His gaze was intense, and his eyes never left mine. “I know exactly what I want.”
“And that is?” I tapped the pen against the order pad that I never wrote in. This game was irritating me.
He grinned. “A glass of water please. Also, my name is Alister, not sir.”
“Coming right up, sir.” I spun around and headed to the bar.
Green eyes had a name. Alister. The word reverberated through my mind as I tried to push it away. All monsters have names.
I took my time filling the glass before taking it over to him. As I silently placed it on the table, he laid his hand on top of mine saying, “Thank you.”
The glass dropped clumsily, and liquid sloshed over the side. Electricity shot up my arm and tingled down my back. My breathing quickened. I turned to him as he jerked his hand away. His face mirrored the confusion that I felt. A mask of humor quickly replaced the shock.
“I didn’t mean to frighten you,” he said. “You look like a deer in the headlights right now.”
The deer reference caused me to grind my teeth. “What did you just do to me?”
“You felt that too,” he nodded. “I honestly don’t know what that was, but I’d like to find out.”
“Don’t ever do it again.” I stared him down and his eyes lit up. “Did you need anything else, sir?”
“I think that’s all for now, deer.” I cringed as he said the word. “I’d just like to sit here for a while if you don’t mind.” I shrugged and left to go check on my other customers.
He stayed there for the remainder of the evening. I could feel his eyes on me wherever I went. He never touched his water, so I had no need to go back to refill it. During a pause in the music, I heard the spirit scream and I involuntarily flinched. The song picked up tempo and her voice disappeared in the notes. I turned to see Alister still watching me intently. His brow was furrowed.
The clock read thirty minutes till closing. I sighed loudly as I walked over to see if he wanted anything for last call.
“We’re closing up soon. Do you need anything else before you go?”
“You haven’t been back to check on me all night.” His green eyes gleamed with mischief. “Customer service here is awful.”
“You’re welcome to find another place to not drink your water,” I offered. I was too tired to feel afraid anymore. “Want anything before I go home?”
“Could I walk you home?” His eyebrows raised making him look almost vulnerable. “At least to the portal, I mean.”
From the corner of my eye, I saw Fergus marching across the room, no doubt coming to my rescue again. The conversation from earlier rose in my mind and I felt irritated. Not with the monster at the table, but with the man who I was sure was hiding something.
“Sure,” I said, still staring at Fergus who moved between Alister and me.
“Is there a problem here?” Fergus asked him.
“No problem,” I said. “Alister just offered to walk me to the portal. That’s not a problem for you, is it?” I saw the muscles of Fergus’ shoulders tighten. “Meet me in the hall in twenty minutes.” I walked back to the employee lounge.
Fergus grabbed my elbow, catching me before I opened the door. I felt the touch, but it was nothing like the electric shock at the table.
“This isn’t a good idea,” Fergus whispered into my ear.
I pushed his hand off me and stared into his soft brown eyes. “That’s for me to decide, not you.” He put his tongue in his cheek as he slowly walked away.
Yes, I know I make some stupid decision sometimes.
*
“It’s not that long of a walk.” I joined Alister in the hall. Worry crossed the girls’ faces as I waved them ahead of me. “No one here likes the customers that much,” I reassured him. “Don’t take it personally.”
“I’ll try not to,” Alister said. “So, what is the deal with the blond guy? Are you seeing each other?”
“No.” I picked up the speed as we walked. “I barely know him.”
“Ah. Are you using me to rile him up for some reason?” He genuinely looked interested in talking so I slowed down a bit.
“It’s not that. Well, maybe it is. I’m angry with him for not being honest about something.” I was struggling to put words to the situation. I needed more time to think it through.
“This is new,” Alister grinned. “I don’t think I’ve ever been used by a girl before.”
“That might make me feel bad if you weren’t a serial killer. Because of that, you probably deserve it.” I stopped walking to look him in the eye. He burst into laughter.
“What did you just call me?” he asked after he caught his breath. “A killer. A monster. Something evil.” I continued moving through the in between.
His face was stone when he caught up to me. “I may not be a good person, but I have never intentionally hurt someone who didn’t deserve it.”
“Whatever you have to tell yourself so that you can go to sleep at night.” I slapped my forearm against the panel. Alister stood with a half grin on his face as the darkness pulled me through the void.
Chapter 15
∞
After we ate breakfast, I scooped the remainder of the powdered egg and spam casserole into plastic cups. Then I shoved them into my bag while Genie was in the shower.
“I’ll be back,” I yelled to her as I ran out the door.
“Don’t be long,” Genie called from the bathroom. “Craton is coming over for dinner tonight. We need to clean.”
I groaned as I raced down the steps. Playing hostess to Genie’s boyfriend and then partying in the realm didn’t sound like a great way to spend my weekend off. I wanted to scour Vorie’s library for books on spirits, but that would have to wait for a few days now. Of course, Genie would make her celebration a two-day event.
The air was getting warmer and I didn’t need my hoodie anymore. Not like it ever got that cold where I lived, winter was sweater weather. I’d read that Idaho had blistering cold winters with snow. Real winter and real snow, those concepts were as foreign to me as how people could live the rest of their lives in the realm on purpose.
I crossed the dirty street to where the Can’t Commits sat by the portal door. The woman was sitting up on her own and she had color in her cheeks. Two other bodies, an old man and another woman, lay moaning on the sidewalk beside her.
“Why are you doing this?” she asked as she took the cup from my hand.
I was tired of answering that question. “Because I can’t leave you here to die.” I propped the old man up against the wall and spooned some food into his mouth. His eyes were watering with gratitude as he forced himself to swallow.
“Maybe you should just leave us here. We aren’t worth the bodies we are wasting,” the woman spoke between bites.
Oh great, another self-loathing one. I rolled my eyes.
“Listen. I’ve fed hundreds of you throughout my life. I get it. You’re miserable and you can’t make up your mind on whether to leave this world behind or not. You hate yourself for going, but you hate being here. I’m not telling you to decide, but I’m feeding your body, so it still has a chance of living.” I handed her a bottle of water.
“Yeah, that pretty much sums me up,” the woman smirked as she took off the cap. “What’s his story then?” She nodded at the man as I got him to take another bite.
“This gentleman’s wife probably already crossed over to the realm. He spends his time there visiting her, but pure animalistic survival instinct brings him back each time.”
“Wow, you have seen a lot of us.” The woman’s face registered her surprise.
“I have.” The man took small sips of the water. I neglected to mention that I had spoken with him a few months ago so I already knew his story.
“That still doesn’t explain why you are doing this,” the woman sighed. “There’s nothing left for any of us in the world anymore unless you are one of the lucky few that have a job.”
; “I hate hearing that.” My eyes burned with tears and I blinked them away. “I’m here. This is my home. We could all work together to make this world better. You are all just too lazy to actually live a real life.”
“I’m sorry.” The woman pulled her knees to her chest. “I didn’t mean to upset you. Thank you for the food.”
“What’s your name?” I asked softly. There was no use in getting worked up over it.
“Ruth,” she answered.
“Well it’s nice to meet you Ruth. I’m hoping you’d like to stay.” She smiled warmly at me and I had to smile back. Maybe it would work this time, I thought. Maybe someone would listen.
I lifted the other woman by her armpits and leaned her up next to the man. Her breath was weak, and I was hoping she’d take some food. I’d dealt with a few of them who were too far gone. I didn’t want to do that again.
As I reached into my bag to grab another cup, I saw Fergus leaning against the doorframe near the portal like he had been there for a while watching. My breath caught in my chest and I instantly jumped to my feet.
“What the hell are you doing here?” I looked around the empty streets planning a route to escape.
“I didn’t mean to scare you.” Worry creased his brow. “I just didn’t want to interrupt you while you were busy.”
I glared at him. “No. What are you doing here at my portal?”
“I wanted to talk to you, so I bought a ticket here,” Fergus shrugged.
“I never told you where I lived.” I took a step backwards as he moved away from the portal.
“Yes, you did.” Fergus smiled at me like I was crazy. “You said you lived in Los Angeles.”
I racked my brain and couldn’t remember ever saying that to him. “I don’t think I did. Even so, L.A. is huge. How did you come through this one portal?”
“Luck I guess.” Fergus continued to move forward as I kept stepping back. “Fawn, I came all the way over here to talk with you and you are acting weird about it. I thought we were friends.”
“You randomly showed up at my portal without warning and I know you lied to me about what is going on at the club.” My words were dripping in sarcasm. “That would make anyone feel weird.”
“Are you okay?” Ruth asked me from her seat on the ground.
“I’m fine. Or I will be, once this jerk tells me what he wants.”
Fergus looked as if I’d slapped him across the face and my defenses softened. “I came here to explain everything. Can we go somewhere to talk?” He glanced down at Ruth. “Alone?”
Curiosity won. I handed the last cup to Ruth and asked her to feed the woman. After grabbing my bag, I headed across the street to the old bus stop.
“You’re not going to show me where you live?” Fergus asked. I shook my head. It was surreal having someone you met in the realm standing on your street. At least I had the advantage of knowing where to run.
“Have you never bought a ticket to go somewhere else?” He sat down next to me on the bench. I thought about the guy I’d dated for a little while in the realm at my last job. We had plans to meet in Mexico one time, but we didn’t end up going. He turned eighteen and I never heard from him again.
“Never had a reason to. It’s a waste of credits.” I stared hard into his eyes. “You came here to talk, so talk.”
“You’re upset with me. I don’t want you to be upset. I’m not sure what I did.” Fergus waited for me to answer. When I didn’t fall for the trap, he continued, “Is it because I said the word “we” when talking about the spirit thing?”
“Spirit thing?” I could feel my outrage spiking. “There is literally the soul of a tortured woman stuck in that horrible club and you are dismissing it as a simple spirit thing. That isn’t the only issue though, there is something you aren’t telling me. Did you have some part in building The Nocere?”
“Why would you think that?” His voice was calm and guarded.
“Because you flat out said “we didn’t know this would happen”. It doesn’t make sense. What do you even do there?” My face was hot, and my foot tapped uncontrollably on the sidewalk. Something was wrong about this whole situation, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. It was pissing me off.
“I told you,” he said calmly, infuriating me further. “I work in maintenance. I’ve been there since the beginning and we, me and the other maintenance guys, were told what was going to happen with the spirits coming in. We didn’t know they would stay.”
“That doesn’t add up either. What other maintenance guys? I’ve never seen any. In fact, I’ve never seen anyone other than contractors or architects work on holding the buildings in place. And another thing…” I knew I was rambling, but I couldn’t stop. “How you crushed that manifestation with your bare hands. I’ve never seen anyone with that kind of power. I know you’re lying about something.”
“Fawn, please calm down.” Fergus gently lifted my hand and rubbed his fingers over the top. He looked like such a normal guy just sitting on a bench. I suddenly felt irrational.
“You’re upset. The sound of the woman’s screams affected you deeply. I don’t want anything to bother you and I’m doing my best to fix the situation.”
“Why do you keep saying that?” I pulled my hand out of his. “I never asked you to worry about me and I don’t need you to do it either. I barely even know you.”
The smile faded from his face. “You are so precious. Don’t you know that? How real you are and how much you care about life, those are things no one sees anymore. I don’t want anything bad to ever happen to you and I want to be a part of your life.”
“Let me ask you this.” I crossed my arms over my chest. “Are you really here because someone else walked me to the portal last night?”
The muscles in his jaw clenched and I had my answer before he spoke. “That was foolish of you to do. I wish it wouldn’t happen again.”
“Fawn!” I heard the screaming of my name from across the street. Genie was running up as fast as her heels would click-clack her across the pavement.
Shit.
“Who do we have here?” she gushed as Fergus stood up to greet her. I hadn’t noticed he was wearing frayed jeans and flipflops until just this moment. It was odd seeing him dressed that way.
“Fergus,” he said gently as he took her outstretched hand. “And you are?”
“I’m Genie. Fawn’s best friend,” she giggled as she pulled him in for a hug, mouthing the words “oh my god, he’s hot” to me behind his back. She pulled away before I could say anything.
“Are you coming to dinner tonight?” She’d already looped an arm through his and was dragging him across the street.
“I don’t have anything else to do,” he smiled down at her. Genie could be charming when she wanted to be, but right then I wanted to kick her in the knee.
“Actually, Fergus was just leaving.” She didn’t get the hint laced through my tone.
He stopped walking and looked in my direction. “Fawn’s right,” he sighed. “I should go.”
“Nonsense.” Genie pulled harder on his arm. “Whatever is going on between the two of you, let it go. We are going to have fun tonight.”
I guess she did get the hint, she just doesn’t care, I mumbled to myself as I trailed behind them. Fergus looked at me helplessly and I smiled. He did look cute as my polka dot clad, pineapple haired friend dragged him into my house.
Chapter 16
∞
“You relax here.” Genie pushed Fergus onto the couch. “Fawn and I have some work to do.”
I kept him in my line of sight as I began to scrub the kitchen floor. He browsed through my books on the coffee table. When he picked up my gardening book, I ran across the living room and ripped it from his hands.
“Why can’t I see that?” he asked playfully.
“No reason.” I tossed it into my bedroom and closed the door.
When we finished cleaning, Genie jumped in the shower first.
“Is
there going to be any hot water left?” Lane asked as he walked into the house.
“Probably not,” I laughed as I grabbed my towel and raced past him toward the bathroom. I wasn’t cold hearted though, I left enough for him to rinse quickly. I dried off in my room, then put on a pair of ripped jeans and lacy white tank top. My hair was still wet, so I pulled it up into a loose bun. Satisfied with my attempt to dress up, I made my way to the kitchen to start making dinner. Fergus sat so quietly on the couch that I almost forgot he was there.
“Can I help you?” Fergus leaned his arms across the countertop.
“No.”
“Fawn likes to cook alone.” Lane clapped Fergus on the back. “It’s another one of her quirky habits.” I turned on my earbuds to block out their conversation, letting the music roll across my skin instead.
When the tuna noodle casserole was finished baking, I put the cherry cobbler in the oven. Genie came up behind me to check on the food. She was wearing a tight tunic black dress with strappy heels that tied up with ribbons to her thighs. Her hair bounced perfectly in soft wavy curls and her lips were covered in a shocking red glaze.
I looked down at my own outfit and shrugged. I’d been around Genie long enough to forget the feeling of being underdressed. Her eyes lit up and I turned off the music to hear the knocking on the door.
“I’ll get it,” I said, giving her a horrible wink. She laughed as I quickly tied an apron around her waist. Craton was standing at the door with a dozen roses.
“For me?” I put my hand over my heart in mock surprise.
“No, they are for…” His voice trailed off as he looked past me into the open room.
“I’m just kidding. She is in the kitchen.” Craton smiled his impish smile and followed me through the flat. Genie was pulling the cobbler out of the oven just as we approached.
“It smells wonderful.” Craton gazed at Genie with adoring eyes. Genie set the tray on a hotplate and untied the apron.
“Those are beautiful honey. Let me get a vase.” She rummaged in the cabinets until she found the crystal jar. Craton followed her across the room as she arranged the bouquet. I quietly slipped the cobbler back into the oven. It wasn’t finished baking.
The Nocere: A Haunting Dystopian Tale Book 1 Page 8