Roberta Leigh - And Then Came Love

by Roberta Leigh

  Tears streamed down her cheeks and she swallowed convulsively.

  "Why are you crying?" he demanded harshly. "Isn't our reunion going as you planned?"

  "I didn't plan it!" she cried. "I came back because I wanted to, not because I'd thought it all out beforehand."

  - "What would have happened if Belle hadn't come to see you?" he asked sardonically. "Would you have gone on languishing in London, or was your vanity pleased to find no other woman meant anything to me?"

  "I didn't come back because of that, but because Belle said you — you still loved me," Stella dashed the tears from her cheeks. "I know you think I'm hard and cold, but I wasn't vain enough to think I still meant anything to you. After the way I'd behaved I thought you hated me."

  "And when you found I didn't — that I couldn't bear to touch another woman — you decided to come back and forgive me!" He gave a harsh laugh. "Well, I can do without that sort of forgiveness!"

  "I'm not forgiving you," she cried. "I want you to forgive me."

  "Me?"

  "Yes. Forgive me for the way I treated you… for being so bigoted that I couldn't admit I loved you. If you won't let me live with you again, at least try to stop hating me."

  "I don't hate you," he said quietly. "I could never do that."

  She waited, hoping against hope he would continue, but he said no more and, not trusting herself to look at him, she spoke again. "I'd be lying if I said that learning about Belle — knowing you hadn't… Of course it made a difference to me! But I'd have come back in any case. It might not have been today or even next week, but I'd have come back eventually."

  "Eventually," he echoed with heavy sarcasm. "When would that have been?"

  "When I had proved to myself that I could stand on my own feet. When I could show you I wasn't coming back because I needed your help." Still he said nothing and she stumbled to the door. "I shouldn't have come. Seeing me again has reminded you of things you'd rather forget I'm sorry, Matthew."

  "Wait a moment, Stella." His voice was a whisper. "There's something I'd like to know. People don't change because you want them to — that would be Utopia! And that's what I can't understand about you. Why should you love me now when you only despised me before?"

  "I never despised you!" She spoke to the door, unable to look at him. "On our wedding night I was afraid of you — that's why I was so cruel — and the night I found out about Belle…" She clenched her hands. "I was so hurt I just wanted to hurt you back."

  "You're forgetting one more night," he reminded her.

  "I can never forget that," she whispered. "It made me realise I could never belong to anyone except you." Nerving herself she turned and looked at him. "I didn't say anything cruel to you that night, Matthew, and I didn't go on fighting you either! From the moment you kissed me — held me — I tried to let you know I loved you." She lowered her head, her words almost inaudible. "I obviously didn't succeed."

  "Stella!" In two strides he was beside her, gripping her shoulders so violently that she winced. "Of course I knew! But I was afraid to believe it. I wanted you so much that I thought I'd imagined your response." One hand cupped her face, forcing her to look at him. "Why me?" he asked fiercely. "Why me when you can have Charles? He's your sort of person, Stella. He can give you everything you want."

  "I want you!" she cried.

  Still he hesitated. "There'll be no going back. If you stay now, I'll never let you go."

  "I won't want to. My place is with you. Hold me, Matthew. Hold me and say you love me!"

  For a long moment he looked into her eyes, then fumblingly drew her against him and rested his cheek against hers. "Don't you know you're my whole life without me having to tell you?" His voice was low and broken. "It was no good when you were gone.

  The factory, my home, my friends — they all meant nothing if you weren't here to share them."

  “I’ll always be here. You'll never be alone again."

  A shudder went through him and he held her so closely that she could feel the heavy pounding of his heart. "I still can't believe it… to have you say you love me… It's like a dream." He stroked her hair and then held her slightly away. "You've cut it."

  Her eyes crinkled. "I'll grow it again if you want."

  For answer he bent his head and pressed his lips to the lobe of her ear. "No," he said thickly, "keep it short. I can see more of you to kiss!"

  Twining her arms around his neck she pressed her body against his, "We've a lot of time to make up for, Matthew."

  "Don't remind me." He went to kiss her mouth and then stopped, his expression so dark that she was afraid.

  "What's wrong, Matthew? You look angry."

  "Only with myself. I wasn't blameless. I realise that. But this time we'll start our marriage properly. Jess will have to find a place of her own."

  "She's already told me she will."

  "Ah." It was a satisfied sound. "That's the main problem out of the way. The next thing is our honeymoon. Does Venice appeal to you?"

  "I don't need a honeymoon. I’m happy as-long as we're together."

  "No," he said firmly. "I want you completely to myself. Or does the thought scare you?"

  Stella put her hands behind his head and pulled it down until her mouth found his. "Does "this answer your question?" she asked against his lips.

  "It's a good beginning," he replied. "But I'd like a longer answer!"

  Blushing, she started to give it to him.