by Mia Villano
“Weird for who? You can’t leave. No, I won’t allow it.”
“Avery, I have to. You can’t start off your married life with me in here. That would be wrong.”
“The hell I can’t. I don’t want you to leave and neither does Cherise. This place is huge and most the time you are with Pepe in the mansion.”
“Well, it’s something we should talk about with Cherise. I don’t want her to feel uncomfortable. We can see how it goes.” I would let it drop for a while but deep inside, it would be the right thing to do. They didn’t need me around.
“Yes, we will be fine. You aren’t leaving me now. I’m not ready for that. Case closed.”
“Well, how about we head out to the grocery store and go get some dinner at the Lebanese restaurant. I’m dying for some hummus and hot sauce.”
“You read my mind. See, that is another reason why you aren’t leaving. Who would finish my thoughts and go eat falafel with me?”
It was Thursday and not what we usually did, but Fabrice was in a meeting, and I was too tired for anything else. We shopped at our favorite organic grocery store and loaded up on our weekly favorites. Of course, we argued about what we needed and what we had. That was typical. Avery talked to the bakery about making a vegan cake for her wedding. She wanted chocolate and peanut butter with chocolate shaved around it.
I told Fabrice he could stop over after his meeting. That was around two in the morning. At two in the morning found myself unable to sleep and in the shower. I was tense and worried about everything going on in my life. The shower was where I liked to go and think. While the hot water washed over my body I heard the door open.
“Avery?”
“No.” I heard the accent right away. I pushed my head out the door and smiled. He instantly started to undress. That was my reward. Watching him undress in front of me in the seclusion of the bathroom was what I needed.
“Hello.” I looked at him. He stepped in and pressed his lips to mine before taking me into his arms and pulling me to him.
“What’s wrong, my sweet Isabella? Why no smile for me?”
“I don’t know, Fabrice. I just don’t know.” I buried my wet face into his neck as the water washed over us.
“You have some decisions to make. You need to turn in your notice and start looking at some places where you could open up what you want.”
“Oh, is that all?”
“Fabrice, what is it about me that you love? Why me? I’m not your type in any way.”
He grabbed the bar of soap and started soaping his hands. His fingers caressed my shoulders and neck with the warm soapy water.
“Isabella, why do you keep questioning this? I don’t understand.”
I looked down remembering the voice of Anthony in my head yelling at me that he was with me because I had great tits and his parents insisted we be together. He said I wasn’t pretty and one day he could see me getting fat.
“I don’t understand any of this, Fabrice. You could be with any woman. They would line up to be with you even if for one night. You have dated models. What is it about me that you want?”
He grabbed my face in his hands and looked into my eyes. The water drenched both our heads. My arms were wrapped around his slippery waist.
“The moment I saw you I saw my life start. I saw everything I had been searching for standing in front of me that day you walked into the office.”
“I’m an Italian girl from a questionable family with a slew of problems. I have emotional issues that I haven’t worked through yet. You know I’m a mess.”
“I trust my gut feelings, Isabella. I know what inside me tells me and when I look at you it tells me you are the one.”
He started to wash my back and my ass squeezing it as he washed me.
“I thought being alone would clear my head and help me figure out what I wanted. It made it worse. I’m more confused.” His hands were amazing. Working out the stress I had relaxed me.
“It’s not worse. You are getting closer to what you want to do and you are fighting it. You wanted to be on your own for so long that you refuse to accept the path you thought you wanted isn’t the right one. Just stop worrying about it and let it happen. It will happen.” His words of wisdom made me wonder how in the hell I became so lucky to have him.
He stayed with me that night. We didn’t have sex. We were both exhausted. Being next to him and having his body wrapped around me was better that having him in me that night. He comforted me and held me.
Before we settled into bed, I checked my phone and found missed texts from my mom, Danny, and my sister sent hours before. I was so tired to talk or carry on a text conversation. I sent each of them a quick group message and told them I was going to bed unless it was extremely urgent. I would talk to them the next day. I didn’t hear from anyone so I assumed all was well, but it was also three in the morning when I sent it.
Fabrice slipped out early the following morning to be home for an extremely early meeting at his residence. My phone was plugged in beside my bed charging and it rang waking me up. The sound of the ringer told me it was my mom. I looked at the clock. I had only slept about four hours.
“Hello.” I whispered.
“Isabella, it’s Mom.”
“Who’s dead?” I asked half joking. That was our family joke when one of us called too late or too early.
“Anthony,” my mom answered matter of factly.
Chapter 15
I instantly sat up in bed. The words that Anthony was dead had to be a dream. How could he be dead?
Did I hear her right? Was she joking? Was I still asleep?
“Mom, that’s not funny.” I said.
“I’m not joking. He killed himself yesterday.”
I sat up as ice shot through my body. Her words echoed in my ears. Anthony’s dead. I stood up and paced my room.
“Who told you?”
“Everyone’s talking about it. His mom called and told me right before I called you yesterday. I didn’t want to leave you a message. Plus, I didn’t know if you were back from Colorado. I wanted to tell you myself. I guess he gassed himself in his car in the garage. That’s horrible. His mother is going through so much.”
“Yeah.” I grabbed my robe and put it on to walk out into the kitchen, I needed water. I needed to wake up Avery. I was shivering. I didn’t know if was from being cold or if it was from the news I heard about Anthony. He was dead.
The phone was still at my ear as I walked around the condo. I forgot I was still talking to my mom.
“Mom, I have to go. I need to….I need to go.”
“Okay. You know we have to go to the funeral. It’s the right thing to do. I don’t know when it will be but I know we can’t ignore it.”
She was right. I had to go to the funeral. My head was in a daze. I pinched the bridge of my nose trying to keep my head together. I thought I was going to break down and cry. I shouldn’t feel sad. He was a monster, a horrible human. Why was I crying? I needed to go running. I quickly put on my running gear and headed out into the morning. The sun was coming up and the wet grass soaked my running shoes. I don’t know how long I ran. It must have been at least five miles. I could’ve gone longer, but I left my cell phone at home and I wanted to talk to Fabrice.
When I came back home, Avery was still asleep. I left her and stripped off my clothes and jumped into the hot shower. The water was heaven on my aching body. I hadn’t run in a while and my muscles were sore. I could’ve stayed in there for the rest of the day.
Avery was up and moving around when I got out.
“Hey, Izz. Did I hear you leave like at the ass crack of dawn this morning?”
“Anthony is dead.”
“What? Did someone kill him?”
“No, he killed himself. I mean, I don’t know. They say he killed himself. I questioned that. He hated thinking about his own death. I don’t know. My mom called me this morning.”
“How did he kill himself?” she asked. I t
old her that he gassed himself in their garage and his mother found him. What if the guys that beat him up came to finish him off? If it was true that he gassed himself, it was a pathetic ending to a pathetic man. Yes, he was a monster and what he did to me couldn’t be overlooked, but he didn’t need to die. I had hoped he would be able to go on with his life and find some peace and happiness and possibly the help he needed to be in a normal relationship. I had such mixed emotions running through me that day and the rest of the week. I wanted to reach out to his mother but I chose to wait until the funeral.
~~~~~~~~~~~
The few days after Anthony’s death dawned a new and odd reality. He was gone and I never had to worry about him. I had my resignation letter I was handing into General Morou and I had the death of my abusive ex-boyfriend on my mind. Pain racked my chest thinking about how he did it. How desperate he must have been. Talking to my parents that weekend and Fabrice, I was convinced he did it. I found out he left a note. My mom said it made no sense. He wasn’t the same person as he was before the beating. He would never have been the same.
“I’m tired of being like this.” That was all he wrote. That was all he left his grieving mother and sick father that was close to death himself.
The funeral would be at his family’s funeral home. His uncle was taking over and had been since Anthony went into the hospital.
My family insisted we go together. I agreed. Avery refused to go and I understood. She couldn’t forgive him for what he did to me and she never would.
On a cold and rainy Tuesday, we reluctantly headed to Silvio Funeral Home. I was extremely nervous not knowing how I would be able to look at him dead. The thought of him alive was beyond what I wanted to deal with, but dead seemed just as bad. He still scared me and there was absolutely nothing he could ever do to me again.
There wasn’t too many people there to bid Anthony a lasting goodbye. The usual Guido-type guys came to pay their respect. Some I remembered from when I dated him. They were friendly and all spoke to me. His father was unable to attend because he was bed ridden. I tried to keep myself to the back of the funeral home. I didn’t want to get too close to his casket. I went up to his mother. She looked so upset, so frail. My heart ached for her pain, of losing a child almost. She was the one that found him. She dragged him out of the car screaming for someone to help her I heard. It was too late. He had been in the garage all night and she didn’t find him until the next morning. She hugged me tight when I went up to her. I couldn’t speak. I didn’t know what to say. I wanted her to know I was sorry. I wanted her to know that it was horrible and I forgave him. The words wouldn’t come out. Nothing would, not even tears as I watched her cry in front of me. I was only able to say one thing to her.
“I’m sorry.”
“I’m sorry, Isabella. I’m sorry he wasn’t good to you. I don’t know what happened to him. He had everything. I’m so sorry.” She cried as I held her hand.
“It’s okay, Mrs. Silvio. I forgave him a long time ago.”
I agreed to come and visit her. She said she wanted to talk to me when life settled down.
The smell of the flowers and the familiar faces of my past took over my emotions. I couldn’t stay in there. I needed to get out. I whispered to my mom that I was stepping out and she squeezed my hand in agreement. I needed air. I stepped outside the large brick home that was also the Silvio Funeral Home. I had been here so many times and Anthony and I even had sex in the back of a hearse. When we first started dating, I loved to come to his house. So many times we did it in his room. The room that I looked up and saw the window standing outside. I wasn’t sad. I was in a weird place, an emotional place. I didn’t feel right being there. I paid my respects and it was time for me to move on. The rain had stopped and the steps were still damp but the sunshine dried a spot. Before I sat down, I noticed Fabrice’s BMW parked across the street. He rolled down the window.
“Isabella.” He called.
My heart leapt. I was so glad to see him. How did he know? I ran to his car and slid into the passenger seat. He grabbed and hugged me.
“How did you know?” I asked.
“I just knew.” His blue eyes melted my insides. Tears stung my eyes as he held me.
“It was sad. Not sad, that he is gone, sad because of his family. His mother is beside herself. She wants me to come over so she can talk to me. I should.”
He held my head up against him. His arms were my barrier against all that was bad. They were my shield. I looked up and he kissed me. His mouth was so tender on my lips.
“That’s a good idea. Put this behind you so you can go on. You need that and maybe she does too.”
“Has anyone ever told you how amazing you are?”
“They have, but all that matters is I’m amazing to you.” My lips kissed him and slid down his throat. My tongue stroked his Adams apple and made my pulse race. I wanted him right there. I wanted him to make the memories of Anthony wash away. The depth of my need for him scared me. I had never needed someone like this. It made me wonder, did he need me as much?
“I have some bad news.”
“What, now? “ I asked.
“I have to go to Paris for quite a while.” My heart sank. Not now. I was finishing up my time at the Embassy and now dealing with Anthony’s death. I didn’t say that. I didn’t want him to think I was mad he had to go. It was his job.
“Okay. What is quite a while and when are you leaving?”
“I’m leaving tonight and I could be gone for a month.”
I looked away and couldn’t help but cry. The tears poured out. I don’t usually cry at the drop of hat, but I was overly emotional that day.
“Don’t cry, Isabella. Why don’t you come with me?”
“I can’t, Fabrice. I have to get fitted for a dress for Sophia, I have to help Avery plan her wedding, and I need to get finished up at the office.”
“That’s something else I need to discuss with you.”
“What?”
“If you didn’t go, the General asked if you could stay a little longer. Can you?”
I hesitated.
“Yes, I can stay. I get along with her fine. It won’t be a problem.” I reluctantly agreed and he grabbed my hand and kissed my fingers.
“Thank you. I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t serious.”
“Will you be safe?”
“As safe as I can be.” I began to cry again.
“Of course I will be safe. No one wants to hurt me, I’m the Ambassador. This is strictly my job. I have to spend so much time over in Paris.”
He reached over the seat and took me in his arms. I looked out the window and every one was exiting the church. I noticed my family and told him I had to go.
“Don’t be upset over this and don’t listen to what the girl’s gossip about around the office.”
“What do you mean?” I pulled away from him.
“General Morou is going with me. I don’t want you to think it’s anything but our job.” My heart sank.
Chapter 16
I was okay with it. I had to be. It was the same as General Gerard going with him, right?
“That’s fine.” I forced out.
“She will be instructing you from Paris on what she needs done. She can’t do this without you and she hasn’t found a suitable replacement.”
“That’s fine, Fabrice. I will put it off a while longer.”
“You don’t have to go to the office every day, only if she needs you to do something. It will be like you’re on call for her.” I liked that.
“Sounds fine, I don’t have a problem with helping.” He grabbed my hand and kissed my fingers.
“Do you want to get out of here? I have the afternoon free and I want nothing more than to spend it with you, inside you, on top of you.” I thought quickly. Yes, I wanted to spend what little time I had with him.
“Let’s get out of here.”
My mom looked over at me and saw that I was with Fabrice. She caug
ht my eye and winked.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Before we made it into the house he had my dress unzipped. This man was insatiable and totally mine. His hands were all over the place as he drove. Thankfully, his staff didn’t see anything. Being that it was a week day, everyone was there and the place was busy. We made it up to his living quarters without too much of an incident. The chef was in the kitchen cooking and the cleaning staff were busy.
Once we made it upstairs and in his room, he already had his fingers in me. Laughing at our insatiable appetite for one another, Fabrice threw me on his bed and jumped on me. He was like an animal in heat and I loved it.
“You’re a maniac.”
He ripped off my clothes. For the funeral I decided to wear black nylon with garter belts. It was the first time Fabrice saw me like that. His reaction was quite eye opening.
He smiled down at me while he looked me over.
“Wow, I’ve died and for some reason made it to heaven. “
“You like those?”
“I love those. If that is your official funeral mourning outfit, we need to hit some more funerals. You get even more beautiful every time I’m with you.”
I took off his shirt and buried my face in his chest. He smelled so good and was so warm. He pulled my face up to him and he kissed me long and hard. Taking my mouth like his possession.
“What will I do without you in Paris?” His mouth trailed down my neck and across my chest. His lips lightly brushing my nipples. He sucked on each one pulling and biting them lightly. I moaned arching my back. Licking and tasting me he made his way down my stomach to my aching sex. I pulled on his hair, pulling him up to me.
“Just fuck me, Fabrice. You don’t have to do that.”
“Yes, I do. I want you all over me before I leave. I want to still taste you in Paris.” Arousal and need burst through my body when he said that. His face buried into my pussy, his tongue pushed into me lapping at me. It felt so good it hurt. His soft tongue caressed my clit, swollen and aching then lightly sucking on it to bring me to the edge of no return. My fingers clawed at his hair. His hands wrapped around my waist as I thrashed under him.