by Emma Lea
“I did,” she said. “I always ruin everything.”
“Nothing is ruined,” he said. “This is just us adjusting. This is just us figuring out how we fit into each other’s lives.”
Her eyes widened like she couldn’t quite believe what he was saying.
“I know you’re scared, sweetheart. I know that tonight was a lot more intense than either of us expected. Do you think you can scare me off with that little display?” He smiled at her. “I don’t scare that easily, babe.”
She rolled her eyes. “Maybe dating a therapist isn’t such a hot idea after all,” she said.
He laughed. His gut unclenched and he felt like he could finally take a deep breath. “Is that what we’re doing? Dating?”
Nadine got a vulnerable look in her eye again as she tried to read him. He bent down and kissed her, wanting to wipe away the look of uncertainty.
“Yes, Nadine,” he said when he lifted his head. “That’s what we’re doing. We’re dating.”
“You really want to date me?” she asked. “Even after all that and everything you know about me?”
God, this woman. Her brokenness stole his breath. He wanted to wrap her up in his arms and protect her from the harshness of the world. He hated seeing her fierceness dampened by fear and insecurity.
“I wouldn’t be here with you now if I didn’t want something to happen between us.”
“But it was meant to be a one-night stand,” she said. “A fling.”
“Maybe that’s what you thought it was going to be,” he said, “but I knew there was more between us than this one night.”
She searched his eyes and he could tell that she was deciding whether to rabbit away from him. He couldn’t let her do that. Not now. Maybe not ever.
“Look,” he said, using his calming voice. “I know this is a big step for you, so how about we take it a day at a time? No pressure.”
“I’ve never done this before,” she said softly.
“Never done what before, love?”
“Never dated before.”
“It’s easy,” he said as he slid back into bed beside her. He gathered her close to him so that she rested her head on his chest and all that glorious dark hair flowed over his stomach. “We talk on the phone. We text each other. You tell me everything you’ve eaten that day and I tell you about the stupid idiots that cut me off in traffic. We go out to dinner and the movies and maybe go and see a band or two. We come back here and we fool around and then we spend the night in each other’s arms.”
“That simple, huh?”
“We might fight on occasion,” he said, his tone conciliatory. “But then we make up and of course. Make up sex is the best.”
She giggled against his neck and the last of his tension leaked away.
“So what do you say? Nadine, will you be my girlfriend?”
“Girlfriend,” she said the word slowly like she was testing it out on her tongue. “That would make you my boyfriend.”
“Yep,” he said with a satisfied smirk.
Nadine tilted her head so she was looking up at him. “Okay,” she said quietly.
He rolled her underneath him and kissed her. “Let’s make it official,” he said, his voice husky.
Chapter Five
Gabe whistled as he walked into the building where his office was located. Whistled. He couldn’t remember the last time he had woken up feeling so… happy, content, at peace? He didn’t know which word to use, all of them probably. Spending the night with Nadine was more - more fun, more sexy, more everything - than he had ever expected. And the best part, the part he had never even imagined happening, she had stayed. All night. He had woken up with her burrowed into his side and it was the best feeling in the world.
Gabe knew it was not going to be an easy relationship, but he didn’t care. Nadine was worth it. There was something about her that drew him. She fit with him, despite all her issues and the tragedy of her childhood. He liked the way she felt next to him. He liked the way she fit into his arms and molded to his body.
Amaya was waiting for him as he stepped off the elevator. She leant against the doorjamb of their suite of offices with her arms crossed over her lean body and an expectant look on her face. There was no hiding anything from his twin. He didn’t know how, but she always knew everything that was going on in his head. He wished the mind-reading ability went both ways. Sure, there were times when the ‘twin-thing’ tingled in his mind and he knew that she needed him, but he wasn’t privy to her private thoughts as she seemed to be with his. Besides, wasn’t the whole ‘twin-thing’ only supposed to affect identical twins? He sighed. It didn’t matter. There was no way he was getting out of the inquisition that was coming his way.
He smiled brightly. “Good morning sister mine,” he said brightly.
“Brother mine,” she said in reply. “Do you have a minute to chat?”
“You know I always have time for you,” he said opening the door and indicating she should enter first.
Most people looked at Gabe and saw a straight-laced guy who never got into trouble. The fact was that Amaya had never let him get into trouble. She had like, a homing beacon for him whenever he might have even thought about stepping off the straight and narrow. She had kept him out of trouble all through their teenage years, even going so far as to tell on him to their parents if she got even a whiff that he might be about to break the rules. He loved her dearly, but sometimes it would be nice not to have your conscience be a live, breathing human. His college experience would have been a lot different if he wasn’t one half of a set of twins.
He stepped in front of her to unlock his office door and ushered her in. There was a Keurig coffee machine hidden behind a panel in his wall of bookshelves and he popped in a pod to pour himself a cup. Amaya only drank herbal tea, one of which she had in her environmentally friendly travel mug in her hand. She sat on his couch, her long, flowing skirt spread around her and her sandaled feet poking out from underneath. Her hair was in a long braid which she pulled over her shoulder as she adjusted her glasses to watch him.
He took his time. He was in no rush to have this conversation with her because he knew exactly how it would go. He tilted his head to the side. Huh. Maybe he did have a bit of that whole ‘twin-thing’ because he could definitely read the disapproval coming off her in waves.
He walked over to his usual seat by the couch and sat, setting his coffee on the little table beside him. He steepled his fingers under his chin and waited.
“So, Nadine,” she said without preamble.
He didn’t say anything. It was easier if he just let her get it off her chest. Amaya was a few minutes older than him and she took it as her personal responsibility to pull out the big sister card whenever she thought he was being an idiot.
“The situation concerns me,” she said, “especially after what happened with Jeanie.”
He raised his eyebrows. “This is nothing like what happened there,” he said.
“Maybe not,” she conceded after a moment. “But I’m still concerned. You are a classic white knight, Gabriel. A rescuer. You are drawn to the wounded and broken and Nadine is definitely wounded and broken.”
“We’re dating,” he said. “I thought you might want to know that before you go any further and say something that might be awkward.”
She pressed her lips into a thin line. “It was only one night,” she said softly.
“And what a night,” he said with a grin, and she rolled her eyes.
“You know Jeanie’s missing.”
He sighed. “Yes. Detective Ramirez called me last night and explained the situation. It’s unfortunate, but not the end of the world. She’s been missing for three weeks, if she was going to do something, she would have by now.”
Amaya didn’t say anything, she just watched him with too-knowing eyes. “You underestimated her the first time around,” she said eventually. “Jeanie twisted you around her little finger and you ended up in hospital
.”
“And that situation has nothing to do with what is between Nadine and me. Nadine is not Jeanie. I was not sleeping with Jeanie. There was nothing between us beyond me being her therapist. She was the one who built it up in her own mind and had delusions of more. You know all this. You know me.”
Amaya sighed. “I do know you,” she said, “which is why I’m concerned. Nadine is a troubled young woman and I think it is a very bad idea to get involved with her.”
“I disagree,” he said, anger making his voice clipped. “I think it is a great idea to get involved with her. She is bright and fun and I like spending time with her.”
“It was one night, Gabriel,” Amaya said, exasperated. “You are still experiencing the orgasm high. I’m just concerned about you.”
Gabe stood. “Thank you for your concern,” he said, his voice hard. “But I am a grown man and if I want to pursue a relationship with a woman, then I think that decision should be mine and not yours.”
“She’s a patient—“
“No, she’s not a patient. Not anymore.” He ran a hand through his hair. “Look,” he said, softening his tone. “I know you’re worried, but I’m a big boy and I know what I’m doing. Besides,” he paused and smile crept across his face, “I really like her. A lot.”
Amaya looked at him with a worried frown and then shook her head, the expression clearing and a small smile taking its place. “You like her, huh?”
His grin widened. “Oh, yeah.”
Amaya stood and walked over to him to envelope him in a hug. He wound his arms around her, hugging her back. He understood her concern, but he knew this thing with Nadine was more than just a fling or an infatuation. It just felt so much bigger than any other relationship he had been a part of, even if it had only been one night.
“Just be careful,” Amaya said. “You have a big, soft, generous heart and I don’t want to see it torn apart.”
Gabe dropped a kiss on her temple and gave her an affectionate squeeze. “I love you ‘Maya.”
“Love you too Gabe.”
Gabe had worried that he would be distracted all day thinking about Nadine. Surprisingly, that didn’t happen. The day flew by and before he knew it, it was time for his lunch break. He paced around his office, doing a few stretches. Sitting around all day listening to his patients was not great on the posture and he needed the hour a day he spent on the treadmill to keep his body from turning to flab.
He walked over to his desk and opened the drawer, removing his cell phone and turning it on. He always made a point to turn it off during his patient contact hours. If he knew it was off then he wouldn’t be distracted by it wondering if someone was calling him. His patients knew to use the office phone if they needed to speak to him urgently. His phone beeped with missed call notifications and he scrolled through them, his brow furrowed. Why would Dre Studios be calling him?
He sunk down into his desk chair and hit the redial button. A quick conversation with the receptionist and then he was being put through to Derek Eckles, the owner of Dre Studios and Nadine’s boss.
“Dr. Rousso,” a deep voice said as the line connected.
“Mr. Eckles,” Gabe replied cautiously.
The other man laughed. “Please, call me Derek. Mr. Eckles is my old man.”
“Okay, Derek. Please call me Gabe. What can I do for you?”
“I’m calling about Nadine.”
Gabe sighed. “You know I can’t tell you anything about what we spoke about in our sessions,” he said.
“No, I know that,” Derek replied. “That’s not why I’m calling.”
Gabe’s gut clenched. Had Derek found about what had happened between Nadine and him last night? God, he hoped not. He didn’t have a problem with people knowing they were seeing each other, but he didn’t expect to be having the conversation with her boss.
“I’m actually calling because, as you know, Court’n Jacks are going on tour soon. It’s just a short tour, just three cities, in preparation for their longer tour in a few months. My concern is that it was this very situation that led to Nadine’s issues during the summer. I know she has had therapy and by your recommendation is doing better, but I am still concerned for her.”
“If you’re asking whether I think the stress of the tour is going to be a problem, I can’t really answer that. Nadine is definitely in a better place than she was in the summer, but until she is put in that situation again, no one knows how she will respond.”
“I know,” Derek said, “which is why I have a proposition for you.”
Gabe leaned back in his chair and crossed one leg over his knee. “Go on.”
“Look. I don’t know if you have had much to do with the recording industry but I want to assure you Dre Studios is nothing like what you hear about the big labels. I see my recording artists as friends and partners. My concern for Nadine is exactly that - concern for her well-being. Court’n Jacks has the potential to be a band to be reckoned with, but I don’t want that for them if it is going to be detrimental to Nadine. Her health comes first.”
“Okay,” Gabe said slowly, not exactly sure where he was going with all this.
“So, this is where my proposition comes in. I want you to go on tour with them.”
Gabe sat forward. “You what?”
“Hear me out. From your report I can tell that Nadine responded well to you. I know there is shit in her past that messed her up and I’m not asking you to tell me about any of it. But what I see is a troubled young woman who finally found someone who she could open up to. I just think that having you on tour with her would go a long way to helping her adjust to the situation.”
“I don’t… I can’t…” Gabe was genuinely at a loss for words.
“I know it would be awkward for the whole team to know that you were there as her therapist, so I thought that maybe we could give you another role so that you could be there but no one would have to know why.”
“Um… I met the band last night,” Gabe said.
“I know,” Derek said. “Nadine introduced you as a friend, didn’t she? She didn’t tell them who you really were.”
“No,” Gabe replied drawing the word out as he tried to gather his thoughts.
“Here is what I was thinking. I can put you on their bus as a personal assistant of sorts - a gofer. It would keep you close to them, close to Nadine, and no one would have to know that you are really there to keep an eye on Nadine.”
“And what about Nadine?” Gabe asked. “How are you going to explain it to her?”
“I will tell her the truth,” Derek said. “I want her to be okay with this. I don’t want to force it on her. I think it will be good for her to have someone she can talk to who isn’t in the band or related to her and I think she would agree.”
“I’m not a baby-sitter,” Gabe said. The idea of going on tour with Nadine had appeal, if only that he got to spend more time with her, and he did see the merits of Derek’s plan. But he had other patients and appointments he would have to reschedule.
“I’ve already spoken to your boss,” Derek said.
The man thought of everything.
“Then I guess I don’t have any say in the matter,” Gabe replied. “I do have one stipulation, though.”
“Anything,” Derek replied.
“I want to be there when you speak to Nadine.”
“Done. The band is playing at the Red Boot in a couple of days. Be there and I’ll introduce you to them all and inform them that you’re joining the tour.”
“But we’ll be speaking with Nadine before that, won’t we?”
“Of course. I have a meeting with her this afternoon. Four p.m. You know where my studios are?”
Nadine slipped into a seat in the same little coffee shop where she and Gabe had been the night before. She’d found it a couple of weeks ago and liked the vibe it had. Casual, good coffee and not too many hipsters with their frou-frou lattes and mocha-I-don’t-even-like-coffee-drinks. It also wasn’
t filled with all the Stephen-King-wannabes with their laptops and tortured looks on their faces as they tried to bang out the next great American novel, like at the local Starbucks. In saying that though, she had been coming here to write. By hand. With a pen and a notebook. Songs, not novels.
Stevie and Jace were the band’s songwriters. They usually didn’t even consult with Nadine and Vanessa until a song was ready to be arranged. Even then Jace usually took the lead and barely listened to anyone else’s suggestions. He was a genius, she couldn’t dispute that, but she also wanted to be included, not just dictated to. Not that she was ready to share her songs with anyone else yet. She had started doing it in rehab. One of the doctors had suggested keeping a journal but when she tried that all that seemed to come out were song lyrics. After a few nights she found that it helped. She slept better and woke up with a more positive outlook if she managed to scribble out her frustrations in that little notebook before she went to sleep.
Now she continued the habit, only it had morphed into something more. It wasn’t just an end-of-the-day thing now. She could be walking down the street and something would catch her eye and she would find lyrics floating through her head. Now she carried a little Moleskine notebook and pen with her all the time so that she could catch those unguarded moments. She had also begun to make it a habit to come to this coffee shop and spend some time in dedicated songwriting. Just to hone her craft. You know, in case one day she might actually be brave enough to share one of her songs with the band.
“Oh hey,” a voice said and Nadine looked up from her notebook.
“Hi,” she said, her brow furrowed.
The waitress laughed. “Sorry,” she said with a shake of her head. “I served you last night.”
Nadine nodded. “Oh, that’s right. You’re working again today?”
The waitress rolled her eyes. “Yeah. Someone called in sick so they asked me to come in. No boyfriend today?”
Nadine shook her head looking back down at her notebook. “No, he’s working.”