by Gail Sattler
Patricia stared at Mike. He radiated pure joy, and she thought her heart would burst with happiness for him. He had Jesus in his heart, and it showed. The only thing about being with him now that wasn’t perfect was a tiny twinge of resentment that he hadn’t made his decision with her, but she quickly pushed such thinking aside.
“Even if I do have to go to jail for a short time, I can handle that. I did wrong, and I still have to face the consequences of my actions. But from here on, I’m a new creation.”
Jail. The word echoed in Patricia’s mind, crashing into her heart. Spending time in jail was still a very real possibility for Mike. For today, he was living in a euphoric bubble, but as life returned to normal, daily routine would bring him back down to earth a little bit. She said a quick prayer in her head that Mike would never lose the enthusiasm she saw right now.
“I want to celebrate. I’ve never felt like this before.”
She looked down at their joined hands, then back up to his face. She knew he still had more money than she did, despite his current unemployment status. However, he had shared with her that every time he thought he was close to getting a job, no one wanted to take the chance of hiring him before his court date, in case he had to go to jail. If that were the case, and if that trend continued, his money was going to run very low, very fast, especially if he did get a jail sentence.
The entrance of a new soul into God’s Kingdom was the best reason for celebration there could ever be, both in heaven and on earth, no matter what unpleasantness lay in the future. For this, Patty wanted to celebrate with him, and for this, it would be her treat. “I think a celebration is a great idea.” At her words, she felt an encouraging gentle squeeze on her hands.
She figured he would choose a convenient evening and name an expensive restaurant she probably couldn’t afford, but she would treat him anyway. “What do you want to do?” she asked.
Slowly, he released her hands and gently cupped her face, cradling her chin between both palms. His voice dropped to a low rumble. “I want to kiss you.”
Before she could protest or think of a good reason why he shouldn’t, he leaned forward over the lunches spread between them on the park bench and kissed her. He kissed her slowly and fully and so sweetly it made her insides melt.
No one had ever kissed her like this. Her stomach fluttered, and her heart pounded. Then he broke the contact, let his hands drop, and it was over.
Patricia sat speechless. Gradually, a lazy and very self-satisfied smile came over his face, making him more handsome than any man had a right to be. “I’ve wanted to do that for a long time.”
Patricia blinked herself back to reality and abruptly reached for her sandwich container. Not that she was hungry anymore, but she suddenly, desperately needed something to do.
A quick movement near the front of the bench caught her attention. She turned her head just in time to see the little brown squirrel run off into the trees.
She had forgotten about the squirrel, and this time it was her own movement that sent him scurrying away.
Mike made a strange choking sound and bit his bottom lip, like he was trying very hard not to laugh. “You scared Charlie Chipmunk.”
She stared at him, not caring that her mouth was hanging open. She couldn’t think of a single response. She couldn’t even remind him that it was a squirrel.
“Don’t you think we should pray and start eating? You have to get back to the office soon.”
“Yes. Of course.” Because he was a new child in Christ, she wanted to reach out and hold his hands while they prayed, but she was afraid to touch him. Since she already had her sandwich container in her hand, she opened it and laid it and the lid on the bench, then opened her juice container, as well as another containing some fruit cocktail, and spread everything out between them. The open containers, plus lids, effectively doubled the space between them.
“I think today you should pray,” Patricia mumbled. She folded her hands in her lap and waited. She knew she was being immature, but she couldn’t think properly.
“I’m not very good at this, but I know God knows what’s in my heart.” Mike cleared his throat and they both bowed their heads. “Dear Lord God. I thank You for this good lunch. And for Patty. Thank You for putting her into my life. Thanks for this special private place where we meet every day. Thank You most of all for Your love and for Your Son, Jesus. Amen.”
“Amen,” she said, then picked up her sandwich.
Mike also bit into his sandwich, and then talked around the food in his mouth. “I didn’t have time to check it out, but did you know they’re expanding the mall down the street?”
Patricia listened to him make cheerful conversation while they ate together, but for once she did very little talking. All she could think of was how Mike had kissed her. She tried to figure out why he would have done that, but the only thing she could think of was that he was so excited about his newfound discovery of God’s love for him that he acted impulsively, and since she was the nearest person, his enthusiasm spilled over onto her.
She wanted to talk to Bruce about what exactly was said at those meetings Mike attended, but lately Bruce had been very touchy whenever the subject of Mike came up. Since Sunday, she found herself avoiding Bruce, because she knew he would give her a rough time when he discovered she still had Mike’s car.
If she couldn’t get the information out of Bruce, she would have to go elsewhere. Even though she didn’t know Claude except for the two times they’d met, Patricia decided to call him. She had no intention of prodding for confidential details of what Mike said at the meetings, because that was meant to stay within the boundaries of their meeting and was only for the ears of those who attended.
She needed to know that the things Claude was teaching Mike were spiritually sound. To do that, she needed an excuse to talk to him and broach the subject.
Because Mike had been a little late arriving, the lunch break seemed the shortest of her life, added to the fact that Mike was talking nonstop.
On the hour, she stacked her empty lunch containers in her bag at the same time as Mike tossed his empty containers into his backpack.
Mike stood and slung the backpack over his shoulders. “Oh, before I forget. Remember that this Thursday is Claude’s seven-year cake, and you said we’d go to his special meeting.”
Patricia couldn’t hold back her smile. God knew the answer before she had formulated the question.
She very much looked forward to talking to Claude.
“Patty! Mike! Good to see you two!”
Patricia smiled politely while Claude first pumped Mike’s hand, then laid one hand on Mike’s shoulder and patted him on the back with the other. She had always found it amusing the lengths men would go to not to hug each other, even when the situation warranted it. The bond between Mike and Claude was almost tangible, and her heart filled with joy for both of them.
Since Claude was busy talking to a great many people, Patricia did not protest when Mike led her to a chair, and they sat down to wait for the meeting to start.
This time, Patricia found the meeting slightly different. The few meetings she’d previously attended hadn’t had a specific theme. Often the speakers didn’t know what they were going to say until they got to the front; in fact, some of the speakers didn’t know they were going to speak until they felt led to say something at that particular moment.
Today, many of the people present included Claude in their testimonies, either congratulating him for this, his anniversary of seven years without a drink, or saying what a help Claude had been to them in their individual quests for sobriety.
Claude came to the podium last. He briefly told of the happenings around his decision to begin attending AA meetings, and spoke of a man who had greatly helped him in the beginning. Her heart filled with joy for him when Claude elaborated on what AA circles called his “spiritual awakening.” His experience was very much like what Mike had gone through; first there was a
general belief in God as a Supreme Creator, but this grew to a more personal relationship as he realized the full scope of God’s love in his life, despite the bad things that had happened. He gave all the credit for his accomplishments to Jesus, and at the end of his testimony, the crowd burst into rounds of applause. Brief glances to the sides showed Patricia that she was the only one with tears in her eyes. Quickly she wiped them away before anyone could notice.
When the meeting came to a close, Claude served everyone a piece of the largest Black Forest cake Patricia had ever seen. Since he was the center of attention today, she chose not to question him. Besides, many of her questions on where he stood spiritually were answered from listening to his testimony.
With a piece of cake in hand, she retreated with Mike to an empty spot in the room.
Mike stuffed the last of his cake into his mouth and swiped away a bit of icing from his chin. “Claude just asked me if I wanted to go to church with him on Sunday. I told him that I’ve been going with you, and then he said you were welcome to come too. You want to?”
Her first thought was to decline because she handed out bulletins with her mother, but she couldn’t talk with cake in her mouth. Before she could form the words, another thought struck her. Last Sunday, when she had made the rounds amongst the congregation with Mike at her side, she had been very aware of Bruce nearby, and she got the impression that he hadn’t been very pleased to see her with Mike. Nothing had been said, but his disapproval weighed heavily on her long after church was over. She didn’t like confrontations, especially since she’d already told Bruce that she knew what she was doing by spending so much time with Mike. Even after that, Bruce’s attitude apparently did not change. Not that she would skip church to get away from Bruce, but attending another church for one Sunday was a rare opportunity for her, and it gave her an excuse to avoid her brother.
Patricia nodded and swallowed. “Yes. I’d like that.”
Mike smiled, making Patricia’s foolish heart flutter. “Great. I’ll get the address from him. As usual, you’ll have to pick me up.”
She knew she should have given him back his car long ago, but with her own car still needing that rather expensive repair, using Mike’s car was too convenient. Besides, many of the miles she put on his car were from chauffeuring him around, so that made it acceptable for her to still have it.
She smiled back. “Name the time, and I’ll be there.”
“Hi, Patty.” Mike shucked off his backpack, dusted off the bench so he wouldn’t have to send his good slacks to the dry cleaner, and sat.
Patty’s eyes narrowed slightly as she checked out his clothes. She turned her head to look for his bike, which was exactly in the same spot as he parked it every day. “Why are you dressed like that?”
He sighed and ran one hand down the lapel of his suit jacket. Since it was his turn to bring lunch, he couldn’t be late. He only had time to throw everything into his backpack before he rushed out the door. “I didn’t have time to change. I went for a job interview this morning, and I got home five minutes after the time I should have left to come here.”
“I wouldn’t have minded you being late. Really. But you do look nice in the suit. How did it go?”
Mike sighed. “The same as last time. It looked really promising, but as soon as I told them about needing time off for court, they suddenly didn’t think I was suitable.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll get something soon.”
“I don’t know. I’m not so sure anymore.” He sighed again. “Let’s eat.” He emptied all the containers from his backpack onto the bench between them, they paused for a prayer of thanks for the food, then dug in.
“If you were running late, I would have understood. All you had to do was phone, and I could have picked something up at the local drive-thru.”
Mike grinned. “Honestly, I had everything made and wrapped before I had to leave for the interview. I just had to throw it all into my backpack and go.”
The smile she gave him did funny things to his hungry stomach. “I didn’t know you were so organized.”
He held up a brown paper bag. “Hey. I even brought lunch for the chipmunk.”
She rolled her eyes. “It’s a squirrel. One day I’ll bring an encyclopedia and show you the genus and species.”
Mike laughed and bit into his sandwich. Today he appreciated the teasing because it distracted him from what was really on his mind. He had wanted to tell Patty that he’d gotten a job, because he really thought he had it. Now, after yet another failure, he was more than disappointed. He was downright discouraged. He usually didn’t give up when he was going after something he wanted, but this time he didn’t see any point in continuing to look for a job until after the court case was over and whatever sentence he received had been served.
He was about to point out that her little critter still hadn’t shown up when he heard muffled footsteps on the path to the bench. They both looked up at the same time.
“It’s Daddy.” Patty checked her watch. “I wonder what he wants.”
Mike’s chest tightened. He often chatted briefly with Patty’s father after Sunday services, but it was always only pleasant small talk, nothing personal, conversation suitable for discussion within the congregation. A few times, Mike had spoken to her father on the phone while waiting for Patty to answer, but that had been simply passing time, and there was never time or opportunity for a serious discussion. He’d been inside the church on a weekday only a couple of times because usually he joined Patty at the bench as soon as he arrived.
Now there was only the three of them, no one else anywhere nearby, no time constraints, and no distractions.
Patty leaned slightly closer. With her father approaching, he didn’t want it to appear that he was too close to her, but he didn’t want to look guilty by backing away too quickly. He forced himself to be still.
Patty’s voice dropped to a whisper. “I’ll bet Daddy will be impressed with the suit.” She had the nerve to giggle.
Mike’s stomach went to war with the sandwich. He’d never cared if he impressed a woman’s father before. In fact, he hadn’t met most of the fathers of the women he dated. Until now, he’d pointedly avoided them. Either that, or they had avoided him.
He reached up to pat where his tie should have been. He hadn’t wanted it to dangle or blow around during his bike ride on the way there, so he had yanked it off as he was leaving. Now, when he wanted to make a good impression, he wished he’d kept it on. He also didn’t feel completely dressed in a suit without a tie.
He tried to squelch the feeling of dread as he rose to his feet and nodded a stiff greeting. “Pastor Norbert.”
Patty’s father smiled warmly, but Mike’s stomach wouldn’t relax. “Hi, Mike, Patty. Sorry to disturb you, especially on this gorgeous day, but Cassandra Phillips is on the phone. She wants to talk to you about her daughter’s Sunday school class. I told her you were on your break and couldn’t come to the phone, but she started crying and said it was important she talk to you now. She said she’s on her lunch break, too, and this is the only time she can call. I’m sorry about this. Would you mind?”
Patty sighed, stood, and turned to Mike. “I’m sorry, but I know what she wants to talk about. I shouldn’t be long. Do you mind?”
He rammed his hands into his pockets. “No, not at all. I don’t mind.”
He supposed it was better coming sooner than later. With Patty gone, this would be the perfect opportunity for her father to talk to him about all the time he was spending with her. He suspected her father’s sentiments about his character wouldn’t be much different from Bruce’s, and Mike couldn’t blame him for that. He wouldn’t be able to deny a word of why he shouldn’t be in the vicinity of his sweet and precious daughter.
Mike struggled to prepare himself for the worst. He didn’t want to take his hands out of his pockets, because he knew they were shaking. He didn’t want to hear her father tell him to go away and not come back, be
cause he didn’t want to do that. Part of him told him to respect her father’s wishes, but another part of him prepared to defend himself, even though he had no defense. If he didn’t ever see Patty again, it would be like ripping out a piece of his soul. He couldn’t do it.
Pastor Norbert checked his watch. “I wish I could stay out here and keep you company until Patty’s done, but I have an appointment scheduled in two minutes. Maybe one day I’ll have enough free time to join you and Patty out here for lunch. She tells me you make a great submarine sandwich.”
Mike tried not to let his mouth hang open as Patty’s father smiled, said a polite good-bye, and Patty and her father walked together toward the church. Mike heard them talking about the small child in question until they were out of earshot.
Mike sank to the bench. In the eyes of a righteous man like Patty’s father, he was lowlife. Countless times he’d broken the law by drinking and driving, and the only thing that stopped him was being caught for the hit-and-run. Yet, even knowing that, Patty’s father treated him as an equal, giving him a respect he didn’t deserve.
He turned his head, meaning to watch them until they disappeared into the building, but a small movement caught his attention.
Patty’s squirrel had arrived for its lunch. Mike studied it as it cautiously climbed up the side of the bench opposite to where he was sitting and then sat on the end, staring back.
Mike smiled. He was having a stare-down with a squirrel.
Very slowly, Mike lifted the paper bag containing the bread and reached inside. Inch by inch, the little squirrel tiptoed along the back of the park bench, until it was so close that Mike could reach out from where he was sitting and the little animal could take the food out of his hand.