No End to Love

by Roberta Capizzi

  “I’ll talk to them.” Ellie’s tone was calm, patient, as if she was dealing with one of her kids. “I’ll talk to Mrs. Saunders and make sure you can see Sammy as often as possible. We’ll figure something out, I promise. Please, don’t make things worse.”

  There was a slightly panicked edge to Ellie’s voice now, and Adam wished he could do something to get the guy’s hands off her. He wanted to take her in his arms, kiss her and forget everything.

  “Shut up! You.” He shifted his attention from Ellie to Adam, nodding at him. “Get my son here now, or I swear I’ll shoot her.”

  Adam took a fortifying breath. Held it in. Then he let it out with the words he spoke through gritted teeth. “If you so much as raise that gun toward her, you’re dead. And I mean it.”

  The guy scoffed. He scoffed! Adam tried, and failed, to rein in his temper. His Glock was aimed at the man’s chest, all he had to do was twitch his index finger on the trigger, and it would all be over. But even though he’d told himself he’d learned from his past mistakes, he still didn’t like the idea of killing another human being.

  “How about I raise it toward you, then?”

  The hand holding the gun went up. Adam’s instinct for self-preservation kicked in. He took his aim, and going against his initial intentions, he pulled the trigger.

  Two gunshots echoed in the room. Adam stared at the man falling backwards to the ground. Ellie’s scream reached his ears, as she ran toward him. It was then he felt the burning sting in his left shoulder. While warmth spread from his shoulder blade down his arm, a cold chill ran through him as he realized why he’d heard two shots.

  A second later, he crumpled to the floor.

  * * *

  Ellie couldn’t believe this was happening. In the three seconds it took her to reach Adam and take him into her arms, she realized her life would mean nothing without him and Sophie. Although at first she’d attached herself to the little girl just out of professional habit, just like she had to Sammy, it hadn’t been long before she’d understood she’d been lying to herself, to Charli, and even to Adam. She cared about the little girl because deep down she wished she were hers. And even though she’d known all along she shouldn’t be entertaining romantic thoughts about the father of one of her kids, she hadn’t been able to deny her feelings. She loved Adam, she loved Sophie—she wanted the whole package, Meatball included.

  Adam’s colleague had run in, checked on Sammy’s dad and called an ambulance, then went out to give them a minute alone while he waited for the paramedics. As she was crouched on the floor, with Adam’s head on her lap so he could breathe more easily, she thought she was just about to lose it all, before she’d even managed to graze with her fingertips that dream of a happy family she’d been having these past few weeks.

  “I’m sorry,” he said, breathing heavily. Ellie shushed him, blinking back the tears without success. “I was… I was a jerk the other night…”

  Ellie’s vision blurred and she shook her head. She opened her mouth to say something, to tell him she loved him and that she wasn’t mad at him, when the door burst open, and two paramedics rushed in, pushing a gurney. The male paramedic rushed to their side, while the female ran to check on the man lying on the floor only a few feet away.

  “He’s dead,” she said, before rushing to help her colleague with Adam. She put her hands on Ellie’s shoulders and pulled her back. “We’ll take it from here, Ellie. Move aside.”

  Ellie frowned at the woman, wondering how she knew her. Then she remembered she was the mother of one of the kids and grabbed her forearms.

  “Debra, please don’t let him die,” she whispered, choking on a sob. She didn’t care if the woman realized there was something between Ellie and Adam, nor if she went and told Dee and got Ellie fired. All she cared about was for them to save Adam—and save Ellie’s life as a consequence.

  “We’ll do our best, but we have to go to the hospital now,” Debra said, gently prying Ellie’s fingers from her own arms.

  Adam’s eyes fluttered open, and he stretched out his right arm from the gurney, reaching for Ellie. She stood up and took his hand.

  “Look after Sophie… She’ll need you…” he said, his voice barely audible. She bent to be closer to his face. “Tell her I love her… I’ll always… love her…”

  What was he saying? “Adam, you’ll tell her yourself. You’ll be all right,” she said, even as fat tears streaked her cheeks. His eyes rolled back, and she let out a gasp. Debra and the other paramedic pushed the gurney out of the room and rushed toward the exit, where the ambulance was waiting.

  Her legs turned to jelly, and she wanted to crumple to the floor, curl up in a ball and cry until there were no tears left, until she couldn’t breathe. Instead, as soon as Sophie’s screams calling her daddy reached her ears, she forced herself to run outside and make good on what Adam had asked her to do. Sophie needed her right now, and in a way, Ellie needed Sophie, too.

  “Daddy, Daddy!” Sophie was screaming at the top of her lungs, running after the gurney, with Dee in tow. Cayden came running from the fire truck and reached for her a second before Ellie. Sophie kicked and wriggled, while he tried to calm her.

  “Sophie, it’s okay, I’m here,” Ellie said, taking her tiny hand. Sophie looked up and flung herself at her, wrapping her arms around Ellie’s legs.

  “I don’t want Daddy to go to heaven wif Mommy!” she said through the sobs and wails. Ellie picked her up and held her to her chest, stroking her soft curls.

  “He’s not going anywhere, sweetie. He’d never leave you.” The little girl’s desperate sobs only served to increase the raw pain inside her heart, spreading through her chest and reaching down into her soul. “We’ll go see him at the hospital, so when he wakes up you’ll be there, okay?”

  Sophie nodded against Ellie’s chest and squeezed her tiny arms tighter around Ellie’s neck.

  “Let us give you a ride,” Cayden looked at Ellie and put a hand on Sophie’s back. “You can ride in the front seat next to me, and I’ll let you press the button for the siren. Wanna do that, princess?”

  Sophie looked up at him, with her bottom lip still trembling. Cayden smiled, stroking her back, and she nodded.

  “Come on, let’s go.” Cayden guided them to the fire truck, where he had a quick word with Nate. When he nodded, Cayden turned back to Ellie and motioned for them to get in, before getting behind the wheel himself.

  The ride to the hospital on the outskirts of Spring were the longest five minutes of Ellie’s life. Cayden and Nate did their best to keep Sophie’s mind off her dad’s condition, especially when they let her push the button and the siren started wailing. The giggle she let out warmed Ellie’s cold heart, bringing a little reprieve from the grief that tied it in knots.

  When they reached the hospital, Cayden guided Ellie through the corridors. His firefighter uniform and the fact he was family opened doors that would probably be closed for her, as she wasn’t related to Adam.

  Kean had been the first one to reach the hospital, since he’d been working on a house a block down when he’d gotten the call from Cayden. The frown that marred his beautiful, masculine face—so similar to Adam’s—softened when Sophie called out his name. He opened his arms and picked her up, lifting her in the air and making her giggle.

  Ellie wished her mind worked like that of a three-year-old. She wished she could forget all the bad things that had just happened, that riding in a fire truck would be enough to take her mind off the fact that Adam might not make it out of that operating room. Nate and Cayden had reassured Sophie that her dad would be okay soon, and once he woke up she could tell him she’d been in the firetruck and pushed the button for the siren. She’d been so excited, it had been the first thing she’d told Kean as soon as he’d picked her up.

  “Your daddy’s gonna be so jealous you rode in the fire truck. He always wanted to but never did.” Kean smiled at Sophie, but when his eyes landed on Ellie, they softened, and s
he could tell he was fighting tears. He took a step closer and reached for Ellie. She didn’t know whether this was ethical, whether gossip would spread, or whether Adam would have something to say about it, but at that moment she didn’t care. She closed the distance, and let Kean’s arm surround her.

  Holding Sophie on his right hip, he pulled Ellie to him, and she rested her cheek against his strong chest, letting tears flow. Kean’s embrace was warm and reassuring, and she welcomed the comfort he was offering, but it was nothing like Adam’s.

  At that very moment, with Kean’s heart beating under her ear and against her cheek, she realized how her mother must have felt the day Colonel Murray showed up on her doorstep bearing the awful news that her husband had been killed in action. As a suffocating feeling of dread slowly clogged her throat, Ellie finally understood why Amelia Hawthorne had slowly withered away, letting life seep out of her and eventually decided to put an end to her suffering by swallowing those pills.

  Ellie had promised herself she’d never get to the point where another person could take away her own will to live. But as she waited in that cold waiting room, surrounded by Adam’s family who’d arrived only a few minutes before, she knew deep down in her heart that if Adam didn’t make it out of that operating room, she’d never be able to pull herself out of the dark ravine she’d fallen into the moment the bullet had hit him.

  After three long years of resenting her mother for giving up on life and on her children, Ellie finally felt ready to let go of her anger and forgive her. Ellie had never truly known the meaning of true love, the kind that warmed your heart and burned your soul, until now—until she was on the verge of losing it. Now she knew what losing the person who owned your heart felt like, after having enjoyed the thrill of love for only a few short weeks.

  Minutes ticked by, each second dragging as she sat on a cold, hard plastic chair, waiting for someone to show up and tell them Adam was okay, that he was safe. In the three hours and forty-five minutes of excruciating wait, Ellie was welcomed into Adam’s family, even though she’d thought they would consider her responsible for Adam being there in the first place. If he hadn’t come in to rescue her, if she’d managed to talk Sammy’s father down, Adam wouldn’t be fighting for his life.

  His parents offered comfort and accepted hers in return. Lauren sat by her, held her hand and reassured her Adam would be okay. Even Jenna had hugged her as soon as she’d arrived and brought her coffee when she returned from the cafeteria where she’d taken Sophie to buy a hot chocolate.

  When the doctor showed up, wearing a pair of clean, light green scrubs and a worn-out expression on his face, Ellie shot to her feet, followed by everyone else in the room. In concise and comprehensible words, Doctor Lang informed them they’d removed the bullet, that it hadn’t damaged any organs, and he was positive Adam would recover quickly from the wound, as long as he rested and followed the medical instructions the doctor would provide.

  “I want to see my Daddy,” Sophie piped up, waking from her nap and pulling herself up straight in Kean’s arms. “When can I see my Daddy?”

  Doctor Lang smiled. “He’s just waking up, so he might be a little groggy,” he said, looking at Kean, who nodded in response. “But I think he’d like to see you. Just be careful you don’t hug him too hard yet, okay?”

  Sophie nodded and smiled. “Can Miss Ellie come, too? I fink Daddy wants to see her because he likes her.”

  Everyone in the room chuckled as Ellie’s cheeks heated. “I think maybe you should go with your Grammy. I can see him later.”

  “You go ahead, dear. Adam will be happy to see you and Sophie.” Enya Cavanagh rubbed Ellie’s shoulder and smiled. “We’ll say hello when he feels a little better. All I wanted was to know he’s okay.”

  Kean put Sophie on the floor and took a step back, smiling at Ellie. Sophie grabbed Ellie’s hand and pulled her out of the waiting room. “Come on, Miss Ellie. We’ve got to see Daddy!”

  Ellie followed Doctor Lang to Adam’s room and stopped outside when the doctor said he’d check on him first. Sophie pulled her by the hand, eager to walk in and see her daddy, and when the doctor came out a minute later, she dashed toward the door, stopping on the threshold as she looked inside.

  Ellie peeped into the room, and her heart skipped a beat when she saw him lying on the bed, the left side of his chest—his bare chest—wrapped in white bandages, and IV lines and other cables attached to his body.

  Only one thought crossed her mind at the vision: I love this wonderful man.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  “Daddy!” His little girl’s voice pierced through his foggy brain, and he smiled when Sophie rushed into his hospital room, running toward his bed. He sat up straighter, wincing a little but opening his arms all the same. All he wanted was to hug his daughter and celebrate the fact he wasn’t dead. That he hadn’t left his baby all alone.

  “Come here, baby girl.” He looked up from Sophie when movement at the door caught his eye. His face brightened up at the vision.

  “Hey.” He smiled when Ellie approached his bed and picked up Sophie.

  “Remember what the doctor said,” Ellie told Sophie in a serious tone, before letting her get into Adam’s embrace. Adam frowned when his little girl stared at him and didn’t hug him.

  “I don’t want to hurt you, Daddy.”

  “You could never hurt me.” Adam shook his head and smiled. “Actually, I think your hug would make me feel better. Way better.”

  Sophie’s eyes widened. “Weally?”

  He nodded, and when her tiny arms went around his neck and her head rested against his chest, he resisted the urge to wince. He’d ask the nurse for more painkillers later; right now, he only wanted to spend a little time with his daughter and reassure her he was fine.

  With Sophie snuggled against him, he looked at Ellie, who was standing by his bed with a worried frown and green eyes glistening with tears begging to spill. He stuck out his hand, and his heart soared when she took it. A hot spark of something he couldn’t name shot from his hand and traveled across his chest straight to his heart.

  “I’m sorry about the other night. I was an idiot. I shouldn’t have reacted the way I did.” He tugged on her hand a little, pulling her closer so that her thigh was pressed against the side of the bed.

  Ellie shook her head. “Don’t worry about that, it’s—”

  “No, please don’t find an excuse for my behavior. You were right: I was more preoccupied about a stupid mug than about hurting Sophie’s feelings.” He looked up from their joined hands to her pretty face. “And yours.”

  “It doesn’t matter anymore. All that matters is that you’re safe, now.” A sweet smile brightened her face, dissipating the frown that had pulled her brows together only a moment before. Comforting warmth and a sense of peace pervaded him.

  “No. All that matters is that I’ve finally realized something I’ve been pretending not to see.” He intertwined his fingers with hers, bringing her hand to his lips. “I love you, Ellie. I don’t want to deny my feelings anymore.”

  Ellie let out a soft gasp, and when he looked up at her, her eyes were sparkling. She smiled. “I love you, too. I thought my heart was going to break when I didn’t know if you were going to be okay. I… I couldn’t bear to lose you.”

  “You’re not going to lose me anytime soon. I’ll be fine,” he told her, smiling even as his shoulder throbbed with pain. He kissed Sophie’s head and inhaled her sweet baby scent. He’d thought he’d never see his little girl again. When the bullet pierced his flesh and pain shot through him, clouding his mind, all he’d been able to think of was who would take care of his baby; who’d tuck her in and read her stories; who’d cuddle her when she had a bad dream or when she was sick. He was glad he’d been given another shot at life, that he could still be the one to raise Sophie.

  “You scared me Daddy.” Sophie spoke against his chest, bringing him back from his memory of the shooting. She hugged him a little tigh
ter. This time he couldn’t hide his wince. Ellie frowned and squeezed his hand. “I don’t want you to go to heaven wif Mommy.”

  He shifted her so that she was sitting in his lap, not touching his shoulder, then kissed her head.

  “I’m not going anywhere, baby girl. I love you too much.” Tears welled in his eyes as he realized what must have gone through her young mind when she’d seen him on the gurney. “You know what would make me feel even better than a hug? A big kiss, right here on my cheek.” He tapped his finger on the right side of his face, and Sophie nodded.

  “I’ll kiss your boo-boo away, so you can come home.” She took his face with both her tiny hands and gave him an exaggerated, loud kiss.

  He looked from his daughter to Ellie and grinned. “How about you, Miss Ellie? Aren’t you going to give me a kiss to help me feel better?”

  Sophie clapped her hands. “Yes, give Daddy a kiss, so his boo-boo goes away more faster, and he can come home.”

  “Um, I…” A pretty shade of pink bloomed on Ellie’s cheeks; she was so cute he wished he could get out of bed and pull her into his arms. And kiss her senseless, too.

  “Please, Miss Ellie. I want Daddy to come home wif me.”

  “Please, Miss Ellie.” Adam mimicked Sophie’s pleading tone. Ellie rolled her eyes and shook her head, failing to fight a smile. His grin turned mischievous, and he tugged a little more on her hand, forcing her to sit on his bed when she lost her balance.

  He closed his eyes and puckered his lips, making funny kissy noises. Sophie giggled, and he squinted one eye open. Ellie had her head tilted to the side and was smiling.

  “All right, all right.” She let out an exasperated sigh and bent so that her head was only inches from him. He squeezed his eyes shut, and when her lips brushed his softly he leaned into her, only to be let down when she pulled back. His eyes fluttered open and he frowned.