by Lan Chan
“Look at you!” Celine gushed. She caught my arms and raised them up, spinning me around so she could inspect her handiwork. “I had so many other embellishments I wanted to add but this will have to do with a week’s notice.”
For the sake of survival, I turned into a robot, not even bothering to argue with her when she insisted I wasn’t allowed to pay for the dress. In a blur, she wrapped it up in a beautiful white box and tied it together with a matching blue ribbon.
Feeling like I had an explosive about to go off in my chest, I was halfway out the door when I turned back. “Thank you,” my uneven voice said.
Her eyes were glassy. “Life is unpredictable,” she said. “We bend or we break. I don’t think you’re the breakable type, sweetheart.”
Maybe she was right. But for right now, I felt like I was coming apart. The next time I teleported, it wasn’t back to the dorm but to that remote mountainside that couldn’t be reached by anything but wings or teleport. Dropping the box on the pine-laden floor, I bolted to the edge of the cliff and stood there with my back turned to the sheer drop, my gaze locked to the spot where Kai had told me he loved me for the first time.
For just the smallest amount of time, I allowed myself to break. Even if it was temporary. I sank down onto the ground and cried until the sky turned dark.
Forty-Nine
By some stroke of mercy, for the week leading up to his bonding ceremony, Kai was absent from classes. I had stood in front of the mirror for half an hour psyching myself up to face him only to be informed by Tyler that Kai was too busy with bonding ceremony setup.
“Did you think he would be here?” Isla admonished. “After the bonding, the Laurents will probably force him to quit the elite guard. I bet she’s pregnant within the month.”
“If she isn’t already,” Orla piped up.
Both of them seared me with scathing looks but I just sat there with my robotic face on, completely tapped out of all emotion. I knew they did it simply to get a reaction.
“She’s dead inside,” Orla sniffed.
The MirrorNet had never before been such a no-go zone. To date, I was still receiving messages from people wanting to assure me that they would boycott the replay of the ceremony on principle. It would have meant more if it wasn’t just the replay they were boycotting. But it was much more than I had received before, so I took it.
Sophie was becoming more and more agitated as each day progressed. The calls I did take were from Giselle and Matilda. Giselle to inform me that the Sisterhood were prepared for whatever consequences might arise and to remind me to keep practicing my technique.
Matilda came up with the list of names that Ashton had passed on. “How many?” I asked.
“He had to open the search wider,” she said. “He included the inmates from the supermax prisons in the States. We’re looking at about two hundred thousand.”
The night before Kai’s bonding ceremony, I left the Academy. Taking the whole stash of remaining potion vials with me, I left Sophie a note to let her know I would see her at the ceremony. She would be pissed, but I didn’t have the wherewithal to argue with her at the moment. It felt like I had done nothing but argue with her since I found out about being sick.
Being away from her on the last night of my life felt terrible. Holed up in the Sisterhood compound, I wanted to do nothing but run away.
When I arrived, I was surprised to find Jessica in their midst. It wasn’t at all surprising to see Rachel, but it was the presence of the Evil Three that made me pause. “No,” I said immediately.
“Too bad,” Harlow said. “You can’t do this without us.”
“Yeah, I can. You’re nuts if you think you’re coming.”
Giselle crossed her arms over her chest. “They understand the risks. This isn’t daycare. They’ve been training for this their entire lives.”
“I highly doubt that.”
“Are you going to whine the entire time you’re here?” a new voice asked. I took a step back, holding the dress box in front of me as a stranger appeared in the doorway leading to the kitchen. A familiar warning signal went off in my brain, but I didn’t recognise the slim brunette who triggered it.
“This is Simone,” Matilda said. “You might know her from the attempt to steal your...Malachi’s soul.”
That’s where I knew her from. She had been the third member of the Sisterhood that night. Simone glanced at me up and down, nose scrunching. She had an expansive face that left too much space between her eyes. Her brow was prominent, as was her chin. It gave her a brutish look that fit perfectly with her chosen profession.
“Where have you been?” I found myself asking.
“Not slaving to the whim of monsters,” she snarked back. Then she pushed open the front door and disappeared.
We went through the game plan over and over again. And then Giselle made me practice unstitching her soul until I was able to do it with barely a thought.
Around witching hour, she made me stop. “You need to get some sleep.”
“I’ll be sleeping plenty soon.”
Yanking the demon blade from my grasp, she shoved me in the back until I started making my own way into the cramped house. “Even if that’s true,” she said, “you’ll be no good to anyone tomorrow if you’re tired.”
That wasn’t at all helpful when I stepped through the back door and into the kitchen to find everyone but Simone sitting around the table sipping dully from wine glasses.
Giselle narrowed her eyes at everybody. Matilda waved her off. “C’mon, G. It’s a battle tradition.”
“It’s how people get themselves unnecessarily killed. I’m not doing this if you’re all hungover tomorrow. I don’t know about the rest of you, but I am not going down because someone trips over their own feet.”
“Just one drink then before we hit the sack,” Matilda said. One too many in her case because her words were slurring. She filled two wine glasses while I went to clean the dirt off my hands. When I sat down, she pushed an overly filled glass in front of me. Knowing that I wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway, I picked up the glass and took a sip.
“Urgh, tastes like feet,” I sputtered. It felt sandy going down my throat.
“That’s how you know it’s any good.” Harlow clinked her glass with mine. Despite thinking that I wouldn’t be able to sleep, before I’d even had half the glass, my eyes were drooping.
“Jeez,” Matilda said to Giselle. “You weren’t kidding. She’s got a completely susceptible mind to influence.”
Yawning, I tried to peel my eyelids open. “What are you talking about?”
“Five, four, three...” Matilda said. I didn’t hear the last of it because I fell asleep.
Gasping because my airways were clogged with blood, I woke up dizzy like there was cotton wool in my head. The sheets were caked in blood. For a second, confusion made me sluggish. I lay on a single bed in a broom closet. It was small enough that I felt claustrophobic. The light coming from the window above my head as way too bright. It must have been noon at least.
Pressing my hand on the wall to help steady myself, I fished around in the backpack at the base of the bed for Sophie’s vials of potion.
Forcing the potion past my sticky, blood-spattered lips, I tossed my head back to swallow. As I sat with my back to the wall, somebody knocked on the door. “I heard banging,” Rachel said. The doorknob turned.
“Don’t!” I called out.
“Just making sure you’re not – holy shit!” she caught sight of my morning ritual.
“Shhh. Keep it down.” I got up on shaky legs. “I’m fine. It’s just a bit of a side-effect from speaking all those Angelical words.”
“This isn’t a side-effect!” she snapped. “It’s...I don’t know. But blood coming out from any hole isn’t a good sign.”
“Thanks for the visual. I’m okay, really. I just need to get cleaned up.” Now that Sophie’s potion had had some time to kick in, I was feeling better. Scraping the tip
of my teeth over my fuzzy tongue, I went into the bathroom and scrubbed myself raw. My illness was the cause of the bleeding, but I suspected the woozy feeling was from something else.
Downstairs, the others were rattling around in the kitchen.
“You drugged me,” I accused Matilda who was at the sink.
“You got it!”
“What gives?”
She turned around and ran a cloth over the edge of one of her hunting knives. “Come off it. You were so wired yesterday there was no way you were going to get any shut-eye. If it helps, I also put a little something in the other girls’ drinks as well.”
“No, it does not help,” Alison complained, coming into the kitchen rubbing her head. “What time is it?”
“Three.”
I balked. “Are you serious?” The party started at four with the official ceremony happening at six. My message to Sophie had said that I would meet her there at four sharp.
“You’re burning daylight standing there with your mouth hanging open,” Matilda informed me. Racing back upstairs, I scrambled to get ready. It wouldn’t matter that I was in a ball gown for the ritual. Nothing mattered except my conviction. Braiding my hair just to keep it out of the way, I went without make-up or any other embellishments.
My things were already packed from the night before. At the last minute, I replaced Morning Star with the heavenly blade.
I wrapped the demon blade inside its scabbard and left a note that it would be bequeathed to Charles after I was gone. With my throat feeling hoarse, I scampered downstairs.
Harlow’s jaw hit the floor when she saw me. “Nice ‘screw you’ dress!”
I bit my tongue because the next thing out of my mouth was that this was my burial dress.
The screen door opened and in walked Giselle, Jessica, and Simone. None of them were coming to the party. Only the Evil Three had been invited. “You ready?” Giselle asked me one last time as I handed her my backpack.
“No,” I answered honestly. “But it’ll happen anyway.”
“Don’t let those monsters get in your head.”
“I already have a monster in my head. That’s why I’m in this mess in the first place.”
I teleported the Evil Three to Seraphina. We landed in the garden at sanctuary. Fae lights hung in swooping rhythms amongst the tree branches and all along the paths. The scent of Arcana peppered the air between notes of lilac and peony. Music played in gentle strains in the near distance, undercut by the low murmur of conversation and laughter. Something tingled along my skin and caused the hairs on my arms to stand on end. Heady anticipating clung to the air like the still tenseness before a storm broke. It was as though the city was holding its breath.
There was magic in the air. So much that I was having difficulty separating what was there to protect us and what was being created by the presence of so many powerful supernaturals in one place.
Harlow whistled. “So this is the famous city of the Nephilim,” she said. In support of her statement, a squadron of Nephilim guards marched by, their golden armour gleaming in the moonlight. Every once in a while, a flash of colour would blossom in the air above us, revealing the arrival of another guest.
“Trust me,” I said. “It’s not all it’s cracked up to be.”
As we walked, the Evil Three moved to create a semi-circle around my back. It only managed to shield me until we reached the ballroom entrance.
Spotting Sophie and Diana, I raised my arm to wave, only for it to be caught in a big, tanned hand. “We need to talk,” Max’s voice rumbled in my ear. Plucking me straight out from between Harlow and Alison, Max dragged me away from the crowd.
50
My first instinct when faced with an enraged predator was to run. Unfortunately, Max enveloped the hand where Gabriel’s Key was adorned and scrunched it into a fist. “Try it and you’ll know the meaning of regret.”
“I think I already do!” I hissed, almost running because his gait was so long. “Can you let go? I can walk on my own!”
“Right,” he said. “Just like you can return a call?”
Instead of doing as I asked, he grabbed me around the waist, hoisted me over his shoulder, and barged into a building that looked very much like a military barracks from the outside.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I shouted when he finally released me. My head was spinning again from the flipped equilibrium. Max slammed the door shut. I spun around to come face to face with a thousand spears pointing right at me. An armoury. Fantastic. Stuck between a pointy end and a pissed-off shifter. I knew which I preferred. Making towards the spears, I tried to put some distance between us. In hindsight, a mirror call would have been preferable to this face-off with him now.
Free of the influence of my poisoned bond, Max was back to his golden glory. He was no less gorgeous than Kai in his own way. His fearsome expression clashed with the black suit he wore but was a perfect representation of who he was at his core. Danger lurking behind civility. I took a mental picture and held on to it. Then I realised that memory was for the living.
“Why are you smiling?” he snarled.
“Is smiling against the law now?”
He took a menacing step towards me. I straightened my spine and kept my eyes level with his golden orbs, not feeling much like accepting his dominance today.
“What have you done?” Max’s steps were measured as he came to stand two feet in front of me. Sensing that I was cornered, I forced my heartbeat to slow so that he wouldn’t feel my apprehension.
“You’ll have to be more specific.”
“Lex!” It came out as a roar that shook both me and the building. The fine hairs on the back of my neck stood on end. I crossed my arms over my chest.
“What would you like me to say, Maximus?” Keeping my tone light, I used it to try and temper the rage simmering beneath his human face.
“I don’t need you to say anything. Just undo whatever the hell you did to my best friend.”
“I didn’t do anything but break the bond. As I have every right to when I have no intention of going through with it. Like I’ve been telling everyone all summer. I’m sorry if that upsets you. But look where we are. Kai’s bonding ceremony. He’ll have a chance to have kids.”
“Screw kids!” A low growl began at the base of his throat. It was just about the last thing I had ever expected to come out of a shifter’s mouth. “Do you think that’s all he’s good for? Yeah, I know, he’s the last of his damn line. But so what? We can heal well enough on our own. Anyone who whines about it can come through me. I know you’ve taken most of the heat from those pissy Nephilim. But Kai doesn’t care about any of that. Do you know wanna know what upsets me? He was dead inside for so long after his family. And then you come along, and he had a chance to be happy. This bonding is complete bullshit. I really thought you of all people would have the backbone to stick with it. Are all you humans so breakable?”
I suddenly got the feeling that we weren’t strictly speaking about Kai and me anymore. “I’m not forcing him to bond with Chanelle,” I said. “There are a million girls who would cut off their right arm just for the chance to be near him.”
Before Max could have an aneurysm, or the shifter equivalent, I closed the distance between us and hugged him. He was so taken aback by the gesture that I felt his muscles grow taut around me.
“Promise me you’ll look after him,” I asked. He made an exasperated choking sound at the back of his throat. That was the precise moment when the door burst open and Sophie barged in.
“Okay,” she said, taking in the scene. “Whatever is going on here, it’s finished.”
In response to her measured tone, Max’s aggression hit the ceiling. “You walk in on me with another woman and all you can do is get all prim and proper?” he snarled.
She held out her hand for me. “Do I look like one of your harem?” she snapped back. I grabbed her and raced out of the room, chancing a bit of magic usage by throwing
a protection circle around us because Max let out a roar that fluttered over my skin in a turbulent scrape and made me want to pee myself.
“Wow,” I said. “You’re going to have a lot of fun with that.”
She whirled on me. “How many goodbyes is that now?” Her big, brown eyes moistened. “What are you doing, Lex?”
“I’m dying, Soph. If I don’t get them in now, what if I don’t get a chance?”
She stopped dead in her tracks. “You won’t. I’ll keep improving the potion. We’ll figure out some other way.”
I smiled at her. “I know you will.” It was the truth. She would try for the rest of her life if she had to. I just didn’t have that kind of time. So I brushed it off. “I just don’t want to have any regrets.”
One of them strode past me at that very second. Cassie marched through the courtyard in a golden dress that hugged her statuesque figure. Her nose lifted in the air when she saw me. Beside her, Maddison leaned in and said something. “Give me a second,” I told Sophie.
“Cass!” I had to speed walk to catch up to her.
“I don’t want to hear it,” she said without breaking her stride. Dammit! When had she gotten so tall?
“Can you please stop for a second?”
She halted, and I almost ran into the back of her. For a moment, her face softened when she took in my dress, but she slammed her iron curtain back when I tried to smile at her. “What?”
“Please don’t be angry with me.”
Her snort was so full of teenage derision. “Can you please not run away so that Kai doesn’t bond with that slimy bitch?”
“Cass –”
“Then I’m angry with you!” She turned and those long legs of hers carried her off before I could think of a way to make her stay.
“I don’t think anything is going to permeate her head right now,” Sophie said, chewing on her bottom lip. “She’s really upset. So is Astrid, by the way. She can’t even begin to understand how this happened and she’s terrified of what this bonding means for her friendship with Kai.”