You’re the Reason

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You’re the Reason Page 16

by J. Nathan


  I nodded. “Let’s get this over with.”

  The nurse walked out into the hall.

  Valerie looked to me. “Did you know he was a cop?”

  I shook my head. “I’m as shocked as you.”

  A uniformed police officer stepped through the door. I breathed a sigh of relief. Then, Chase in jeans and a black Henley stepped into the doorway and followed him into the room.

  My eyes dropped away, suddenly realizing where he’d been all the times he’d disappeared. He’d been meeting up with his unit. He had this whole other life I had no knowledge of. Oh my God. Did he have a girlfriend? A wife? Bile inched up the back of my throat and I jumped to my feet. “I’ll be back,” I mumbled to Valerie as I scurried out of the room with my eyes on the floor.

  I stepped into the hallway and closed my eyes, dragging in deep breaths.

  “You okay, honey?” a nurse asked.

  I nodded. “I’m fine.” But I wasn’t. Not even close. Chase hadn’t tried to call. He hadn’t tried to explain. It was clear I’d been part of the job. Part of the elaborate farce. And now he had no use for me.

  Despite my broken heart, I needed to be there for Valerie. So, pulling in a breath and steeling my features, I walked back into the room.

  All eyes shifted to me, but I kept mine on Valerie as I dropped back down into the chair.

  “So, you didn’t see him slip anything into your drink?” the officer asked.

  Valerie shook her head.

  “But he gave you an open container?” Chase asked.

  She nodded.

  “How soon after did you start feeling groggy?” Chase asked.

  “Almost immediately because I hadn’t had anything to drink up to that point. Then, my pulse started to race. I felt fidgety and sweaty. I knew something wasn’t right, so I called Sophia.” She looked to me. “Thank God she showed up when she did.”

  I reached over and took her hand, holding it between mine.

  “Has this ever happened to you before at Kappa Sigma?” the officer asked.

  Valerie shook her head. “But I have heard other girls say they woke in guys’ beds with no recollection of how they got there. They just thought they were wasted. But now I don’t know.”

  Chase shook his head and I could see he was angry. “I’m sorry I let this happen,” he said. “If I’d had solid proof sooner, my unit could’ve moved in and taken him down before you got caught up in his twisted game,” he explained.

  Valerie shook her head. “You got him now.”

  “If you remember anything else that might help us bring more charges against him, please don’t hesitate to call me or Officer Shaw,” the police officer said, placing his card down on the table beside Valerie’s bed.

  Shaw? Chase’s last name was Shaw? Was his first name even Chase?

  They turned and walked toward the door. The officer exited, but Chase stopped.

  My chest tightened around my racing heart.

  He glanced over his shoulder at Valerie. “I’m glad you’re all right.” He turned and walked out of the room without even looking my way.

  Valerie squeezed my hand. “Don’t cry.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “You’re not.”

  “You’re in the hospital. I’m going to be okay.”

  “You two need to talk,” she said.

  “His last name’s Shaw. He’s a cop. I didn’t know either of those things.” I closed my eyes. “He’s probably married with kids. No wonder why he wouldn’t sleep with me.” I dropped my face into my palms. “This was his job. I was just part of his job.”

  Valerie remained silent for a long time so I peeked up to be sure she was okay. She stared at me, the dark circles around her eyes reminding me of the horrific night she’d had and what could’ve gone wrong if I hadn’t gotten to her in time. “I don’t believe you were just part of his job. I saw him with you. He was different. He had me decorate your room with candles for God’s sake. You don’t do romantic stuff like that if you’re faking it.”

  I shook my head, tears stinging my eyes. “This isn’t really helping.”

  She flashed a sad smile. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I’m sorry.”

  We both laughed, but it didn’t feel like real laughter as we considered the sad situations we were both in at that moment.

  But we were strong.

  And, we had each other.

  We’d move past this.

  CHAPTER THIRTY

  I sat alone in the coffee shop on Friday afternoon, trying to ignore the hollow in my chest that had been there since Saturday night. I wrote my History through Film paper alone. Alone because my partner was no longer a student at Crestwood. Alone because my partner lied to me about everything. Alone because my partner didn’t care enough about me as a human being to even talk to me after deceiving me.

  Some girls at a nearby table spoke in whispers. I could’ve sworn I heard them say something about the campus NARC. And when my eyes shifted to them, they lowered their voices even more.

  My stomach turned over, my thoughts never straying far from the grand deception I had my very own front row seat to. What was it going to take to move on?

  “Well, looks like neither of us ended up with him,” Chantel said, stepping up to my table.

  “Instead of gloating, I’d think you’d be asking how Valerie is? You know Valerie. Your sorority sister.”

  She rolled her eyes. “It’s not like it’s the first time she ended up in someone’s bed.”

  “Wow. If that’s how you talk about your friends, I can only imagine how you talk about me.”

  She scoffed. “I don’t.”

  I knew that was a lie. She wasn’t someone to let things go. She dwelled on them. She made people pay for them.

  And that’s when it hit me.

  The distance between her and Val. Their strained interactions. The fear she instilled in my usually confident and strong friend. “Oh. My. God.”

  “What?” she sneered.

  “Did you set her up?”

  “What?”

  “Did you have Ryan slip something in her drink? Was this more payback like the video?”

  She straightened her spine. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “I think you do. Jesus Christ. It’s all starting to make sense now.”

  “You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  “Oh, but I do.”

  When it hit her that I might actually know something, her eyes narrowed and her face contorted into something cold and calculating. “You have no idea who you’re dealing with.”

  “You’re wrong about that too. I do. And I’m not scared of you.”

  “You should be.” She spun around and walked out, the clicking of her heels drumming in my head like my own pulse.

  I gathered my things. How had I not seen it before now? I left the coffee house and jogged back to the dorm.

  I knew why they didn’t get along.

  I knew Valerie’s secret.

  And something needed to be done about it.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

  My heart had been racing. But when the knock on the door came, it became a jackhammer in my chest. I glanced over at Valerie who sat on my bed, her hands wringing nervously in front of her. She nodded her permission.

  I walked to the door, grasped hold of the knob, and hesitated. You got this. I pulled in a breath then pulled open the door. Chase stood there in jeans and a dark shirt, his hands buried in his pockets. I said nothing, just stepped back so he could enter.

  He moved past me, the woodsy crisp scent of his cologne wafting by.

  I fought to retain my composure and not let the recollections of our times together flood my brain.

  “How’re you doing, Valerie?” he asked.

  She nodded. “I’ve been better.”

  He leaned against my desk and crossed his arms, like he had so many times before. Only, this time felt different. He felt like a stra
nger occupying my space.

  I looked to Valerie. “Do you want me to leave you guys alone?”

  She shook her head. “Please stay.”

  For a split second, Chase glanced to me before his eyes moved back to Valerie. “So, why’d you need me to come here?”

  She looked to me as I sat down on the edge of Chantel’s bed, nodding my support.

  “I know what happened to Sydney Lane.”

  His mouth parted. “You do?”

  She nodded. “But if I tell you, I need to know what’s going to happen to me for not telling what I knew from the beginning.”

  “Well, it depends on your part in it.”

  “I didn’t do it,” she said.

  “I’m not saying that. I’m saying if you were an accomplice in any way, there will be repercussions. If you just failed to divulge what you knew, you could be looking at a Class A misdemeanor.”

  She glanced to me, fear heavy in her eyes.

  “Val, you want to do this. For you, for Sydney, for Sydney’s family,” I reminded her. “Officer Shaw will make sure that you’re shown leniency for cooperating with the police.” I glared at Chase. “Right, Officer Shaw?”

  He winced at the tone of my voice and use of his real name. Then he nodded. “I’ll do whatever I can,” he assured her.

  She said nothing, considering what he’d said and what she was about to do.

  “The entire time I was here, I couldn’t get a lead,” Chase said, as if totally thrown off kilter that Valerie had the information he needed all along. “Sydney’s parents were sure the Alpha Phis had something to do with her death. They needed someone who could get close.”

  “Oh my God. Chantel,” I said, not meaning to say it out loud. But it finally made sense why he couldn’t completely cut ties with her.

  He nodded regrettably, before looking back to Valerie. “You’d be helping this case tremendously, Valerie.”

  She nodded, and her words came slowly as she stared at everything but Chase and me. “Sophia was right about the Alpha Phis taking their pledges up to the roof for initiation. But it’s not done at Salvador Hall and it’s not done as a group. It’s done one at a time right up on this roof where most of the pledges live. They undress and stand on the ledge of the roof. Then, they recite the names of every chapter president who came before them.” Tears dropped from Valerie’s eyes and trailed down her cheeks. “Sydney was scared of heights. I remember her begging Chantel not to make her go up there, but Chantel wants things done her way. And she doesn’t like when people don’t go along with her ways.” Valerie wiped her nose with the sleeve of her shirt. “She forced Sydney up there, threatening to not make her a sister if she failed this final task.”

  A tear trailed down my cheek, the vision of the night feeling so real in my mind.

  “Sydney’s legs were shaking so badly as she stood up there. I went to try to help her. I was gonna hold her hand to steady her. But Chantel screamed at me to step back. She must’ve startled Sydney because…” Valerie swallowed, her tears falling freely now. “…she fell.” She closed her eyes tightly. “I can still hear her screams in my nightmares.”

  I pushed away the tears that fell from my own eyes.

  “Why didn’t you call for help?” Chase asked.

  “I tried. But Chantel grabbed my phone. She said we’d go to jail. She said we’d never see the light of day. I didn’t believe her. I knew the truth would set us free. But she was worried about herself.”

  I shook my head, everything between Chantel and Valerie’s exchanges making so much sense now.

  “Chantel’s father’s a lawyer,” Valerie explained. “So, she called him. He told her to get off the roof and play dumb. I was the only one standing in her way. I was the wildcard who could ruin her at any time because, unlike her, I had a conscience. And she knew it. She threatened to release the video of me hazing pledges, so I’d get kicked out of school—even though she’s the one who made me do it. She used the secret against me, holding it over me whenever she could. I didn’t know what to do. I had no one to talk to. I was so scared.”

  “Then she released the video anyway,” Chase said.

  Valerie nodded. “She wanted to keep me quiet. I think she was getting scared I’d crack.”

  Chase’s breath whooshed through his lips. “This was not what I was expecting.”

  “Will I be arrested?” she asked, her eyes wild and scared.

  “It’s your word against hers. And you’re right. Her father’s a lawyer. One of the best in Texas. She could beat this charge if her story’s plausible. You might not. You could be their scapegoat.”

  Valerie buried her face in her palms.

  I rushed over and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her into my side. “You were so brave to tell the truth. You did the right thing. Chantel doesn’t have this hanging over you anymore. You’re free.”

  “I shouldn’t have waited. I owed it to Sydney. And I owed it to her parents.”

  An image of Sydney’s mom flashed in my mind’s eye. She’d known her daughter. And she’d known her daughter would never harm herself. She’d been right. I couldn’t wait for her to learn the truth.

  “We can’t tell anyone,” Chase said.

  Valerie and I both looked to him with our brows drawn. “Why not?”

  “We need her confession,” he said.

  “She’ll never confess,” Valerie said.

  “Don’t be so sure,” he said.

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  Valerie walked Chase to the door a short time later. “Thank you for not arresting me.”

  He nodded.

  “Do you mind waiting a minute? I’ve just gotta grab something in my room.” She hurried out the door before he could even respond.

  The door closed behind her, leaving Chase and me alone and in complete silence. I think we both knew she wasn’t coming back.

  He moved toward my desk and leaned against it while I remained seated on my bed.

  My pulse quickened, the muffled sound filling my ears. Could he hear it? Because it’s all I could hear.

  “So?” I said, needing to break the uncomfortable silence.

  “So,” he said.

  “You’re a cop.” I just needed to say it so my brain could finally wrap itself around the knowledge.

  “I am.”

  “Are you married?” I asked.

  He buried his hands in his front pockets and shook his head.

  “Do you have a girlfriend?”

  He shook his head.

  “Was I just part of the job?” I asked.

  His eyes met mine. “It’s complicated.”

  “I can keep up.”

  He closed his eyes for a long moment. “This was only my second big assignment. I’m young, right out of the academy, and they knew I could pass for a college student. Shoot. If I didn’t go to the academy, I’d still be in college.” He dragged his fingers through his hair the way he always did when he was conflicted. “I never expected to meet a girl who I’d actually have feelings for. This was supposed to be a job. A three-month job. But, when the trail ran dry on Sydney last year, they realized I might still be useful on campus since they had a growing drug problem the dean wanted taken care of. So, they sent me back this semester. I wasn’t even supposed to be here. I wasn’t even supposed to meet you.”

  “But you did.”

  He nodded.

  “And you can’t just pretend you didn’t.”

  “I know,” he said, seemingly pained by the notion.

  “So, stop being an asshole and talk to me.”

  “What do you want to hear?”

  “The truth.”

  He walked over and sat beside me. The dipping of the mattress pulled me closer to him, but I righted myself and kept my distance. “My feelings for you were real, Soph.”

  Tears pricked my eyes. I don’t know what I expected him to say, but that wasn’t it. “Were real?”

  He grabbed my hands and held them. “Ar
e real.”

  “You lied.”

  “I had to. You’ve gotta know that.”

  “You haven’t called.”

  “I didn’t think you wanted me to,” he said, his eyes riveting between mine, looking for the slightest indication of how I truly felt. “Did you?”

  I was so damned confused. So much had happened. So much deception. So much back and forth. “I need to know what was real and what wasn’t.”

  “My last name and me ever wanting anything to do with Chantel. Those were lies.”

  I scoffed. “Thank God.”

  “The truth? There’s a lot more of that. I am from Houston but I have my own apartment which is so much better than that awful frat house.”

  “Is that where you took off to when you disappeared?”

  “Yeah. Those were mandatory training sessions and briefings I had to attend.”

  I nodded, understanding he had responsibilities.

  “I did play football growing up. I even played my first two years in college before I changed paths and went to the police academy.” He leveled me with his eyes. “I don’t have a girlfriend or wife. I don’t even have a dog. Chase is my real name. And I’ve got a lot of groveling to do to win back the reason I’m about to finally crack this case. The reason I loved getting up in the morning and attending classes I didn’t even need. The reason I still smile just thinking about our time together.”

  My eyes lowered to our conjoined hands. “It’s not gonna be easy.”

  “Nothing worth having ever is.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-THREE

  Valerie and I sat at a table in the dining hall. Her normally styled hair, though concealed by the hood of her dark hoodie, hadn’t been washed in days, and dark circles plagued her eyes.

  “Val, you need to eat,” I said.

  She shook her head, sitting across from me with crossed arms, staring off into space.

  “This isn’t healthy.”

  She said nothing.

  “Hey, Val,” Tina said as she passed by our table.

  Valerie didn’t acknowledge her roommate as she continued to stare off into space.

  Tina glanced to me with worried eyes, knowing as I did, that Val had been skipping all her classes for days.

 

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