Inspired by her efforts, I stood up from the blanket and blew some bubbles. Then I chased them. Not only did I chase them, I squealed much like Callie and laughed as one of the bubbles popped on my nose.
Abby began to giggle, loud and long. It was such a beautiful laugh, one I’d never heard from her before. She gazed at me as if she was absolutely smitten.
The warmth that filled me inspired me to play some more.
I blew another set of bubbles and Abby pushed herself up to her feet. She waved her hands in the air as she stood unsteadily beside me. I blew some bubbles a little lower so that she could reach them. She stretched out her hand and just missed.
Then, as she reached for the next, she lifted one chubby foot and stepped forward.
“Oh my gosh, she’s walking!” I nearly dumped the bubbles in my rush to get to my phone. I couldn’t let Max miss this.
But the woman beside me put her hand on my shoulder and murmured in my ear. “Live it, don’t just record it.”
Chapter 30
Those words from a stranger drew me from my technological panic.
I watched as my little girl wobbled through a few more steps, then collapsed to her knees. Before I could even rush over to hug her, she’d gotten back on her feet to walk again. I thought my heart might burst with pride.
I couldn’t resist any longer and scooped her up in my arms. “You did it, baby, you walked. I’m so proud of you.”
Abby squirmed in my arms in an attempt to get to the bubbles. She didn’t care about being celebrated. She was determined to get what she wanted.
I set her back down on the blanket and blew some more bubbles for her. As happy as I was, my heart broke a little for Max because he hadn’t gotten to witness her first steps.
“Excuse me. I’m sorry, I’ve been a little rude. My name’s Gail.” The woman offered her hand to me.
I shook her hand, all the while really wanting to hug her for what she’d said to me.
“I’m Samantha.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Samantha. I hope you don’t mind me overstepping.”
“Not at all. You’ve given me great advice.”
“I’d like to give you something else too. When I saw your little one about to take a step, I recorded it on my cell phone. I know I said to be in the moment, but it was too good an opportunity for me to pass up. If you want to give me your e-mail address or phone number, I can send the video to you. I promise I’m not some crazy lady you met at the park.” She laughed.
“I don’t think you’re crazy at all. You’re amazing. I can’t thank you enough.”
As I exchanged phone numbers with her, I had a feeling that we might end up being friends. I looked forward to seeing her again.
Abby waved goodbye to the little girl as they left.
When Max returned a few minutes later, I held my phone out to him.
“Abby gave us a little present too.” I smiled and started the video on my cell phone.
“What?” Max gazed at the screen, then suddenly let out a whoop so loud that Abby and I both jumped. “She walked? You walked!” He scooped Abby up and paraded her around.
Abby giggled and clung to him.
I enjoyed the moment, then snapped a picture because it was too darn cute not to.
Later, after we’d arrived home, I gave Abby a bath while Max put the leftovers from our picnic away.
“She’s so tired.” I handed her over to Max. “Why don’t you two take a nap?”
“Aren’t you tired?”
“I am, but I want to update the blog too.”
“Okay, love. I could use some rest. Rescuing you from that clown was hard work.”
“I still haven’t forgiven you for that.”
“Oh, but you will—because you love me.” He grinned and kissed me.
“I do love you, and I’ll get my revenge.”
“I’m sure you will. I’m looking forward to it.” Max laughed.
After they were both asleep, I sat down in front of my computer and began to write about my experience that day. It had been an incredible milestone for my daughter but what I’d learned that day had been about something even bigger than that. I talked about sharing a moment, not just with the people around me, but with myself. It was a moment that I would have paid every dime in my bank account to have, and yet there it had been, free for me to take.
I’d discovered that I didn’t need mommy groups, because a mommy wasn’t who I was. I was still Sammy, the same person I’d been before I gave birth, only now I had a new role to fill.
All of the stress I’d felt while waiting for that instant mom mind to kick in had been wasted energy and wasted moments that I could have shared with my goofy, creative, perfectly imperfect child.
Yes, I loved her, more fiercely than I ever could have imagined. Yes, pregnancy had been a new experience that had taught me many things. Yes, giving birth and sharing my life with an infant had pushed me right out of my comfort zone.
But when my daughter looked at me, she didn’t look for perfection, or for some cookie-cutter version of what a mother should be. She just looked at me. She saw me in ways that no one else in my life ever would. And despite the long list of flaws I could recite, she raised her hands to me and her lips spread wide in a smile that told me she loved me—her perfectly imperfect mother—just as fiercely as I loved her.
Max had taught me what it was to be loved, but Abby had taught me what it was to truly love with no conditions or expectations. She had opened my eyes to the world, brand new and beautiful, and reminded me that life was to be embraced, not managed or controlled.
No matter what was to come next in our lives—a new book tour, travel, or just getting into an everyday routine—we’d become a family, and that was the greatest treasure I could ever have imagined.
Dear Reader,
The Single Wide Female and B.I.G. Girls Club books are written for every woman out there who has struggled with their weight, self-esteem and any number of issues that we all face as we work to become the best versions of ourselves that we can be.
They are meant to be light-hearted and fun, but I do hope that they will inspire you—to REALLY live your life to the fullest, loving yourself completely as you do so.
If you enjoy Baby on Board, I’d appreciate it if you would take a moment to leave an honest review.
And…
** I have a FREE book for you! **
Wanna know what inspired Sammy to write her bucket list? Visit my website below and get your complimentary copy of “Sammy’s Big Plan!”
LilliannaBlake.com
Enjoy!
Sincerely,
Lillianna
P.S. Also be sure to see the previews following this page for introductions to additional series by Lillianna Blake.
Coming Soon!
Toddler in Tow (Single Wide Female & Family, Book 3)
* To be notified, be sure you’re on the mailing list at LilliannaBlake.com
- Signing up for the free book there puts you on the mailing list.
Please enjoy the following preview for
To Love Again (Forty and Free, Book 1)
Chapter 1
Every wrinkle met its match with the firm pressure and glide of her palm. Even though there were very few wrinkles in the shirt, Nicole was determined to make sure that there were none. Her hand trembled as she swept it over the next wrinkle.
How was she ever going to accept the idea that her children now had another mother in their lives?
She glanced over at the suitcase beside her. It was piled up with more clothes than any ten-year-old girl could possibly need for a two-week trip. But Nicole needed for everything to be there. In the back of her mind, she recognized her attempt to prove that she was, and had always been, a good mother—but that didn’t stop her from smoothing out the last wrinkle.
She set the folded shirt into the top of the suitcase and stood up from her daughter’s bed.
So much had cha
nged in the last year in unexpected ways. Perhaps—as some of her friends claimed—she should have seen it coming, but she didn’t. Divorce had hit her like a freight train and plowed right through her happily ever after.
Only—if she was being honest with herself—it hadn’t been exactly happy, not towards the end, anyway.
She walked out of her daughter’s room and picked up a pile of laundry that sat outside her twelve-year-old son’s door. She wanted to make sure that it was clean before she packed it. Since he seemed incapable of actually putting his clothes in his drawers these days, she just gathered all of the clothes from the floor to wash them.
As she walked down the hall to the laundry room, framed photographs—hung exactly two inches apart—stared back at her. There was the photograph of her ex-husband, Jack, as he cradled Jordan the day he was born. Beside it, another photograph of Jack, with Melody in his arms.
Once they were happy—she was sure of it.
At the very top of the rows of photos was the wedding portrait. With eager smiles and much smaller waistlines, the shiny faces in the photograph looked foreign to her, as if they were people she’d never met.
She reached up and loosened the frame from the hook on the wall. It wasn’t right to have it there—not when he was so obviously moving on.
She dropped the laundry off and carried the photograph into her room—what used to be their room.
The moment she sat down and sunk into the familiar give of the mattress, tears stung her eyes. She looked at the picture for a long moment. It was really over now. There was no special cement to put together what had broken many years before, and the fantasy that there might be was gone too.
While Jack had been falling in love, she’d been struggling to deal with the notion of being forty-two and alone. While he was considering adding new babies to his life with his young bride, Nicole was thinking about menopause and whether or not to dye her blonde hair, which had began to sprout silver streaks of reality.
Time marched on, and she didn’t know how to catch up.
Before the tears could begin to flow down her cheeks, she took a deep breath and grabbed her cell phone from the charger on her bedside table. She logged into her new favorite website. It was a support group of sorts, but in reality it was a place for women to be honest—to talk about their fears and their joys, and, most of all, vent about life.
Forty and Free was a website that she’d stumbled upon while attempting to figure out how to react to her divorce. She enjoyed the sisterhood that she felt there and the lively debates. As her heart ached, she typed out a message to post. It detailed her ex-husband’s destination wedding, how excited her kids were to be part of it, and how alone she felt because of it.
When she posted it, she prepared herself for whatever responses she’d get. Within seconds she had messages of support from an assortment of women. What heartened her was the fact that these women weren’t all moms or all newly divorced. Some had been divorced more than once, some had been with their husbands from the time they were in high school and some had never been married. Everyone had their own view of what a relationship should be and no one was shy about sharing it.
As Nicole sorted through the responses, she received an alert about a private message from one of the women she’d became close friends with, Ella.
Cielo Spa & Resort! Trust me. Book yourself a room and have some fun. You owe it to yourself to get out of this rut, and see what the world has to offer. It’s the perfect time—with the kids away—to get to know yourself again.
Ella’s words impacted Nicole more than she would have expected. She typed a quick response to thank her friend and let her know that she would consider it, then she logged out.
Each message of support reminded her that her life was not over.
Just like Jack, she needed to find a way to move forward. She picked up the wedding photograph and carried it over to her dresser. With one last look she shoved it into the bottom drawer.
“That’s enough—enough tears, enough questions—just enough.” She closed the drawer and returned to the laundry room to get the load started.
No, it wouldn’t be easy, but she was ready to live again.
There had once been a time in her life when there were more important things than laundry and a broken dishwasher. A spark of eagerness drew a smile to her lips. Like an old but treasured friend, her desire began to resurface.
For many years the only question in her mind was about what she could do for everyone else in her life. She’d trained herself not to think about what she might be missing out on, or how she might prefer things to be. It didn’t matter what she wanted, as long as her husband and kids were happy.
That method hadn’t worked out very well. She’d sacrificed her needs, and in the end, her husband wasn’t happy. The family life that she’d expected to have had crumbled, no matter how hard she had tried to hold it together.
What was left was a lonely soul—long overdue for some real fun.
Chapter 2
Gavin Bell leaned forward in his chair so that his elbows rested on his desk while he spoke into the phone. “You’re not making sense to me, that’s all I’m saying. What I’m offering you here is a golden opportunity to launch your brand in a way that will get the attention of modern consumers. I understand that you promote tradition, and I assure you that we can create a mixture of tradition and modernization that will retain your current customer base as well as gain the attention of many other demographics. So what’s to lose?”
He pressed the phone closer to his ear and leaned back in his chair. As he listened to his client describe his apprehension, he smiled. He loved a challenge, and more than that, he loved creating solutions. Every time a client gave him a reason to turn down an offer, he enjoyed solving the problem.
“I hear you, I do. And that’s important to you too, isn’t it? If you agree to this deal, you have Gavin Bell on your side. I respect how passionate you are about your brand, which is why I intend to walk you through every step of the process. You will have a say in everything—before the posters go up, before the commercials get made, before the actors are even hired. This is your baby and I get that. All I want to do is dress it up a bit for you.”
He looked up at his computer screen for a quick review of the client’s information. He always kept personal notes about the clients on hand so that he could speak to them as friends rather than business associates.
“Great, Ted. You’re making a wonderful decision, which I can promise you won’t regret. Thanks for taking the time to talk with me. I’ll have my assistant fax you all of the paperwork by the end of the day. Give my best to Karen and the kids.”
He hung up the phone and pumped his other fist through the air in the same motion. The door to his office swung open and Lance Tavish stepped inside.
“How did you get here so fast to congratulate me?”
“I’m not here to congratulate you, Gavin.” Lance pushed the door shut.
Gavin arched an eyebrow.
Lance held his shoulders straight and his hands were tight at his sides.
“What’s wrong? I just landed Ted Bramley. We’ve been trying to get him to agree to a new campaign for over a year.”
“That’s great. It really is.” Lance narrowed his eyes. “But you’re not supposed to be here, are you?”
Gavin rolled his eyes up toward the ceiling and sighed. “I know, I know. But Ted was only in the country for a few days and I wanted to catch him while he’s here so he can sign all the paperwork.”
“There’s always an excuse, isn’t there, Gavin? I mean, there are people who would kill to have a boss that insisted they take a vacation.”
“And there are just as many bosses that would be thrilled to have an employee as skilled and dedicated as me.” Gavin rested his hands on his desk. “Why are you trying to force me to do something that isn’t necessary?”
“Because it is necessary. Because yes, you are my best asset, and
I want to keep you for as long as I can. You’ve been going full tilt ever since you left Amy—”
“—This isn’t about Amy.”
“Yes, it is.” Lance grabbed a chair and pulled it up in front of Gavin’s desk. “I’ve watched you for the past five years. You’ve done nothing but work. You don’t even bring a date to the office party.”
“So what?” Gavin cleared his throat. “I tried it once, it didn’t work out. I don’t see why that’s a problem.”
“Because one of these days it’s going to catch up to you, Gavin. It’s going to hit you in the gut and knock you back. You’re not getting any younger, you know. You’re losing your hair and your trim waistline.”
“Hey, I’m not losing my hair.” Gavin reached up and touched the waves of thick brown hair that rested on the top of his head. “Am I?”
“Even if you’re not now, you will be soon. You’re forty-four, Gavin. You know what comes next?”
“Forty-five?” Gavin smirked.
“Seventy. That’s what comes next.”
“I think you’re a little off on your math there.”
“I’m serious. You know how much I care about you. You can’t live your whole life like this. What will you have when you retire?”
“Lance, give it a rest, alright?” Gavin looked back at his computer screen as another e-mail from a client came in. “I have work to do. I can’t take a vacation right now. Besides, all I’m going to do is work at home. What else would I do?”
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