It was the reserve in his eyes that held her back from throwing her arms about his neck and telling him how wonderful she thought he was.
He continued to look at her silently for several more tense minutes. 'Now is your cue to tell me that last night was a mistake, that you acted impulsively, that it was because you were so upset about the twins that you allowed yourself to be seduced into my bed,' his voice was flat, emotionless.
'You forgot "I had too much wine and didn't know what I was doing",' she said lightly, now understanding the reason for his reserve; he thought she would wake up this morning and regret the night they had spent together.
He sighed. 'Yes. God, I knew I shouldn't have let it happen.' He fell back against his pillow, his arms above his head as he stared up at the ceiling. 'But I was greedy,' he muttered. 'I couldn't say no when the opportunity, was given to me. Fool,' he groaned. 'Fool, fool, fool!'
'Did I forget something else?' he bit out grimly, angry at his own stupidity.
Robyn moved to lean on her elbow looking down at him. 'You forgot the fact that I haven't said any of those things, you have,' she teased gently, feeling an overwhelming tenderness towards the man whose body lay so warmly against her own.
He turned slowly to look at her, uncertainty in his eyes. 'Say something,' he invited gruffly.
'Thank you,' she breathed softly.
'Hm?' he was stunned into surprise.
Robyn smiled serenely, smoothing the frown from his brow. 'Last night was the most incredible night of my entire life,' she told him honestly.
'It was?'
She laughed at his incredulity. 'Can you doubt it?' she taunted her own uninhibited responses to him during the night.
Sin grimaced. 'When I'm with you like this I forget my own name!'
'Well last night you lived up to it! Now I have personal experience of the saying "wicked as sin". You are you know, very wicked,' but she didn't sound as if she minded that in the least.
'Am I?' he ran his thumbtip over her nipple as her breasts rested against his chest.
She trembled in reaction. 'You know you are. Don't do that!' she quivered, beginning to tremble as the now familiar warmth invaded her body, a fact he was well aware of as he moved to pin her beneath him.
It was over an hour later when they finally managed to leave Sin's bed and go down and prepare a late breakfast together. Robyn had to laugh when Sin proceeded to produce four or five assorted cartons of pre-cooked breakfast food.
'Do you always live like this?' she mocked as they helped themselves to the food straight from the foil trays once it had been heated.
'It saves on washing-up,' he nodded, having taken the time to shower and shave, the squareness of his jaw bare of stubble now, his hair still damp, his only clothing a short black towelling robe.
Robyn had opted for one of his shirts instead of the robe, feeling slightly ridiculous when she tried on the latter and the sleeves reached down to her knees. The black silk shirt Sin had worn the evening before lay against her skin like a caress, although that too reached down to her knees, the sleeves turned back to her elbows.
She grinned at him. 'I think I like living decadently for a change.'
Some of the laughter left his face, although it was quickly masked as he stood up. 'In that case, let's go back to bed!'
'Sin!' she squealed as he swung her up into his arms, 'Shouldn't a man of your mature years be taking things a little slower?' she mocked.
'Oh I'll be slow, Robyn.' There was a dangerous glitter in his eyes, a promise of things to come. 'I'll be very, very slow,' he told her with satisfaction.
And he was, exquisitely so, Robyn sobbing for his possession, a possession he relentlessly denied her as he took her again and again to peaks of ecstasy.
'Torturer!' she groaned, her head moving from side to side on the pillow as the mindless pleasure continued to torment her.
He raised his head to look at her with glowing blue eyes. 'I intend to imprint myself on your body so well you'll never be able to forget me,' he told her roughly, renewing his pleasure-giving caresses.
'I never could,' she gasped.
'I'm not taking any chances,' he said grimly, at last joining his body to hers, thrusting into her deeply, Robyn more than ready for him.
And if she had thought the night incredibly sensual the day was even more so, Sin finding new plateaus of desire for them to scale together, so that by the time she heard the ringing of her telephone at four o'clock that afternoon she felt as if she were merely an extension of the man himself, that they now shared something really special.
'Where are you going?' Sin asked dazedly as she dashed to the cottage door.
'Telephone,' she told him breathlessly, holding his shirt more securely about her.
'They'll call back-—'
'It might be Brad,' she said agitatedly, hurrying into the adjoining cottage without a second glance.
It was Brad, ringing to tell her he would be bringing the children back now, that she could expect them in an hour or so. She didn't get to talk to Kim and Andy, but just the thought that they were coming home was enough-to put a glow in her eyes and a happy curve to her mouth.
Sin had dressed and was in the kitchen drinking coffee at the kitchen table when she let herself in, and Robyn instantly sensed something different about him, although she didn't quite know what it was.
'It was Brad,' she told him quietly.
'Yes?' He continued to drink his coffee.
She frowned at his lack of warmth after the hours they had just spent together. 'He's going to drive the twins back now,' she explained.
'Good,' he nodded.
'Sin?' Her confusion deepened, hardly recognising him as the man who had made love to her continuously through the night and day. 'What's wrong?' she prompted.
'Wrong?' His eyes were hard as he looked at her, a cool icy blue. 'What could possibly be wrong?' he rasped.
'I don't know,' she shook her head, swallowing hard. Was the weekend over, was that it? Had he reversed the roles on her and made her the one night stand he had accused her of trying to make him? Hadn't the hours she had spent in his arms meant the same to him?
The mug he had been drinking from landed on the table with a loud clatter, making Robyn jump nervously. 'You run out of here wearing only my shirt just so that you can talk to your ex-husband on the telephone, you come back to me after speaking to him with the sort of smile on your lips I'd walk through hot coals for and you don't know what's wrong!' he shouted fiercely.
Her heart had leapt at the admission about hot coals, having received no verbal declaration of love from him during their long night together, although she had been sure he couldn't have made love to her the way he had if he didn't feel something more for her than desire.
'What's wrong is that you aren't married to him any longer,' Sin bit out roughly.
'I know that, but I knew he would be calling me about bringing the twins———'
'I don't believe that's the reason you ran to talk to him,' he told her viciously, his eyes blazing.
'Sin, please listen to me———'
'No, you listen to me!' he ordered angrily. 'I'm not going to accept being made into someone you come to for a little physical comfort. I was wrong when I said you made the mistake last night, I'm the one that did that, thinking I could seriously mean anything to you—:—'
'But you do,' she protested.
'Do you love me?' he asked scornfully.
Colour deepened her cheeks. Love? Not once during their night and day together had she allowed herself to think of her feelings for this man, knowing that whatever it was she did feel for him it was still too young and vulnerable to be analysed into a category.
'No, of course you don't,' he dismissed disgustedly. 'And I don't suppose you want anything more to do with me now either!'
'It will be a little difficult when the twins get back———'
'Why?' he cut in ruthlessly.
'Well�
�Because———'
'Why should my spending all my evenings with you now be any different to the past week?'
The colour in her cheeks wouldn't seem to recede. 'I wasn't thinking of the evenings—'
'And I certainly wasn't talking about the nights,' he rasped harshly. 'Do you really imagine I would run the risk of the children seeing us together—like that?'
She looked at him appealingly. 'I don't understand what you want from me. Didn't you enjoy last night?' She was sure it had been as pleasurable for him as it had for her.
'You know I did,' he snapped. 'But I've never been subjected to the role of sexual plaything before, and I'm not about to start now.'
'Sexual plaything!' she spluttered disbelievingly. 'Sin, you have to be joking!'
'Do I?' he scorned bitterly. 'What else was last night about if it wasn't sex?'
'Don't make it seem as if last night was all my fault,' she was becoming angry herself now. 'You were there too, you know!'
'I know exactly where I was,' he met her gaze challengingly. 'But like I said, it was a mistake.'
'Well that's just fine!' she snapped, turning to go up the stairs. 'I'll get dressed and then leave.'
'Robyn——-'
'Don't say any more, Sin,' she told him through tight lips, her control dangerously close to slipping. 'Not if you want to allow me to leave with any dignity at all.'
He seemed to be about to say something and then changed his mind, turning away to stare out of the kitchen window, his shoulders hunched over, his hands thrust into his pockets. She turned with a choked cry and ran up the stairs, made to fed even worse as she donned what was obviously a dress meant to be worn in the evening rather than late afternoon. The fact that she had nothing else here to wear, having discarded Sin's shirt on the rumpled unmade bed, made her feel cheap and nasty, making the time she had spent with Sin seem the same way.
What was the matter with him that he should be acting this way? He was reacting how she should have reacted, accusing her of using him, of having no deeper feelings for him than the sexual ones. If the whole situation weren't so depressingly painful it would be laughable!
He hadn't moved when she returned down the stairs, and the rigidity of his stiffly held back didn't encourage her to talk to him again, to try and make him understand. She closed the cottage door behind her, straightening her shoulders so he wouldn't see just how upset she was.
That pride lasted her until she closed her own cottage door behind her, and then a desolation more intense than the previous day washed over her, leaving her emotionally broken.
But none of that distress showed when Brad arrived back with the children shortly after five, and after their initial greetings she faced Brad while the twins went to wash for tea.
His gaze was speculative on her pale face. 'You were a long time answering the telephone this afternoon.'
She shrugged. 'I was busy.'
'You sounded breathless.'
'Did I?' she dismissed. 'I don't remember.'
'I see Thornton is back,' Brad raised dark brows in mocking query.
'Yes.' She turned back to the work-top, arranging cakes on a plate, her hands shaking slightly.
'Still not friends?' Brad taunted, watching in amusement as one of the cakes fell out of her hand to the floor.
'Well, don't just stand there,' she snapped from her bending position as she picked up the biggest pieces of the broken cake. 'Get me a cloth.'
He didn't hurry himself as he did so, dropping the cloth into her impatiently waiting hand. 'Hit a raw nerve, did I?' he mocked as she accidentally threw the cloth into the bin along with the discarded cake, impatiently retrieving it to wash it under the running tap. 'Or did I hit several?' he mused.
'Mind your own business, Brad.'
'You're doing it again,' he mocked smilingly. 'Acting defensively is a sure sign that something's wrong.'
The cloth landed in the sink with a squelchy splash as she threw it down to turn on him angrily. 'I'm sick and tired of amateur psychiatrists analysing my actions this weekend,' she told
him heatedly. 'Telling you to mind your own business isn't acting defensively, it's doing exactly^ what it sounds like.'
'Who else has been analysing you? Sin?' Brad wasn't at all put off by her anger. 'Have the two of you made up and argued again all in the space of one day?'
'Why don't you———'
'My God, you have,' he laughed. 'You never used to be this fiery, Robyn.'
'I'm well aware of the fact that I used to be your doormat———'
'You're getting nasty now.' The amusement had gone from his face and voice.
She had also done nothing but argue with him lately when usually she couldn't be bothered with such things.
'I'm sorry, Brad.' She put a hand up to her temple. 'This weekend hasn't been a good time for me. I've missed the twins dreadfully.'
'They've missed you too,' he told her dryly.
'They have?' she frowned.
'Did you think they wouldn't?' he scoffed her stupidity.
'They seemed to be having such a good time when I telephoned yesterday…' She shook her head. 'I thought they would be too busy to even think of me.'
'Maybe they were, until it came to bed time.' He grimaced. 'I didn't catch on to the glass of water routine at all. I was just damned angry when they kept calling out like that. I think I went down a couple of notches in their estimation.'
'I'm sure you didn't,' she could afford to be generous now that she knew the twins had missed her.
'Maybe not,' he shrugged dismissively, 'Anyway, I leave for South Africa in the week, ni give you a call when I get back.'
It was his usual casual parting, and she knew it could be months before they saw him again. She was even secretly—and selfishly—a little pleased that she would have Kim and Andy exclusively to herself for several weeks.
But the two children who sat down to tea with her were nothing like the two that had left so excitedly for London the previous evening, and she felt guilty for her own elation in Brad's absence; the children were sure to feel the parting more after being with him for the weekend.
'Did you have a good time?' she tried to draw them into conversation as they merely picked at their food rather than eating it, an unusual occurrence when they both had such healthy appetites.
'Yes.' As usual it was Andy that answered for both of them, not looking up from his plate.
'How is your cold, Kim?' she tried another approach.
'Better,' her daughter answered flatly.
'So what did you and Daddy do over the weekend?' she asked brightly.
'We went shopping.' Once again it was Andy that answered her. 'And then last night Daddy took us out to a proper restaurant. Today we just spent at his flat.'
'Well you couldn't go out all the time.' She stood up to clear away, most of the food left untouched. 'Daddy has been working all week, I suppose he was tired.'
'Oh we didn't mind staying in,' her son shook his head. 'He has a video and lots of films we could look at.'
'And what was Daddy doing while you looked at the video?' her question was made casually enough, although the twins' subdued behaviour disturbed her a little; they had become used to only seeing Brad occasionally over the years.
'He was—Ouch!' Kim grimaced, glaring at Andy, who looked suspiciously innocent all of a sudden. 'He was busy,' she finished awkwardly.
'What——-‘
'Would you mind if we went to bed now, Mummy?' Andy cut in firmly.
'Bed?' she repeated frowningly. 'But it's only a quarter past six.' And at least an hour earlier than the usual time she had to persuade them to go to bed.
'We're tired,' Andy insisted stubbornly.
'Well if that's what you both want…' She shrugged resignedly.
Although nothing was said as she bathed them and put them to bed Robyn couldn't help the concern she felt. It couldn't just be the prospect of Brad's absence for a few weeks that was maki
ng the children behave like this, something must have gone gravely wrong this weekend for them to be so subdued. Her own worry about this unusual occurrence of a weekend with their father returned with a vengeance, and she wished she had someone she could talk to about that worry; she wished she and Sin were still friends!
CHAPTER EIGHT
The cry and then the loud sobbing woke her instantly, and she hastily scrambled out of bed to run to the twins' bedroom. Kim sat up in the bed crying brokenly, Andy beside her as he tried to comfort her.
'Be quiet,' he hissed. 'You'll wake Mummy.'
'But I want her!' Kim howled, crying louder than ever.
'You'll only worry her,' Andy told her forcefully. 'Now be quiet, you little——'
'I'm already here, Andy,1 she interrupted him slowly. 'And I'm already worried.' She took Kim in her arms, tightening her hold as her daughter buried her face against her neck. The brief conversation she had overheard as she came into the room gave her a feeling, of unease; never before had either of her children shied away from telling her if they were troubled or upset about something. 'What's wrong, darling?' she smoothed Kim's silky hair.
'She just had a bad dream, Mummy,' Andy interrupted his sister with a fierce look at Kim.
'Andy!' Robyn quietly reprimanded before looking down at Kim's tear-stained face. 'Is that what happened, baby, did you have a bad dream?'
Kim glanced at her brother before answering. 'Yes,' she nodded.
Robyn wasn't at all fooled by that answer, and. she was determined to get to the bottom of their strange behaviour since they got home, was sure Kim's crying had something to do with that. 'Is that the truth?' she prompted softly. 'Or did something happen while you were away this weekend to upset you?'
Once again Kim looked at her twin for guidance. 'It was just a bad dream, Mummy,' she muttered.
She frowned, knowing she was being lied to. And it wasn't something either of her children usually did, making her worry all the more.
'Has Sin gone away?'
She was taken aback by the unexpectedness of the question. 'No…' she answered Kim dazedly.
Carole Mortimer - A No Risk Affair Page 11