“Forever,” he breathed into my neck. The warmth forced me to fight a shiver.
“Forever,” I promised.
He kissed my neck a few more times and inhaled deeply before biting into my skin. The pain was so intense I scratched him, causing him to bite harder and the pain to increase. I cried out and gripped his shoulders from under his arms and waited for the pain to subside.
“Are you okay?” he asked in a shaky whisper.
“I'm perfect,” I said.
He chuckled, then resumed kissing me and making love once more.
***
The sun started to lighten the sky outside my room, the light filtered in lazily as a breeze caused the curtains to dance along the floor. I studied the contrast in skin tones between our arms. His pinned me against his torso and refused to let me budge at all since falling asleep. I had different emotions ranging from pure elation, contentment, and apprehensiveness swirling within me. The elation was due to finally feeling like I was where I belonged. Content, because I wouldn't mind if I never left this bed for the next hundred years. And apprehension because I was scared about the changes that were taking place in my body and worried about the company that had Marren on edge.
I started tracing the length of his arm with my finger, moving along the creases of his hands and over the bumps of his knuckles. He squeezed me tighter, pulling his other arm around me from under my neck and then kissing my shoulder. I felt my body's excitement grow with his touch. So easily he had me willing to give myself to him again. All with just a tiny touch.
I rolled over to face him, draping my arm over his side and satisfying my craving for his kiss. He chuckled again and it forced me to pause and feel the way that my heart danced. “I don't know if I will ever get used to that.”
“I hope not,” he said.
“You know what I’m feeling?”
He smiled. “Yes. It's what happens when my kind finds the person they were meant to be with. Their heart dances when they hear their love’s laughter.”
“Does yours do it too?” I asked anxiously.
“Yes. But it also cries when you're in great emotional pain.” His eyes darkened and I realized then that his thumb was grazing the top of a scar.
“How long have you felt this?”
“Since the day you breathed your first breath.”
“That must have been miserable for you.”
“Only because I couldn't comfort you. It's all I wanted to do, but you had it in your mind that I was nothing but a dissident seducer—I believe that was the term you used.” He squeezed me, holding me close to him while he rolled onto his back. “How did you sleep?”
“I slept like last night had to have been, by far, the best night of my existence.”
“It was for me too. I've been waiting for this for a while. How badly did I hurt you?”
“You didn't...not really. How badly did I scratch you?”
“You didn't. They're already healed.” He smiled at me.
“Well, at least I know I will always have your smile if the sun dies. And if we’re keeping track, you did seduce me.”
“Gvgeyu, waya uwoduhi.” The words flowed effortlessly off his tongue as he moved my hair to my back.
I smiled, enchanted by his words. “What does that mean?”
“It's the language of the therianthropes and means something like I love you, but much deeper than the human connotation.”
“It's...very beautiful. And A'lainn means beautiful?”
“No.”
I looked at him. Confused, I said, “Enid told me—”
“Enid's native language is different from mine.”
“Isn't he a werewolf also?”
“Everyone under this roof is, or will be as soon as you complete the change.”
“When will that be?”
“On the first night of the blue moon, because that is when the pull of energy is the strongest, which can mean waiting quite some time before it happens but then it's much more intense and unexpected. After the first time, you will be able to change every night except during dark nights.”
“When is the next blue moon?” My voice cracked leading on to my fear.
“Officially, we are already in it so I don't know when you will change. You won’t be alone; I’ll be here with you. Meanwhile, we have training to do.”
He rolled me onto my back again. A giggle burst out of me. His lips brushed my neck, moving slowly towards my mouth leaving kisses every so often. His hands clung to mine, pinning them to the bed on either side of my head. Fire filled my veins again as my body anxiously anticipated him. All this dissolved the instant a knock filled the room.
Marren dropped his head to my chest and said, “I'll be right back.”
I watched as he pulled on his pants, tied them, and slipped on his shirt. Then, he walked to the door. I pulled the sheets and blanket up over my body even though I was sure no one would see much. I heard the door shut followed by some raised voices in his native language.
I decided to climb over to the bench where my robes waited for me and pulled them on. I waited near the door, listening as the shouts moved further down the hall. I turned the handle, the door opening easily this time. A clank against the other side of it drew my attention to my sword, resting in a sheath and belt, with a note attached to it that read, You were busy, so I sharpened it for you. I hope you find it to your liking. ~Enid.
I grabbed the sword and placed it around my waist while quietly moving down the hall towards the corridor. I stopped and slipped against the closest wall when I heard a voice I didn't recognize.
“We received word recently that you, Master Marren, were the one that stole from me.” The voice belonged to a woman and sounded like she was used to commanding and getting her way.
“Your word is wrong,” Marren spat.
“Oh, but I'm quite confident you have my property and I'm willing to give you the chance to return it to me, in exchange for me keeping your little secret.”
“What secret?” Marren's voice became indifferent.
“You know the laws that govern this world and forbid your kind from being on this realm, as well as I do. But, I'm a woman of business and will...forget this indiscretion on your part.”
I pulled my hood over my head and stepped closer, wanting to know who it was that threatened Marren. A woman stood an arm's length from him with her back towards me. Her hair was covered by a scarf of purple silk. She wore a long black dress with a matching purple sash. There were small dangling beads hanging from the seams that caught the light from the sconces. Enid stood behind Marren with his hood drawn over his head and arms crossed over his chest. A few servants stood by, nervously watching the standoff.
“I have no idea what you are referring to,” Marren insisted. “As I've already told you, I have nothing that belongs to you. But perhaps you could tell me who it was that told you these things? I can possibly clear up this misunderstanding quickly.”
“My word comes from an anonymous source.”
“Again, I've nothing that belongs to you, so if you don't get yourself and your bandits off of my property, I will not hesitate to use force.”
“Master Marren, you underestimate me. You killed a few of my men and took a girl. I want her back. She is my property. I paid for her legally. Do you really want to pick a fight?” She laughed through the last incredulously spoken word.
I climbed on top of the railing. I saw Marren's lips press firmly together then give me a slight nod. I dropped down, landing into a squatting position with no more than a shallow thud. The woman's head turned to her side. I stood up as she snapped her fingers on her right hand. Two men appeared from behind, trying to grab ahold of me. I slipped out of their grip easily, pulling on my sword. Out of the corner of my eye, Enid approached, sword in hand. The two men stood back with their hands held up, palms forward. Their eyes were wide with fear while they took slow and steady steps towards the door.
“I see we are
done here,” the woman stated flatly. “You,” she turned her head towards me, “you are mine.”
“I'm nobody's property. If I were you, I'd go get my money back.”
Her bright blue eyes glowed as a smile stretched across her lips revealing perfectly white teeth. She took a step towards me. I quickly held the point of my sword to her throat. “I believe you were asked to leave.” Her smile widened with a threatening laugh getting caught in her throat. I didn't falter. I refused to be the one to back away.
“Very well, you've made your decision.” She turned, rapidly yet gracefully, the skirt of her dress continued to twirl around her as she stepped out of the door with her two cowardly henchmen following behind.
As soon as the door closed, Marren stepped up to me. “You must really like trouble.”
“Why? What did I do wrong?”
“Do you know who that woman was? She's the Mistress of the Cyrs, Relena! She knows about us, we could have half of the continent at our front step because you made an appearance.”
“Listen Marren, I don't know what you were expecting, but I don't just sit around and wait. I do anything I can to help, which is what I thought I was doing,” I snapped.
“Just go back to your room and wait for me there. Please.” He turned his back to me, approaching the servants that still watched with wide eyed horror.
I sheathed my sword, rigid with anger. I glanced towards Enid. “Thank you for bringing back my sword and being the only one to have my back.” I glared at Marren who heard my words. His eyes were on fire. I held the satisfaction inside me knowing that I burned him just as he had burned me while I stomped up the stairs, making my way back to my room.
***
The view from the balcony brought me calm. Something about the look of the mountains that stretched towards the sky high above the trees brought some calming perspective to me. Even after nothing else helped. I must have stomped the span of the room a hundred times before going out there. And yet, thinking about the way Marren reacted to me made no sense. It still burned.
I wanted to get away and be alone, outside of four walls for a while. I peeked over the ledge and judged the distance between the balcony and the ground. If I made the jump to the corridor floor fine, I could make the jump to the garden as well. At least in theory.
With not much more thought going into it, I climbed onto the stone railing, sitting on it instead of standing and took in a deep breath. The sound of my door opening and my need to escape for a little while urged me to push off of the balcony. I landed with a sharp, shocking pain shooting up to my knees, but I made it. I laughed to myself, satisfied in my own little feat, then I took off running into the forest. After making it through the trees, I turned and saw Marren looking over the balcony with a sad expression on his face. I suddenly felt horrible and considered walking back, but was too stubborn to do so. Instead I stood there, standing like a mindless dope, watching Marren scan the trees for me. I couldn't move further away from him. I felt like I was glued in place. Then he walked back into the room, releasing me from my guilt and allowing me to move.
I had it in mind to find the field of tulips. Something deep inside told me that he wasn't one for standing around and waiting either so, what better place to find me than in the tulip field? I kicked myself for not using the path when I first ran into the trees because now I was having a hard time finding it. In the process of wandering, I became increasingly worried that I was going to get myself turned around. I didn’t want to end up changing alone, in the middle of the forest, far away from Marren.
My heart thumped heavily at the thought of his name. The mere idea of his touch forced me to pause. I gripped a tree trunk, hyperaware of the tiny ridges in the bark and the small raises in the width. The smells of the forest became more potent and different from each other in ways I didn't know possible. Each scent stood on its own instead of mingling to form one combined scent. I smelled the dirt, the grass, the trees, the sticky sap, and the ferns. I smelled the musk of squirrels and the dusty scent of birds. I even smelled the soft sweet scent of the tulips.
My heart lurched forward excitedly. I knew it must have been a level of the change that I was experiencing. It was intoxicating, like it felt when escaping the guards. The possibility of being caught and the incomparable feeling of avoiding that fate.
I followed the scent of the tulips, luring me just until, between the span of trees, I saw a sheet of red floating on a light green blanket. I raced towards the field, relishing in the joy of finding it and not getting lost.
I crossed the first row into the field and let my hand gently rest on a few of the tops. I walked slowly towards the center, wondering how our dance didn’t break any of the stems. Each one stood strong, without missing so much as a petal. Not one sign of us having ever been there was seen. It put a hollowed feeling within me, the idea that I could've dreamt the whole thing. The pain of the emptiness gutted me and stung my eyes. I blinked them repeatedly trying to find relief, but it was no use. The pain only increased until they flooded. Tears fell along my cheeks in large drops.
I found myself wishing for Marren. For his arms to wrap around me and to hear his voice tell me it wasn't a dream, that we really were there and it's just some enchantment that kept the flowers in perfect shape. The more I wished for that, the emptier I felt. Finally my legs gave out from under me. Falling to the ground, I landed on my knees, unable to hold myself up anymore. I wiped my nose on my sleeve and let the despair wash over me.
“Relena?” Marren's voice floated to me full of worry. It stilled my heart, waiting to beat again, if only it were really him.
I lifted up slowly. Looking through thick bands of brown hair, I saw Marren standing at the edge of the field watching me cry. His eyes wide with alarm and his mouth parted like he wanted to say something, but was too afraid. Then I remembered what he said about feeling when I'm in great emotional pain.
I sniffed. “Marren?”
“What is it? What's bothering you?”
I don't know why but I started to laugh in spite of myself. I brushed my hair from my neck and face, wiped my nose again and shrugged, then gestured to the field.
“You were in that much pain because of the flowers?” he asked, approaching my side. I nodded. “Why uwoduhi?” He took a seat next to me then folded me into his arms.
“You would laugh at me if I told you,” I said through my sniffles.
“I promise I won't laugh. I could never laugh at you for feeling so much pain.”
“When I saw the field and how untouched it was, I thought that what happened here was all in my head or some elaborate dream. I thought it wasn't real.”
He pulled me into him tighter and shushed into my ear, running his hand through the length of my hair. “I assure you, everything that you have experienced with me is real. I'm sorry I didn't explain to you the enchantment on these flowers. I made them grow with the magic I possess. They are very resilient. The ones under us will even pop right back up as if we were never sitting on them.”
I gasped, pulling away and standing up quickly. I had forgotten all about the possibility of them getting damaged with my sitting on them. Then I realized the other foul I made and how that could've been interpreted to him.
“I'm sorry for running off. I just needed to calm down some. I didn't even think of how it could've looked to you, especially after everything you've told me.” I stared into his eyes, never breaking from them for even a blink.
His lips curved slightly at the corners. He motioned for me to sit back down. I hesitated. He motioned more insistently, so I took a seat next to him. He shifted to his back, tucking his arms under his head and gazed at the sky. I laid next to him and thought about how the smell of the tulips was pleasant when the breeze blew through them. They swayed delicately from side to side in the direction the wind blew. I smelled the dirt beneath us, the thick heavy smell of soil—soft and moist. The crisp smell of the leaves on the trees blew around us too. Anything
that I could focus on, I could smell.
“I think I'm going through the change sooner than later,” I said, breaking the silence.
“Why do you think that?” he asked, more from curiosity than to insinuate it was in my head.
“I can smell everything as if it were by itself instead of combined, like it used to be.” I felt his body stiffen and then relax. “What is it?”
“We should get you back before it gets too much closer to night—just to be safe.”
“I'm enjoying it out here. It's relaxing and freeing. Inside those walls, it can be constricting and irritating. Which, speaking of, why were you so mad that I helped? I thought you wanted me to when you nodded.”
“I did, but that didn't mean give her information that would tell her who you are.”
“I didn’t.” I rolled over to his chest and started twisting the lace of his shirt in between my fingers. I listened to the thumping of his heart, picking up in beats ever so slightly but it was still enough for me to notice. Marren started running his fingers through the length of my hair. It felt nice.
“You gave her more than you realize. We still have that training to do and I need to prepare you for the company we have coming. What do you say to meeting me in the ball room to go over some new techniques?”
“Meeting you?”
“I have something I have to do before I join you. Something I want settled before a problem gets out of hand.”
“Very well.” With a sigh, I lifted up from the ground and dusted the loose dirt from my robes. Marren did the same but then held out his arm for me to take. I looked at him curiously and smiled. He nodded once. I took his arm and allowed him to escort me back home.
7
Anticipate And Respond Accordingly
Heart Song Page 7