It’d most likely be just a bunch of old stiffs standing around talking business and drinking their single malt whiskey.
“Great, it’s decided then,” Lili said, her body still concealed behind Scotty. I suspected she didn’t have any clothes on and they had been having sex, or about to start, as I hadn’t heard her screaming down the apartment. Both she and Scotty were usually very vocal when it came to their bedroom activities. “It starts at seven. Just wear something semi-formal. I’m going to wear my black dress and black heels.”
“How’d you know what I was I thinking?” I had just been thinking of asking her what she planned to wear. Although I shouldn’t be surprised she knew what I had been thinking. We knew each other so well. Sometimes it was like we both had telepathic abilities. “Silly question, don’t answer that. Lili, I’ll text you during the day and arrange our plans.”
“Sounds great,” Lili sang out, now fully awake, her newly-dyed flaming red hair flicking Scotty as she spun around and disappeared into the bedroom.
“You know you can always join us,” Scotty suggested with a twinkle in his eye.
“Bye, Scotty.” I rolled my eyes and turned back around toward my bedroom.
I heard Scotty chuckle as the door to Lili’s room clicked shut. Behind the closed door, Lili let out a playful scream, confirming my earlier thoughts. Guess it was never too early in the morning for that. My stomach turned. I prayed they wouldn’t be too loud. There was nothing worse than hearing your best friend and her boyfriend going for it, except maybe your parents, but thankfully, that had never happened to me. Not when your parents are aged in their late 60s. I highly doubted they even had physical urges anymore.
Once back in my room, I downed my anti-anxiety meds, chased by my water, then collected my pillow from the corner of the room and tried to settle my inner voice. Always an anxious child, I hadn’t needed medication until after my dad nearly died during my senior year of a heart attack. Since then, I had been told I needed a daily dose to keep me calm and balanced. Clearly they weren’t working, as the depression was new. No one knew about that, and I wasn’t about to share. I’d already had my fair share of psychologists poking and prodding around in my head.
Sliding back into bed, I puffed up my pillows and fluffed my duvet, attempting to make myself comfortable in the hopes I would fall back into a deep sleep. For the next couple of hours, I tossed and turned drifting in and out of sleep, lucid dreaming. You know, the type of dream that feels real, like you are awake but you aren’t. And each time after I woke and went back to sleep, I had the same dream. I was falling. My arms and legs extended, the wind deafening in my ears as I hurtled to the ground. Instead of being scared, I loved it. I had a massive smile plastered on my face and I could feel the adrenaline flowing through my body.
Eventually, after I woke for about the tenth time, I gave up on trying to get decent sleep. The sun’s morning rays peeked through the gaps in my closed drapes—new day, new start. Yeah right. Same old shit, more like it. I knew I should get up. And I knew that staying in bed would make it all the more difficult, but I continued to lie there, waiting for my alarm to chime and force me to go through my daily routine. It was Friday. So at least that was a positive. Mentally, I went through my closet, deciding on what to wear to the function tonight, and decided on my black pleated pants teamed with a black sleeveless silk top and black slip-on heels. I loved wearing black. It was nice and slimming.
As for my hair, I didn’t even bother visualizing a hairstyle. My long, dark, brunette curly hair always had a mind of its own. Washed and GHD’d would be about the best I could hope for. Once I had that all sorted, I reached over to my bedside table and picked up my smartphone. I still had a few minutes until the alarm went off, so I decided to Google “falling dreams.” Various pages came up and I chose the first one that I thought sounded the most accurate.
It read, “Falling Dreams often indicate anxiety, insecurities, and instabilities in one’s life.” I contemplated the meaning behind the dream. I already knew I had anxiety and was insecure, but that didn’t explain the feeling of euphoria in the dream. Did that mean I was insecure but happy about it?
Lili would laugh if she thought I was taking this stuff seriously…and then she’d tell me to get a life. She didn’t believe in this stuff like I did. Along with my addiction to romance novels, my shelves in my bedroom at my parents’ home were full with books about past lives, reincarnation, and stories from beyond the grave. Books by mediums were my particular favorite. Some of the stories of people communicating with loved ones that had passed would give me goose bumps. Their love had no boundaries. Reading these stories often gave me hope that true love would find me. That maybe we had already met in a past life and we were just waiting to find each other again. I sighed. I was such a hopeless romantic.
Once my alarm chimed, I rolled lethargically out of bed and into my usual morning routine. A fifteen-minute hot shower followed by a quick protein shake—the latest diet I was on in my attempt to shed those last ten pounds—then out the door to my highly exciting job—not really—of inventory controller at Costco Wholesale. The start of my daily routine was always like this, and this Friday wasn’t any different. Unexciting. Unspontaneous.
Driving to work, I contemplated my lackluster love life. It wasn’t that I was desperate for a boyfriend, it was just that I craved that connection Lili had with Scotty, and my other best friend Charlize with her on-again, off-again boyfriend Sam. I wanted someone to share my intimate thoughts with. Someone who understood me. Not the funny party-girl façade, but the real Andi, the anxiety controlled, insecure and unsure Andi.
Arriving at work, I pulled my two-door, early model, soft top Jeep into the employee parking lot with a few minutes to spare before my shift started. Like my life at the moment, I also hated my job. Although, being in inventory was a step up from my previous position of cashier. My work colleagues weren’t all that bad, despite the fact over half the staff were as old as my parents. If it weren’t for Charlize that worked a couple of days in the office with me, my job would be totally unbearable.
I took a few deep breaths in and gave myself a boost. Friday, the end of the work week. In just eight hours, I would be free for two whole days to do as I chose. Except tonight, but once I put in an appearance at this function, drank some free alcohol, and made sure Lili was settled, I planned to hightail it out of there for somewhere more exciting. There was a new bar I had been dying to go to. I just had to convince Charlize to meet me. Shouldn’t be too hard. Initially, we’d bonded at work over our love of drinking. Also, she and Sam were on one their “breaks.”
Just as I cracked open the door to my Jeep, a late model BMW convertible, top up, zipped into the empty parking spot next to me, RnB music blasting from its open windows and the occupant singing just as loud. My heart skipped. It was Ben, one of the casual stockroom guys. I’d had the biggest crush on him since he started at Costco six months ago. Unfortunately, he barely knew I existed other than to say a casual “hi” when we passed in the aisles. Numerous times I had tried to change my break times to coincide with his, but had always been unsuccessful. In fact, when he worked, he usually didn’t start until mid-morning for the lunchtime shift.
I waited and timed getting out of my car perfectly with him.
“Hi, Ben,” I gushed as he closed his car door, locking it with a beep of his electronic key remote.
Attempting to smooth down the wrinkles in my severely creased uniform, I stood straight and glanced sideways at Ben, locking the door to my car the old fashioned way, by pressing the lock button and holding up the handle as I slammed it closed. None of that fancy c
entral locking for me.
“Hey, Andi. T.G.I.F. Right?” He smiled his perfect smile and starting walking toward the back staff entrance of the building. Hurriedly, I caught up to him so I could at least get a couple minutes of his time before we started work.
I tried to suppress the fangirl expression that I knew was on my face. It was hard when my heart was pounding against my chest. “You got that right. You have any plans for the weekend?”
“Apparently, I have to attend some black-tie function tonight on behalf of my father,” he told me as we walked side by side. “Not looking forward to it at all. Those events are so dull.”
Ben’s family was loaded. I’d heard from other staff members that he was only working because his father thought it best that he experience manual labor before he graduated college so he could associate with the “real world.” He was studying law and his dad was a top brain surgeon with a multi-million dollar real estate portfolio. Over achieving clearly ran in their veins. So, with my poor pedigree, and their wealth, I wasn’t really expecting a shot at him. But a girl had to dream.
“What about you? You got some major plans this weekend? I’ve heard around that you don’t mind the odd party or two.” He raised his eyebrow, giving me a knowing smirk.
He’d heard about me! Who cares that he had only heard about me through a bad reputation? What mattered was that he had been discussing me.
I laughed dismissively, trying to hide the fact that I was about to jump out of my skin with excitement. “Well, what’s life without a bit of fun?” I attempted to sound casual. Fun Andi, front and center.
“Got to agree with you there, Andi.” He opened the staff door entrance, letting me walk through first. “Have a great day.”
And with that, he strode off in the direction of his department manager’s office to no doubt inform him of his arrival before signing on for the day. I watched as his hot ass disappeared around the aisles of canned food. As soon as he was out of earshot, I let out an audible sigh. I had a real thing for guys with awesome behinds. My mind started working overtime on what he would look like naked.
“You need to stop your obsession over him,” a familiar voice said over my shoulder. It was Charlize. “You know you have zero chance with him. Sorry, but just keeping it real.”
I turned to face her. “Thanks, Char. I keep hoping he might realize we are meant to be together. It’s our destiny.”
She laughed out loud as we walked side by side toward our office. “You’re so funny.” Laughter still tainted her words. “You are joking, aren’t you? This is real life, not one of your romance novels.”
“I know it’s ludicrous,” I agreed, not really finding myself funny. “A guy like him would never be into a girl like me.”
“Let’s try and be positive,” she said, trying to lift my spirits like all good friends do, her face now serious. “At least you got to speak to him before work started. Now you will have something to keep you going until lunch.”
“That’s right! He must be here all day. He doesn’t usually work the morning shift. Wonder what time he’s taking lunch?”
My day suddenly improved at the prospect of spending lunch with Ben in the staff room, and I bounced my way to my office with renewed daydream fantasies of romantic lunchtime rendezvous.
Chapter Three
Andi
“I think I might just go kill myself now and be done with it,” I complained to Char as I picked off the pineapple on my cold, stale pizza.
Depression had kicked in, as my romantic lunch didn’t manifest like I had visualized. I only had a few minutes remaining before my break finished, and Ben hadn’t shown up for his yet. Much to my disappointment, I hadn’t set eyes on him since our parking lot conversation, despite me finding numerous excuses to walk down to his department. Stalker alert.
I kept attacking the pizza. Who put fruit on a pizza anyway? Lili did, that’s who. It went against every fiber of my Italian heritage to put fruit on pizza. Next time, I wouldn’t let her order. Besides, I was the one who always paid.
With my appetite completely gone, I re-wrapped the cheese and fruit flavored cardboard pizza in its aluminum foil wrapping and pitched it in the trash with a loud thud.
“You’re just in a rut, that’s all,” Char said, trying to break through my depression. “We need to get you rutless.”
“Is that even a word? Rutless?” I scoffed. I wasn’t in the mood for a pep talk right now, and I certainly didn’t feel like finding a solution.
Char shrugged her shoulders, ignoring my negativity. “Who cares? I’m studying accounting, not English. What we need to do is find you a boyfriend.”
“You don’t think I haven’t been trying?” I asked with just a hint of sarcasm in my voice. “I’m actually resigned to the fact that I just don’t think there is anyone out there for me.”
“Of course there is. You’re just not looking in the right places. Plus, you are only twenty-one, not forty-one.”
“Well, I’ll be forty-one before you know it and still alone. Where do you suggest I look?” I asked. “Because last time I looked, it was the same usual crowds at the same usual places.”
Instead of waiting for her to reply, I decided to change the topic from my depressing love life to a pastime she would be more interested in. “Oh, that reminds me. So, I have to go to a thing tonight with Lili, but after that, are you keen to hit up that new club, The Warehouse? Unless you and Sam are doing something tonight?”
“Ooh, yes!” She reminded me of a puppy as she practically jumped out of her seat with excitement, all thoughts of my boring love life forgotten. Char loved to have a good time and dance. But, unlike me, she had a boyfriend. Well, part-time boyfriend. “I’ve been dying to go there since it opened. I heard the resident DJ is awesome! And as for Sam, well, he and I are, um, not really talking at the moment.”
“Again? I knew you guys were taking one your ‘breaks.’” I used my fingers to show inverted speech quotes. “But I didn’t know it had escalated into not talking.”
She shrugged, smiling wistfully. “You know how it is. Next week, we’ll be fine. He just needs his space. So, what time are you thinking tonight?”
“Hmmm, good question,” I mused. “I’ll have to text you later when I find out the deal with tonight. I’m pretty sure Lili won’t expect me to stay all night. Basically, she just needs me to hold her hand for a few hours until Scotty gets off work. I’m thinking eleven at the latest.”
“Great.” Simultaneously, we looked at the clock and realized our lunch break was over. She groaned loudly. “Ugh, I guess we had better get back to work.”
“Guess so.” I exhaled audibly, disappointed that lunch was over and I hadn’t seen Ben.
“Hey, at least it’s only a couple of hours until we are finished for the weekend,” she said, trying to cheer me up. “Who knows what mystery guy you might meet tonight. I’ve heard the guys at The Warehouse are way hotter than the usuals at any of the other clubs.”
I forced out some optimism. “Yes, who knows?” But I won’t be holding my breath.
****
“What’s with this fucking traffic?” I yelled, throwing my hands up in frustration at the gridlocked cars in front of me. As if I wasn’t rushed enough.
Somehow, between leaving work and heading straight home, I had become late. Like, half an hour late, to be exact. What normally was a ten-minute journey had turned into forty. Traffic was manic. Apparently, a Hollywood starlet had caused pandemonium at the boardwalk while arriving unannounced after doing some kind of charity work at the hospital, backing up peak hour traffic.
Slowly, I snaked my way through the bumper-to-bumper congestion. It was just my luck to be late when I had plans. However, the way things had been going all day, it didn’t really surprise me. Just another fitting end to another screwed up day. I glanced at my watch. “Shit. Shit. Shit.”
After another five minutes of stop-start, the traffic started to flow and I floored the accel
erator Vin Diesel style when the traffic cleared. Once home, I moved in double-time. I threw my belongings in the general direction of my bed and basically just splashed enough water on myself in the shower to classify myself as clean. There was no time to shave my legs or even wash my hair. I should have been at the hairdresser by now to pick Lili up.
Shutting off the shower, I ran the towel quickly over my body, put on my underwear, and went to my room to get dressed. After dressing in my pants and top, I slid on a pair of stilettos Lili had lent me for the night. I wobbled a little unsteadily, arms out like I was walking a tightrope while wishing Converse sneakers were more appropriate. I turned to look at myself in the mirror and, as I pivoted, my heel caught in the hem of my too long pants. Down I went, ungracefully trying to stop myself from falling by flailing and grabbing at thin air. Without anything to grab and steady myself, I took a step forward to rebalance, and the heel of the shoe went right though the pants with a loud rip.
“Mafankulo!” I looked down. The hem of my pants was bunched under my shoe with the slim, pointy heel poking out the material.
Kicking the shoes off, I slid the pants down and sat on the end of my bed. After examining the massive hole, I ruled them out of contention. Instead of wasting time I didn’t have dwelling over the fact I had just ruined my last pair of dress pants, I threw them onto a pile of clothes that I needed to launder, and opened my closet to look for something else halfway decent to wear. Nothing, except my usual attire of jeans and T-shirts, and I didn’t really think Lili would appreciate me rocking up to her boyfriend’s work event dressed like that.
I tried to think of someone who was a size eight like me, and the only person I could think of was my mother. Lili was a tall size two and Char a four, so I had no hope of squeezing into an item of theirs. Why did I have to be so curvy? Big boobs, big thighs. Ugh. With really no other option, the only choice I had was Mom.
Grabbing my cell phone from my purse, which I located under my bed, I pressed her number on speed dial. She answered it on the second ring.
Freefall (Santa Cruz Skydivers Book 1) Page 2