“OK, what’s up?”
“Well, the other day when I was doing your laundry, I found something in your pocket. Do you know what it was?”
“Umm . . . no, I don’t think so,” he said, but he wouldn’t meet her eyes.
“It was a small plastic baggie with two white pills inside. What were they?”
Silence. He continued to avoid looking at her. He finally picked up a slice of pizza, but instead of taking a bite he plucked a piece of pepperoni off it and tossed it to Molly.
Renee waited.
Losing his nerve, he looked up. His face was expressionless, but his eyes were wide.
“Mom, I swear, I only took them once—and I got so sick I was going to flush them. Nate gave them to me and told me if I wanted to play varsity, I had to step up my game. He said those would help. Stupid, I know.”
His head hung low following his admission.
“Do you even know what they were, Robbie?”
“Something he got off the Internet. He told me lots of guys were taking them, and they weren’t illegal. But I felt so terrible after I took them. I swear I won’t ever take them again.”
“Robbie, do you have any idea how dangerous that was? And how stupid? Kids have died taking that stuff!” Renee’s voice rose with each word, and her teeth clenched. She was on her feet now, furious. She would have sworn he knew better. “When I thought you had the flu, were you sick from those pills?”
He nodded, eyes downcast now.
“Look, Mom, I swear, I won’t ever do something that stupid again. I already told the guy to forget it, I wasn’t going to buy any from him. He gave me a few to try. I honestly thought it was no big deal, until I got sick. I know you have a lot going on right now, and the last thing you need is me pulling a dumbass stunt like this.”
“I can’t just let this go, Robbie. That was a stupid, dangerous thing you did and you need to understand how serious it was. I’m tempted to go to your coach about this—”
Robbie’s head shot up and he started to protest, but Renee put up her hands and continued.
“I need to think about that. For now, you will do nothing other than go to school and practice. No computer other than for homework, and you’ll do that right here on the island in front of me.” She held out her hand over the kitchen island. “Give me your cell phone. You can have it back in two weeks.”
Robbie stood and took the phone out of his pocket. Renee knew this would be the toughest part of his punishment, but he at least knew better than to say a word about the inconvenience. He handed her the phone, red faced.
“Sorry, Mom. It won’t happen again.”
He headed upstairs, pizza forgotten.
Renee dumped it all in the garbage. She couldn’t eat a bite. The confrontation with Robbie had her shook up. Where had she gone wrong? Why hadn’t she taught Robbie not to do something so stupid?
No, this isn’t about me. It’s about Robbie and a terrible decision he made. The kids are going to have to start to experience the consequences of their decisions, good or bad, and I can’t always protect them.
Chapter 30
Gift of Hope
January sped by. Even though Renee was no longer going into an office every day, she tried to stay busy. She was having trouble getting traction. The episode with Robbie reminded her that life would go on and still be messy, and if she wanted to start making some life changes, she was going to have to fight to stay focused.
Renee spent Monday compiling her current year goals and Tuesday morning working on her monthly plan. By early Tuesday afternoon, she had her goals for that week committed to paper and got to work. Days flew as she started addressing the many areas in her life she wanted to change. She set appointments for doctor visits, for hair and nails; she promised herself a massage following her first job interview for a little additional incentive.
The one item she decided she couldn’t put off any longer was the call to Grant Johnson. His daughter’s medical needs had sounded urgent, so even if connecting with him scared the hell out of her, it was time.
Renee pulled out the letter Marilyn had given her at Christmas. Taking a deep breath, she punched the number for her dead husband’s long-lost twin brother into her phone.
An authoritative voice came over the line. “Hello, Johnson here.” Renee sensed the man was distracted and not happy to be interrupted from whatever he had been doing.
“Hello, Mr. Johnson, my name is Renee Clements. My mother-in-law, Marilyn Clements, recently gave me a letter you wrote her regarding a possible family connection.”
Following a long pause, the voice replied more hesitantly now.
“Forgive me, Mrs. Clements. I was working on something when you called, and then I was shocked to hear your name. I wasn’t sure if I would ever hear any kind of reply to my inquiry. You said Marilyn Clements is your mother-in-law? So did you know a man by the name of Jim Clements?”
“Yes, Mr. Johnson, I knew Jim. Jim was my husband. He’s been gone a long time, so you can imagine my utter shock when Marilyn passed your letter on to me. I didn’t know Jim had been adopted. His parents never told me until now. Jim never knew, either.”
There was another pause on the other end of the line. Grant Johnson seemed to be choosing his words carefully.
“First of all,” he finally said, “please know how sorry I was to learn that Jim died at such a young age. I can’t imagine how difficult that must have been for you. I feel a huge sense of loss, and I didn’t even know I had another brother—a twin, no less—until my mother made a death-bed confession to me. Part of me wishes she would have taken that secret to her grave, given I never even got to meet him. But if I am being completely honest, another part of me wants to hear all about him and the life he lived.”
“Growing up as an only child was sometimes lonely for Jim,” Renee shared. “He would have loved to have had brothers and sisters, but it was always just Jim and his parents. I met Jim in college, and we were married for ten years before he died. His illness was sudden and brutal. There wasn’t even enough time to explore possible treatments.”
“Mrs. Clements, what exactly was the illness that took your husband?”
Renee suspected this was the question that had plagued him since the day he learned he had a biological brother and that brother had died young.
“Jim died from complications associated with aplastic anemia. He went from being a healthy man to gaunt and weak in a matter of six months. He wouldn’t go to the doctor for the first couple of months because he thought it was just a bug of some sort. Once he did go, it took the doctors another couple of months to figure out what was wrong. By then, there was nothing they could do, and . . . he just faded away.”
Renee took a moment to compose herself, to swallow down the lump rising in her throat, and then asked the question she had been afraid to ask.
“Mr. Johnson, your letter mentioned your daughter was ill. Is she suffering from the same disease?”
“Please, call me Grant,” he replied. “Yes, unfortunately, Grace also has aplastic anemia. I’m a single parent. Grace is my only child. She was in her second year of college when she started feeling rundown and lost her appetite. At first we just thought it was the stress from her tough class schedule. But when she didn’t start to feel better after being home for a holiday break, I took her in to get checked. Luckily, the doctors were quicker to diagnose her than it sounds like Jim encountered. They were able to put her on a regimen to slow the progression of the disease, but she had to pull out of her classes and has been home with me for the past year. She was doing all right . . . until she contracted pneumonia this last fall. Now the medicine isn’t as effective at holding back the disease. Her only long-term option is a bone marrow transplant. Up to this point, we haven’t found a match. Everyone in our family has been tested, but . . .” His voice trailed off.
Renee’s internal debate fired up again. Can I do this again? Go back into a hospital . . . possibly relive wha
t this awful disease can do to a person?
“I am so sorry to hear your Grace has the same terrible disease Jim suffered from, and that you haven’t found a match yet. Back when Jim was sick, a transplant wasn’t an option for him. How do you test for a match?”
“A simple blood draw, initially. If a potential match is indicated, further testing is necessary.”
We have to at least try to help. I already decided.
“Jim and I had two children together. Could it be possible for Julie or Robbie to be a match for Grace, if you have your facts straight and Jim was your brother?”
“It’s possible. Would you be willing to have your children tested to see if they might be a match for Grace? I’m afraid we’re running out of time . . . they might be her only option.”
Torn between her natural inclination to protect her kids from further heartbreak and the anguish she knew she would feel if one of them were sick, Renee took a deep breath. “Yes . . . they want to help if they can.”
“Oh my God . . . you have no idea what a relief it is to hear you say that. I’ll contact Grace’s medical team right away. Someone will be in touch with the necessary arrangements—process, time, place. It can all be done in Minneapolis.” Since Grant and Grace lived a few hours away, they would have to plan when and where to meet in person.
“Thank you,” Grant said, his voice finally breaking. “Thank you so much.”
This is the right thing to do, we have to help, this is the right thing to do, Renee just kept telling herself as she ended the call and sank into a nearby chair.
Chapter 31
Gift of Distractions
Renee filled Robbie and Julie in on her conversation with Grant. She still worried a little it might be a mistake—Jim hadn’t truly been Grant’s brother, perhaps wasn’t even his blood relative, yet she was letting strangers into her children’s lives—but she knew there was no way Marilyn would have shared any of this with her if she wasn’t sure. This whole time Renee had thought reaching out to Marilyn over Christmas had been random . . . but maybe it wasn’t.
“Mom, we have to help. Even if it’s scary to get involved,” Julie reminded Renee. “I remember how sick Dad got—that was awful and . . . and scary.”
Robbie nodded his agreement. “Yeah, I don’t remember much except you crying, Mom, and that creepy cemetery. This is serious. I know if Elizabeth or Nathan were sick, we’d help in a heartbeat if we could,” he said, referencing cousins they’d known all their lives.
Julie’s class schedule was light on Mondays, so appointments were made accordingly. Grant called a few times, so appreciative of their willingness to get tested. He let them know he’d decided not to tell Grace about their newly discovered family yet; since none of their other family members had been a match, he didn’t want to get her hopes up until they were sure. He didn’t say it out loud, but Renee could sense he was concerned about Grace’s ability to continue to fight the disease if she didn’t receive a transplant soon. Regardless of how the tests came out, Grant and Renee agreed they would get the kids together.
They quickly learned from the initial blood draw that Julie couldn’t be a match—but Robbie’s results looked promising. More extensive tests were performed, but results wouldn’t be back for a week.
The week dragged on. Robbie kept himself busy with school and basketball, so Renee had more time on her hands. She continued to email Matt every few days, and they talked on the phone too. She welcomed his call when it came mid-week. She needed a distraction.
Matt seemed to need a distraction as well. Work was frustrating. There was an increase in drug-related cases on the island, but funds were limited and his team couldn’t keep up. He was worried about his dad, too. His widowed father was stubbornly trying to maintain his small farm. Neither Matt nor his sister were able to convince him to sell or even rent it out and move to something smaller. Matt also shared with Renee that he missed his sister and her kids. Fiji was a wonderful place to visit, but it was harder to live there, so far from home.
Wanting to enjoy the call, they moved their conversation on to more pleasant topics. Their usual fifteen-minute call lasted an hour. Both felt better by the end of the call and made a “date” to talk again. She might have felt guilty about the cost of these international calls if Matt hadn’t told her he switched his plan so the cost wasn’t astronomical.
Energized, Renee knew she couldn’t put off starting her job search any longer. She penciled out an updated resume and hired someone to critique and polish it. Originally, she thought she would be ready to start her job search once the holidays were over and kids back in school. Now it was late February, and she still hadn’t started. Her pride was still banged up from her abrupt layoff. In spite of her reservations, she committed to getting her resume out within the week—even though she couldn’t muster much excitement about the process.
Chapter 32
Gift of Courage
Robbie was a match for Grace.
The call came on Monday. The hospital called Renee first before letting Grant know, to give her and Robbie the opportunity to make a final decision as to whether or not to go through with the transplant. Bone marrow would have to be drawn, and it could be painful. Robbie and Renee had already talked about what they would do if he was a match, so Renee was comfortable telling the doctor they would go through with it. In turn, the doctor promised to call Grant, and his office would set up the necessary appointments. Easter was a few weeks away—they would schedule procedures so Robbie could recuperate when he had time off from school.
Not an hour had passed when the phone rang again. Renee snatched it up, still wired from hearing Robbie’s test results.
“Hello?”
“Renee!” a voice said. “It’s Grant! Just got off the line with the doctor.” She could tell he was trying not to shout in relief. Her mind conjured up a man looking very much like her dead husband, grinning from ear to ear, pacing as he clutched his phone. “I plan to explain this whole convoluted story to Grace tonight—that is . . . if you’re sure Robbie is still willing to go through with the transplant.”
“Robbie’s in school, so I haven’t had a chance to tell him the news yet, but he was adamant he wants to help if all the tests came back OK,” Renee confirmed. God, she squirmed, I hope he doesn’t chicken out. “I wish we could have told Grace together.” But even as she said it, she realized that was a bad idea, even if it would have been an option. Grace had been sick for a long time. Finding out she had cousins she never knew existed, and one of them was going to potentially be key to her recovery . . . that was going to come as quite the shock.
Grant interrupted her thoughts, graciously not mentioning the awkwardness of Renee’s wish. “I know she’ll be anxious to meet you, once she has time to absorb all of this. Renee, I know you probably feel like you’re going out on a limb here, helping complete strangers. My gut tells me this might just be the answer we’ve been searching for, and I can’t thank you enough.”
I pray you’re right, Renee thought, as they agreed to talk again the next day to start firming up logistics.
***
Renee picked Robbie up after practice, having stopped for his favorite takeout on the way to the gym. He would be a sweaty mess and not in any shape to go out for dinner after she shared the news. Instant burger and fries and a hot shower at home was the better course.
Seeing the food, Robbie immediately looked up at his mom, the question in his eyes.
A quick nod gave him his answer.
Robbie blew out a loud sigh, running a hand through his hair. Sweat made it stand on end. He stared out his window as Renee pulled away from the curb.
He finally said, “I figured as much. Man, gotta admit, I’m freakin’ out a little here. Jeez, Mom, what if it hurts? What if I can’t finish out my season?” After a brief pause, he continued, giving voice to the loudest question on his mind.
“What if we try to help . . . but she still dies?”
A heavy dose of reality for a teenage boy.
“We’ll do what we can, honey. After that, we leave it in God’s hands.”
Renee proceeded to update him with what she knew during the rest of the drive home. He didn’t say much more. He ate his burger, but the fries went untouched, along with most of his chocolate malt. Renee understood his hesitancy. She was just as scared about what the next few weeks would bring. Once they got home, Robbie let Molly out and then took her up to his room, saying he had homework. Renee jumped online to research the transplant information the doctor had mentioned earlier.
She printed some of it out, grabbed a bag of Oreos and a big glass of milk, and took it all up to Robbie—knowing her son, that burger hadn’t filled him up. He was lying on his bed, freshly showered and staring at his ceiling. Glancing her way, he sighed and pushed up to sit against his headboard. Molly was curled next to him, tail wagging at the site of cookies.
“Hey, Mom. Sorry . . . I’m just a little freaked out by all of this,” Robbie said. “Lots going on. I was so sure if either of us was a match, it would be Julie. Not sure why, I just didn’t think it would be me.”
“I know . . .” Renee began, but Robbie kept going.
“Now we know and I kind of wish none of this happened. A few months ago, we didn’t know Dad had more family or that we had a sick cousin. Now they’re gonna do God knows what to me.”
“Robbie, I know—it’s a lot. But we all agreed we at least had to try to help this girl. Now we know you may be able to do just that. I am so proud of you, Robbie, and I understand if it scares you some. Scares me, too. Scares me shitless!”
Robbie chuckled.
“But I know how I would feel, as a parent, if either you or Julie were sick. We haven’t talked about the fact both your dad and now a cousin had the same disease. That means you might be at risk to develop it. We need to find out more from the doctors. I’m sure they already checked your results for any signs—they would never let you donate if you had the same disease in your system—but the more we can find out about symptoms and treatments, the better. We need to know what we’re dealing with here.”
Whispering Pines (Celia's Gifts Book 1) Page 16