I want to see the other side.
Tears rolled down her face. She swiped at them and kept climbing. The blond woman was following at a distance. Cara knew she wasn’t getting away but if she accomplished one of her dreams, that would be something. Wouldn’t it?
CHAPTER NINE
Darian stood on the roof of the Rizer fortress.
He could see Cara climbing the mountain with the wind in her hair the cold stone under her feet and that same determined stiff spine he’d seen when she’d pushed herself in the forest.
“Will you follow her?” Killian asked.
“I haven’t decided yet. Kate is following her.”
Killian climbed out onto the roof. “I am sorry that you believe I wouldn’t have interfered in time to keep Cara safe.”
Darian exhaled. “I haven’t ever felt this way about anyone Killian.”
“Is it wonderful? To be in love?”
“No,” Darian growled. “I don’t know that I am in love. I’m protective of her, overly so, as you pointed out. I’m attracted to her even when I find myself displeased with her, I have an urge to kiss her. She hates me, and I don’t know how to act around her.”
Killian bowed his head. “I can’t say that sounds like something I would want to be bothered with.”
“She’s so defensive.”
“Like an injured wolf. She trusts no one,” Killian mused.
Cara was coming to the top of the slope where the mountain shot up in a vertical climb.
At least she’ll realize she has to stop and come back.
Darian and Killian were both quiet as they watched Cara reach the stop at the mountain wall. He waited for her to turn back. Maybe she would sit down and refuse to return.
Cara began to run her hands over the wall.
There’s no way up Cara. You have to turn around.
The pack was watching her from below, Darian realized as they congregated outside. Now Cara would have to return to after a public failure.
She paced the flat wall back and forth like a caged animal giving him an undeniable visual of what Cara must have felt like inside that too-small, walled in town.
No wonder she reacted the way she did when I commanded her to stay inside the Rizer pack land. How can I make her understand that I’m trying to protect her?
“You may have to retrieve her,” Killian said. “I don’t think she’s going to give up.”
Darian waited watching Cara as she continued to try and find a way up the incline.
“Let her try until she’s satisfied it can’t be done.”
Killian nodded.
Two hours passed during which Darian watched her cling to the flat wall and fall over and over again.
“I can’t keep watching this,” Darian said at last. “Enough is enough.”
Killian shook his head. “You were right to wait. She has to be close to giving up.”
“Are you blind? She’s never going to give up.”
“What will you do with a woman who will never give up trying to leave you?”
Darian leapt, beginning his descent from the roof to the ground, using the balconies and over hangs as his ladder. He continued watching the woman as he ran toward her. Her next fall would probably knock her out.
She’d already hit her head at least twice.
When he started up the final incline, Kate held her hand up to him. Darian followed her gaze to Cara. She was back in that same damn spot on the flat face of the wall. “She’s going to fall again,” Darian said.
“She worked hard to get where she is, allow her to finish her attempt.”
Darian said nothing but continued up the incline. He would not interfere with Cara’s attempt to climb but he’d be damned if he was going to watch her fall one more time.
Cara was staring at a spot well outside her reach. Her legs were pulled in close like a frog preparing to leap.
Shit, Cara.
He stood beneath Cara looking up at her limbs shaking with the strain.
“You’re here to stop me?” Cara asked without looking at him.
“No, Cara. I’m here to catch you if you fall.”
When she looked down at him his heart ached at the sight of her red eyes and wet face. “Why? I thought I wasn’t allowed to leave.”
“I was…” Darian looked back down the incline where Kate was still standing and would no doubt hear him. “I was wrong to command you to stay on Rizer land. You are free to come and go as you please.”
“You’re not going to trick me into staying,” She said turning her face away from him again.
Darian laughed. He didn’t know what else to do. “I don’t have to trick you. I could just command you until you submit, but I’m not.”
“I’m leaving.”
“So, leave already,” Darian growled.
Cara leapt.
Darian held his breath hoping for her despite himself that she’d make it, that her hands would stretch out far enough and catch hold.
Come on, Cara.
Her left hand slid over the smooth rock missing the grip.
Darian moved under her to catch her but her right hand found a hold. Cara’s body smacked into the wall as she held on. The pack started howling in applause for her, though he wasn’t sure if she understood that’s what they were doing.
“Don’t stop now,” Darian called up. “You’ve got this, Cara.”
She reached up with her left hand grabbing onto the same grip. Her legs clung to the wall and little by little she continued to climb. Darian leapt up and began climbing behind her.
With that mighty jump, Cara defeated the most difficult part of the climb. The rest went by relatively fast. When she reached the summit, she stopped to gaze down at the other side.
“Now what?” Darian asked as he came to stand beside her.
“I don’t know,” Cara admitted. “I thought when I got up here I’d see a new mountain to climb to, or a big city.”
Darian nodded. His hands itching to take her in his arms and make her accept the comfort he wanted to give her.
Cara’s blue eyes swept over the desolate landscape on the other side of the mountain. “I thought shifters were evil,” Cara swallowed. “Today I watched you fight your own family to stand up for me. I don’t know why you’d do that. I’m no one.”
“He was wrong to threaten you,” Darian said. He wasn’t admitting to anything more when she was so close to leaving anyway.
“My own family has stood by when I’ve been handed worse than just threats.” She cleared her throat. Darian could see she was fighting off tears. “I stood by too. I’m not any better than my father. When Aldrich took that young woman and we all knew she was being mistreated, we didn’t help her.” Cara didn’t try anymore to hold back her tears. “I didn’t help her.”
Darian reached out and wiped away the tears running over her bruised cheek. “It looks like you stood up against Aldrich wherever you could.”
Cara nodded. “I can’t leave knowing there will be another girl taken, like the one he took last. I want to help you and your family stop him.”
A common goal. Yes. I can work with that.
“Thank you.”
CHAPTER TEN
I’ll catch you if you fall.
Cara remembered Darian’s promise when he stood under her on the mountain. His words warmed her and embarrassed her at the same time as she thought on them.
The way I’ve been behaving was all based on what I thought I knew. I don’t know anything.
They were on their way back down the mountain, the shifter Kate walking with them. Cara followed Darian glad to let him take the lead. It gave her the chance to think. For one thing, Cara realized she had to stop thinking of Darian and his pack as blood thirsty creatures.
It wasn’t just that Darian showed her patience far beyond what was offered by her father. The fact was, Cara was bitten and infected with the mutation. She was a shifter and not only did she still feel emotion and have comp
lex thoughts, she had her eyes opened as though even her mind was trapped in shadow before she’d left Aldrich town.
“I have a question,” she said after accepting that she had a lot to learn.
“A question for me?” Darian asked not looking back in her direction.
Cara licked her lips realizing too late that she was going to come off sounding stupid with her basic questions. She glanced back at Kate and hoped the woman wouldn’t think less of her.
When she looked forward again she ran right into Darian, who’d stopped walking and turned back when she didn’t ask her question. His arms came around her immediately, steadying her with ease.
The warmth of Darian’s arms around her, was comforting.
Is this what it’s supposed to feel like to have family?
Looking up at him she tried to read in his expression if he felt anything unusual. His expression didn’t tell her anything at all.
“You had a question?” He removed his arms from around her.
“Yes. I know it’s going to be the first of many to come. I’m realizing there is a lot that I don’t know.”
Darian’s golden eyes widened as he looked at her.
I’ve already said something wrong?
“Why are you looking at me like that? Did I say the wrong thing?”
“No,” Darian answered. His eyes remained widened though as he turned and started walking again. Cara walked along-side him so she could see he still wore the surprised expression. “Ask your question.”
Cara realized she was staring at him and averted her gaze from his masculine profile. “When I turn or shift, is it going to hurt?”
“Yes.”
She exhaled, figuring it would but hoped she was wrong. “Will I have control over when I shift or how much I shift?”
“The first time will not be your choice. After that, you will learn to control when you shift.”
“Will I be violent when I’m a wolf?”
“When you were bitten, and the mutation was added into your blood stream it didn’t only change your abilities,” Kate said. She patted Cara gently on the back.
More physical contact. Good but not the same feeling as the one I feel from Darian. I wonder why?
“Life is a gift, Cara. There are many souls waiting for the right to a body. The mutation gene opens your body up to accept an additional host.”
“What?” Cara stopped walking. “You’re saying another spirit will occupy my body? That isn’t logical. I don’t know if I believe in the existence of spirits at all.”
Kate nodded. “I felt very similar when Valor tried to explain this to me.”
“Will this spirit argue with me and take over my body?”
“It will be the spirit of your wolf. She will be a companion and friend. Her love for you will grow like your love for her.”
Cara blew out a long breath. “I don’t understand how I’ll grow to love a wolf that wants to kill.”
Darian half smiled. “Your spirit wolf is already with you, Cara. You haven’t gone on a murdering rampage yet.”
“I would notice if a wolf soul was in my body.”
“She’s there,” Kate agreed with Darian. “If she wasn’t, Darian’s position as Alpha would mean nothing to you. His commands would leave you unaffected.”
Cara frowned. “How will I know what feelings are mine and which are hers?”
“The pull and tug,” Kate smiled. “When you feel have an urge to do something you know isn’t from you, you’ll know it’s her. She’ll emerge to protect you and the people you love. Your strong emotions are hers, and some of hers will become yours.”
“Is my wolf in need of a lot of human contact?”
Kate shrugged. “I don’t know what you mean?”
“Darian said he wanted to help me grow accustomed to his touch when I first arrived here. Is that for my wolf?”
Kate smiled a toothy grin as she looked at Darian. “I imagine that has more to do with you being his destined mate.” She laughed and sprinted away.
Darian’s ears were red and so was the back of his neck.
“Destined mate?”
****
Darian could feel Cara’s eyes on him and knew that he had to try and explain it to her. She might be willing to stay and help kill Aldrich but that didn’t have anything to do with caring about him or the Rizer pack.
When she started asking questions with an open mind, Darian thought he was dreaming. Never once did he meet a human, turning shifter or not, who was willing to admit they were clueless about the realities of life.
Her admission made him take a look at himself. Darian was humbled as he realized she was stronger in character than himself. She was angry with herself for not helping a woman in need, and she recognized openly that her knowledge was lacking. Darian didn’t think once of the hunters he killed as victims. He saw them as extensions of Aldrich.
Cara accused him of stealing the sun from the people of Aldrich town. How could he not have considered citizens of the town as victims when he knew so well how manipulative Aldrich could be?
“You said before that you didn’t want to feel all those different things you were feeling. Was that because of the destined mate thing?” Cara asked.
I wish I had not said those things to you.
“Yes.” Darian stopped walking and faced Cara. “I meant what I said when I told you that I will never force you to do anything you don’t want to do. I also meant it when I told you that you’re free and that I won’t force you to stay.”
Cara nodded but didn’t say anything.
“Do you want me to explain what Destined Mates, means?”
“No. I believe I understand.” She started walking again.
She did not look afraid, happy, sad, it was as if he’d told her something as insignificant as his shoe size, and considering he didn’t wear shoes, it was an extremely insignificant piece of information. Out of everything Cara learned over the past five hours, shouldn’t learning that she was destined to be married to Darian rank high on the scale of priority questions?
Maybe she didn’t think she could care for him and since he’d promised not to force her into anything she wasn’t worried. Or perhaps, she felt something too?
Ridiculous. She would have said something if she was beginning to care for me.
Cara asked questions about training to fight so that she could be useful against Aldrich. Darian told her he would make sure she was trained even though he had no intension of allowing Cara anywhere near Aldrich.
Every time Darian saw the bruise on her face when he looked at her it made him want to find a way inside the wall to find Cara’s father. The way she’d defended his abuse as a symptom of being enclosed in the town meant it was not a random incident. It was an ongoing practice of his and it was why Cara didn’t understand what real love was.
If she did understand what it was, she didn’t know how to accept it.
“I will train very hard. You won’t have to protect me,” Cara was saying.
“I believe you will. This won’t change the fact that I will protect you.”
Cara sped up her pace so that she was walking beside him. Her blue eyes were wide. “Darian, I know you had to step in with Rafi but that was because I haven’t shifted yet. Once I have a sharp pair of teeth too it’ll be a fair fight.”
Darian smiled. He couldn’t help but admire her warrior spirit shining through. “I can imagine. Rafi will be sorry he ever tried to stand in your path.”
“He is already, isn’t he? It wasn’t any small lesson you taught him.”
Darian only nodded. If she knew how strong his protective instinct was in those moments when he discovered Rafi growling at her she would consider him a violent man and Darian didn’t want her to look at him and see any similarities to her father or Aldrich.
When they returned home, the pack welcomed her as they should have in the beginning. She’d won them over with her bravery and of course that insane leap she’d
taken.
Determined to take things slow with Cara, Darian resisted the urges he had to touch her hand, or feel the texture of her short hair. He sat stoic at her side through dinner. When her leg brushed against his and his mind turned to showing her just how good it could feel to allow him to touch her, he kept it to himself.
After dinner most of the pack was in need of a run. Darian needed the exercise more than the rest of the pack. He knew that when he returned Cara would be sharing his room. It would be a long night of smelling her sweet scent and looking at a beautiful woman, who’d taught him more about himself in a few short hours than he’d learned in a lifetime before her.
“I will stay with her,” Ian offered before Darian could ask. “We can all feel the energy you’re putting out there, if you don’t go run some of it off, all the mated members of the pack will be reproducing like its mating season.”
“Thanks, Ian,” Darian smiled. “Protect her.”
“I will.” Ian, his ice blue eyes solemn.
Darian slapped Ian’s wide back muscular back and returned to Cara’s side. Kate was telling Cara where to find the spare clothes kept for new members of the pack and as replacements. Darian waited until Kate finished before he spoke. “Ian is going to stay with you.”
“Where are you going? Are you going after Aldrich?”
“No, not unless he dares to leave the protection of the wall. We will be running the perimeters to make sure there are no hunters looking to attack.”
Cara nodded, lowering her gaze.
“I will give them every chance to run away,” Darian promised ignoring the way the pack looked at him. He would explain to them what Cara taught him and knew they would understand.
“You will?” Her smile and the light in her blue eyes made him ache with the need to kiss her. Darian inclined his head, too afraid of what he might say if he spoke at the moment.
No doubt something ridiculous would spill out of his mouth in an attempt to win Cara’s heart. There was nothing he could say that would change the fact that he stalked her and bit her.
Love Beyond the wall (A Rizer Pack Shifter Series Book 1) Page 6