Tucker put his head in this hands. “I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing by staying.”
“Tell me what I can do to help you.”
Tucker sat up and looked at Mark. “I don’t know. I don’t even know how to help myself.”
“That’s an honest answer. I think the road to anything you want in life starts there. What if I found someone for you?”
“What do you mean? Somebody to talk to?”
Mark nodded his head.
Why not? He wasn’t sure it would help, but wasn’t Blythe worth the try? “Okay.”
“Is there anything else you want to tell me before we head back?”
“I’m sorry I left. I honestly believed I was doing the right thing for everybody. I didn’t know she was pregnant. If I had, I’d like to think I might’ve done things differently, but I can’t say for sure.”
“Another honest answer,” Mark put his hand on Tucker’s shoulder. “That’s progress.”
17
Tucker was still sitting outside, on that damned bench, when Jace came back. He didn’t care what his brother said, it was almost eleven o’clock at night. He’d pick him up and throw him in the truck if he had to.
“Still keepin’ the bench warm?”
“Nah. I’m ready to go.”
“You are? Why didn’t you call me?”
“I was enjoying the quiet a little longer.”
“Did you try to see her?”
“I saw her.”
“You did? Did she kick you out?”
“She was sleeping. I didn’t want to wake her. There’s time.”
Jace was as confused as he was impressed with Tucker’s attitude.
“Can we get something to eat?”
“Uh, sure. Renie fed me dinner at their place, but we can get you somethin’.”
“Anything is fine. I don’t care what. Then I need to sleep.”
Jace drove across the street, where there was an all-night deli. He’d reserved a room in a hotel not far from the hospital. Tomorrow, he planned to try again to get Blythe to talk to him. Even if she wasn’t ready to forgive Tucker, it was important to Jace that she know he hadn’t lied to her.
Once they were in the room, Tucker fell asleep before Jace came out of the bathroom. Fully-clothed, boots still on, stretched out diagonally across the bed.
It took Jace longer. He hoped his brain was fried enough that he wouldn’t dream tonight. He wanted to sleep like the dead, as long as his body would let him.
Blythe was finishing breakfast when Renie walked in the hospital room.
“Good morning!”
“Good morning to you, too. Where’s that sweet little girl?”
“With your mom. She’s practicing the grandma thing.”
Blythe laughed. “I wonder if she’ll let the baby call her grandma.”
“Your mom will come up with something more unique.”
Renie was right. Her mom would never settle for something as mundane as grandma. It would be as interesting to see what name she came up with for herself, as it would be to decide what to name her baby.
Oh God, she had to think of a name for the baby. Tucker should have some say in it, shouldn’t he? And what would the baby’s last name be? Would it be Cochran or Rice?
She hadn’t thought about any of this while Tucker was gone. It was far too complicated. Had she gone the traditional route, like Brooke had, she’d be married already. Her husband wouldn’t have left her for the first few months of her pregnancy, and she wouldn’t have to worry about what the baby’s last name would be. She hated to think Brooke was right about anything. But if she was here, Blythe would have to agree with her. Good thing she wasn’t. Blythe laughed.
“What?” Renie asked.
“I was thinking about the lectures Brooke would be subjecting me to if she was here.”
“Oh, gosh…” Renie started mimicking some of the things they both thought Brooke would be saying.
Bree arrived in the middle of it. “You two sound like Brooke,” she said, which made them laugh harder.
“Renie, I wish you could stay closer to home. You’re good for her,” Bree told her.
“I won’t be gone that long. I promised my mom I’d help when the baby’s born, but as soon as I can, I’ll come back. I promise.”
“Sorry to put a damper on the mood in here, since it’s so nice to see you having fun, but I’ve been asked to tell you the Rice brothers are downstairs.”
“Ugh, no, don’t be such a buzzkill.”
“Tell me how you’re feeling about them,” said Bree.
Renie pulled a chair over, closer to the bed. “I talked to Jace last night.”
“Yeah, and what did he say?”
“He didn’t know where Tucker was. You have to know that. He wouldn’t have lied to you. That isn’t who he is.”
“There’s a part of me that knows that, or at least wants to believe it. I’m just so mad at both of them. Sometimes I wish I’d never met either one of them.” Blythe stopped talking and rubbed her belly. “But if I hadn’t met them, I wouldn’t be having this baby, and right now, this baby is the most important person in the world to me.”
Bree was crying.
“Don’t cry, Bree! You’re gonna make me cry. And I’m not sad. I’m mad. If I cry, I’ll be pathetic. I want to be mean, and stubborn, and make Tucker Rice pay for…”
For what? For hurting her? Leaving?
“Do you want to see him?”
“I don’t know. I do, and I don’t. I’m mad, I’m not kidding about that. I’m hurt. And I’m scared.”
“What are you afraid of, sweetie?” Bree asked the question, but Renie reached out and took Blythe’s hand.
“That he won’t want to stay.”
“I don’t think it’s about want,” Renie said. “The key is in getting him to talk about the big secret he and Jace share. Obviously, there was another accident. I’m guessing that whoever the girl was, died in it. We’ve all figured out that much.”
“I would say you’re right,” added Bree. “But there’s gotta be more to it.”
“Get Tucker to talk, Blythe.”
“What if he really loved her? What if he loved her more than he loves me? Maybe that’s why he keeps leaving. What he wants is her, and he can’t have her because she’s dead. He thinks he wants me, but then when he’s with me, I don’t measure up.”
“No, that isn’t it at all. Not even close,” a male voice said.
All three of them had been so focused on their conversation, they didn’t hear the door open or Tucker walk in.
Renie released Blythe’s hand and stood. Bree stood, too. They both looked at Blythe, who nodded her head.
“What is it, then?” Blythe asked him.
Tucker took a deep breath, and sat down in the chair Renie left empty.
Jace was pacing when Bree and Renie got off the elevator.
“Is he up there?”
“Uh, good morning, Jace. How are you?” joked Renie.
“Yes, he’s up there,” answered Bree.
“How is she?”
“Mad at him, but willing to listen.”
“I hope he’s willing to talk,” added Renie.
Me too, thought Jace. Although Tucker wasn’t the only one who needed to talk. He needed to tell his brother the role he’d played in what happened that night. And after he did, he wasn’t sure he’d see Blythe, the baby, or any of these people again. If Tucker refused to forgive him, it would be Jace’s turn to leave.
Renie’s phone pinged, and she pulled it out of her pocket. “Oh my God,” she shouted. “My mom’s water broke. I’m here, and my mom is having her baby. Shit. What am I going to do?”
“I’ll drive you there,” Jace offered.
“You’re sure? I mean, should we drive? By the time I caught a flight, we could be there already. I’m so nervous. I have to pick up Willow. She’s with Paige and Mark.”
Jace chuckled. “Let’s get on the
road. The longer you stand here, the longer it will take us to get there.”
“Tell Blythe, will you, Bree?”
“Of course—now, go!”
“Call your mom, and tell her we’re on our way.”
“I’ll tell her to have Willow in the driveway, ready to go.”
“Thanks! Oh my gosh, my mom is having a baby.”
When they got to the hospital in Gunnison, her mother was still in labor. She hadn’t missed it. “Do you mind?” she asked Jace, handing him Willow, and running toward the delivery room.
“Of course not,” he answered, not that she could hear him; she was running as fast as she could.
“Okay, little girl, this is new for me. Let’s see what we’ve got in here for you to play with.”
Renie had two bags packed with stuff for Willow. She’d told Jace to leave one in the truck and bring the other one in. When Willow got tired, he could put her in the car seat, take her for a short drive, and she’d fall asleep. He laughed when she told him not to leave her in the car alone, and if they sat in the parking lot while she slept, to make sure it didn’t get too warm.
“She doesn’t have too much faith in my babysitting abilities, but we’re gonna be fine, aren’t we, Willow?”
Willow smiled and started babbling. She wanted him to read her a story; he understood almost all her words this time. He was making progress, or maybe she was.
Three hours and many snacks later, Willow screeched when she saw Renie walking toward them. “Mama mama!” she yelled and held her arms out.
“Well?”
Renie was smiling from ear to ear. “As she predicted, she had a little girl. She’s beautiful, Jace.” Renie had tears in her eyes. “I need to call Billy.”
“Right here, sweet girl,” Billy walked in as if on cue, and Renie threw her arms around him.
“Sorry I didn’t get here sooner.”
“It’s okay.”
“Mama cryin’,” Willow explained to Jace. “Mama happy dada’s here now.”
“Glad to see you were able to keep our baby alive, Rice.”
Renie slugged him. “Leave him alone. He did great.” She looked at Jace. “Thank you, I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.”
“My pleasure, and I mean that sincerely.” Jace ruffled Willow’s hair. “We had fun, didn’t we, Willow?”
Willow looked at Renie. “Had fun, Mama.”
“Hey, what’s her name?” asked Billy.
“Caden Avery,” Renie told them.
“Ah now, isn’t that a pretty name?”
“I should call Paige and Mark. And who else? There must be other people I’m supposed to call.”
“Didn’t she give ya a list?” Billy asked.
“You’re right, she did. What would I do without you, Billy Patterson?”
“You ain’t never findin’ out, darlin’.” He kissed her long and hard enough that it made Willow giggle and Jace blush.
Tucker wished Blythe’s gaze wasn’t quite so penetrating.
“I’m waiting,” she said.
“I know you are. This isn’t a story I’ve told before, Blythe. I’m trying to figure out where to start.”
“Start at the beginning.”
The beginning. That would’ve been all the way back to elementary school. The day the teacher announced to the class there was a new girl who would be joining them.
Her name was Rosa, and she was the prettiest thing he’d ever seen. Her last name was Rodriguez, which meant she’d be sitting right behind Tucker, since his last name was Rice. Jace sat in front of him.
He learned, over time, that Rosa’s family lived in Basalt, but since her mother drove into Aspen for work every day, they enrolled her in a school in town. Rosa never believed she fit in with the other students, who primarily came from wealthy families. Her mother worked for one such family, as a housekeeper. It wasn’t until they were freshmen in high school that Rosa began coming out of her shell, and that was after going to school with most of them for several years.
She was often off on her own, and Tucker watched her. He was the same way, sometimes anyway. There were days when he didn’t feel like hanging out with his friends, he wanted to get lost in his art instead. There wasn’t anyone he liked to draw more than Rosa. Her black hair and almost black eyes were such a contrast against her pale skin that flushed a pretty shade of pink whenever he talked to her.
“I want you to call me Rose,” she said to him one day.
“Why?”
“I don’t like Rosa. It’s too…ethnic.”
“But, it’s you,” he said. He ran his finger over her cheek when he said it, and she leaned her head into his hand.
“Rosa—beautiful Rosa. Please don’t try to change who you are. You’re perfect.”
She blushed again, and that was the first time he kissed her.
Her parents were very strict, and were opposed to her dating a boy from Aspen, but Tucker was relentless. He made excuses to come and see her in Basalt on the weekends. He sketched her all the time, and for Christmas, he gave her parents a portrait he’d painted of her. They accepted him after that, and while they were still very strict with her curfew, they did allow her to go out with him.
Rosa’s brothers didn’t like Tucker or Jace. They’d gone to school in Basalt and worked the ski area. Both Tucker and Jace were on the ski team, so they ran into them often. The day Tucker tried to start a conversation with one of them, he’d told him and Jace to leave his sister alone.
Tucker didn’t understand what he meant. Why had he said they should leave her alone?
“She’s got a mind of her own,” Jace said that day. Tucker pulled Jace away when it looked like a fight was brewing between him and Rosa’s oldest brother.
Jace’s reaction surprised him, and they argued. Tucker told him he could fight his own battles, and he didn’t need Jace to intervene. It was important to Tucker that Rosa’s family liked him, welcomed him, and accepted him.
It was one of the worst fights the two brothers had. Tucker could feel Jace’s anger, and he didn’t understand it. It didn’t make sense to him.
When they were in their senior year of high school, Tucker approached his father the night before Thanksgiving. He wanted to propose to Rosa on Christmas Day and wanted to marry her right after graduation. His father wasn’t opposed to Rosa, he told him. He liked her, but Tucker was too young to be married. His parents were in agreement that he should finish college before he thought about marriage. If he and Rosa still wanted to be wed then, they’d have his parents’ support.
Tucker was invited to Rosa’s house for Thanksgiving, and he went, hoping to have a chance to talk to Rosa’s father. If he agreed to let them marry, maybe he could get his parents to change their minds.
Rosa’s family was more against the marriage than Tucker’s parents. Her father told Tucker it would never work between them. They came from two different worlds. Once Tucker went away to college, he’d see that more clearly. Rosa would never fit in his world. Tucker insisted her father was wrong. The economic differences in their families didn’t matter, but her father was intransigent. He refused to discuss it further and asked Tucker to leave.
He was angry and didn’t want to upset Rosa, so he left. On his way to the truck, he saw one of her brothers standing not too far from it. He ignored him. With the mood he was in, getting into an argument would just escalate.
“Cabrón,” her brother said when he walked by. “Telling my father you want to marry my sister. You think Rosa loves you?”
Tucker kept walking.
“You think you’re the only pendejo who comes around to see her? You’re wrong, and you’re the same—assholes, both of you.”
Tucker knew Rosa’s brother was trying to rile him, but he kept walking. When he got in his truck, he threw it into gear and drove away, his tires laying rubber on the road.
He drove and drove that afternoon. He went up to Independence Pass and hiked to the top. He sat
there, trying to get his temper under control, until the sun began to set.
He drove back to Basalt then, hoping to talk to Rosa. He needed to see her.
When he pulled into the driveway, he saw two figures standing near the back shed. It looked like a man and a woman, in a heated embrace. He stopped the truck and climbed out, startling them. He heard Rosa gasp and realized she was with another man. She ran toward him, calling his name. He remembered backing away, turning, and getting in his truck.
“Wait,” she screamed at him. She reached the passenger door before he could lock it, and climbed inside.
“Tucker, please,” she begged. “Let me explain.”
“Get out of the fucking truck, Rosa,” he’d screamed at her.
She refused. “We have to talk,” she told him. “You don’t understand…I love him.”
Tucker couldn’t think straight. How could Rosa love someone else?
He told her again to get out of the truck. He looked up and saw the man walking out of the shadow of the darkness. If the man got any closer, Tucker was afraid he’d kill him.
“Get out of the truck, Rosa,” he screamed at her. “If you don’t, I’m leaving with you in it.”
“Do it, then,” she screamed back at him.
Tucker backed the truck out of the driveway and sped away. He didn’t look back, he didn’t see who the other man was.
“Tucker, I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
He didn’t want to listen. She was ripping his heart right out of his chest. He drove faster and faster on the winding mountain road.
He was going around a curve when she pulled at his arm. He lost control of the truck. It barreled off the road and rolled. He remembered Rosa’s terror-filled eyes boring into his.
“I looked at her, Blythe, right before the truck rolled. The look in her eyes…I’ll never forget. She looked at me like I was supposed to save her, and I couldn’t.
“She didn’t live, Blythe. And it was my fault. Do you understand? It was my fault. I killed her that night, the only woman I ever loved. Until you.”
Blythe nodded. “Go on, Tucker.”
“I had internal injuries that required emergency surgery, and I ended up in the hospital for several days. Her family came to visit one night, but waited until my parents left before they came in the room. Her father was in a rage. That I could deal with, but her mother—her rage was far worse. The things she said to me…I’ll never forget them.”
Kiss Me Cowboy (Cowboys of Crested Butte Book 3) Page 17